		 DOSE:

		 3 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (liquid)

		   repeated
		 inhaled
		 Nitrous Oxide
		 (gas)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   210 lb

I would say that I am a fairly experienced psychedelic experimenter.  As a rule, I try to experience these chemical compounds with as much of an open mind as possible.  One night a few years ago I had a friend fill up a 15 pound tank of nitrous oxide.  It happed to be that I had plenty of L.S.D. and decided that I would combine the two and see what would transpire.

I was alone this evening. Early on, within about 20 minutes, I could tell this would be one of those trips that make me really enjoy and makes me marvel at the psychedelic experience.  I had a very large custom bed and I laid at an incline on it all night.  Throughout the evening I was consuming very large, 25-30 inch balloons every 10-15 minutes.  I have a large lung capacity and a knack for holding my breath underwater for a long time so I was getting a great deal of gas in my system during the experience.   Generally, in these types of trips I find myself floating at about 20-30 miles above the earth.  When I keep the gas coming into my system I stay floating in this unusual realm.  When I have to fill up a balloon it’s like I’m reaching down through the atmosphere to do so.  I wouldn’t say that this feeling is exactly like being an astronaut it’s more like my subconscious and conscious mind are both meeting in that approximate location.

I’m not sure why, but I almost always find myself in near outer space. Sometimes, my mind leaves the earth’s gravitational pull and sometimes it skips along the earth’s surface.  This night, I was having a much more intense experience then others (I suspect partially because I had fasted for a couple of days before I ingested the L.S.D.).  Whatever the case, the visual experience was much stronger than I had ever seen before. I would hover around the sun, head off into deep space, and walk on moons of other planets.  I didn’t have to close my eyes or focus on anything to have these hallucinations.  Once the Nitrous Oxide was saturated in my bloodstream the visions took over and I wouldn’t even see the room I was in at the time.

So I'm guessing about 90 or so minutes into the experiment I had that magical trip, that one that leaves you bauling your eyes out, you’re crying tears of joy and a left with profound appreciation and understanding of the universe.  Basically, after a very deep and long inhale of a balloon and then another I reached what one might call “nirvana”.  Essentially, my subconscious mind traveled up this stream of blue light at what I could only describe as light speed or warp speed or 200,000 miles a second.  Insanely fast.  Only it wasn’t a stream of blue light.  The light beam wasn’t a beam at all it was a crystal matrix that was true crystalline in form, the crystals were of symbols and patterns.  When I reached the inner core to this white-blue light (lets say it took a half second) I could sense this crystalline code stretched out for hundreds, maybe thousands of miles in all directions.  The crazy thing was.  All of this code made complete sense.  In any direction I focused, all of the code lined up and solved itself.  In an instant 500,000 foreign characters simultaneously made complete sense.  I don’t know how it did.  But believe me it did.

I know this sounds crazy but I felt that I had seen the back end code to the entire universe and not only seen it but was temporarily given the brainpower to comprehend and appreciate it.  This was by far not my typical L.S.D. experience.  I did not just see things. I guess I would say that I temporarily understood some crazy complex alien or cosmic code. I count my blessings often that I was able to have that experience.

I count my blessings often that I was able to have that experience.

  After this experience I don’t fear death or the future for that matter.  It forced me to realize that there is so much more beyond our existence.  Something incredible is out there, or inside of ourselves.

Within about 12-16 seconds I came back from that experience floating again above the earth.  My L.S.D. experience had just turned from an 8 to an 8000 in a few seconds and then back again.  Those who have had similar experiences know what I am talking about.  Those who think that all drugs are bad and evil shouldn’t knock what they don’t understand.   I don’t want this to come off corny but I do believe in some form of God.  I don’t put stock in what most organized religions say to believe in.  But I do believe that there has to be some sort of higher power.  I am not God.  But this experience truly felt like I got to read God’s diary for about 15 seconds.  I didn’t retain any of the cheat codes, or figure out how to win the lottery or anything like that.  But there was one thing that did come back with me, that UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, is the most powerful force in the Universe.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 87417

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 35

Published: Dec 7, 2018	Views: 1,971

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Nitrous Oxide (40), LSD (2) : Glowing Experiences (4), Mystical Experiences (9), Combinations (3), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		   repeated
		 insufflated
		 Ketamine
		 (powder / crystals)

		   T+ 0:00
		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 0:00
		 0.5 hits
		 sublingual
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 1:30
		 1 hit
		 sublingual
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 7:00

		 oral
		 Alcohol - Beer/Wine

		   T+ 7:00
		 21 mg
		 oral
		 Melatonin

		   T+ 9:00
		 6 mg
		 oral
		 Melatonin

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   170 lb

Compounds/drugs dosed:

Ketamine HCL, Insufflated, dosing frequently throughout the day.  I consumed about 1.2-1.5 grams throughout the day.

Cannabis, smoked, repeated.

LSD[blotter], sublingual, .5 hits, then 1 hit.

Subject: 19 year old male, 170 pounds.

Occupation: Student, Artist, Musician.

Background:

I’ve been taking psychedelics for years and love them almost as much as they intrigue me. I normally prefer the shorter acting compounds. List of psychedelics I’ve taken follows:  Psilocybe Mushrooms, DMT, DPT [http://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=7976643], 5-meo-dmt, 4-aco-dmt, 2c-b, 2c-c, 2c-e, 2c-I, 2c-t-2, San Pedro Cactus Tea [1 threshold dose], LSD [less than 10 times], LSA, Salvia divinorum, Cannabis/Hashish, DXM, Ketamine, mda, mdma, bk-mdma, 4-mmc.  I was dependant upon oxycodone for 6 months [well over a year ago], and was taking prescribed stimulants for ADHD in my mid teen years.

Set:  Mid October. My friend’s house…which is a rented mansion filled with a bunch of my close friends.

Mindset: Less than perfect…I’d been arguing with my girlfriend earlier in the day and had been doing ketamine most of the day.

I’d been arguing with my girlfriend earlier in the day and had been doing ketamine most of the day.

  I bought a new bong [I don’t smoke much weed, and since I was also on ketamine the effects of both were amplified].  So I was stoned/k’d to the point of hallucinating in the early afternoon.

10:45pm:

Had been doing ketamine most of the day, split a blotter with my friend...she had tripped the night before, and was a bit more enthusiastic than I was.

11:45:

Starting to trip a little, but it's mild...someone told me that he thinks the acid might of degraded a bit [everybody else said it was REALLY good still]. I do a bit more ket with some friends and listen to close to the edge.

12:15:

My friend runs off and does her own thing for a while and a bunch of my other friends are on a candy flip [Lsd+mdma], and most of us were doing ketamine as well. I decided a half wasn't enough [it really was though] so I buy another...no one wants to split it with me, so I eat the whole thing [fffuuuccckkk].

1:00:

I do some more K, kick it with my friends, and realize I'm having the fucking time of my life. It's been something like 2 years since I've taken a full dose of lsd, and I'm loving it..this is when things start to get hazy...

2:18:

Weird time line...most of the time lsd comes on all the way for me within an hour or so, but I'm finally starting to actually peak. My visuals are mild blowing. Patterns in everything. Intense fractals. I start to get a bit wound up because I'm coming down off of the K, so I do some more. As I go into the bathroom, I realize that I am FUCKING GONE. I feel like the whole experience is a dmt vision and I could come out of it any minute. I talk to my girlfriend [we had been arguing earlier] and she's not too happy about all of the k I've been doing lately, so she's pretty pissed about the fact that I decided to drop acid on a whim.

~3:00:

I talk to my friend and she is FUCKING GONE off of half a hit. My other friend [he does a lot of acid and had already dosed like 3 times that day and is on about hour 16] and he tells me that on 2 of these blotters he felt like he tripped harder than on 6 a week earlier.. I think it's weird. Another friend [he's on one] told me that he is out of his mind. This acid just gets you 'there' we all thought...no matter how much you take.. I still can't believe I took 1.5...

We come to the general consensus that this acid may have been laid on blotter improperly, because some hits feel like 70 mics, and some feel more like 250. I love don caballero...the music is my fucking savior.

~4:00:

I'm still GONE.. I feel like I'm still coming up.. I don't like the long duration of lsd 'I'm sticking to short acting tryptamines and the shorter acting 2c-x's from now on..'. We watch nightmare before Christmas and smoke some weed. I am dissolving into fractals...I’m starting to slip away into obscurity.

I look in the mirror; extreme pupil dilation. See the same acrobats in the thin strip of my iris.. I feel that doing some more k might help level out the acid [.. I know, right?].

~5:00:

...shit hits the fan...I'm WAY too high, and my friend [he was rolling and on a lot of K] thought I had come down, and made a 'haha, you're perma-fried joke'.. I start to think I'm never coming down, but tell myself I’ll be fine.  I am under the impression that as soon as the sun came up I would be sober.

I’m freaking out.. I make my girlfriend drive over [she's the fucking best], we hang out for a while, and I have her go home with me...she’s pissed off that she has to come save me.

5:45:

Laying in bed, I drank a bottle of wine, and pop seven 3mg melatonin.. I put on the Simpson’s movie [I needed something mindless] and I’m still absolutely gone...I’m stuck in a loop. I feel like I’m experiencing my own death and rebirth every 30 seconds or so...EVERYTHING is dissolving and reconstituting. I’m horrified because the tv is spitting out nothing but gibberish...I’m seeing in frames...

The movie ends and I’m able to put on Half baked.. I pop 2 more melatonin...still stuck..

I woke up at 12:00 the next morning, still having mild visuals, Smiling ear to ear. I feel like the phoenix...what an intense trip.  I still feel like I shouldn’t have survived something that intense, but I did. I talk to my friends, and tell them that it was intense, and that I love them all for being there for me. I truly feel that this was a ++++ experience, and both a blessing and curse. It put a lot of personal matters in perspective.

