		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 0:15
		 0.25 g
		 insufflated
		 PCP
		 (powder / crystals)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   125 lb

This is my first and so far only experiance with the chemical drug LSD, 1 blotter tab with an green alien face on it.

Well I was 16 at the time and I had a week earlier procured 1 hit of acid from a friend of mine. I had decided to do it on a saturday night at a friends house. He had some pot and I had a cap of pcp with me in case the acid was a dude. Wasn't the best settings or anything, but I wanted to use the acid sooner then later in case it wore off somehow before I got the chance to take it (acid is VERY hard to come by in my town, most of the time being blank paper and I don't know how to get it anywhere else at my age).

Time: approximately 12:00 (midnight). I placed the acid on my tongue and let it sit for 15 minutes until it got squishy enough to swallow. Then I swirled up a bunch of spit in my mouth and swallowed it with that. During this time I gave my friend a 1/4 gram of my pcp and then he smoked a joint. I had been hoping to have a very spiritual experiance as best I could but I realised given my surroundings, I basically had thrown away that possibility. Oh and by the way, we were watching the movie Tremors.

12:15. Swallowed the blotter tab and snorted 1/4 of PCP in 4 itty bitty lines. My friend is a horrible person to get stoned with (he mellows out for maybe 15 minutes then goes to bed) and that is exactly what he did..WENT TO BED! ahh so not fun. Anyway, I continued watching the movie for awhile. I wondered if I would have to set the effects into play myself so I started staring at a cartoonish picture of a devil my friend has painted on his wall across from the 2 seater couch in his room. Staring...staring...staring.

12:30. I had been trying to make the picture talk to me or pop out at me but to no effect so I started watching the movie again. After probably another 15 minutes i just casually glanced back up at this devil picture to see it looking 3D. It was a flat picture but it seemed like i could stick my hand underneath it (which is what I tried to do). No matter what angle I looked at it from, I could see below it! At this point I was incredibly happy to know I had gotten real acid and this increased my buzz because it put me in a good mood. I continued watched the movie. And around now the tracers kicked in.

12:45. At this point without me even realising it, reality had totally changed. It was the scene in the movie the town starts getting attacked my tremors (the scene of the girl in her underwear running is all I can remember). Everything seemed weird but I could not put my finger on it. Then during the scene of them on their roofs, everytime someone would touch any thing, roots would shoot out of their fingers and encircle what their were touching, causing it to crack apart but when they removed their hand it would be perfectly normal again. This took place for roughly 15-30 minutes. Then I had to pee...REALLY bad. I probably urinated 5 times that night which is weird.

1:05. Stumbled my way out of his small room and into the dark hallway. Luckily for me the bathroom is directly outside his bedroom, but I was worried if walking in the dark would send me on a bad trip. Keeping the 'it's only a drug' thought in my mind probably saved me many times that night. So as soon as I walk into the bathroom I look at myself in the mirror. WHOA! I'm totally made up of hues of purple. Different shades for every part of my body. And I'm vibrating. It looks like I'm standing on a giant vibrator because of the way I'm just sort of 'buzzing'. I was intrigued by this effect for a long time and kept staring at my hands and face move in the mirror. I leaned in closer to the mirror to get a better look and I put out my hand and it touched the mirror, causing a rippling, watery effect. This effect would also continue throughout the experiance everytime I touched something or took a step.

I remembered I had to pee so I turned to the toilet and as soon as I held my penis, I started masterbating. I realised that is not what I came for and started to pee. The stream of urine was actually kind of boring, the only interesting thing was that the yellowish tint of it caused it to grow incredibly bright. I then inspected around the toilet to make sure that I hadn't actually 'miss-fired' in my drug induced state and was pleased to find that I had not. I sat down on the toilet (with the cover down and pants up) because I wanted to enjoy the bright and clean feeling of this room (nice bathrooms RULE).

I kept stepping on the floor and watching the waves ripping out and pass up the wall. Very cool. I really do not know how long I was here. I remembered about the movie then and decided to get up but when I put my hand on the counter top, there was a giant ripple which shook me and I sat back down. It didn't frighten me though. I looked at my hand and countertop and started tapping beats out with my fingers. Each tap would send out a different note with the waves.  Everything in the bathroom was almost heavenly bright. My guess is that this was caused by the linolium floor and white walls and ceiling.

