		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 100 ug
		 oral
		 LSD

		   T+ 1:15
		 200 ug
		 oral
		 LSD

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   195 lb

It is a rare experience that I think is one for the internet, and this is one of them.  This is the first time I ever did acid.  Prior to this I had taken shrooms about 10 times and smoked weed.

I had wanted to try LSD forever, as long as I could remember, but it was so elusive.  Finally with my new job and my life in order I sought to find it again.  This time I came armed with a bit of knowledge that to my surprise, most people (even drug users) are not privy to- Silk Road.  I narrowed down my purchase, from LSD to shrooms, back to LSD, etc.  Made a list of potential products and vendors and the price in bitcoins, which I converted into dollars.

I ordered 5 hits of 100 ug Sour Patch Kids from a vendor in the U.S., one who was trusted and had many rave reviews.  I spent the next few days breathless, not knowing if anything would come, if it would be fake, or if cops would come with it... It came 3 days later, and this was during the holidays.

I went to my mailbox after getting off of work Wednesday, I work the night shift, and found a small package that I thought looked like it might be it.  Breathless with anticipation I took my mail up to my apartment.  I put everything else away then set about opening my mysterious package.  This had been a great night already because I girl I liked texted me at work all night.

Inside was some more packaging and pack of candies in black packaging.  I opened the candies carefully and looked inside- there were 5 of them.  Check.  This was going well so far.  Next came out the blacklight.  They lit up on one side or another, not both (except for one, which my seller told me he had double dosed), so this was another confirmation.  Okay.  Now time to put them away in a really good hiding spot until I find the right time to do them.

I did this and waited until Saturday (New Year's Eve) afternoon, after my couch had been delivered.  All morning was spent going back and forth with myself over taking something that I had no experience with, and from a seller on the internet (good reviews notwithstanding) that I had not seen.  I didn't know if I would freak out or if something bad might happen.  I had read enough trip reports on a reputable harm reduction website to know that bad things can happen with unknown substances.

I had read enough trip reports on a reputable harm reduction website to know that bad things can happen with unknown substances.

  To my credit I felt like an experienced psychonaut, so I felt like if anyone could handle it I could.  Luckily I told myself it was a small amount, and that only LSD is active at such small quantities, and I wondered why I didn't get the blotter.  Actually I had thought that it was sour patch kids blotter.

Finally got my courage up and began walking around with the candy in my hand.  Taking the plunge, I popped it in my mouth and chewed it.  Tasted just like a regular candy.  Hmmm... was this good or bad?  Took some pictures for facebook while I was at it.  Since I couldn't find anyone to trip with, I figured I'd at least have my facebook friends.

Now I am feeling good about my decision and set about doing things that I knew might be a problem later, like uploading my pictures or deciding on what to have for dinner.  Half an hour passes, then 45 minutes, I am looking at the clock but remembering reports about people thinking their acid wasn't working and taking way more than they should have.  I decide to go for a walk.  This is the end of December in Wisconsin, but I don't mind the cold and it is actually beautiful and refreshing.  I was hoping I would start tripping outside too.

I walked for about 15 minutes, around my block and still didn't feel anything.  I was starting to get disappointed.  I thought about how hard it is to get acid or make it, and wondered why I thought that some person on the internet would have it.  I thought about a refund and didn't want to go through that with the seller, and not with my Silk Road account either.  I had read that they log your buyer stats and if you have too many refunds sellers might not want to do business.  I sure didn't need that so I thought about just taking it as a loss.

I figured that since it was the 1 hour and 15 minute mark and no noticeable effects that I would take another.  What could it hurt, right?  So I found the one that he had double dosed with the blacklight and ate that.  If this didn't work there was no way that it was legit.

Sitting at my computer on facebook and the internet looking up things relevant to these matters, I began to feel strange.  Like my vision was getting weird.  Lights were going off in my field of view behind my vision like a firework show or strobe light.  An explosion of color and light.  It would get really light, then really dark, then the trip really started to kick in.  The visual perspective on things changed, they began to take on different shapes and especially when I would look around they would shape-shift.

I was so happy at this point, because I love tripping and this was an excellent start.  It was all interesting, and while it became intense, was never scary.  I thought, I wonder what music sounds like now?  I couldn’t for the life of me find the CD I had created on my computer and I had left the physical CD in my dad’s car, but it was no matter because I just played it on my computer’s library- Hurt’s “Rapture”.  And it did have me enraptured- music sounded so good, like way different and being experienced on more levels, it felt like.  Like it was a direct link to my soul.  Or maybe one of those movies like Constantine where time stops and the protagonist is in hell, but this was heaven.

I started looking around to see what things looked like now.  I had over the past few weeks hooked up my bedroom with all kinds of cool stuff in preparation for this trip- blacklights, psychedelic blacklight posters, lava lamps, incense, and of course my new couch.  Being after Christmas I had a new Sony blu ray player to go with my TV, and had made a DVD with my favorite metal videos.  With much effort I made my way over to my set to put them on.

What was amazing was standing in my kitchen watching the videos, and time would go in slow motion to where I wondered if my DVD had burned wrong or if I was just tripping.  So then I thought about it and I watched it speed back up to normal.  Once it got there, I decided I liked the slow motion better and my mind made it go back.  This was while I was trying to make dinner, which was the most difficult task of the evening by far- I couldn’t coordinate putting the ham in the microwave, taking it out, and putting it on a plate.  Somehow that turned into a 20-step process and I kept getting stuck at step 4.  Looking at my TV and its stand was trippy anyway because the black glass shelves were sort of in a quantum state of superposition- not really in one spot, not really in another.

And the mindscape was so extraordinary as well- I mean total joy and anticipation of every moment coupled with elation at seeing these things take place.  I wanted someone there with me very much.  My friend was at work and couldn’t come over but she said I could text her, and I did.  When I told her that I had to take two, but that I was tripping hard, she said, “Yayayay!”  Haha.

Later I found myself rolling around on the couch in a state of ecstasy, and thought that this would be awesome to do with a girl.  It frees all my emotions and unlocks your consciousness, and I thought that it was sort of like the drug ecstasy, which I have also never done but it seemed to fit the same description.  I wondered about how many trips I had left, if I could get away with taking one the next time and make it three more times.  I was glad that I took the amount that I did, it was amazing at ~300 micrograms and I can take it.  I will probably take the same amount next time and start early in the morning and outside.

What blew my mind as well was the fact that I took presumably 300 millionths of a gram and it had my consciousness crackling like a transformer- I could imagine the trace amount of LSD being like a key to my mind.  It was such a good feeling, like it was supposed to be there, taking every brain activity to another level.  Before the trip I asked my friend what it was like and she said that it was kind of speedy, like it could get going and my mind would not be able to slow down, but I found that I liked this as well.  I was full of energy while I was on it, and when I would get the idea to go do something and do it was like “yay”!  Like look out the balcony door- wow it looked crazy outside.  Like some kind of movie in sepia or something.  I wanted to go out for a walk but that seemed an almost impossible task considering I could hardly make dinner.  Plus it was about 30 degrees out.  I am an adventurous person by nature so I almost did it, but I didn’t want to go to too much effort and freeze myself and I was having such an experience inside.

The only thing I would really want to change for next time is to have someone else around, it was fun to trip by myself regardless but it got lonely especially considering LSD  is a social drug. Set and setting is everything… I picked a time that I was in a good mood, in my own apartment, with a job and most of my life in order. This was a memorable, and defining, experience of my life.  And a positive one since I gave this drug its respect and planned for its use.  I plan to order some shrooms from Silk Road next, as far as visuals and colors bleeding into each other I believe shrooms are more of the right choice, and for a great speedy trip that will take me to another dimension of joy and thought acid is the right choice.  I saw many unreal things on acid too, but it seemed to emphasize a transformed consciousness and altered vision rather than super trippy visuals, at least at 300 micrograms.

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 94307

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 28

Published: Aug 22, 2018	Views: 966

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LSD (2) : General (1), First Times (2), Glowing Experiences (4), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 3 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 4 mg
		 oral
		 Pharms - Alprazolam

		 IV
		 Pharms - Diazepam

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   225 lb

To understand the context of this its important to know that this report happened 2 months after this experience.