I felt altered throughout the next day, and upon typing up the outline of events [2 days later] I still don't quite feel normal...shorter attention span than normal.

[2 days later] I still don't quite feel normal...shorter attention span than normal.

After thoughts:

I was later told that the doses that I had taken were from the “washout” corner [the sheet is dipped in liquid lsd, and drained…this corner was the corner that was on the bottom, and these doses were [apparently] much more powerful].

I had been tripping frequently all summer [though hadn’t taken a full dose of lsd in about a year].  I felt strong after effects for a few days, and didn’t feel “normal” again for another week or so.

About ketamine not synergizing with psychedelics like lsd… this is QUITE FRANKLY NOT THE CASE.  This is a very powerful combination that I personally wasn’t ready for.  Others have tried it with lower doses of ketamine and loved it.  If I could have changed anything, I would have waited until after eating the lsd to start taking ketamine. I would at least have both feet on the ground before I ate the lsd.

After this trip, I decided it would be best for me to lay off of Psychedelics for a while.  Since then I’ve tripped once [a low dose of 2c-c] in late December, and had a wonderful, positive experience.

Be careful with this combo.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 83030

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 19

Published: Dec 10, 2018	Views: 1,182

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Ketamine (31), LSD (2) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Combinations (3)


		 DOSE:

		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 50 mg
		 oral
		 Cannabis - Hash
		 (edible / food)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

“Puke with sparkles”

This was definitely what they call a Learning Experience.

I have been curious for a little while now about the combination of LSD and edible hash.  My experiences with each alone over the past year have been excellent, so what could be better than a synergy of two good things?  But things don’t always go as intended.

The plan was to trip in the bedroom in darkness which would be a new experience for me (my previous experiences had been outdoors in daylight). I took one tab of road-tested LSD plus some home-made chocolate containing about 1/20th of a gram of Moroccan soft dark brown hash. It may not sound like much but I have also road-tested this hash and it is potent stuff. From experience I knew that this amount of hash would be enough for a three-hour medium high.

T zero was 2300 hours. This was to be a night-time journey.

The good

I had always thought that CEVs were the poor relation of OEV: something one gets with low quality / low dose acid that isn’t potent enough to generate “proper” visuals. Well now I know better. Once things got going at about T+2, I lay on the bed with my eyes closed and the room darkened. The result was spectacular. I cannot recall the detail but I saw a multitude of glittering colours and a sense of intense hyper-realism. It was as though I had borrowed the visual cortex of an eagle. The resolution, detail and chromacity (if there is such a word) of the visual impressions was quite remarkable. Equally remarkable was the sense that this was not just an illusion but that I was actually seeing - just without the need to use my eyes. I had no desire to open my eyes. Nothing in my rather dull bedroom was going to compare with this.  To add to the effect, I had a sense of intense surround-sound hearing even without any music or other sounds. It was not that I was hearing things that were not there. It was more that the tiny whispers of sound in an otherwise quiet room became symphonic in depth and intensity. This was an experience in the nature of psychedelic perception and raised for me some fascinating philosophical questions as to the nature of “real” perception and how the mind creates sensory impressions. Yes of course it was all just chemicals, but that is hardly an explanation, merely a restatement of the question.

The bad

That evening I had had an excellent supper of roasted cauliflower and potato followed by some fine gruyere cheese with cucumber, topped off with fruit yoghurt. For some reason, though, when I ate the hash chocolate the cannabis flavour left a nasty aftertaste. Too strong and too hashy. Like a combination of burnt coffee and too much chocolate.

About two hours into the trip, things started to take a bad turn. My mind began racing in a way that was not pleasant and hard to control. I began to feel claustrophobic. Opening the windows did not really help. I tried playing music but that didn’t help either.

Soon I began to feel actively unwell (I may have felt unwell earlier and just not acknowledged it – but now it was inescapable). The sensation grew into one of actual nausea. I stumbled into the bathroom. Shortly afterwards (maybe T + 2.5), the puking began. And what puking. At least three, maybe more, bouts of deep stomach emptying vomits spaced over what seemed like hours. The acid was in full flow so whilst I was racked by nausea and bouts of vomiting, I was still seeing gorgeous multi-coloured sparkles.  What a waste.

This was not an Ayahuasca style cleansing purge. This was more like tripping with norovirus. Eventually at about 5am (T+6) I stumbled back into bed with the trip subsiding and managed to get to sleep. I woke at about 8.30am (T+9.5) feeling weak and tired but otherwise more or less back to normal.

Conclusion

It is hard to know exactly what caused this to go bad after such a promising start but the obvious culprit is the combination of a full stomach and the addition of the hash. Once previously in Amsterdam I smoked too much cannabis and ended up puking my guts out.  This time the amount of hash was not an issue (I have taken the same amount from the same batch quite a few times with no gastric issues whatever) but I think my body just cannot tolerate LSD and hash on a heavy stomach. With hindsight the nasty aftertaste from the hash chocolate was a clear warning.

Also, I get the feeling that the hash put my mind into overdrive which is a problem when confined to a small room at night with no prospect of sleep for many hours and nowhere to go.  <pullquote>There were a few moments when I genuinely thought to myself “what the fuck is the point of this?  Never again”.

Fortunately the human mind is very good at blocking out the bad and focusing on the good.</pullquote> This was not a bad LSD trip in the traditional sense. The pure LSD element was stunningly beautiful. But the simple lesson is that if I don’t feel physically well then no trip is going to be enjoyable.  There is no pleasure to be had in recreational puking, even if the puke comes with sparkles.

Lessons

:

1.	LSD with eyes closed/darkness is beautiful.

2.	Empty stomach not full stomach.

3.	Don’t mix acid and hash at the outset. Acid first. Then maybe  top up with hash only after a few hours and once the trip is well-established and going nicely.

4.	Outside not inside. Choose a warm day in a safe secure natural environment where there is space to move around.

Peace and good tripping

H

Exp Year: 2018	ExpID: 112687

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 50

Published: Dec 17, 2018	Views: 1,600

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LSD (2), Cannabis - Hash (93) : Difficult Experiences (5), Combinations (3), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   130 lb

I was 16 years old at the time of this trip. My friend, let's call her Q, was my trip sitter, although she helped none at all, really. Her brother just sort of gave me a tab of acid. Although many believe it is an idiotic decision to take psychedelics at such a young age, I have been very interested in psychedelics for the past few years. I regularly smoke marijuana, along with occasionally getting drunk. So I figured since I have a bit of experience with an altered state of mind, I should have faith in my ability to handle myself on LSD. Now, this was about a month ago, but I still remember the events that took place.

Q was trying to pressure me out of taking the tab for a week prior. She had recently stopped using marijuana and made it an oath to stop being interested in drugs all together. But once I assured her I'm taking it, she agreed to be my sitter, a position which I suggested in case I needed someone to emotionally help me, or maybe even take me to a hospital if shit hit the fan.

The day came, I woke up at 5:30am. I was aware of how long the drug lasts, and wanted to have an all-day experience where I felt everything from the come up to the come down. However I never really felt myself sober--which I'll get into later.

I placed the tab under my tongue. Me and Q put coats on since it was like 45 degrees. I grabbed some mandarins and a couple water bottles, I planned to be at the park all day in an effort to avoid my parents. We head out to my nearby park - about a 5 minute walk. She pressured me into making a video stating if anything went wrong, shes not responsible. Something I thought was ridiculously selfish and idiotic, but knowing her, I did it anyway and forgot about it in an effort to not ruin my mood.

We arrived at the park. We sat on the swings and just talked a little. The tab was still under my tongue. I asked Q how long we had been there. She told me it had been an hour, I did not believe her--it felt like 5 minutes. Something I thought was odd. I didn't feel or see anything. We went onto the playground and sat on it. I stared at the bars for a bit, occasionally looking up at the sky. It was a lovely day, I love the cold. We talked about nothing in particular. Until I really felt... odd. It looked like the bars of the playground were stretching indefinitely. Q asked me if I was feeling it, and I told her what I saw. She nodded and that was it.

I was mesmerized by the bars, but pulled myself away from looking at them after like 10 minutes. I thought now was a decent time to swallow my tab. I like chewing on things so it was in my mouth for a while just being chewed up, hence why it took so long for me to swallow it. I looked at the sky and trees, they looked beautiful. Q said she was really cold and uncomfortable. I was in a completely awkward state, it was like my regular thought process and cynicality of my personality was gone. I stayed silent.

She suggested we walk along the sidewalk that goes around the park.

It was so outstandingly gorgeous. The cold and scenery was just breathtaking. A boring old park became a beautiful painting. I have heard that yellow-tinted glasses make everything better. Thankful for me, I have these transition glasses that I have to wear. They turn a dark yellow whenever intense light hits them. So everything was yellow tinged. We walked around, and I took off my glasses. It was.. disappointing. Other than my lack of clear sight, it was just a boring type of neutral color. So I decided I'd keep them on.

We then sat on the swings. I wanted to listen to Shpongle, and wow was it amazing. They stimulated my mind in all the right ways. It felt so... right.

Everything in the universe seemed like it fit exactly where it was, like a big puzzle.

The music was grand. It sounded metallic to me.

Q said she was "super super" cold, and wanted to go home. I dreaded that. The fear of having to face my parents while on acid terrified me. But I was also really digging Shpongle, and the fear went away when I played attention to the song I was listening to. For those who care, I Am You and The Sixth Revelation were my favorite songs at the time.

We walked home, and thankfully nobody was home. We lied on my bed for a good hour. I was just exploring music like Pink Floyd and more Shpongle. Although I love Pink Floyd, it didn't seem like my forté at that moment. It just didn't resonate with me. It still sounded decent, though. But nothing special like Shpongle.