After I got bored of this I got back to my friends room with little incidence (just trying hard to get back on to the couch in a cluttered dark small room. I didn't want to turn on the lights to awaken my friend). Watching the movie, I realised hardly any time had passed at all (maybe 5 minutes, 10 at the most, where as it felt like hours in the bathroom).

1:20. move ahead a few minutes. I was extremely disinterested in the movie and needed some way to please myself. I became interested in knowing what sharp pains felt like while on this drug. I found a safety pin I had in my sweater and started poking my self over my chest (after I had taken my shirt off). This feeling pleased me emmensly and I continued poking my chest for some time.

I had to pee again and I put the safety pin aside and got up. I took off my pants so I was only in my boxers (for comfort). When I opened the door of my friends room I heard a very strange and slightly scary noise. It took me some time to realize it was from 1 or more of his 3 dogs (2 little mutts and 1 big black one) upstairs drinking from their bowls. That part didn't bothered me but I was scared that seeing a dog might make me freak out so I hurried into the bathroom.

After I peed I stood up (I sat down because I was too wobbly at this point, maybe an effect of the PCP). When I took a step, the ripples set out again but bounced off the walls and headed straight back for my foot. As soon as they all collided with my foot, my foot seemed to swell up to giant size and turn blackish. It was incredibly painful and I fought with all my strength to keep it from traveling up my leg and hopefully push it out (I was just keeping my fists clenched, teeth gritted, and foot planted firmly. I was standing almost as if I was about to take off running, putting all my weight on my 'infected' foot). I continued to fight with this black substance for quite some time, each of us gaining an inch or 2 then losing it. Eventually it took control of me. It swept up my leg and into my chest and at this point things became a total mind trip.

*It might also be important(or not) to note that now I have no clue what time it was, I only know I finally fell asleep around 6 in the morning*

As the thing 'infected' me, I felt stronger and wiser. More powerful. I sensed I had more control over the universe and the minds of people. I put myself into a trance like state (still standing in the bathroom), with my eyes closed. I found myself in an alley behind a man who couldn't see me. I stepped up closer to him and plunged my hand directly into his back, grabbing hold of his spinal colume. I pulled it out of his back, his head still attached at the top. I had killed this man. I found another man and started taking out organs one by one by plunging my hand into his body, ripping his stomach apart in the process. It was so incredibly fun and I thought I was actually doing this, but without the possibility of getting caught because of my power.

This next piece I am a little fuzzy over. I somehow remeber folding inside myself. Just bending over and twisting in that direction until I somehow came to be standing right side up again. I still had my eyes closed though and this was all in my head.

There was a lot more to that experiance of killing and dismembering then I can remember because it has been over a year but I just remember it was a very strong and powerful feeling I was enjoying, and one of the funner moments of the trip.

I decided to see what else I could do with my powers. There was this beautiful girl I had a crush on who was my age. We had gone out for a few months and we had been the first sexual experiance for each of us (just using hands and mouths on each other, nothing more). But we had broken up. I thought strongly of her and all the sudden I woke up in her bed. I could only see faintly threw the moonlight shining in her window but I could tell I was in her body, controlling it. I did not sense her presense at all, as if she was still sleeping in her subconscience. I decided I wanted to know what an orgasm felt from the female body. I took off my bra and panties and started rubbing my clitorus.

The feeling was so direct and pleasent that I was convinced totally that this wasn't just the trip, that LSD actually unlocked secret doorways to travel through in our minds. Connecting our minds on a higher level, leaving our bodies on a lower one. I felt that because my mind was on this higher levels, and the minds of most people were sleeping, that they would not be aware of I 'borrowed' their bodies and that is what allowed me to do what I was doing.

Back to the experiance. I started inserting fingers into my vagina and it was so great feeling. I continued at this until I had an intense orgasm. It felt like it was the first time I've ever had an orgasm which probably had to do with the body I was in. I then got up and walked around her room for awhile naked, still ocassionally holding my breasts or ass and enjoying the body as much as if I was myself again and holding hers. After awhile I decided to let her have it back and climbed into bed again and closed my eyes. I immediatly came to, standing in my boxers in the bathroom. Everything was still bright. I checked for ejaculate stains in my boxers to see if I might have actually had an orgasm but I didn't. It was truely all in my mind, and in her body.