After an incredibly negative and distressing MDMA trip while on a steroid cycle 2 months ago, I had decided to cease all drug use for 2 months, as I developed severe panic attacks and health anxiety from that experience. I continued my steroid cycle and kept on lifting and going to the gym and trying to live a healthy lifestyle. After 2 months since that experienced passed, I decided to venture back into LSD, one of my all time favorite substances. Since my bad experience with the MDMA, I became paranoid that I had done damage to my heart, even though when I was hospitalized when the MDMA experience happened I was assured my heart was fine. I had visited 3 more cardiologists and had 6 ECGs done which showed no abnormalities, and on the day of this experience, I decided I would go to a top hospital in my country and get checked again, and if everything turned out fine, I would stop this irrational fear and ease back into recreational drug use.

So I had an echocardiogram done, which confirmed that my heart was in excellent shape, without the slightest abnormality and that I had to stop worrying so much, my steroid cycle was also over, so I decided that it was time to trip again.

So I decided that was it, I arrived home with my girlfriend and I took out 3 LSD tabs, I had previously done this same batch countless times with great experiences, the dealer claims they are 150 ug tabs each but of course he has no way of proving that

the dealer claims they are 150 ug tabs each but of course he has no way of proving that

, but a single one gives me a decently intense trip. Before all of this happened, I used to trip weekly from this batch with my girlfriend, my tolerance grew so high I was taking 5 tabs at one point. I made the idiotic mistake of dosing 3 tabs thinking I would be alright if I had done 5 before, not taking into account I had been drug-free for 2 months and my tolerance had dropped considerably.

I always knew not to trip when having negative thoughts, I was extremely anxious and worried about tripping, but I wanted to prove to myself I could beat this anxiety so bad I still ate the 3 tabs. Maybe 30 minutes after ingesting them.I knew I had made a big mistake, I started having paranoic thoughts about my heart, obsessively taking my blood pressure every 10 minutes. I noted some slight vasoconstriction, normal for LSD use, but in my paranoid state I thought it was really severe, so I got into a hot shower to try to open the veins up a little bit, I looked at myself in the mirror and I thought I looked extremely pale, but my girlfriend said I looked fine. I jumped into the hot shower like a madman with my clothes on, thinking I needed to stop the vasoconstriction quickly. I also started getting chest pains and I felt I couldnt breathe. I begged my girlfriend to let me take some Xanax, but she told me I had to be stronger than that and that it was all in my head. This proved to be a great mistake as I ended up being hospitalized which could have been prevented by promptly using the benzos. I got out of the shower and I broke into a cold sweat, I was sure I was having a heart attack. I asked her to call an ambulance immediately, she realized the severity of the situation finally and gave me 4MG of Xanax, but it was too late...

While the Xanax kicked in I kept feeling worse and worse, I also started having very strange sensations I have had on other LSD trips, like when I took the Xanax, I could 'feel' it going down my stomach, and I could feel it breaking down and working, its hard to explain. I also had a sensation of feeling my brain, like I would feel part of my brain like it was being stimulated, and I would get some jaw clenching like I get in LSD when I felt that.

I would feel part of my brain like it was being stimulated, and I would get some jaw clenching like I get in LSD when I felt that.

 Finally I told her to call an ambulance, which was completely idiotic since by the time the ambulance arrived I was feeling much better since the Xanax had kicked in. I still ran out to the ambulance without a shirt on, I must have looked crazy. I dont remember much about the hospital stay because of the heavy benzo dose I took, but I remember that basically I obviously wasnt having a heart attack and it was a panic attack. I received IV valium, which I protested because I had already taken Xanax, I remember saying out loud several times 'it was just a panic attack, how stupid I am...' I remember my father and my girlfriend at bedside with me, and other random stuff... I finally was discharged that same day at midnight. I have never been able to get past the shame of the burden I was that day on my father and not preventing the hospital visit by taking the Xanax more promptly.

I always try to ride out panic attacks first since that experience, but if I know after 10 or 15 minutes its not going to get better, its better to take benzos than to be hospitalized or endure a traumatic experience.

Exp Year: 2018	ExpID: 112211

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 21

Published: Aug 24, 2018	Views: 1,865

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LSD (2) : Train Wrecks &amp; Trip Disasters (7), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 75 ug
		 sublingual
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 1:35
		 100 mg
		 oral
		 MDA
		 (liquid)

		   T+ 1:35

		 oral
		 Vitamin C
		 (liquid)

		   T+ 1:45
		 50 mg
		 insufflated
		 MDA
		 (powder / crystals)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   120 lb

Around 18:45 my boyfriend, E, and I cut a 150 ug tab of LSD in half and each placed one under our tongue. I had done acid previously three times and E had taken it on four occasions. Due to previous experiences with semi-bad trips and the fact we planned to mix additional substances, we decided to stick with this relatively low dosage of about 75 ug each.

After the tabs began to dissolve we left our apartment and took a fairly brief bike ride along the Missouri river. Perhaps an hour or so had passed and we decided to turn back. On our return we passed by an old friend of E’s whom he hadn’t seen in years, A. As the LSD had not set in fully, we invited A and his girlfriend back to our flat. E and A smoked a couple bowls of mj and A left soon afterword. The full effects had still not set in. Anxious to hurry along the process, we each measured out about 100 mg of MDA and mixed the powder into orange juice. This was around 20:20. About ten minutes later we each bumped an additional 50 mg.

We left the apartment and began to walk throughout the nearby neighborhoods. Less than two blocks from our flat I began to perceive the vastness of the sidewalk. I realized we were walking down the center of the road rather than the side. Everything expanded and almost pulsed. It felt so insanely good to be walking, to be outside – to be alive. We realized it would be a good idea to head home. The LSD body feeling was overwhelming. My teeth ground and my skin stretched. My whole body seemed to be shedding, replacing itself with a newer, and fresher outer layer.

On the way back we passed several piles of bricks and an area where it appeared a wall was being rebuilt. I sat on the bricks and felt waves of reality and disassociation rolling through me. I began to clutch two small bits of bark and rock. Clinging to them, turning them over in my hands, unable to set them down.

We had had plans to finish the night with a small bump of ketamine; however, the feelings of the MDA and LSD were so overpoweringly stark, that we decided to hold off. When we first returned to the apartment, it was like a different world. Bright and shifting, strange and wonderful – I began to run in circles about the room, feeling an overwhelming exuberance of “running on happiness.” It felt good to hop, to pace, to spin. Everything felt new and exciting.

We returned outside and began to walk in circles around our courtyard. We paced around and around. Talking rapidly, cautiously following a cat that was wearing a brightly blinking collar. I several times found myself accidentally approaching the cat, which promptly yowled and trotted backward. Still, even when we stopped following the animal, the cat began to follow us – keeping a safe distance. My mind felt very much like the mind of a cat. I watched other humans warily, edging away from anyone accept E. Uncomfortable and off guard by their distinctly foreign consciousness. There were other animals in the courtyard – more than I ever remembered seeing before – rabbits and squirrels darted about me in an endless perpetual dance.

Finally we returned to the flat and turned on a black light and music. The ground and walls lost all texture. I was in a purple cube with nothing on the floors or walls. The area rug and ottoman seemed to be floating islands in the middle of a vast emptiness. I lay on my back and seemed to tread water timelessly. Music – usually a definitive part of my life – seemed strangely distant and uninteresting.

At one point I felt as if I was watching myself in third person.

Time lost all definition and distinction. Deep into my mind I soared, and then, bolts of pure adrenaline and fear shook me. Someone was knocking on the door – unfriendly voices were calling my name. In an instant all lights and music were off and I was crouching on the cold floor shaking in dread. Desperately trying to choose a method of action, we dashed to the bedroom. Then, I recognized the voice. Astonished to hear my parents, who had never been to our apartment, nor even knew the address, outside the door at nearly midnight. Startled, I flung the door open. They demanded to know why our phones were off, if we were all right, and why we hadn’t checked in. E remained in the bedroom and I mumbled something about having been asleep and my phone breaking. My mother mentioned the music and lights she had seen from outside. Unable to speak properly, I hugged her, and somehow managed to reassure her of my safety. Immediately after closing the door I sank to the floor in panic. The people knocking – the outside world, suddenly seemed unfriendly and hostile. The flat was our oasis of safety and other people had nothing but evil intentions. I had a horrible feeling as if I was hiding out and had been discovered by the police or Nazis or something. I refused to turn the lights or music back on for another 45 minutes. I felt convinced we were unsafe. My parents must have noticed my grinding teeth and saucer plate eyes. At last E managed to calm me down and we settled down on the couch. At last I relaxed and as the most extreme affects seemed to be waning – we began to discuss life and death and everything in between. Our conversation delved and rose to levels of wisdom and ludicrously beyond my normal comprehension. The world – money, humans, history, society, knowledge – it all rolled around my mind clearly. I saw everything objectively – I felt above it all.