Anyway, Q left suddenly. She said she was bored and gonna watch tv in the living room. She left her vape on the bed, though. I was chilling on the bed by myself, thinking about my personality and my ego. It was pretty chill. It was eye-opening as well. I came to terms with a lot of aspects of my personality.

Honestly, I felt like the shit. My ego was so high, I felt like I was smarter than everyone else and that I was so beautiful. Which I normally never, ever think of. It was nice to be confident in my existence rather than my regular self-deprecating state of mind.

It was nice to be confident in my existence rather than my regular self-deprecating state of mind.

Anyway, I decided to go to the living room to join Q. My sister came home, and I was making myself some ramen. I wasn't hungry but thought why not, I haven't eaten anything at all today. It was maybe 12 or 1pm by this point. She asked me a question about whether or not her oatmeal was cooked all the way. I thought that was the most absurd question ever that only a dummy would ask. I mean--just follow the directions. It's not like oats have salmonella. Now I realize it was a normal question, not in terms of safety but for taste. I was thinking with complete logic and no emotion. So I thought of it as "is it safe" rather than "is it pleasurable".

I normally take feelings into consideration, so that was different. She asked if I was stoned, I said no. That was the end of that.

I ate my ramen and watched tv for like an hour. The tv morphed still and it was like...I was out of body? I don't know how to explain it, I just saw the world with a type of different weird perspective that felt like I was watching my whole house at one time.

Eventually I went to my boyfriends house, and kicked him and his friends ass at For Honor, which is pretty funny considering I get very angry whenever I play videogames and just simply don't have the motivation or hand-eye coordination to play those games. This only fueled my ego. It was funny that I was better than everyone else for once. And I didn't get mad when I lost once or twice. So I noticed that big personality change.

Eventually I decided I was gonna sleep over at his house. By 10pm I was still hallucinating. His house was breathing, his wall decorations were swirling and stretching, but much less than they had at the park. I still felt... weird. Like an underlying grease of my high still remained. I was honestly scared that my trip would never end.

I was honestly scared that my trip would never end.

 I legitimately thought I would have that weird feeling of being high for the rest of my life since the high lasted so long. Turns out many people experience this, and it was just part of the come-down. Some people feel this way for another day. I was relieved.

The next day we went to Busch gardens. But I was just in such an awful mood. I thought that for such a relatively positive trip, I wouldn't feel so mentally agitated the next day.

So, in conclusion, my first trip was pretty chill. I know this was long, and I guess I went into unnecessary detail. But I loved reading long and in depth trip stories before my trip, they helped me the most in regards of knowing what I was getting into before I took that tab. I plan on taking a decent dose of Psilocybin very soon. I want to take a large enough dose so I can get rid of my ego completely, and see things in a different light once again.

Exp Year: 2017	ExpID: 110598

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: 16

Published: Dec 18, 2018	Views: 874

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LSD (2) : Music Discussion (22), First Times (2), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 LSD

		 Cannabis

It's been about a year and 3 months since I first dropped acid for the 1st time, shortly before my 20th birthday. One very very strange year during which I've been homeless (since before I ever got into entheogens), sketch-venturing with beautiful freaks in the laterals of society and consciousness and traveling across Canada 3 times, two of these 3 times by hitchhiking. A year of exploration, education and travel, physical and non, during which I've stepped through doors that lead to very strange places from which I didn't return the same. Among quite frequently smoking pot and experimenting some with other entheogens (a.k.a. Psychedelics) such as salvia, mushrooms and ketamine I've dropped acid 15-20 or so times. A report on one of these trips is 'alien morphonogenic babies in prayer'.

I must say first and foremost that LSD, among other entheogens including pot, turned out to be for me one of the most fascinating and effective tools for self-actualization, healing and insight. From a purely psychological perspective it can allow one to confront and undo years of neuroses and self-and-other-destructive beliefs and habits. It can also help trigger what some would call a mystical or magickal awareness that transcends dogma, for LSD has the power to cleanse the mind from the parasitic mind-fungus we call dogmas. As I put it in an email to a close friend a few months ago:

'Entheogens (especially LSD) show me the multitude of infinitely varying possibilities of perceiving/processing reality/self, which can be anything at all especially when u regard the experience with a relativistic set, altho I think they serve more to foster this very relativistic set especially in a western cosmopolitan context with it's abundance of information. There's no more easy way out of accepting some goofy doctrine of what reality is because I become open to the hyperweirdness of all, and I know any perception of reality is merely a perception. In other words, entheogens unbind my imagination. Make me so much more open minded and open ended. That is I make myself that, but these things are great boosters and facilitators of that. They can set a way point. They can give substance to the practice, give one a quick and adventurous and very experientialy real peak past the veil. They can big bang the spirit/mind, if only for relatively short lasting periods of time that can however be so profoundly impacting and determinant of the worldviews and values upheld. My personal experiences of such spirit/mind big bangs are what I call 'the unobstructed flights of the boundless spirit across infinity', the permanent evolution/transcendence towards which I consider to be 'that what matters most'. Needless to say, no description can capture even the vaguest feeling of what these experiences themselves are truly like.

Entheogens are an endless topic, there's so much to them, and the best thing is that I cannot pin anything down with them, can't say that they are precisely 'this' and do precisely 'that', which they show me to be true with just about anything. It's as if they are making the mind more fluid, syncing it up this way with reality which also seems to be more fluid than static. It's also the whole sensational nature of the experience that is attractive. The hardass intensity. The adventures into bizzaritude. This very much leaks over into their social context as well. The individuals who use entheogens as exploration ships more often than not seem to be of the eccentric and anarchic and adventurous kind. The beautiful freaks, and these are the ones I gravitate towards.'

I've explored this topic further in 2 short articles which were part of a little self-published magazine, copies of which I was selling on the streets of Vancouver a few months ago:

Don't Believe Anything part 1

My experience with entheogens (especially LSD) enabled me to have a degree of control over my mind, taught me that all my thought/perception/behavior patterns are mere conditioned imprints that can be altered, they showed me the deconditioned, untaught mind, the infinite mind. A mind as it truly is, my own and only my own, thus making it possible for me to choose for myself how I want to perceive and process reality. By doing something like that, you are only taking back what's rightfully yours, in fact the only thing that's rightfully yours, yourself, your freedom to shape your own thoughts and emotions and beliefs and behavior. This involves understanding societal conditioning in all it's bullshititude, ripping apart rigid thought patterns instilled by experience and other people, not being a slave to a mind that isn't even of your own making but rather being a master of a mind that is. A practice whereby ingesting an entheogen one activates a patternless synaptic firestorm, a firestorm out of which you can willingly form new lasting thought patterns. Healthy, empowering thought patterns, if such you choose, those that uphold freedom and compassion.

Such anarchy of one’s mind is the first step to self-empowerment, that which those who control you fear most, the next step being able to do the same with your flesh. That awkward unwieldy flesh, so frail. Willing it into transformation. Hacking the code of matter. Not being its slave either. Breaking and bending the laws of the matrix. And that of course is far more difficult. Yet it is the trick to live and die for. A soul takes on a physical form to, among other things, learn how to manipulate this form. It learns this through will. That will shall persevere. That will shall overcome.

Don't Believe Anything part 2

After much thought and research and some tripping too, it seems to me that every belief system that I've come across so far is a pale and primitive interpretation of reality, an ontological cartoon. The universe is way way whaaay weirder and more insanely complex and bizarre than we can conceive. I think that one is free to interpret reality however they choose. It matters not. What matters is what you do in this reality. How you interact with it. What tricks you can pull in it. Whether you create a happier, freer life for yourself and others. Therefore, I believe in transcending belief (paradoxical, isn’t it).

Any belief, any ideology, any set perspective on things is just that, and not the reality itself. By subjecting yourself to belief and ideology and set perspective you cut yourself off from the hyperweirdness of the universe. You put yourself into a very narrow viewpoint, a very thick filter of interpreting things, a very limited configuration of perception. You drastically reduce your mind's potential, removing other alternatives of the infinite variety of possible mental states. All systems of interpreting reality are at best incomplete if not totally ludicrous and must never be taken as truth but only be consciously used as tools when and if necessary.

I think no one knows what the fuck is truly going on. Those who claim they do, be very wary of. Thus to myself I say: imagine whatever you want, be completely free with your imagination and belief and all mental processes in general. What matters is the practical application, the consequences of these mental processes. Personally, I choose to be awed and inspired by how inconceivably weird everything is and not attach myself to any silly human cartoon of what reality is. Letting go of all these cartoons along with the ego causes one to be flooded by a stream that cannot be grasped. Immersed within that stream, centered yet dissolved, one is able to weave that which truly matters: transformation and empowerment of oneself and others. Immersed within that stream, focused yet receptive, one is able to make the most effective-efficient choices within the selection of choices available in each moment. Calm and fearless, such a person surfs the tidal wave of infinite complexity towards absolute freedom.