Anyway I walked back to my friends room and the movie credits were rolling at this point so with the faint light, I found a piece of cardboard and a pencil and drew a face and body on this cardboard. I had a name for him but I forget it now. I was trying desperately to get him to talk to me but it wouldn't, which really disappointed me. I then laid on my back and started poking myself with the pin again. I started moving the pin around my body, to my arms, hands, cheeks and nose, forhead, lips and tongue. I even tried poking my testicles and the head of my penis. It was very 'sharp' but also pleasent in a way. I then turned the tv to the channel that tells you whats on for the next hour and a half (well it came on that channel when I turned the VCR off) and with this bluish light(no sound) I watched my skin as I poked it.

I wanted to draw blood so I picked a spot on my arm and pressed the needle down deeply. When I pulled it out a gusher of blood came spurting out like a freshly tapped vein of oil like you see in cartoons. Then the blood settled down and formed a pool which pulled itself into a drop centered over the poked hole. Then the blood started seeping down into the skin and spreading around the patterns of the hair and mini-crevices of my flesh.

Then it was gone. Suddenly I was sober again. I looked at my arm and it was only a speck of red..not even bleeding.

I turned off the TV and lay down. At this moment the acid reaffirmed its presense in me and all the lights in the room, from the flashing lighthouse shing in the window to the lights on the tv and vcr started swimming around me. The vcr/tv lights became a UFO and the lighthouse lights ended up becoming 'light' fish swimming around the top of the room. I watched all this for awhile but then I had to pee again.

As I stood up I could think semi-clearly finally and I felt groggy and my mind felt misty. I didn't even feel totally connected to reality at this time. I stood in front of the toilet and started to pee, looking out the window directly in front of me at the lights of houses across the bay. Then a masked face appeared in front of the window..then another..then ANOTHER!

There was three of these masked men, wearing black clokes and a perverted warped version of the scream-movie mask. The mask was a lot longer, reaching mid chest and coming to a point, with a slit running from the point vertically up to the middle of the mask. A black dot for each eye and that was it. Hooded black cloaks and that mask. I just stared at the 3 faces for awhile and then looked down and pulled my boxers over my penis.

As soon as I looked straight up, one of the masked men just sort of 'swept' aside, and I got the feeling it was coming after me. I did not feel safe anymore so I hurridly went into my friends room again and closed the door. I looked out the window to see if the faces would appear but became intranced in the light of the lighthouse. It's rotation caused it to appear once every 4-5 seconds and everytime it would get brighter, then after it lit up the sky would slowly get darker, this continued until I lay back down and started playing with the pin for awhile, poking myself. This got boring so I picked up the cardboard man.

I started talking to him even if he wasn't going to talk back. I continued a lengthy discussion with him for some time about my feelings and life and how my trip was, telling him of the murder experiances I had just earlier. I was feeling slightly tired so I decided I would go to sleep.

After laying in bed for some time, unable to fall asleep, I realised what was wrong. I couldn't let the cardboard man live! He would be a doorway to this upper level of existence and he could only exist when a human was at this level. If I was sober and he was around, it would have negative effects of reality! The thoughts were so frightening to me at the time that I quickly sat up and grabbed him, then took a safety pin. I told him how sorry I was and that I had to do it, even though I didn't want to. He still wouldn't talk to me. I said my final farewells and drove the pin through his chest. I layed him on the table beside the couch and, content, fell asleep.

The next morning I awoke not remembering much of this. Then as I turned over and saw the strange cardboard thing with a drawing of a man on it with a safety pin stuck in its chest, most of my trip came back. During that morning more and more came back and I kept relating it all to my friend, who seemed really disinterested.

I have been wanted to do acid again since then, to finally experiance a true trip that would lead me to question my existense and ponder the questions of reality. This trip was basically nothing more then a few wierd visuals and one really odd 'out of body' experiance and, while really intreging, it was not what I truly wanted. I blame the experiance on the bad environment and lack of 'trip toys' that I had access to. I have yet to find more acid besides getting dooped into buying plain paper, though I have searched high and low since this experiance.