Still I clutched the bark (a memento of my first LSD trip) and rock (actually a shard of meteorite E once gave me) desperately. E rotated meditation balls in his hands. The rhythm of the objects infused our conversation and it felt like I was powering my mind and altering my perception in a controlled way using these ancient objects – tree and meteorite. I felt their age and weight, their density and breadth.

I experienced nausea off and on – but attributed it to the large quantity of orange juice I had drunken that day and the fact I had fasted much less than I normally would have.

The realization that E had work in the morning finally dawned on us. We debated for nearly an hour whether sleep was conceivable. It had been nearly nine hours since we had taken the acid and the affects were considerably milder. Eventually we lay down in the bedroom holding holding hands – feeling more bonded than ever.

I don’t remember drifting into sleep. My dreams and reality were forever intertwined in a jumbled tumbling mandala. I woke up that morning with a jolt. I was hyper aware and sore, but more content than I had been in months. To this moment my teeth still clench and I can rarely stop pacing – but everything is good and whole and I’m ready for my life to begin again. I’m ready to face school and work and family and responsibility in a new light. LSD is a beautiful experience, although it can take me to levels of darkness unimaginable – the light is what fills me and changes me in the weeks following. I am driven by a desire to be alive and an acceptance of inevitable death.

Exp Year: 2014	ExpID: 102897

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: 18

Published: Aug 24, 2018	Views: 2,449

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LSD (2), MDA (34) : General (1), Combinations (3), Hangover / Days After (46), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 3 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   175 lb

I preface by saying this is a very long trip report. Read as you please.

Whatever is said here cannot be fully accepted as truth. For words such as these will never be able to fully pass on to another an experience of such magnificent transcendence. We are limited by our vocabulary and way of communicating, thus we are unable to express to another the true essence or extent of an experience. 'What can be shown, cannot be said', as Ludwig Wittgenstein put it. A psychedelic experience can be shown but not said. So, the words that follow are just conjured up metaphors, allegories, analogies, images, and symbols that hopefully will give at least a single individual a creative idea, an epiphany, or an inspirational breakthrough - at least for a moment. Try and read everything here poetically, if it resonates with you, vibe with it.

This experience has taken me awhile to somewhat articulate  for others to try and understand. The reason is that words don't do it justice. I kept this experience internalized to fully embrace it, integrate it into my being, and not have the use of language taint and contort its meaning or essence. Even now I cautiously type these words fully apprehending not one single person will feel or experience what I experienced. Maybe they have or will, but to describe such an experience with words one will never truly know. One just has to trust the other person. So, I humbly ask for your trust; not your belief, but trust.

As a psychedelic voyager and explorer, I merge into the vastness that seems to be mind. Through the doors, windows, gates, labyrinths, and palaces I find myself. During these experiences, I learn and also remember. As well as try and bring back some form of an idea that can be articulated. Bring back a meme if you will. Something that helps people get through life simpler and easier, even if that feeling comes for a moment. These memes in a sense give permission to others, permission to experience a novel understanding about life and what the psychedelic experience has to offer.

Set: healthy mental state, calmly excited and trepidatious for the experience

Setting: my room, alone, AC and fan on, completely dark except for one candle that was lit toward the end of my bed on a bookshelf

Intention: to be the center of my own mandala

10:30 pm - drop

As I waited for the come up, I sat/laid down on the bed and played my Kaizen steel drum.

11:03 pm - first initial energy building up

The drum sounded spectacular. Each note would resonate throughout my whole being.

11:23 pm - slight acid feel

Around this time, I remember walking into my living room and my dog Tia (who is my sitter for most of my trips) was laying on the couch. I was petting her for a bit, then I went back into my room and she followed me.

12:07 am - everything is beautiful

I remember the notes on the drum sounded blissfully beautiful. I was also in awe over how soft and beautiful Tia's fur was - she is a Belgian Malinois. Petting her head and ears felt like silk. At this time everything was perfect and life felt divine.

Luscious flowing waves

I felt the oceanic connectedness feeling that many feel on psychedelics (common on LSD), also while petting Tia her fur felt like waves. Luscious flowing waves.

Boundaries shifting

This is when I first started to notice that my mind was becoming untethered and connected at the same time. If you have ever seen the fMRI image of the two brains: one on LSD and one sober brain, you will see how everything is looser and more connected while on LSD. I had that visualization of my brain and the connections I was making in the moment. I felt every inch of my neuronal pathways and every basement and attic that was previously left untouched in my mind, now connected to the whole.

Insanity gained and insanity lost (I wonder if I meant to write 'sanity gained and sanity lost', but I'm not entirely sure). I had some backups on hand if anything were to go south. I had Xanax at my bedside in case I started to go through a rough time, and sure enough, I did go through that rough time. I can't count how many times those small white pills went through my mind. I was so convinced that I was going mad that I knew I needed to take one or else I would lose my mind for good. Somehow, I decided to ride through the hell without taking the little white pill. I humbly ensure that this was the right thing to do.

At this time, the trip took a turn. Because my boundaries were dissolving so severely, it felt as though I was literally losing my mind. As Terence McKenna said, 'The psychedelic mantra... 'I've done it this time!''. I say this with the utmost sincerity in my voice... I honestly felt I was going mad. I felt schizophrenic. I have no direct family history of schizophrenia and do not know what a schizophrenic person thinks. But I convinced myself I was losing my mind. I would walk around my house, stopping randomly, and continue walking saying repeatedly, 'what the hell is happening!'. I then laid back down on the bed with Tia and I experienced a transcendent catharsis. Through the pain and anguish of losing my mind, I discovered I am the only thing in the universe. I was shown to be a singularity. With this realization, I bawled my eyes out for a good amount of time. The reason I was crying so hard was that of the pain in understanding that I'm the only thing that exists. I'm all alone. 'The last dance you dance, you dance alone'. Coming back from what felt like hell and expanding back out of the singularity, I had a new perspective. Coming out of being alone, I realized I do not have to live this life completely alone. We want to connect to others, that seems to me to be a main goal of humans. I felt tremendous love, hope, and compassion when I realized that there were two pillows on the bed I was laying on. This second pillow belonged to and symbolized my girlfriend. I understood I have someone with me side by side to live this mystery of existence together with. I did cry again at this point as well because of the emotions that were surging through me at the time. This was another lesson that we create the reality in which we live in.

Because I did this trip that night, because I went through that experience and felt those things, it felt as though I changed the structure and time of reality. My reality. And the reality of everyone in my reality, which seems to be me. I apprehended what shamans do. They are arbiters in a sense, who transform the nature of reality in the moment to a truer or novel form. The shaman is a true magician.

Toward the end of the trip, I remember having amazing sensations on my skin and in my skin. It felt as though I could feel the fabric or net of reality on the 4th-dimensional level, in my 3-dimensional body. It was as though moving my arms up and down felt like they were moving through spider webs, but the spider webs were inside my skin and attached to my skin. It seemed as though I was experiencing the network and connectedness of reality through my skin.

It seemed as though I was experiencing the network and connectedness of reality through my skin.

 This was a sensation I have never experienced before. It was as though after expanding out of the singularity, I was downloading myself back into a reality I was creating. And this was the physical sensation of that experience.

8:30 am - end of the trip

The rest that follows are some ideas that came to me during and after this particular experience.

We are constantly seeking. Seeking on many levels: material, spiritual, psychological. We seek and seem to never be satisfied. We seek out into matter for the next thing: seek a car, a house, a lover, a book, a job, drugs, money, pleasure. We seek spiritual enlightenment through various practices including yoga, meditation, psychedelics, gurus, float tanks. We seek psychological health or closure through different things: psychotherapy, other people, lovers, family, friends, knowledge, power. We are constantly seeking.