I'm going to wrap up this rant on a different topic and mood by talking about where I am at today as I'm going thru these profound changes of mind, personality and lifestyle catalyzed by the use of entheogens. I will do this by sharing an email I sent to my friends just yesterday:

Hey fellers! Quick word from melter. The hitchhiking journey from vancouver to montreal was a blast. Ten days on the road with all sorta beautiful freaks. Fukin madness fractal ultra-super-mega-sketch-speed-shlarfle through time/space, distorted. Went strait to allison's place and the next day we went to a rave 4 hours away from montreal. Maaaahsive supertrippy stage, a breathing spazzing bopping neonic creature of humans inside a supertech alien freak-temple that is bludgeoning with 144bpm megabase psy-trance the physica to reach the ufos out in hyperweirdness, a beacon calling out the aliens. There was also a small chill stage nearby at the bottom of a slope next to a beach, and a tent city around it all with superhi french and ontario freaks running around, and us (allison-melter) lsdilated kittens in the middle. I've been staying with allison since, watching southpark talking eating getting stoned doing uninnocent things going out places etc. We're planning to go to the gaspe, a place in quebec on the atlantic shore sometime soon. A few nights ago we went for a jam with allison's friends who have access to a full-on (yet sketchy ofcourse) recording studio and sang with 3 mikes with effects on while one guy was fuking around with loops on the computer/mixer. Yesterday went to a secretive unlicensed afterhours place above a garage nearby tonight. There were few people there however, at one point a drunk french guy stumbled onto the dance floor with a dog. Just finished some wall-painting in the house, listening to trippy music while eating the legendary montreal bagels, gonna smoke a joint soon.

Have been having many mystical experiences smoking pot especially since I got here, seen the first layer of my bio-electric filed (or aura) in full color several times now. Things are really intense on the (freak)head-space of things. Feel that restless will to trigger something alien to the monkey-mind, something that needs to explode out from within, sum sort of subtle super-frequency energy, the shockwave of which would affect places far weirder then this one. As if the inner-radiance is trying to burst out and with the power of this burst tear apart the locks of physical constants, releasing the inner-radiance of others as well. The unveiling. All this 2012 shit. Flaky-paranoid? Perhaps, but I'm trying to be as skeptical as I can at the same time, I think only the balance/fusion of the two can make one reasonable.

In a resent thc-inebriated moment of glory, I had this very intense thought that perhaps all this acceleration in technology and information that some believe will soon reach a crescendo could give us an ability to create a very special doorway of sorts. There are a lot of new age flakes who believe that in 2012 there's gonna be this planetary shift and aliens are gonna land and take our light bodies to a beautiful place and there will be peace and love forever blahblahblah. I being a reasonable person look at this sceptically of course, but I'm sure they're tapping into something big and weird and real around the corner nevertheless. I'm wondering if part of this big thing is that at our disposal there will be technology and information to create shortcuts to 'there'. Shortcuts in the sense of individual and universal quantum leaps from the sticky unmalleable fabric of dense form bound by consequences, devour-and-posses survival and pain-fear based experience into a state of disembodied consciousness capable of manifesting and unmenifesting an infinity of possibilities at it's will. Humanity already has technology to do miracles, literally, at this point. The problem is that the sick fuckers in power are hoarding it for war and dominance. I think this technology will be released and used in WW3, which at this point doesn't seem too unlikely and too far away. I'm wondering if this technology can be taken now and/or after the war and adopted and used to create shortcuts into full on physical transcendence. I don't think it's fair to even call them shortcuts, lets use the word passageways. Humanity and organic life in general has suffered harrowingly in physica for a very very long time now and now that we've come up with ways to bend and break laws of physics we have every right to rip apart these shackles, cut free from this anchor. The thing here is choice tho.

I doubt that it's just gonna happen like the new agies and other religious fanatics believe. We must make it happen. I'm wondering if it's possible to do that using all this technology in combination with the amassed databank of mystical/occult knowledge to create true, individual and universal, empirical, physical, concrete ruptures into hyperweirdness, or whatever other metaphor u prefer to use. No more prophets poets philosophers and all sorts of other wankers whose legacy instead of inspiring people to be free more often inspires twisted fucked up cults such as christianity and islam that end up devouring humanity. No more dogmas and chatter and high and mighty priests and gurus or any of that bullshit. Only the real thing now. Tangible doorways to heaven. The real fukin thing that is real on the most fundamental physical level. As a species, we've come this far, suffered this much, and it seems that we could very soon loose it all again. Again the ugly life of man's dark ages, again the cruel world of nature. Nononononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Better a  complete annihilation of all life on this planet than that. Yet I reserve my deepest hopes for something much better and more fantastic than any of us can ever imagine.

Love,

Melt

P.s. Don't worry, I'm about to spark up a joint and get my sense of humor back!

[Reported Substance: "focus on lsd and pot salvia, mushrooms and ketamine briefly mentioned as well"]

Exp Year: 2006	ExpID: 55433

Gender: Not Specified

Age at time of experience: 19

Published: Dec 26, 2018	Views: 900

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Cannabis (1), LSD (2) : Not Applicable (38), Retrospective / Summary (11)


		 DOSE:

		 5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD

		 40 mg
		 oral
		 Ketamine

		 300 mg
		 oral
		 Mescaline

		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Tobacco - Cigarettes

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   140 lb

Howdy, so here is the story of when I met Lucy.

It was a brisk fall evening when me and my friend hit up this kid for acid. He said he had acid, mescaline, and ketamine, we said fuck it and asked for a little of each. Who doesn't like a good hard trip into the unknown.

Now, a little back story on what has been going on in my life during this time.  I started the drug phase of my life when I was 14. It was first spice and coke. OD'd then I moved onto pills. Dad OD'd on pills, which threw me into a whirlwind of intense depression with the thought of my dad dying from something I myself was doing. Needless to say, I took a break. Switched schools and met with some pot heads. Smoked weed for the first time, thought it was boring, so I searched around for more things. Got back into spice and pills.

But then...I met this girl, C, who asked me if I've ever tripped before. I had not touched psychedelics before I met her. I always thought the idea of hallucinating as a 'myth'. So one day she picked me up after work, I'm 18 and graduated from high school at this point, and she said we're going to NYC to trip on some mushrooms. 'Sounds cool to me.' So, we got there and I ate an 8th, she ate a 16th and two tabs of acid. Nothing was happening for an hour for me. She was deep inside her head, I was holding her hand while she was crying. I didn't understand why and neither did she. So, I thought nothing of it. I started to get pissed off because nothing 'trippy' was happening.

I started to get pissed off because nothing 'trippy' was happening.

 What about all the stories I've heard of aliens and trees turning into liquid? 'What a bummer...' But then...I looked at this giant ten story billboard with a soda can on it. There was condensation on the can. I started to focus more on it with an odd confusion. 'The water on it is dripping?' I nudge my other friend, M, asking, 'Dude, is that giant billboard a lcd screen?' He said 'no, why?' I said that it's fucking dripping. He laughed. I looked over at a building next to it and the windows were going in and out, the sides of the building were swaying side to side and the color of it kept changing. So I was actually fucking stocked! This shit really works!

That first trip jolted me to desire more. I said I wanted to always do mushrooms. I thought that was badass that things would just move by themselves. Eventually I was introduced to Lucy. Oh boy was that a million times better.

I am an artist in a lot of different ways. I like to write poetry, construct music, create paintings and sketches, and photography. I've also loved to indulge myself in various forms of thinking. I like to think I'm empathic from the hundreds of people I've come into contact with. I study the way other minds work and why they work in those way. In all I have always had a niche for paying close attention to detail, and creating things from nothing, or looking at something wanting to alter it to show what I see. Once I dropped my first tab I literally fell straight into my head. I never thought a drug could make me feel so at home in my own skin. I always wanted to be someone else or to forget myself, probably from the years being depressed and what not.

Enough back story. Today is a year after my first trip. I've slowly built up my tolerance and created different 'rooms' for each amount of acid I would take at a time. My favorite was 8 tabs. It was the perfect balance of in-depth thought, visual hallucination, and sound visualization. Me and C were going to buy a strip each to hop up to the next level, but our dealer said he only had a strip, but he has mescaline and ketamine. I haggled him to give me a good deal on all three. I then had 5 tabs, 40mg of K, and 300mg of mescaline for myself.

+0:00 I ate the whole lot as soon as he gave it to me. As soon as I ate them I instantly felt euphoria. Mainly because it's been two weeks since I last tripped. (I had a problem with psychedelics. Since I considered Lucy as a woman I fell in love with her and being in a trip as being home

I had a problem with psychedelics. Since I considered Lucy as a woman I fell in love with her and being in a trip as being home

 you can see why it was hard for me not to miss tripping since I was living in my friends car.) C then looked at me and said, 'I'll meet you there!'

After the whole deal went down we started to realize we didn't have a plan of what we were doing. So we hopped back into her car and started to drive to the mall to see who was there. (Me and her were mall rats at the time.)

[Erowid Note:
Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]

+0:30 While I was driving I started to get the tickle bellies and the jaw thing. We got to the mall and our usual crowd was there. All of their faces were so odd mixed with the florescent lighting. A lot of depth was starting to appear. On the more inward level, I could see how insecure all of them were and it made me want to get them to be more themselves and not these little emo kids that just want attention, but at the same time don't want anyone to notice how weak and emotional they are. I had thoughts about bettering my life and getting away from these people. I kept thinking how much of a loser I am for being in the mall while tripping. I shrugged that thought off like I do every time, because who wants to think about how much a piece of shit you are while tripping. After that I started conversations with random people, going out for cigarettes occasionally. I would talk to the security and asked him what his views on mall rats are. He didn't seem to be too fond of them, but he likes how easy it is to get weed from them.

+2:00 Eventually, C's ex showed up and started to give her a hard time for tripping so we decided to hit the road. I was getting bored of being a pest to the mall faculty. We hop into the car and I start feeling a peak come on so I started to book it to C's house. Apparently while I wasn't looking C invited 9 people to her parents house. (She was kicked out, but she still had the key.) So, we started to drive there trying to make sure they don't get there before us. We get there and most of them are already in the drive way. We step inside and everyone goes down to the basement to smoke up. I didn't like weed at the time because it made me feel weird and I would think about how fucked up my life is. So I chilled in her living room staring at the ceiling.

+3:00 My body felt so strange against the leather couch. My arms kept sticking to it creating this weird noise every time I lift my arm.