I want to think I learned something from this, but I don't think I could have. The experiance was nothing more to me then a vacation from normality, when I was searching for a different path of reality. Hopefully I will find another chance to experiance this wonderful drug the way I really want to.

The one thing I don't understand is how high I became off of only one tab. The only thing I can guess is that it was either very strong, or if what a friend told me, I actually took a quadruple tab, because he told me most tabs are usually the size of a pencil eraser but square, while mine was the size of a medium sized postage stamp.

Anyway, I have done more research into the drug, and into spirituality and psycology in general. I know more about myself and have a clearer understanding of how I personally view life and the mind. Hopefully this knowledge will benefit whatever future experiances I have with LSD, hopefully soon :).

OH, I just realised I did learn something, actually two things from this experiance. Killing can be fun without the prisons of morality, judgement, and fear, and women must have a ton more fun then men do masterbating!!

Exp Year: 2002	ExpID: 24295

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Dec 7, 2006	Views: 27,984

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LSD (2) : Combinations (3), First Times (2), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 8 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   124 lb

I know this is a VERY long story, but it is one I typed up the day after having my first high-dose acid trip.  I copied and paste this into here with no editing and no revising.  Therefore, this is the exact account of my first high-dose acid trip from right after it happened.  I didn't go into acid in hopes of getting high as a party drug.  I went into it for a spiritual experience.  I am part Native American and proud of my heritage so I have studied the use of psychedelic drugs to invoke spirit quests.  Before I paste in the experience of the acid trip I will tell a little bit about my background, the setting, my mood, and any other information I think will help those of you thinking about entering the world of LSD.

My first real acid trip took place exactly 10 days after my 19th birthday, which is in July.  I am a straight-A student, graduated high school with Honors.  I am very studious and interested in psychology, science, quantum physics, chemistry, history, and philosophy.  I’ve always been a loner, never enjoyed parties or social gatherings.  I have always loved nature and animals so I planned to go out on a nice day for the acid trip and maybe look for snakes and turtles in a forest.

The drugs I have previously done were marijuana, alcohol, and cocaine.  Never really cared for alcohol because it made me numb and apathetic, never really cared for cocaine but it was addictive.  I enjoyed marijuana mostly because it heightened my senses, made me more aware of my surroundings, and exaggerated everything.  I was in a bad mood on the day of my first high-dose acid trip because I was being harassed by my parents all morning about how my checking account somehow had $-56.  Luckily, when my friends came over I calmed down because they’re people I have always been very comfortable with.  Enough of the background information, here’s the story of an experience I will never forget...

2:14am

As I am writing this, I am coming down from the most spiritual and life-changing experience that can possibly happen.  Still coming down so this story may seem a bit confusing because my mind is racing and everything I'm looking at is moving, including the words on the screen.  This experience is one which you can not possibly comprehend unless you have actually experienced it.  Now I have taken a few hits of acid before, the most was 4 but it was really weak acid so all I got was a body high and slight movement in my visuals.  Slight trails, everything was more vivid, I could notice everything.  Everything was clear and my senses were heightened.  I felt really spaced out too so talking to people was really confusing too.  But that’s about it.

At around 4:30pm I took 8 hits of white fluff acid. I have heard it is the strongest acid you can get nowadays.  I was with one of my best friends, who I will call D, his girlfriend S, and my friend K.  After we took the acid, S drove us to the package store so D could get some alcohol.  After we got back to my house I saw my parents leave so we went in my backyard and smoked some pot out of my glass bowl.  D and I got pretty stoned.  Then as I was sitting on my porch with my friends having a cigarette, I felt a slight shift in reality.  Like I was slowly being transported into a new world.

Everything was so much more vivid.  I could hear every bird, every gust of wind, the stereo was blasting out the song Jerusalem by a stoner metal band called Sleep and it was making me space out and since I was relaxed I started to get tingly all over my body, a feeling of bugs being under the skin.  But it wasn’t like that, I knew there were no bugs under my skin so I didn’t freak out.  Then I realized the feeling felt like the loving fingertips of a woman tickling me all over.  I was getting slight trails but nothing hard yet, it was only as if I waved my hand in front of a computer screen.  I looked at the paintjob on the side of my house.  I could see every brush stroke from when it was painted.  It kind of looked like it was bulging out a little bit.  Then my friends decided to go for a swim...