One blinding message I got out of this trip was that the thing we are seeking or finding seems to be ourselves. We are seeking ourselves. We are seeking outward and also inward, but what you have to realize in that all of this seeking, you are just seeking yourself. I truly understood this. I found myself during those 10 hours. I became the center of my own mandala. The next day after the trip I went on a long hike in nature to process the whole experience. During this hike, I had the song Wake Me Up by Avicii playing inside my head, 'All this time I've been finding myself, And I didn't know I was lost'. These lyrics had a tremendous impact on my mental state at the time. By the end of that hike, I felt as though I found myself and understood how nature loves courage. (reading this experience over now, I see that I lost myself after this experience. It took a while to find myself again and gather the pieces of my mind to put them back together).

We're constantly distracting ourselves, distracting ourselves from ourselves. Distracting ourselves through various mediums, activities, and thoughts in our lives. Distracting ourselves with TV, with technology, with other people, money, etc. After this trip, however, I discovered the utmost empathy for myself and others when we all distract ourselves. Finding and remembering who you are can be a scary thing. It's only human to use things to distract us from ourselves. And I have nothing against this spiral cycle. It's a part of being human and many human beings need it. There can be pain in discovering the self. I understand why we distract ourselves from that. Like the Bodhisattva after discovering himself, he goes back into the collective to help others realize their true potential. He apprehended the distractions others and even himself creates and has empathy because he discovered himself and remembers. Just try and remember who you are.

Discovering and experiencing that I am the center of my own mandala created a vivid feeling inside myself that I will try and express as an idea. This was the deepest lesson I learned throughout this entire trip, so it will not be easy to articulate. In fact, it seems not even possible to drag its essence from a higher dimensional matrix into this 3dimensional language. So, what follows must be taken simply as an idea. I discovered that I am the center of my own mandala. To get an image of this: if I am the center of my own mandala, I in turn am connected to everything else. Everything else around me seems to be a fractal extension, or difference in the pattern; essentially me. Everything and everyone seems to be me. I am everything and everyone. During the 2-4-hour mark was the toughest and most challenging part of the whole experience. All boundaries were dissolving and it felt like everything was closing in to a single point. A singularity. Certainly, part of the challenge was me going through ego death, but I have experienced ego death before and this had a different flavor to it. I became the singularity. I discovered that I am an essential part of the whole. I am a big player in the game of life. All that exists and ever existed in this/my universe seemed to be myself. I am all that exists. Just me. Nothing is 'real' except my own direct experience.

For some, this view of 'I am the only thing that exists' may come off as egotistical. However, I would completely argue the opposite. If I truly experience myself as the only thing that ever existed and exists, then that means that everything in my life: every situation, every person, every being, every dream, every conversation, every setting, you, my dog, my neighbor, the sun, the moon, the ocean, that tree, that cloud, that star, that whisper in the wind, EVERYTHING, seems to be me. If I see that, I then have tremendously more compassion and love for not only myself but also every being and everything on the planet. If I am everyone and everything, wouldn't I want to treat myself with compassion and love? This brings happiness. So, having love, compassion, empathy, and all these other good virtues for others, literally seems like you are giving oneself love, compassion, and empathy. This view surely gives clarity to the whole human situation. And this realization had and still has a profound effect on the way I conduct myself in the world I create. It's like the Golden Rule: Treat others as you would like to be treated.

Toward the end, probably at the 5 or 6-hour mark, I vividly understood once again that we create the world we live in. We construct, from the ground up, our reality with our choices, thoughts, and intentions. Also, with the understanding that I am everything, I choose what my life will be like and how I feel. Psychologically, emotionally, and physically. We are the heroes of our own story. We write that story.

One idea: no one, especially the ones I love wholeheartedly, should experiment with these substances unless they are truly psychically empowered. Even if one thinks they are, they will not be able to un-see what they will see on these substances. Reason for this statement came to me after the trip. When using psychedelics as tools and in a shamanic context, there is a great deal of challenge, pain and suffering one CAN go through during the experience - this, however, can be one of the most beneficial parts of an intense psychedelic experience. I love my friends and family too much for them to have to go through those types of experiences like I have been through. I care for them too deeply for them to encounter anguish, distress, and very very challenging experiences. Carl Jung once said, 'There is no coming to consciousness without pain.' And I think he was on to something. These types of experiences can possibly be the one thing one needs most in their life, and my loved ones may want this sort of thing to happen to them. If that's so, I would be right alongside them in their discovery of self. But after this trip, I couldn't bear to think of having the same pain and suffering I went through be put on anyone I truly love.

After a very long and arduous 10-hour trip, through my expanded awareness at the time, a single word manifested in my head. This occurred after the remembrance that I indeed create and construct my own reality. This word will only imply meaning to myself, for only I can interpret the magnitude of the word corresponding to my life and all of life in general. The word was 'stay'. For those who have watched the movie Interstellar, you can see how this word seems to have a weight attached to it. Stay. Many of us here on earth move very fast and believe this seems to be the way to get things done. What this experience gave me was the affirmation to slow down, to stay; especially in the moment. Stay.

 What this experience gave me was the affirmation to slow down, to stay; especially in the moment. Stay.

Many of us are constantly pushing toward something, pushing toward a certain activity, or pushing toward a job/career, or pushing toward other people, or pushing in personal/social development, or pushing in the moment. I think letting go seems more appropriate than pushing. It's hard to get such a convoluted point across without contradicting oneself. People may be thinking I am against pushing towards things, and in life, you need to push towards certain things to grow and learn. Sure, maybe, and yes; but letting go seems to be truer to oneself and life almost. Things are unfolding as they should be, even if you have no conscious understanding of that, there seems to be a process flowing underneath it all. Letting go helps you flow. Plus, this seems to be a prescription for more happiness and less anxiety. I say letting go, not meaning let everything go in life and just not give a shit about anything; but let go of trivial things and negativity, and just have common sense. It seems to be like the coincidencia oppositorum, the union of opposites; where in order to push farther one needs to let go more.

As Terence McKenna said, 'True ecstasy is a union of opposites. It's the felt experience of paradox, so it is exalting and illuminating at the same time that it's terrifying and threatening. It dissolves all boundaries'. For those that read this entire report, understand the set and setting I was in, as well as my intention. These factors greatly influenced the trip I had. Every acid trip, or mushroom, or MDMA, or salvia, or DMT trip will be different for everyone every single time. Where you are and your mindset at the time, as well as your intention sometimes seems even more influential than the actual substance you are ingesting. However, dose also greatly affects your experience as well. Even when you take steps toward a safe and secure journey on a psychedelic with a proper set and setting, very challenging experiences can still occur. However, I am sure glad I had this difficult experience in my own house, alone. If I was anywhere else, especially in an uncomfortable setting, who knows what evils could have been unleashed.

The truths one sees while on psychedelics are not so much truths of reality, but more like models of reality. After having a deep, transforming experience one may think they have reached some form of enlightenment or nirvana. It may feel that way, but try to understand that the experience that you had seems to be a glimpse of only a small pixel of reality. A model one can take up and play around with. An idea to fool around with at the dinner table of the collective consciousness. Some models are more suitable than others, depending on your current situation it seems. It's difficult to say if one model seems better than another because no one can truly know this. I understand why psychedelic pioneers from the past say you can get trapped in the beauty and awe of a trip, and believe that that experience was the truth. Try and see that the 'truth' you experienced was just one truth out of infinite truths. Or one model out of infinite models. It seems as though it's our job to discern what models, ideas, and truths are worth preserving and discussing.

I am still unpacking this experience.

This seems only to be the beginning.

Exp Year: 2016	ExpID: 111209

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 23

Published: Sep 5, 2018	Views: 968

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LSD (2) : General (1), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 1:00
		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 0:00
		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Tobacco - Cigarettes

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   143 lb

Where do I begin? Well lets start off by saying these tabs we got were the most dank little things we have ever had. It was so intense that it made me go SUPER treehugger..something I am usually not. I'm honestly still coming down from my trip and I need to express this, yet I cant. It all started on Easter Day 2010, I met up with my friend G and C on a chilly cloudy day, we planned to watch the movie Hot Tub Time Machine and go back to G's house where we would drop our tabs and spend the night. It was all in a way first for all of us, my friend C was taking 3 tabs for his first time, I was taking it again in 3 years! And for my friend G well it truly was his first time.