+3:30 For a moment I saw these dots in the ceiling. I didn't remember seeing them before. They started to move more vigorously. Now they are starting to spin. Slowly...now faster. A bit faster. I can't see dots anymore I can only see a technicolor circle. These lines start to connect within the circle. They formed some weird triangular thing. The design then stopped moving...It shoots straight towards me; I'm engulfed inside some tunnel. It feels as if I'm being sucked into a worm hole. I thing see a snake starting to appear. It slithers closer to me until it too engulfs me. It's an endless amount of snakes devouring me. I start to become increasingly more nervous. But then I see something. I'm not too sure what to make of it, but it moves with the strangest speed. It feels like it's moving fast but it's also moving insanely slow. I then see that it's a head with an intense crowd upon it. The trails are endless with the most insane amount of colors per trail. A woman appears in front of me. She is the most beautiful, magnificent woman I have ever seen. She is glowing. Oh my god she was a goddess. She starts to speak to me...But the words she's speaking are unrecognizable. I have never heard someone speak in this way. I keep asking her what she is saying. I can't understand her. Her face begins to get angry. Her eyes glow red. She starts to scream at me. I just want her to stop. Why won't she stop screaming at me. She then lets out the loudest sound I have ever heard in my imagination. Her jaw snaps...It dangles by a thread of muscle. She then shoots out to me. Devouring me. Then that was it. Nothing more. I start to notice where I am again. I almost don't even see any visuals, but the thoughts are still there.

I would continue explaining this trip, but there's not much more. I tell C what just happened. She starts to talk about extremely angry things. Beating up some stuffed animal she found. Eventually the trip simmers down for the two of us and we go to walmart to buy some glass bottles filled with soda and go to some abandoned road and smash them,  breaking bottles is one of the best things to do when I really can't handle the anger that's inside me.

Epilogue.

I learned from that experience that my mind was telling me that I'm fucking up my life and I need to get it together. So, I did. Now I trip once a year and do no other drugs. I've found a way to bring the awareness of psychedelics into my everyday life. The only thing I needed to do was pay attention.

Yay, happy ending.

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 104739

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 20

Published: Dec 27, 2018	Views: 1,863

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Ketamine (31), Mescaline (36), LSD (2) : Various (28), Depression (15), Entities / Beings (37), Combinations (3)


		 DOSE:

		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   105 lb

This trip report is a mix of a difficult and enlightening experience. However, at the time I was extremely emotionally and physically distressed. This report is to help others decide whether or not to take LSD, particularly people who live in the country and are used to being alone.

My story begins on a late July evening. I had just finished a typical night of smoking some weed with my cousin (known as T) at a friend's house. When the session was over, they had explained the night prior everyone tripped and they had a couple tabs leftover. I had done LSD before with Ecstasy and totally fried my brain, but that was months ago.  I was pretty damn bored that night, with nothing planned after my cousin would drop me off. I bought the tab for cheap and my cousin and I were on our way.

Cousin T and I were driving around, and I was pretty excited to finally trip without any other substance distorting the purity of the experience.

I was pretty excited to finally trip without any other substance distorting the purity of the experience.

  I had put the tab under my tongue, and she immediately replied "Whoa dude. I'm not gonna be able to hang with you all night.  You're gonna be feeling pretty crazy." I was 18 and pretty naive despite past history of drug use. I had no idea what I was getting in to.

She dropped me off at my house and I had yet to feel anything.  I did not eat much that day, which turns out to be a not-so-good idea.  I went up to my room and put on King of the Hill on Adult Swim. Suddenly, the acid kicked in.  A character's voice began speaking quite slowly, and I visually saw their mouth moving slowly despite knowing they were not talking like that at all.  This experience distressed me despite being mentally prepared for tripping effects.  My room was dark except for the tv, and watching this strange effect amplified the madness of the acid.  My anxiety grew, and I began feeling detached from reality. I did not lose my cool, but I went downstairs to let my parents know I was going for a night walk (this was a normal occurrence for me and did not spark any issues).

Although I went on a night walk to help ease my nerves, I vomited profusely a couple of times.  It was embarrassing, as I'm sure some neighbors heard it. My dad had Neil Young playing on his outdoor speakers and I SWEAR I was able to hear clearly defined music for at least half a mile, despite other noises of summer nights in the country like crickets or neighborhood bonfires.  I thought that was an amazing feature, and I rode on that for the rest of the trip. On my walk, I was able to keep it cool when cars went by, even though the headlights were exceptionally bright.  Lights from homes which shone onto the road looked distorted in a way that is hard to describe: almost sideways, and curved.  My peripheral vision seemed cloudy and bent in a strange, almost flashing way.  To elaborate, the light in my peripheral vision seemed to flash, but I knew this was only an effect from the acid.  Regardless, it actually kept spooking me a bit and keeping me on my nerves. Whenever I smoked a cigarette, I knew I only took one or two drags, but my cigarette LOOKED finished. IT WAS SO WEIRD, and one of the funniest/strangest effects I ever had off a drug. I am going to assume that is from how fucked up my vision was. I wonder if anyone else had that experience.

I began playing Sgt. Peppers, and when I reached Lovely Rita, it seemed like I lost my ego. I am unsure exactly, but I forgot that I took a drug. I just felt like I was the only person in the entire universe who did not feel "normal", and this is I believe the worst part about tripping alone.  I felt so far-out of myself, I could not relate to my surroundings in the cozy way I had all my life. I was very familiar with the surroundings I was in, but I felt disconnected

I was very familiar with the surroundings I was in, but I felt disconnected

, and vivaciously nauseous the entire trip. I am sure my empty stomach and low blood sugar did not help me enjoy my trip.

I ended up making it back home after awhile, and I attempted to make Ramen noodles to eat something.  As expected, this failed, and I did not have a notion of what boiling water had felt like, and I almost spilled a whole pot of it onto my hand.  I ended up eating fruit, but I was shaking from nerves about this entire experience and I vomited all over myself.  I tried to go back up to my room, as I realized no matter what environment I was in, I was going to be uncomfortable and distraught.  This was the worst part of my trip: I legitimately felt like I was dying. I attribute this to ego loss, forgetting I was on a drug, not having a trip sitter to ground me, not letting anyone know what I was doing besides my cousin, and not really having a good time.  I never ended up falling asleep that night, and I had to work the next day all day.  I had a smoothie for breakfast with my parents, but I vomited that up as well. I remember wanting to be near them, and being relieved at watching the sunrise happen the next morning. I came off my trip, but I felt so physically ass-kicked that I NEVER touched LSD again.

In short, this experience actually enlightened my life by showing me to appreciate the health I have (mentally and physically) and to appreciate the boorishness of sober mindsets.  To be honest, this experience occurred about 7 months after my mom died and I did not properly grieve or accept this.  My trip has shown me that physical death is inevitable,  but you must treat your mind and your brain cells with ABSOLUTE care. This trip helped me become a more responsible person, and to stop treating substances as the "answer".

I do not regret taking LSD, but I always wonder if I would be a happier person without it.  I stopped talking to those friends and my cousin, as I realized how toxic they were using drugs for recreation so frequently while never achieving the dreams they always talk about.  Can't win all the time, I suppose.  Thank you for reading this, as this experience meant alot to me. I hope it can help others as well.

Exp Year: 2014	ExpID: 112738

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: 18

Published: Dec 27, 2018	Views: 930

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LSD (2) : General (1), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD

		 oral
		 Alcohol - Beer/Wine
		 (liquid)

		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   155 lb

I had been wanting to try LSD for some time. Prior to my experience with LSD, mushrooms and DXM were my two trips of choice. Since some friends and I were going to attend a festival and planned on taking LSD there, I decided I would like to try it out before we went so I could see what my tolerance was and know what to expect.

My friend 'K' informed me that he could get some 'good acid' for only $15. So I gladly purchased a dose (one sugar cube). That night a friend of mine 'S' was having a cabin party out at a lake and I decided to take the dose and not tell anyone (I'm extremely perceptive and even more so when on psychoactives) because I dont enjoy having people that aren't tripping knowing that I am (it's all the weird looks, expectations, and pragmatics of discussion that make me uneasy). This turned out to be a good decision on my part.

I took the dose and joined my friends at the bonfire on the beach. It was already night and very dark out as I started to get giggly.

The onset took roughly 30-40 min before I knew I was indeed on a trip. The conversations around the fire took on a new level of connection. I felt I knew EXACTLY what my friends would say before they said it, which meant that I had a witty (often humorous) response waiting at the end of their every statement. This was a very good experience, around the bonfire, I felt the way MDMA makes me feel, deeply connected to my surroundings and the friends around me.

When I went inside to get a beer and use the restroom I noticed that I was soaring to the plateau of my trip. The bathroom was exquisite! The beach motif in the room, with warm colors and such, was amazing...it was clear I was on my way. When I came back out and gave my friend K a beer, he suggested we play a little nerf ball. Intrigued, I joined his team of 3 and inquired about the rules. Nerf ball consisted of two teams of 3 throwing a nerf (whistling) football and trying to hit each other from roughly 60 yards down the beach in the pitch black. Needless to say this was EXTREMELY thrilling while on LSD.

I was all giggles as we would turn our backs to the other team and wait for the whistle of the football to come our way. Imagine something out of an old war movie with whistling torpedoes wizzing past your head. I scored for our team by hitting someone on their team and I was ecstatic, feeling the way a child does when they have found an inner connection with a new group of friends (although this had been my group of friends for years and years).