My friend D kept insisting that we go swimming.  At first I didn’t want to, but he said it would be good for us because I have a solar heater in my pool so it was like bathwater.  It was scorching hot outside and the water was in the high 80s.  I went inside for my swimsuit and I felt really weird.  Very spaced out and confused.  I forgot what I went inside for so I went back outside and I saw my friends in the pool.  I think I remember getting a swimsuit for K too because she left it here from last time but I don’t remember when that came into play.

I went back inside to put on my swimsuit and I went outside.  Everything was so much more vivid and I knew the acid was kicking in, but I had no idea what I was about to experience.  I knew I was stoned but I'm pretty used to being stoned, and it never felt like this before.  I felt like the wind kind of, like I was a part of the air.  I stood on my pool deck and stared at the water for a little bit noticing every little ripple in the water.  My friends kept encouraging me to jump in.  I knew it would be too much of a shock to jump in so I slowly climbed in.  All I can remember that D said was 'come on dude jump in the pool.  I'm telling you, this will be the craziest experience you have ever had.'  As I was swimming around, and going underwater, things gradually started to get weirder.  Not really any visuals yet, just very tingly, stoned, spaced out, confused, my senses were heightened and I could hear and see everything so clearly and it was all so crisp.  Then things started to get really weird...

I put on these goggles that made everything have a purple/red tint.  Because of the suction of the goggles it felt like my eyeballs were getting pulled out.  But I forced myself to think 'It's only the effects of a drug, and it will wear off.  Your eyes aren’t really getting sucked out.'  I could still feel it but I accepted it because I knew it was just my imagination.  I went underwater and I could see every little movement and how the water was distorting the bottom and sides of the pool.  Then once I came out of the water I could not see a thing, everything was so dark and purple so I took off the goggles.

Everything was as colorful and exactly how they looked when I had my goggles on before.  With a purple/red tint.  I felt a little part of my thumb growing so I looked and I could see a blister form right before my eyes and it was growing.  I looked down at my chest and could see my skin change color from the normal skin color to having patterns in kind of pale dot shapes.  Then I could see the goose bumps grow out of my skin.  I got out of the water because I realized the blister was most likely from the chlorine in the water.  Then I looked down at the grain in the wood and it started waving, and kind of swirling together.  The spaces between the pieces of wood that made up the deck were also kind of waving, looked like water kind of.  Then I looked out into my backyard...

When I looked out into my backyard, the tool shed looked very out of place.  It looked like a small house.   Then as I noticed the surroundings I could see how it fit in.  The picket fence in the back looked like it was swaying slowly side to side, as if dancing in the wind.  The house looked like it was blowing up like a balloon and deflating back to regular size (with an indent in the center), only to inflate again.  As I looked at the point at the top of the roof, I could see my house kind of swaying slowly from side to side.

I looked at the grass, every blade was moving like it was alive.  Every object was breathing just like my house, the tool shed which made me think of a dwarf's house, the pool deck, the pool, the fence, the neighbor’s tool shed which was right behind the picket fence with a lot of plant life next to it which was moving like it was alive.  The tree’s leaves had a weird purplish-orange design on them and the tree seemed to stand out.

Except my friends looked completely normal, a bit too normal.  D told me to look at the tree because it was colorful.  I was so confused because as I was looking at the tree D kept telling me to look and I kept saying 'I'm looking at it man' and he said 'no dude, look at it.'  So while I was staring at this tree I heard my friends laughing at me and I felt retarded because I could not understand what was going on.  Then D tapped my shoulder and pointed to the tree he was talking about.  One that was across the street and when I looked at it, I could see every leaf move like it was going in small circles and it looked like flowers were growing out of the middle of it.