Now I'm going to fast forward through the night to the point of where we drop the tabs because that's the only part I want/need to explain...

The time is now 9:53pm..as we got back from the movies we were nervous yet excited to begin our journey with Lucy, we went up to G's room and found our 10 strip tab and cut them into individual pieces and we all took 1 in symmetry. We decided to go on a walk and wait an hour then take our other tabs. We walk around G's neighborhood complex, we wander over to and fro for a long time and walk by this little mail slot area with a bright florescent light over it; right there we decide this is our place where we will go back to and see if everything looks the same. After a long long long hour we drop our second tab (for C his second and third tab) all the while sipping on some tasty orange juice, C calls his brother to and tells him to hang out with us. Now we wait for another 30 minutes walking all around smoking and watching everything. Suddenly C's brother drives up and embraces our presence so joyfully. By this time we were all feeling different and happy but not yet tripping...not even close. We all decide to go on a walk and we eventually get back to the mail slot..this is where my trip began..we all looked at the mail slot area and agree in harmony that something is different. At this moment I take notice to a tree next to a lamp post with purple flowers that were boasting with vibrance.. It was incredible! By now I start to feel overwhelmed and over stimulated and lay on the side walk smoking a cigarette and watching the smoke, my friend C joins be on the ground laying down and we became part of it.

The time is around 11:30pm and we are laying on the sidewalk tripping! I start to see intense tracers of everyones faces and my hands. MY friend G starts to get a little paranoid and tells us to get up and that were talking too loud, which I totally understand because it was where he lived and it was his first time with Lucy, C and I struggle to get up from the ground as C says 'but it just feels so right..' We eventually get up and walk over near to C's brothers car and just hang out again. C starts to put on some Beatles 'Let it Be', I again start to grasp the the sidewalk and just lay down and enjoy life as my G starts to describe what he is feeling in immense detail. C, C's brother and I all nod in agreement 'yeah dude..just 'let it be' like the beatles would say.' By now we all decide we are about to peak so we better go inside so we all say our departures with C's brother, it was like losing a close friend, we all exchanged hugs and said bye.

Somehow we end up in G's room trying to get comfortable. Lucky for us we had a strobe light available with color filters. I plug it in and set it on an open drawer with the green filter. Everything now starts to come in patterns. As G lied on his bed exploring the wonderful world of LSD, C and I tried to settle into these little gamers chairs but were relentless and eventually C pulled aside his chair and we both laid on the carpet.

This is where my severe visuals start. I took off my glasses and closed my eyes and saw patterns of spades, diamonds, pyramids, and clovers under my eyelids all in rainbow! As C, G and I all stared with our eyes open in the room lit on and off and on and off again by the strobe light we (atleast I) started to see the energy in everything moving from one another between the desk then to the carpet then to me. Almost like everything was alive and connected and were all transparent and the electricity running between us all red, green and blue.

Now the whole time we are listening to music and the I turned on 'The Unicorns' which have a trippy lo-fi sound to them and we all begin to peak hard. G, C and I start to watch the patterns on the ceilings and walls. We eventually get tired of this and look out the window...the extraordinary things we see..the leaves are like hands moving in a motion as if they were petting cats. The American flap on the neighbors house its roaring and colors are powerful. C and I are raving to go outside now; I start to explain nature and I want to be one with mothernature and that everything is alive and mustn't be killed! C explains 'Outside has been there all along, and now I have never wanted to go outside more in my life!' G calms us down by telling us that his Grandmother is sleeping downstairs and that we can't leave. I turn away from the window in disgust for ever making me want to go so bad..

The time is now 2:00am and we are all doing our own thing. G is lying on his bed feeling 'it' and C is..well C is doing everything he is looking at the walls, relaxing, touching things that look weird. I begin to love my visuals and grab the strobe light and flash it on the wall watching how everything has a flower pattern. I begin to feel the urge to see a tree and be outside again. But G, C and I all gather together and start the strobe light again and try to substitute our crave to go outside with overpowering visuals; we go on explaining the colors for several of tens of minutes.

The time is now 2:40am and we all hear rain outside! We all start to fumble around to get to the window! As we look out the blinds we want to go out more than ever. I try to enlighten the mood and pull all the blinds up and open the window. We all stare out into the abyss of the world and have a long conversation of rain and how its perfect for LSD for at least 30 minutes. I carry on babbling about how I want to be at one with nature and we all see eye to eye that we NEED to go outside but we CANT. I start to explain we are in a window of opportunity between the rain outside and 'fake' technology inside. C points out both literally and metaphorically we are in a window..we are all astonished.

Eventually we all settle down because we are mad we cant go outside and don't want to tease ourselves with rain anymore. I close the blinds and we turn on the lights and look in G's huge closet mirror. We light up some incense sticks- they smelling fucking incredible! C and I start to 'wave' around and look in the mirror. I put my hands in my pockets and I feel dime. I pull it out feeling every single groove on it and tell C to feel it. C starts to rant about all the grooves as he passed it to G and we start to say it probably has a 100 years worth of history and suddenly C drops the dime! Oh no! ..oh well..who cares it was just dime......

The time is now 3:24am and we are sitting down on the ground between the giant mirror and G's bed where he is still lying down. The strobe light is on once again and I show C a cord for G's alarm clock and we are astounded by its brilliance of pure whiteness. We show G and he is too speechless. We deicide to turn on the real lights and now I start to look into the wonders of my teeth and my mouth. I explain this to G and C. G says 'its like I'm seeing my teeth for the first time..' I begin to feel a Course Catalog for the university that I'll be going to that has a cover that looks like wood. It was breathing and actually felt like real wood! The great feeling we all know and love on LSD is the 'breathing' effect of everything and here it starts to take affect as we stare at the lamp shade, our shirts, our hands and G's bed sheets. We begin to listen 'The Unicorns' again, we start to find it amazing and how awesome it goes with our trip. At the end of one of their songs you hear them breaking a bottle in the song; I deliberately announce 'Did you hear that? That was just our ego shattering..' From now tlll around 5:00am we are on and off with the Television watching cartoons and frequently switching to human shows. We end up on Aqua Teen Hunger Force for a while and I started to really see the brilliance of color and patterns changing on the Television. The colors were not chaining but instead becoming constantly bright then brighter then just bright then brighter again! They were never NOT bright.

The time now is 5:00am and we dawdle into the curiosities of the internet on C and I's iPod Touches. I visit a website and become dumbfounded on a picture of the universe. I show G and C and we started to have intense visuals once again. We roam over to google and start image searching 'the Universe' I find several photos and save them. We all gravitate towards a specific picture of the Universe with stars and dots around it. I gazed stunned and stupefied that all the stars and dots became purple, yellow, blue and green and started to pulsate and almost look like million mini fireworks as the Universe in the middle swayed like and ocean. C and I must have looked at this photo for a total of two hours, that was how amazing it was.

The time now is 5:50am and we have just ended watching the news on the Television dumbfounded by what was going on in the world. We all decide that at 6:15am we we're going to go outside. As C and I wait the seemingly endless 25 minutes to be up we gawk over the picture of the Universe again raving about how its still 'alive' after almost 8 hours and that we got some good shit for the visuals to last this long.

The time is now finally 6:15am! We prepare to leave and get everything ready. We walk outside-it has now been 8 and 1/2 hours since we dropped-and everything is BRIGHT, VIBRANT, and BEAUTIFUL. It was the most amazing sight I have ever seen. I couldn't help but blurt out 'Its like everything happened like it was on purpose!' We walked around for a bit taking in everything and then sat a park just looking at everything nature holds for us for an hour. As we are walking C points out all these snails on the sidewalk; C and I jump onto the rode scared to kill a life as G just continues walking..