After the game (at this time I was clearly plateauing) my friend K suggested a boat ride. This idea caught my attention immediately and I ran to secure a spot in the back of the boat. After cracking a few jokes with my friend R who was accompanying me in the back of the boat(and crying after laughing for so long) we left the shore and began to cruise the black waters of the lake. I recall repeating 'the stars sure are good tonight' several times, to anyone who would listen. Out in the country away from the city lights we were privy to thousands of twinkling stars. These stars were the focus of my hallucinations. I had never seen anything so beautiful as the stars that night, but I wasn't viewing them the same way as I did when sober. Tonight (on LSD) the stars seemed to be on several different planes of dimension. By this I mean that I could tell how far or near stars were, which galaxies shown the brightest and found it extremely easy to mentally map our boats progress by merely using the stars. It felt like if we were to boat to the edge of the lake we could just continue our journey out into the stars and space. They (the stars) were projected in a sort of 3D real-time where depth, distance, brightness, and location all merged together making me feel as if I could navigate our boat to anywhere in the world with no problems if I so desired. One last note about the night sky is that I found (and still hold, strangely enough)a deep interest in flying planes. Since the stars were so detailed in their location and depth I could see EXACTLY where the plane's trajectory was from and where it was leading it. Imagine viewing the sky, not as a 2D plane of reference, but more of a 3D aviary where I could see up to, under, and around all sides of a plane in the night sky. It gives me a very real feeling of superior vision.

After the boat ride, my trip began to slow down and die off small bits at a time. I found that smoking cannabis (I'm a daily user anyway) gave me a great sense of normality, making the come down easy and light; but at the same time highlighting what was left of the LSD in my body. Around this time I found a seat at the now dwindling bonfire and starred at the flames, falling into a trance of inner reflection. I study philosophy at a local university and found that LSD offered me a much clearer (than mushrooms) window into my consciousness and the systems of the world. I should note that my entire trip I found myself again and again wanting to write about what I was seeing/thinking/feeling. During this inner reflection a Japanese tourist/friend of a friend was also starring into the flames quietly. I couldn't help but notice her and what she was doing. After nearly 30 minutes of watching the fire she reached her hand into the heart of the burning pit, calmly and without haste. She reached into the flames so far that from my vantage point I could no longer see her arm nor what she was reaching for. Her hand emerged holding a small piece of wood about the size of a persons fist. She looked at it then proceeded to place it in a different place in the fire. As soon as she had strategically placed this insignificant piece of wood back into the fire; what was once a dwindling spark became the raging fire it once was earlier in the night. This absolutely blew me away, because for hours my American friends had tried to beat, stir, and add to the fire to make it roar...and she had taken this all in and when everyone had tried their method she quietly crept to the fire, healed it, and backed away so as not to incur any recognition for her deed. This gave me a great understanding of the Japanese culture and how americans always believe they can fix anything by merely adding to it, when in fact the solution is hidden in the problem itself.

After the fire finally burnt out everyone went inside to go to bed. I found there was no way I could sleep and decided to drive home and shower before work the next morning. On the drive home (it was sunrise) I found incredible inner peace and sanctuary, while at the same time feeling slight depression and mourning for the sensations I had while on LSD.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 72093

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 1, 2019	Views: 825

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LSD (2) : General (1), Nature / Outdoors (23), Large Party (54)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 MDMA
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 3:00
		 .5 tablets
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 5:00
		 .5 tablets
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 6:00
		 .5 tablets
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   120 lb

MDMA Made My First Acid Trip Beautiful

This was my first LSD experience, so the friend who gave me the acid advised me to take MDMA first to help avoid the possibility of a bad trip. (I’ve taken MDMA three times before this.) I’ve been wanting to take acid for several years, mainly so I could see the world in the startlingly different way that so many have raved about, and see what it might show me about life and myself. I’m in a fairly good place in my life and I don’t have deep, painful issues I’m dealing with that might complicate an LSD trip, but I’m not highly experienced with psychoactives and my friend knew I was a little nervous about what LSD might do to my mind, and he wanted to help make it good for me.

So I took one MDMA pill at 2:00 in the afternoon. I was at a friend’s house, which is small, warm, and super-cozy, and most of the time I lay on her sofa wrapped up in a blanket. During my E peak, I just talked to her about my past and felt happy (which is what I tend to do on E.) I finally took half a hit of acid at 5:00, toward the middle to end of my MDMA peak. My friend (who’s taken a lot of acid in the past) took half a hit at 5:00 as well. (She didn’t want to get super-high, just moderately high.) By 7:00 she said she was high, but I didn’t feel it yet. “How can you tell?” I asked. “If you can’t tell, you’re not high,” she answered. I only felt a strange, calm muddiness, as though the tail end experience of the X had simply extended for a really long time, but without the joy of the X peak. My friend suggested that the LSD was having to get through the MDMA to show its effects.

I took another half hit of acid at 7:00, and at 8:00, still not feeling strong effects—just feeling the sense of being out of it and in a timeless haze—I took a final half hit. Finally at around 9:00, images started changing. The flowers on the table began to have slight motion. Colors started leaping from the lights in my peripheral vision.

At 10:00 I began to truly peak on the acid. The wall looked like it was melting in beautiful green waves, and I was astounded at how I could look at one corner of the room and see it countless different ways—my brain could take all the same bits of visual information and put them together in a million ways. There was a Beatles album cover on a shelf, and their four faces changed throughout the night, coming to life, growing older then younger, switching places on the cover, their lips moving as though they were speaking to me. The flowers around the room seemed to be in flames: they undulated and glowed from within and danced. The room darkened and lightened, and the most amazing thing was music: I felt as though the music we were listening to (mostly mellow jazz and some Beatles) was in my head, and had been written for this exact occasion, and that the singers on the CD were actually speaking to me in a regular voice—they weren’t singing notes, they were talking to me quite clearly. At one point, I even thought that the song I was hearing was actually what I was thinking in my head, and I had to turn to my friend in slight confusion to see if she heard it too: “Is that the CD or is it what I was thinking?” I asked. I could hear every layer of sound in each song as I never had before, every instrument and every harmony, and the harmonies were so rich and beautiful it was almost painful.

The thing I didn’t have was bold new insights or great clarity of thought. I didn’t suddenly have an Einsteinian “eureka!” moment about the meaning of life. I think that might be because the MDMA had clouded some of the clarity I’ve heard results from acid, and my brain—while incredibly busy, almost overloaded with the beauty and vibrancy of the color and movement around me—was not able to focus well, but only to receive everything I was seeing and hearing. However, the way I was able to see the world, and the amazement I felt in response to that new vision, was a profound experience in and of itself, even without specific, meaningful thought. It was truly a powerful all-sensory experience—which makes sense because it was infuenced by the X.

In most ways it was an ideal first acid trip. What made it so was the music, the X I took beforehand, my friend’s cozy house, and her kindness—she’d get up to change the music or get me water every so often, and otherwise she was happily tripping on a sofa nearby and always had a smile for me, so I felt very safe. I’ll feel more comfortable taking acid alone now that I have a sense of its effects.

Exp Year: 2006	ExpID: 57677

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 1, 2019	Views: 1,060

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MDMA (3), LSD (2) : General (1), First Times (2), Combinations (3), Music Discussion (22), Guides / Sitters (39), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 3 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (edible / food)

		 oral
		 LSD
		 (liquid)

		 3 hits
		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   100 lb

[Erowid Note:
The dose described in this report is very high, potentially beyond Erowid's 'heavy' range, and could pose serious health risks or result in unwanted, extreme effects. Sometimes extremely high doses reported are errors rather than actual doses used.]

It was about 10 at night and I was with my two roommates. We were completely bored so my boyfriend and I decided randomly to take some LSD. The other roommate doesn't really enjoy tripping that much but he was completely ok with just hanging out with us for the night. My boyfriend and I both had a 3 hitter sugarcube and we had the remnants of a vial left.  We had been saving this vile for sometime but didn't know quit what to do with it.  We just decided to go for it.  We then cut it open and licked out the remaining liquid in it. Stupid move, but we thought it would probably be a fun night. After the trip had ended I would say that it felt about like 9 hits total for the night?  That is a complete guess but just for the sake of trying to put a number on it, I think that's it.

Just for the record we are both very experienced with LSD, although we had never taken quite as much as this we have taken 5-6 hits on a regular basis.  We have never had bad trips either, maybe rough moments but that's about it.

It was almost instantaneous. Most likely because of us licking it out, I don't know.  I would say less than 20 minutes we were very much coming up.  Everything was going awesome though.  We were both feeling really great and decided to go down to the basement to play some music and just hang out.  My boyfriend, lets call him John, was playing guitar and I was playing piano, and it was awesome. Ha. Playing music while tripping is the most awkward yet satisfying thing. I became completely entranced in it. For full minutes at a time I would just go off on my own little solo and feel as though it was my soul speaking in music form.

I then decided to do some painting which only turned out to be bright colors and squiggly lines of weird faces and things. My other roommate, Frank was just playing drums completely happy watching us playing and painting terribly.  I would find myself just staring at the tapestry on the wall as the butterflies would almost fly off of it and around the room. I could feel their souls, they were real. The picture I was painting was real, the man's face I was drawing was speaking to me. Sometimes good sometimes mean things.  My spirits were still high though.

After about an hour of this we decided to go upstairs, it wasn't quite as intense as we were expecting so we decided to smoke some weed. If there was anything we shouldn't have done, it was smoke weed.  We usually do quite a bit but almost instantaneously after smoking the other three hits from the sugar cubes brought us to our knees.  We were just sitting on the couch listening to Tom Waits and my world collapsed. The room fell over on itself. Frank told me afterwards that I said I'm going crazy, the world is falling apart. With each second the room would collapse on itself then the next second it would do it again and then again.  I would close my eyes and I had no idea what was going on outside of my mental head.  I had no idea if I was standing, sitting, laying, nothing. All I could feel was pure terror.  It was the biggest mind-fuck I have ever experienced. I remember looking up and seeing my roommate and being scared to death of him because he wasn't tripping with me and had no idea what I was going through. I curled up in my boyfriend's lap (who at this point later said that at that moment almost the same thing happened to him) and cried and kept repeating I'm going crazy, I'm going crazy.  After what seemed to be an eternity (I'm sure it was only a minute) I regained sight of what was happening, I was just tripping, it is only a drug.  We decided some fresh air would do us good.