I decided to go inside to dry off and change because I was cold (even though it was supposed to be scorching hot out.)  The ladder to get down from the deck was breathing so I had to have my friend help me get down the ladder, the back porch and the stairs that went up on it were breathing.  The floral patterns on my walls in the kitchen looked like they were growing, and the grain designs on the dinner table were moving and swirling to form shapes that looked like faces you would see in an animated scary movie.  I went into the bathroom and the walls, the hamper, the sink, the shower, and the toilet were breathing. Every design on the floor tile and the walls were growing, swirling, and swaying.

I looked in the mirror and I could see every little detail of my face and it looked like it was moving a bit, so I talked to myself in the mirror just to tell myself it was just a drug which will wear off and I'll be fine.  Don't worry… the image didn’t talk back and I knew it was just a mirror.  I was just trying to calm myself down because I didn't expect what was happening to me.  It was a bit overwhelming because it was hitting me pretty hard, and it was my first time really tripping.  Then I noticed the trails...

I heard about trails and the times that I have done low doses of acid I would imagine myself to have slight trails, even when I smoked too much pot I would imagine it too.  But right now, in my bathroom, I had a trail.  I knew it.  I moved my hand across my vision and saw 50 hands spread out like a fan, slowly fading away like it was dissolving from the beginning of the fan until all that was left was my real hand.  I just fooled around making crazy trails in the bathroom until I decided to go back outside.

Everything in the kitchen was moving.  The objects were inflating and deflating and kind of swaying from side to side as if dancing, and all I could think of was the scene in Evil Dead 2 where the house was alive everything in it was laughing (although nothing really was laughing during my experience, they were just dancing).  The patterns on everything were growing and/or swirling.  The top of my table looked like the top of a crooked tree stump, but somehow it belonged in the middle of my kitchen and it was on the four table legs in the exact center of my kitchen.

As I walked toward the door I stared at the table and everything was getting darker and the patterns on the table were swirling to form the faces even more.  The floral designs on the walls were growing and sprouting more flowers.  I went outside and sat down on the porch swing with K, while D and S were sitting at the table.  Everything was moving just like how it was earlier but stronger.  I looked at the kitchen window which has a design of two birds on it and I saw the tail of one of them start to curl up.

My mind was moving so fast so I told my friends I wanted to go for a walk, go on an adventure.  I didn't want to waste my trip just sitting around, I wanted to go experience the world because I felt like I was a child again and I was experiencing everything for the first time.  Plus a walk would do me good because it would help to clear my mind.  But my friends told me no because it was too hot outside.  I didn't feel the heat but apparently it was a very hot summer's day.  Then S drove us to an old graveyard…

On the way to the graveyard, everything was moving.  Being inside the car I felt very claustrophobic because it looked like the sides were closing in on me and every pattern around me was moving, although my friends looked perfectly normal, everything around them was alive.  I looked out the windshield and the road looked like it was curved up in the middle like a big hill and the trees were growing into the middle of the road like we were in a rainforest.

The street lights and what looked like towering giant pillars that connected the power lines were trailing so I could see one coming toward us right after the other and everything was crooked and looked like it was melting down toward the street.  I decided to lay down in K's lap and stared out the window and was overwhelmed.  All of a sudden I got tunnel vision and all I could see was a thousand street lights and power-line poles coming toward me and I felt some bubbles pop in my head so I sat up and held onto K.

She held onto me to calm me down.  I had to get out of that car.  D noticed me bugging out so he put on some relaxing 60's music and I was able to sit back, relax, and watch the crooked melting street lights, the growing trees with spinning leaves, the breathing street that looked like a balloon inflating in the center.  Every once in a while I would tell him to turn down the music because I would see flashes that went along with the beat of the music and it bugged me out a little bit.  But once he turned the music down I snapped back into reality and he turned it up again.

When we got to the graveyard, I sat down on the grass in front of a statue and smoked another bowl with D.  Then I looked up and noticed all the gravestones were crooked and looked kind of like they were slowly dancing back and forth, the ground looked like it was breathing and the pathways looked like they were bulging out, like big hills that formed crooked and disoriented paths.  The faces on the statues seemed to change into skulls and sometimes just to have a different expression.  The leaves on the trees were spinning in little circles and growing, kind of looked like a painting.  Then for some reason, which I can not remember, we went back to the car and went to a beach which led to an abandoned town...