[Erowid Note:
Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]

We walk back to my car and I ask G and C 'Wanna go for a drive?' They animately say 'Yes!' I start the car and put on my iPod; The Beatles!!!! We soon discover that The Beatles fit and sync with everything! Everything is connected! About what we talk about and how it comes up in the song we are listening to. I back up slowly and start to drive..I travel down long roads (suddenly 'The Long and Winding Road' comes on the speakers!) and drive forever! We get to a big hill and once we got over it there it was- the most beautiful mountain side ever! We all fume and bellow at the sight. However we get to the end of our road and make a U-turn back home. Driving now was just pure euphoria while listening to the Beatles. Now instead of going back we decide to drive by our High School and look at it. On the way I saw a girl in a car next to me and was astounded! She was ALLURING, LOVELY, PREPOSSESSING, and all the things a goddess should be. I didn't want to say anything, but after seeing other women in other cars I had to say it 'Dude I'm just gunna say it, is it just me or are women just sooooo beautiful!!!' They were just like vastly bewitching and C &amp; G both agree and we all explain how we all saw different women in different cars that were all drop-dead GORGEOUS!

The time is now 7:40am and we have just arrived back at G's house. We go to his room and watch Television. A Jackie Chan movie was on call Mr. Nice Guy...Jackie Chan was intense!! He was our hero and savior; this guy could use anything around him to fend off evil! He was about to be ran over by a gigantic construction truck and used his feet to kick off the tire while on his back on the ground to avoid getting run over! Jackie Chan, a innocent bystander, risked his life to save to two girls he didn't even know!! I start to crack my neck, knuckles and toes and explain how good it feels. C joins in on the cracking and for a moment we just sat and cracked. We all suddenly get hungry and start craving some Chicken Biscuits from Chick-Fil-A!

The time is now 8:25am and as we leave we wonder if we are still tripping so we look at the picture of the Universe again it was still moving and bright! We go outside and flick rain drops off leaves enjoying and soaking in everything. I drive us to Chick-Fil-A where we gorge on the best food known to man but suddenly after I eat one I start to become profound on the reflections of everything created from the rain and became full. C &amp; G were still hungry so they ordered another one and feasted away! But something happened..as I watched them eat those Chicken Biscuits I realized the pain the chicken had to go threw to make us have a happy meal. I felt disgusted and yet at the same time I felt it was a fair trade off because they taste so good.

The time is now 9:00am we eventually go back to G's house and bam! There was another Jackie Chan movie on Television called 'Who Am I?' We all laugh and watch. We can't stay on one channel and switch back  and forth between the Jackie Chan Film, The Fresh Prince, and a show on the SyFy channel with Jennifer Love Hewitt. Eventually we settle on the SyFy show and start listening to 'The Unicorns' again and surprisingly it synced up perfectly!?! The song ended precisely as the show when to commercial..you had to be there.

Finally it is now 11:00am and C &amp; I decide it's time to go home. We gather our stuff together for awhile all the while listening to 'The Unicorns' We get to my car and we say our farewells to G and drive off after a bit of rustling in the car just making sure we had everything. I drop off C at his home after an awesome night and tell him it was incredible and for him to say 'Hi' to his brother for me.

I'm HOME! I park my car in the garage feeling the music flow through me. I get all my stuff and walk slowly to my room I get to the top of the stairs and a strange but similar figure stands there asking me if I even slept, I responded 'ehh not really.' My mom then advises me to shower and get some rest. I can only say yes. I put all my stuff away and in the fullness of time step into the shower...wow..what can I say..it was like a..REBIRTH!! I step out of the shower a new man. I get dressed in some comfy clothes and go downstairs to have some water and then it hit me! These were memories that I remember but were all jumbled up and had not line of chronological order. I quickly went back to my room to chat with C &amp; G on aim to reminisce of a night that only happened hours ago!

I then became incredibly hungry and decided to heat up some Extra Crispy KFC mmmmm finger lickin' good! As I reached inside the bucket I saw some crumbs of the Extra Crispy skin of the KFC at the bottom (you know what I'm talking about!) and I ate them with my fingers like a starving caveman! Ironically my friend G hates the skin on fried chicken! What blasphemy!! Anyways that leads up to the time being now- the present: a gift. My chicken is downstairs waiting for me and I and writing this report still. SO now I must end it; BUT let me end it by saying this: LSD is something you cannot describe with words I only maybe wrote out 65% of what happened last night on this report. If I wrote all 100% of it it would be too long as it already is!!! FUCK look how long this shit is!

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 84714

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 17

Published: Sep 11, 2018	Views: 791

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LSD (2) : General (1), Nature / Outdoors (23), Music Discussion (22), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 0.5 hits
		 oral
		 1P-LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 0:30
		 0.25 hits
		 oral
		 1P-LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   70 kg

Thorax focal point

I finally got my hands on some acid after trying to find it for about a year. I bought 5 250ug tabs (about 13€ each).

I have long been scared of LSD. Having had some traumatic experiences in my life (lost my father) I worried these things could affect me in a bad way. I'm also that kind of person that overthinks everything and feels a lot of paranoia. I was sure I'd have a bad trip.

I took my first dose on the 13th of february at my apartment, approx 80ug (1/3 of a tab) and it didn't do anything as I attempted to redose an hour in to make it kick in. Smoked some weed to help it get going but nothing. I was a bit discouraged. I talked with my dealer and he said I might just be very resistant. I had rolled on MDMA just a few days prior however so we judged that might be why. I was still nervous as could be about taking this low dose.

18th of february, I woke up at 06:00. It was a nice morning, dark and quiet but yet comforting. I contemplated taking the LSD in the early morning for a bit before deciding to take half a tab at 06:30, and then I took another quarter by 07:00.

Within the first 20 minutes I felt a sudden change. It was subtile yet distinct. I was wondering if this was placebo or not. The next hour or so was quite uneventful. I smoked some weed on my balcony and went back in by the computer; youtube. Watching old BF3 sketches was very fun. Actually at this point everything started to become very funny.

I went on giggling for minutes on end. Every joke in the video struck me. As I was trying to gather myself from the latest laughing attack the screen suddenly vibrated. All the lines became squiggly just like I'd expect. It looked very real. The more I looked at it the more it begun to wave around. I stood up and walked around my apartment for a bit - everything was getting very swirly and I couldn't look at anything for too long or else it swirled beyond recognition. But it was fine, I was happy about it, intrigued to see how everything around me started to morph.

I remember feeling cold over my skin and it felt so intense and interesting. I pinpointed in my mind the exact feeling of it against my skin and felt it shower over me. Every sensory input was just magic. I also felt like I was the same as the wood my bed was made out of, or any other material.

Every sensory input was just magic. I also felt like I was the same as the wood my bed was made out of, or any other material.

I put on some music on my wireless headset and blasted away. It was a generic summer music mix on youtube with some half naked girl on the thumbnail. I watched as she danced for me on the screen knowing full well I was watching a still picture. I walked around my place some more and at this point it felt like the world was updating once ever second or so, like watching a series of pictures in succession, but yet with a very smooth transition between the images. The music wasn't doing too much yet though.

Now, at this point everything was moving and frankly I couldn't even tell if it was supposed to or not. I had frequent laughing attacks and a moderate euphoric state while I explored my apartment looking at things, wondering about my own interesting ideas.

Then it happened, I closed my eyes and in a split second orbs of light were swirling around my body, falling towards my center. As the focal point of energy became my chest the most euphoric feeling I've ever experienced washed over me. It was a lucid light euphoria, burning like a bright sun in my chest. I let a few tears of joy run down my cheeks. Everything was in unity. Everything could be channeled through me.

The music was causing my senses to change, music had color and it would create vivid visual distortions. My eyelids felt like flintlock hammers, closing in an explosion of colors sparking patterns of bright neon '8-bit' bricks that washed over the peripheral of my eyes in all the colors of the rainbow.

Again I entered the euphoric state I was in before, the anticipation had me giggle like a small girl as the universe aligned itself to channel its energy through me. I closed my eyes, orbs, collision, light, everything. My body felt elevated as I floated through the room, at my fingertips I could choose to enter a more euphoric state at will. I felt in total control. Tears of joy fell on my face. I could see something beautiful.

At around 12 I was coming down a bit. The euphoria had settled a bit and I decided to try and do something. My computer screen was swirling so much I couldn't operate it. And it felt extremely weird using something with my hands. Like they were cold and dead.

As I sat by the computer trying to figure something to do I watched the girl on the summer playlist video thumbnail. Suddenly everything went dark, the pleasant picture of a young woman turned into a witch and a dark fog shrouded my periphery. I was a bit startled by this and tried to reach for the mouse to change the music. My hand looked sick, morphing into a green/purple disgusting extremity. I realised what was going on, stood up and walked into another room. It helped immediately (thanks internet!).