I think sometimes walking is the only way to go, so we walked.  The world was dark, not new and fresh like I had experienced in every other trip. There were demons lurking around every tree, every bush. Just keep walking, just keep walking. My heart was racing.  I would close my eyes and my body would disappear, my lip ring was the only thing that still existed. (It was really weird, but I think because I was biting it constantly that that's why I thought this) My body was dead. All that was left was my beating heart, I was a walking dead.  I asked several times if there was any way I could die from this drug only to have my boyfriend reassure me that there was no way on only 9 hits.

We talked and talked, mostly about theology. We were completely unhindered to talk about religion, spirituality, and how we think the world should be.  God seemed utterly ridiculous. Religion was ridiculous. Culture seemed ridiculous.  I didn't even know why I even wore clothes.

At one point during the night we saw a train go by.  We ran full sprint until we were about 5 feet from it.  It was the most amazing thing I had ever seen.  The only thing that was real at that moment was the train. Everything else was some sort of foreign world.  The train was almost comforting.  The sound of the whistles, the way the wheels sound on the tracks.  It was so large and so loud it took over my world for those few minutes. It was one of those moments that you are so overwhelmed that you just want to cry, not out of terror, but out of awe.  The wind from the train was absolutely breathtaking.

From there we decided to go inside we were feeling a little better after that.  The house was so foreign. While walking up the stairs I felt like I was entering new worlds. If I looked at anything I could see a fourth dimension. It's really hard to explain, but it was definitely nothing like a 3-d world. The walls were more than breathing, they were alive.  The door would move so much that it could be on the other side of the wall. Everything had a spirit, everything had a voice talking to me, some comforting, some not so comforting.  I eventually had to lay on the bed, which is where I stayed for the rest of the night and closed my eyes.  I had to just let go of everything holding me back from having a good trip.  Every anxiety, I just had to let go of.  The world was swimming in itself. It was almost like the world was dancing. For the last couple of hours that is all that we did, lay there and let the music and the world dance with us.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 64349

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 17, 2019	Views: 932

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LSD (2), Cannabis (1) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Bad Trips (6), Music Discussion (22), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (edible / food)

		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

		 1 tablet
		 oral
		 Pharms - Clonazepam
		 (pill / tablet)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

Spring was here, the snow melted, the temperature started to rise and freedom from being shut in from winter gave its yearly relief. Some friends of mine and I planned on going to a festival in late May. This was my first festival and I was quite pumped for drugs and live music. Because I was quite excited and had to work late the night before sleep was something I had little of. We were running a little bit behind schedule but we made it. My friend (we’ll call him Ole) was excited as I was and because he was excited as I was he too had little to no sleep. We struggled to set our tents probably and in the end I am glad it didn’t rain like it was supposed to because my tent totally would have been soaked inside.

When I arrived and saw everyone else on various drugs that were going around my first feeling wanted to get on the same level as them. After watching the main band that we went there for it was roughly 12:30 am. During this time my other friend (we’ll call him Sven) had gotten some Oreos that had two hits on each Oreo. We went to our tents and got some more Oreos. I took one Oreo and both Sven and Ole took two Oreos.

We sat in the tents, smoked Cannabis and visited with the guy we got the Oreos from. After he left my two friends and I decided to take a walk. My guess is that it was around 1:30 am. I started to feel the affects around this time. It rained quite hard earlier so the night was cool and damp. In my head as I walked through the mud I imagined it as the area labeled between two trenches during WW1 called “No man’s land”. This is a place where I don’t want to be. Not sure why No man’s land was in my head, it could have been the cool and foggy weather which is quite similar to European weather and the mud reminded me of trenches. While I was in No man’s land another feel of worry swept over me. The dark realization came in my head that I was in an unfamiliar place that I have never been to.

By this time I would say it was around 2:45 am. I was kind of paranoid of giving my friends a bad trip so I never once said anything about No man’s land or being worried about being in an unfamiliar place. I would about twenty minutes later manage to tell myself to calm down and that I was in an unfamiliar place but it definitely was not a hostile one. I have taken LSD a few times before so I learned the ability control and ease my worried tripping mind.

My trip started to turn good at this point. I became mesmerized by the trees as they swayed in the air. The branches seemed to sway in the wind so harmoniously that it was as if I heard music and the branches were dancing to the music. I did notice that someone was playing some electronic music by their tent. This made me laugh pretty hard perhaps because the idea that whoever was playing music had no idea that he was helping in my trip and that amused me quite a lot. We decided to take our stroll towards the outhouses to empty our bladders. I’d say when we went to the outhouses it was around 3:30 am. I stood in a pitch black outhouse urinating while directly at face level there was a hand sanitizer dispenser. Since it was dark enough the only thing I could see was the shape of it. I started to contort faces I saw on this dispenser. I was going between smiling and frowning. In my head after I contorted the face to frowning for about the fourth time I looked a little above the dispenser and there was the most evil demonic looking smiling face with triangle shaped teeth. This face was huge and it took up most of the wall I was standing in front of. I quickly looked down, shaked and walked out of the outhouse. I took a deep breath and said to Ole as I was laughing “shit dude it’s fuckin intense in there”. He agreed as he looked back the stalls (I have no idea what he saw in the stall he went in). We walked around more and at this point we didn’t really have a whole lot to do so we decided to go back to the tent and smoke some more Cannabis.

When we got back into the tent we smoked a lot of weed mainly because it was something to do and we had plenty of it. There was this extremely annoying security golf cart that drove right by our tent because we set up our tents right by the path (there were slim pickins for tent spots when we got there). The light flashing was a little nerve wracking. But we learned to deal with it. Ole humorously told me that this is my castle and I have complete control of it. Ole is quite a big guy with a deep voice. As I looked at him looking out of the tent at other people he reminded me of this large goofy medieval general that was in charge of an army that was protecting this castle. It was very cartoon like and extremely funny. We continued smoking and thought it would be funny to shine our flash light at people walking by. One guy with a UN helmet came walking past and he dropped everything and said in a much panicked voice “Im cool man, Im just looking for the bathrooms”. The even funnier part of it was he was walking in the opposite direction of the bathrooms. Right now I can admit that I feel a little bad fuckin with the dude. It was probably the Cannabis

It was starting to get light out by now. Ole then assured me that if it rains I will get wet. I am sure it was true and that was something that made me a little uneasy but at this time I was laying down in the tent staring at this red line through on the tent roof noticing that it was getting light out. I knew that this would bring on new hallucinations so I popped my head out and enjoyed looking at the branches while admiring the colors of green in contrast with the whitish gray milky color of the sky. The time then was probably around 4:30-5:00 am.

I sat back up and realized that Sven has been a little quite. Right after me noticing that my buddy was being a little quite I noticed that red line on the ceiling of the tent again. That red line distracted me. I looked at this line and noticed that the red inside the line started forming what kind of looked like D.N.A. As I was completely staring at the line I listened to Sven and Ole talk. Sven was getting a little worried about the tent and it not being waterproof. I told him not to worry. I had no reason to give why he shouldn’t worry but at this time I was too enthralled by the red line and honestly didn’t at all care about the rain. Ole assured Sven that it would be alright and he should calm down. Sven then said “no its not, it’s not alright”. At this point t was obvious that Sven was having a bad trip.

Ole and I tried talking to Sven again. He was unresponsive. We asked him again still with no response. He was in this total vegetative state for a good few minutes. Ole then humorously said “dude your tripping balls”. Sven then just got this horrible look on his face like he was just rejected by the girl of his dreams or something. We asked him if he was alright. Sven then finally replied “I am just losing my mind”. I humorously retorted “right, isn’t it awesome just relax and go with it” in an attempt to lighten the mood. My eyes were still fixed to this red line and watching all the different shapes flow through it like a river. Ole then looked at Sven and asked “dude are you crying, do you need a hug”? Ole replied with “no, I fucked up”. Okay, I must vaguely explain background of this. Sven has some legal issues and he is essentially looking at 15 years in prison. He thanked Ole for being such a good friend and I thought maybe these negative emotions were leaving him.

We sparked up another bowl and Sven told Ole “I get it now”. Ole and I were trying to figure out what he gets but we never really did. He would not respond to the question “what do you get”?  He said it again “I get it now”. We asked again “what do you get”? He looked at Ole with a very angry look and said in a stern voice “why are you doing this to me”! We asked Sven what Ole was doing and he wouldn’t say. I tried to calm him down and I offered him a cigarette. He replied to my offer “no I am turning my life back to Christ”. I knew Sven was a Christian so I encouraged it and maybe thought it would calm him down or at least bring some kind of light in his head. Sven then said “dude I am never doing acid again”. When he said this I had it my mind that it was almost a mission or something of Ole and I to calm him down and turn his trip around. At this point also I stopped paying attention to the time but it had to be at least 6 am and we all were still tripping pretty hard. Sven then proceeded to speak in tongues and call out for Jesus to save him. This to say the least freaked the fuck out of Ole and I. I then said “dude we have been in this tent for way to long, lets go for a walk”.