The come down was annoying. The euphoria only lasted for the first few hours and then I was stuck in a very vividly morphing world while being relatively normal. It wasn't all bad, but at some point I would have wanted to watch a movie or something but I really couldn't see a thing.

Comparing it to MDMA, it was much more intense. The euphoria is on another level. It felt more unstable, lasted considerably shorter and needed a lot more work to get there though while MDMA is just a sure ticket to happiness. It felt like an effort going through the LSD trip, like I had to remain vigilant and on guard. Absolutely worth it though.

Exp Year: 2018	ExpID: 111654

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 24

Published: Sep 12, 2018	Views: 781

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LSD (2) : General (1), Glowing Experiences (4), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 10 hits

		 LSD

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   135 lb

[Erowid Note:
The dose described in this report is very high, potentially beyond Erowid's 'heavy' range, and could pose serious health risks or result in unwanted, extreme effects. Sometimes extremely high doses reported are errors rather than actual doses used.]

After about 35 minutes I was experiencing and intensity I have never felt before.  When I saw the frame of the house that was being built bending in pinching itself until either sides touched, I knew I may have done something wrong.  Going inside to my room with three other friends to listen to music the intensity was increasingly more more and overwhelming the more I recognized it.  As we go inside we turn on the music, we all lie down to stare at my painted ceiling and walls with glow in the dark stars all over the room.  Everything I had seen was roughly normal considering I had only eaten at most 3 hits at one time until this.  Again, everything was about normal until I peaked.

The stars that covered the ceiling had suddenly transformed into a full three dimensional reality and I was in the middle of it...naturally.  Some of the stars advanced towards me, some of the stars fell into the ceiling going further and further away.  And some seemed to just wiggle around where they were.  And then I noticed what the strobe light was doing to the painted ceiling and walls.

The walls and ceiling were all colorful graffiti style words going up the walls and into the ceiling and down again, so this became very interesting.  When the strobe light was out all there seemed to be was an infinite sea of stars I was easily lost in.  When the light flashed, words crawled out of the walls and onto the ceiling which in turn melted of the ceiling and back onto the walls.  Then it was dark...nothing but stars...again a flash and the words crawled all over the room in increasingly more and more undescribable fashions.  Then I noticed the ceiling fan.

The ceiling fan had one red L.E.D. light attached to each of the blades.  However, when the strobe light have seemed to stop the fan, the blades stood motionless and wavingly pointed to the floor and drifted back up again.  To each still and bending fan blade three red planetlike orbs with clouds spewing off of them rotated and circled each fan blade.  By this time I felt I chould maybe close my eyes....this is getting to be a bit more than I had anticipated.

When I close my eyes...it doesn't work.  My eyelids were like clear glass.  When they were shut, it was as if they were still open.  The light flashed, the words crawled, the room darked, the stars shined, the fan melting the orbs circling, my mind....BLOODY SHATTERED!

By this time I stand up to leave the room, as I advance towards the door ivy grew into my way reaching out with leaves unfolding.  Knowing they were no arms of ivy growing at unheard of rates in my room I press on and walk right through the things.  I reach my red door which had a white cross on it with a mirror and the word 'lazy' written in small font underneath.  Below the large cross is written 'life ends sometime' also in white.  I stumble through the ivy and reach the door where I stop dead in my tracks and look on in absolute...shock.  I say 'hell with it I gotta get outa here.' And open the door.

I walk into a white and gold house with glowing golds fading into shining whites and shadows crawling as i make my way to the bathroom to splash water in my face.  I turn on the rainbows, I mean the bathroom light, with sink water I splash it onto my face.  I open my eyes and watch my face bubble like pasta sauce with my meatball eye falling off my chin. 'I need to lay down.'

So I lay down and for what I recall to be about forty minutes with my eyes closed were a tree, a human, and the planet.  First the tree grew out of the muddy ground, decayed, then fell the the earth.  This cycled repeatingly over and over again until the human appeared.  The human rose out of the muddy ground, decayed and fell back in.  This repeated for who knows how long until the planet happened.  The planet was going around the sun, zooming in quickly to make the continents visible the continents swirled all over the planet running into each other still zooming in to watch a mountain form.  Then rain clouds formed over the mountain falling as rain melting the mountain back into the ground.  This repeated itself for who knows how long.  Thinking maybe nap time was over I went outside.

Outside I watched the moon fall behind a hill.  Behind the hill shone a bright and powerful white light.  The white light turned and came down the hill as car head lights. The head lights lifted off the road and beacame stars in the sky.  The trees were all dragons flapping their wings and swimming through the world.  While the boards on the porch were shrinking and stretching beneath my feet.  And thats about all I remember.

I never experienced any visitations this night.  No real intense revelation to change my perception.  No enhanced powers of creativity or ideas.  It was simply souping around and I was an observer....in the middle of it all naturally.  Things were strange and everything was a picture.  A picture that was transformed in every single way you could imagine.  When I started to come down, I looked at a clock and realized this had gone on for 22 hours and I had not eaten.  So in an intense after trip 'shower period' where everything is lovely and everything is one mystifying.  I had breakfast, which turned out to be a mix of vegetables in my Mom's home made soup.

Exp Year: 2006	ExpID: 56804

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Sep 12, 2018	Views: 965

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LSD (2) : Alone (16), General (1)


		 DOSE:

		 oral
		 LSD

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   157 lb

I usually take LSD when I have big questions about life and myself, last year I had made some huge changes after taking LSD that it positively affected my life. So one Friday night I decided to consult with what I call 'The LSD Gods' (great name am I right?). I took 250 ugs at 4:30 pm and went downstairs with my mother to watch the rest of the movie called 'Lucy' while waiting for the LSD to kick in. All in all my mood at that point was really good.

Close to the end of the movie I started to feel the body effects LSD usually gives me so at 6:30pm I decided to go take a bath and use my new bath bomb I got. It was probably the best bath I had ever taken, I lifted the bath bomb out the water and watched the bubbles for a long time. By this time I was seeing small visuals and got out the bath. At 7pm I ended up laying down and watching YouTube videos of soap cutting (yes soap cutting I know) after a while I decided to ask my mom to take me to the gas station for a drink. As I got into the car the visuals and body effects kicked in a lot harder. I've never been in a car on my come up so it was really different. We got what we needed and headed home, mind you my mom has no idea I am tripping at this point. In the car for some unknown reason I wanted to laugh but I knew my mom would ask what's funny so I tried to turn the other way and hold it in but tears came to my eyes and she ended up asking what's wrong. Now me and my mom don't have the best relationship and I have been trying to mend it so all of the sudden I start thinking about that and go into full blown crying and start talking to her about our relationship.

We got home and I asked if we could sit outside for a few because I really wanted to talk more with my mom.

I asked if we could sit outside for a few because I really wanted to talk more with my mom.

 We ended up talking in a full blown 2 hour conversation and looking back I feel like it was so helpful to our relationship and my understanding of our relationship. At this point I'm just staring at the brick walkway we have and seeing so many patterns in it (mind you my mom still and as I'm writing this doesn't know I was tripping) I got a call from my work saying I needed to come in which was really sucky because I wasn't going to get sleep that night but after I ended the call, I then for some reason really want to go on a walk seeing as we live in basically the middle of nowhere (we don't really have signal except 1 bar so unless we have wifi we don't get calls on our cell phone until we go about 20 minutes away from where we live). So here me and my mom are walking (I also didn't feel out of breath at all like I normally do with my asthma) and it was so enjoyable that I didn't even realize we were walking as far as we did. We eventually got back home around 8 pm and I went up to my room for the night.

I didn't really do much after that because I felt so emotionally drained in a sense when talking to my mom and felt like I got out what I needed to say but never could with my mom. For the rest of the night I was though in a really good mood and watched my favorite tv show Wynonna Earp (That episode was a really weird one too where everyone was under a spell and I thought it might make me go into a bad trip but it didn't which was good because I really enjoyed the episode.) and really just listened to music and was on Facebook looking at videos. I did decide at 11 pm to take another bath (I love baths) and realized my jaw started to really hurt from clenching it subconsciously. I also (which yes I am still kinda afraid of the dark) wasn't afraid of walking in the dark back to my room and even days after I still wasn't afraid.

I went back into my room and watched more videos by PsychedSubstance and documentaries by Vox, Vice, etc. (I really like learning a lot more when I'm high or tripping but I also like learning things when I'm not high or tripping either). I then started to worry about not getting sleep before a 8 hour shift at 11 am but I wasn't worried with anxiety like I usually am.

Around 4 am I shut all the lights out and tried to sleep which to no avail I didn't sleep. I did however see a lot more visuals in the dark but my body and jaw hurt to the point where I took a bath with epsom salt. It still didn't work so I decided to wait till 8 am to call in sick because there was just no way as I already felt so tired but couldn't sleep due to the LSD. After laying for what felt like an eternity I finally fell asleep.

I had some really weird dreams but don't remember what happened in them, I just woke up really confused about what happened in them. I ended up sleeping till 10 pm and my mom thought I was sick (nope mom just tired from the LSD) but I ended up feeling some positives from the trip. My severe anxiety which causes me to have panic attacks daily was almost COMPLETELY gone. I also had some really good insight on my relationships with people and contacted them to try and fix the damage I had done in the past. I had better self-esteem about myself, and I also noticed that I haven't been eating as much or more like I get full quicker but I don't know if that's just the after effects of the LSD (even though it didn't happen last time when I took more).

All in all this trip has given me a lot of positive outlooks on my life and I am glad I made the decision to take LSD that Friday night.

Exp Year: 2018	ExpID: 112301

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: 17

Published: Sep 14, 2018	Views: 1,031

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LSD (2) : Families (41), Relationships (44), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), General (1), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 2 tablets
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

It was the first month of my freshman year of college and I had ended up with a roommate, Evan, with whom I got along extremely well. We both listened to Phish and the Grateful Dead, we both liked smoking pot and we had both tripped at least a few times before. He told me that the first time he tripped changed his life significantly for the better; he lost weight, stopped playing World of Warcraft, and started living in a much healthier way. I had tripped before at a concert but I didn’t have any revelations, just some intense visuals while listening to the music. We decided that the two of us as well as our friend Madeline would go to a gigantic local park with nature areas and trip together as a way to inaugurate our first year at school.

We took our acid sitting on a bench on campus, two hits each on paper squares about a centimeter square in size. Smiling with excitement, we mounted our bikes and set off for the park, which was about a fifteen-minute ride away. By the time we reached the center of the park, about 25 minutes later, I could feel an incredible feeling in my chest. The only way Evan and I could verbalize it was that we were feeling “potential”. My surroundings gradually started to look more and more colorful and I could see the sun starting to cast alpenglow on Mt. Rainier as we approached sunset. When a deer and a peacock simultaneously approached our group to within 10 feet, sending us into a state of silent awe, I knew we were starting to trip really hard.

We decided to go further into the park as the sun started to set. It was darker in the woods, but we were explorers in a strange land and were unafraid. We sat down in a clearing far off the path, completely surrounded by trees, and took another tab each. I started pouring dirt all over myself because I had realized that there is nothing inherently wrong with being dirty, it’s just a perception we’ve developed living in American society.

We sat down in a clearing far off the path, completely surrounded by trees, and took another tab each. I started pouring dirt all over myself because I had realized that there is nothing inherently wrong with being dirty, it’s just a perception we’ve developed living in American society.

 We reached a parking lot and I laid down on the ground and put on my headphones. I listened to the Doors’ American Prayer album, a collection of poetry set to music, and watched new constellations appear in the sky and swirl around like a whirlpool. I could feel an incredible energy in all parts of my body. I couldn’t speak except to make weird moaning noises. I was awestruck, overcome with the beauty of this planet. I felt what I can only describe as a deep, profound love for Earth and all that resides on it.

Later that night, when we returned to the dorms, I was coming down but could still feel the effects somewhat. I felt a powerful need to communicate the revelation that I had, that every human being is valuable and deserves to be loved. “The only real sin is harming another human”, I said. I would say to strangers I met, “I don’t know you, but I love and respect you, and I’m glad we exist in the same universe.” <pullquote>I couldn’t help but feel such profound love for every human I encountered that it almost moved me to tears.

I felt that I had found the key to the archetypal religious experience. I was thoroughly convinced that God resides in our own self-awareness. The thing we’ve been searching for since the dawn of time is really ourselves, we just haven’t realized it yet. I came to terms with how short and insignificant our lives are, and rather than a depressing thought, it was quite comforting to know that my own life is miniscule in comparison with the human race and this planet.

Since this trip I have continued to feel differently. I am much more spiritual than I was before. I can still feel the deep love for every human being and I have adopted as my philosophy the words of a Moody Blues song: “Love everybody and make them your friend.” I have made an effort to treat every person I meet with respect and to make them feel as if I am glad to be with them. While I do not advocate the use of LSD to anyone who is not themselves sure of their desire to use it, I believe it can be a tool to significantly improve one’s life. It is a big decision, but I feel exponentially more mature and wiser since tripping. I’ve stopped drinking and smoking cigarettes, which hold no appeal for me anymore. All in all, my acid experience was among the best things ever to happen to me.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 81980

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 18

Published: Sep 16, 2018	Views: 819

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LSD (2) : General (1), Glowing Experiences (4), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Various (28)

</pullquote>


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 0:10
		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 0:20
		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   175 lb

It was a day like any other, my friends and I were just sitting around and had nothing to do, in an attempt to buy marijuana the dealer had just ran out, but he had acid for sale for 8$ a tab. My whole life I had been curious to try acid, I always wanted to know what it was like to hallicinate.  The other friends thought it was a bad idea, so they left, leaving me and my other good friend who was also interested.  We bought 6 tabs then went back to his house.

8:30pm : my friend and I decide to drop 1 tab, just by placing it on the tongue and letting it disolve for about 10 minutes then swallowing, we repeated this process till the tabs were gone and we each had 3

9:00pm : I dont want to say I was feeling anything yet, but I was definitly feeling different, very relaxed and light headed

9:30pm : something strange was definitly happening now, it felt like my body was a bit floaty and felt oddly like jello

10:00pm : at this point the body jello feeling grew more intense and my friend and I could not stop laughing at everything, just laughing histarically, mild rushes of euphoria.

10:30pm : this is when the first visuals started kicking in with trails on lights, and the feelings of euphoria had grown more intense, and the jello feeling was still present, could not have a normal conversation without losing train of thought

11:00pm :Everything just seemed to make sense, no matter what I talked about, it looped around and came right back plugging itself into the most random outcomes

Everything just seemed to make sense, no matter what I talked about, it looped around and came right back plugging itself into the most random outcomes

, I couldnt stop smiling, and at this point the hallucinations were really intense, things would bubble when I looked at them, and my friends face would morph around and I would start laughing because of how funny it looked, we decided to take a walk through a local park and everything in my vision was bending and comming at me, and as I walked by things they had huge trails on them, everything looked intense

11:30pm : everything in my vision would now bend sideways and things would drift around, I hallucinated a tree that wasnt there, the night sky looked absolutely amazing, and I could not catagorize how I felt at this point

12:00am : we decided to walk back to his house, noticing that time took forever, as to what seemed like hours had only been 15 minutes, the jello feeling was not as intense, and the visuals sort of dimmed down a bit, but things were still funny and morphing

12:30am : it strangely felt like I was peaking again when I thought I had already peaked because I then got another rush of hallucinations, only this time, I could taste textures in my mouth that werent there, and I could see what I was listening too

2:30am : everything from 12:30 had continued until this point, where things gradually grew less intense, the body high feeling had mellowed down to just a slightly floaty feeling, objects seemed like they were on their own dimensions and different different ways form each other

3:00am : just sitting up late at night watching random things on youtube, everything was still changing colors and peoples faces were morphing around, I felt very relaxed and content at this point, though if I were to try and sleep, it would be impossible

Throughout the night the hallucinations would come and go but slowly and slowly getting less intense, thought process was a bit easier, and eventually at 9am the next day, I had gotten some sleep and slept through the whole day, I awoke sometime the next night, and felt completely fine

I would have to say that LSD defintly blows my mind, and it opened new doors in myself. In the future I wil definitly try it again.

Anyway hope you liked my report

Peace

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 88696

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 15

Published: Sep 21, 2018	Views: 977

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LSD (2) : General (1), First Times (2), Glowing Experiences (4), Small Group (2-9) (17)