Sven got out first, then Ole and me. When I got out of the tent (which was quite the challenge) Ole told me that Sven stared at him as he was hiding behind a tree right by our tent and then ran away. Ole then started freaking out. He said “dude this is not good, some crazed hippy with his knife on him running around thinking that people are trying ‘to do something to him’”. Ole has some anxiety issues and has told me before that he is a paranoid schizophrenic. He literally thought that Sven was trying to kill him. I calmed him down and we walked around and discussed this crazy situation. Maybe a half hour later we saw Sven being carried away by two Sheriffs and some security while he was screaming on the top of his lungs ”JESUS IS MY SAVIOUR, HE’S IN THE WHITE VAN”!   I had all these thoughts racing through my head. I have no problem with the whole Jesus thing but when it turns into a snitch thing then it’s no so cool. If he spilled the beans in detail Ole and I might get into trouble for harboring a fugitive. I began to panic. All these thoughts were racing through my head. We walked by a tent of some early risers one of them said to Ole and I “hey you dropped something”. We were obviously confused and looked on the ground. The guy then said “your smile”. I knew this guy had no idea of what situation we were in or the seriousness of it but regardless I found my smile again. When he said that the uncontrollable smile I gave felt like a surge going in face then into my brain of utter happiness and relief. In my still tripping mind I told myself whatever happens, happens and there is nothing I can do about it. I can be all freaked or try to enjoy the rest of my LSD trip. This took a lot of will and mental power. I was going to title this report “Triumph of the will” but unfortunately that is the name of a Nazi propaganda film.

My buddy Ole on the other hand couldn’t achieve the apathy my brain had towards our current situation. He wanted to try to sleep and asked if he could share my tent because remember he still thought Sven was trying to kill him. As Ole and I walked Ole kept on reminding me what was going on as I was noticing all the tents breathing or looking at some pretty girls. I wanted to just walk around more until the LSD wore off but Ole wanted to sleep as he told me “its time to go to bed”. Being the good friend I am I decided to try to get some sleep. My good friend was tripping and he thought someone was trying to kill him. If it was any other situation where we had two tents and he wanted to stay in mine I would have felt a little awkward. I lay down and tried to sleep. The distractions left and the only thing I had was my mind and my thoughts. I started to lose my smile again and became panicked. I asked for a Klonopin pill that Ole was prescribed to. This helped me calm down but I sure did not sleep. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the patterns that my brain produced. I dozed off eventually.

The next day Ole saw Sven sleeping in a cot by the security tent. Nothing happened, the Sheriffs were allowed to be there in order to help security if need be. The park was on private property so it turned out that the police really couldn’t do much. I doubt they even knew of his current legal situation. In the end this trip made me much of a more mature tripper. I have learned that sleep is very important the night before dosing. I will not trip with anyone having something extremely heavy over there head. Sven and Ole were much more mature trippers then I. This experience also has let me learn that even mature trippers can have bad trips. I don’t want to know what kind of hellish crazy world my friend Sven was in but because of what I learned from this event hopefully I will never be there. As freaky as this was this is something now I can laugh about.

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 91651

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 23

Published: Jan 24, 2019	Views: 760

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LSD (2) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Bad Trips (6), Nature / Outdoors (23), Festival / Lg. Crowd (24)


		 DOSE:

		   repeated
		 oral
		 Alcohol
		 (liquid)

		 3 tablets
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   180 lb

Obama had just won presidency, and I was moved to tears by his emphasis on America's greatest assets being truth, democracy, and egalitarian relations (instead of conquest, military force, and wealth).  I celebrated all night, dancing spontaneously at numerous parties on my college campus, shouting 'here's to humanity, here's to our mother earth!'.  I got blissfully drunk.

Once inebriated and back in my dormroom at 4am, I took 3 tabs on a whim.  The duration of the experience happened in this room.

The trip was a rollercoaster:  at points I contemplated suicide matter-of-factly (absent of terror and anxiety), while at other points I was seeing a divine eye and matrix overlooking me.

For this report, I want to focus on the 'negative' experience, as I think it highlights the possibility for 'unwanted life-changing experiences.'

As the LSD came on strong, I was staring out my window.  I saw beautiful trees, greenery, and thriving life (including groups of students merrily walking), but this beauty was CUT and MARRED by the numerous roads and cars streaking like dirty death bullets through my campus.  This led to the realization that I was in the city, deeply desiring a natural habitat but unable to access it.

I have always been a huge fan of human rights.  While not religious, I firmly believe in the human spirit.  This experience undermined and questioned what I thought to be a guiding force in my life.

I lost my ego to the force of 'human conquest,' strangling every last living beauty from this earth.  I realized that no matter what I did, there was no way to escape being a firm member of a destructive civilization.  The notion that an environmentally destructive civilization is the 'natural evolution of humankind' became imprinted on my cosmic view.

Since returning to baseline, I have re-questioned my unwanted awakening, and do not plan to change my course in life (guided by love for both the planet and humanity).  However, it was a deeply disturbing experience that irrationally stays in my psyche to this day.

Here's some unfiltered, free-associated thoughts I wrote down while tripping.  I recommend skimming it, as only a few passages are worthy of keeping, but I am including all of it for a wholistic stream-of-consciousness (note: 'fungus' refers to the exponential human population growth on this planet since the industrial revolution):

'ahhh, a further degree of technological relation.  self to self!  mode:  conscious express uninhibited happening.

flowing through.  pulsating.  everything is electric!  electrified!

To think that this existence, this ability to sit around and take acid, to mobble bobble, all this free time, to think its based off of the industrial revolution....the pillaging and raping of the earth...the species dying, the population rising, two roads cut through like dirt on this computer screen, cringing at my being, two roads cut through what should be all unified grass and green...   oh civilization is a strange thing.

Somehow, it really HIT IT when we got MACHINES to start doing the WORK.  WooooooW, we can't sustain this shit man!  the earth is getting fucked! (resemblence of holding onto consciousness, no but let it go.  ability to express clear.  functionability.  clear.    (why delete anything)

up against all this political stuff, yes i'll put fourth my part to change, but i also can't help but feel that i am like a fungus, a colonizing force meant to choke this planet of life yet somehow fully realized and capable of doing it

blaahaahhahhhahahahh!!! fuck the industrial blah.  throw up.  blah.  FUCK THIS CITY.

FUCK  THIS CITY.  BASED COMPLETELY OFF POLLUTING CARS.  UGLY CARS.  CARS THAT CUT THROUGH MY SPACE.  CARS THAT CUT OFF THE TREES.  CARS THAT MOVE AT GREATER SPEEDS, GOING TO DISTANT UNKNOWN COLD EFFICIENT LOCATIONS, than any human being walking relaxed in harmon;soiefjsa;lifh

beauty is all around us.

all around us.

all around us.

psychadelic drugs are worth our time and contemplation.

we need to accept the current levels of global pollution are necessary to sustain the current levels of population.  gotta fuck less.

get crazy after while in city.

nasty.  gritty.  grimey.  pollution.  blah.. blah...blahh....

hey sustainable technology used for GOOD CAUSES.  like this computer and the internet.  but wait.  i'm connected to the fungus again.

if you might as well just shoot yourself to stop the fungus spreading on the earth and choking it of all its life, then BOOM LIFE IS MEANINGLESS AND ABSURD.

what happened to the music man?

HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY NOT BE THE FUNGUS IN A FUNGUS WORLD!?!?!?!?  FUN  GUS!!!

well, you can eat local only waht your hands have put in on \produce takt eh tiem to walk places or even bike yeah okay

STOP BEING THE FUNGUS STOP THE FUNGUS STOP THE FUNGUS STOP THE FUNGUS STOP THE FUNGUS STOP THE FUNGUS

bounce bounce bounce!!!

WE GOTTA STOP THE FUNGUS ON THE PLANET ATAAAHAHHH! F UNGUS ON MY SKIN!!! HS;LFKHJASG;LHASDF;LJASG;LASHF;LSDJADSDOIHSA;FLJ!

lost lost lost

wonder how long you'd stay dead in this room? before they discovered your body.

LOST IS THE CITY!

lesser population timeless evolution social quality interaction

simply having fewer people around to get to know, or having to relate again and again in a community to the same peop

when we're all kids we're running around making sense making sense hahahaha IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

looking back over

I WANT OUT!  I WANT OUT OF THE SYSTEM!

free everyone in the street

YOU CHOOSE you choose you choose information overload information overload YOU CHOOSE YOU CHOOSE (that sounds exquisitely robotic - FUNGUS!)s

reflecting from a slightly less enlightened? (not inebriated, not intoxicated, no, just wanting to run nonsense and play, throw big balloons against the wall).  loss of ego during this experience was to human/population growth, colonizing the planet like a 'fungus.'  (industrial revolution is the innoculation (on a human population vs time graph, we start to show unrestricted growth right after the late 1700's to mid 1800's).  quite a nasty greater-ego. felt helpless, and therefore figured life is meaningless, as no matter what i do, civilization will continue doing its thing.

BUT THERE ARE WRITERS SPEAKING UP EVERYWEHRE!  COURAGE IS COMING FROM EVERYWHERE!  YOU NEED TO SAVE THIS PLANET!  (ah, returning to self)

but you're surrounded with consumer shit, everywehre, and you're not living according to your beliefs.

you are not living according to your beliefs.

keep pressing as you are, but PROMISE YOU WILL CHANGE my friend, after this degree, you will forevermore LIVE BY YOUR BELIEFS FULLY.  (to continue meaningless fungal force is to live DEAD (by golly that's what a fungus!))

uplifting.  uplifting.

need to change asap.  asap.???

no.  its fine.

simply no more acid until fully living according to beliefs?

ideally, this stuff should be taken in a space of FREEDOM!!!!!!!'

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 74840

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 24, 2019	Views: 981

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LSD (2) : General (1), Combinations (3), Difficult Experiences (5), Bad Trips (6), Unknown Context (20)