At the beach we walked along the path, I was still getting the same visuals as I described earlier, they were just a lot stronger now and it seemed like there were huge waves going across the ground I was walking on.  I felt my skin begin to swirl too.  I could feel every grain of sand going into my shoes and I felt like I was being pulled into the ground because I was walking on sand.

Everything was moving.  The birds trailed and looked like there were at least 10 flying by and fading away.  I could see every bug fly by, the moths were beautiful.  The birds were beautiful.  The straw ground looked like it was swirling until the colors would mix together and look like small animals running around on the path.  Then I noticed that they were little fiddler crabs running around.  I saw a bird flying around in circles above me and it looked like it was pissed off and wanted to kill me.

D told me that I was near its nest so it would dive-bomb me.  I was bugging out a bit because I thought the bird would attack me so I was clutching onto K as she guided me out of the danger zone.  I started getting a bit paranoid and thought my friends thought of me as retarded because they weren't tripping.  As we were walking, I kind of left them behind and walked on my own because I knew I was in my own little world.

Then I saw a bird fly through the air and it split into about 5 birds and flew in all different directions.  I was amazed by it and I said to D, 'Holy shit! Did you see that?  Those birds flew and spread out, there has to be at least 50 birds out here.'  Then D laughed and pointed out the reality to me, 'Dude, there are only 2 birds.  Look.  One, two.  You’re just tripping face.'  I said 'I know, and I love it.  I want more.'  He told me that he was tripping face too because he took 6 hits, but he's experienced with it so he can control it.

D called me his brother in psychedelics and we sat down on the beach and smoked another bowl talking about how we want to take an even higher dose next time.  As we were walking on the wooden bridge, every piece of wood that held it together was crooked and swaying like it was dancing.  The trees and every little plant was growing and moving like it was alive and about to devour us.  Not a harmful devourment, more of a peaceful one.  Like we were going through a pathway into another world.  The houses in the abandoned town were inflating and deflating, everything looked bent.  Similar to the animation in the cartoon Rocko's Modern Life.  I don’t remember much after that of what went on in the abandoned town.  But I remember the walk back...

The ground was like water, I could feel it like it was an earthquake and the waves were going across the ground.  The whole world felt like it was a seesaw and I could feel my own body waving around like it was moving with the water-like ground.  I could feel every part of my body swirling into itself.  I looked out onto the water and could see huge tidal waves going from one side to the other.  I could see everything getting darker with the sun going down.  I could hear every sound.  When we got back in the car, my friend John called my cell phone and the way he was talking I could not understand anything he was saying.  It was like he was talking a different language, which I could only partially understand.  So everything he was saying was mixing together and confusing the hell out of me.  So I told him I'd meet him at the fast food restaurant Wendy's.

On the way to Wendy's, D and I smoked another bowl to heighten the trip.  When we got to Wendy's I was getting very claustrophobic because I was stuck in the car and they wouldn't let me out because D and S were arguing and ignoring the fact that I had to get out of the car.  The insides of the car looked like it was closing in on me and the paranoia caused by their arguing made me think everyone was pissed off at me, like I ruined everyone’s night by tripping.  John saw us there and saw me bugging out so he told D that I had to get out of the car.

When I got out, K and I went into Wendy's and the confusion was too much.  The letters on the menu were swirling and waving around, each letter was dancing.  Everything was moving around me and John's girlfriend, Rachel, asked me for 7 cents.  I walked around in circles around the restaurant looking through my pockets for change, then I looked up and noticed Rachel and the person at the register were both staring at me.  I apologized for not having any change then I left.  John tried to talk to me again and I just wanted him to leave me alone because I felt so stupid because I couldn't understand him.

I got back in the car and we went to the playground where I went to elementary school.  I saw some old friends from high school and I was happy to see them but they knew I was on drugs so they laughed and said it was typical of me.  But I told them I took 8 hits of acid and smoked some pot and one of them said sarcastically 'wow, you really know how to mix your drugs.  That’s a GREAT combination.'  So I walked away from them because I had a feeling that they hated me for doing drugs.

D and I went out into the field and lay down to stare at the stars swirling around and moving.  Then we decided to walk behind the school because it was dark and there were only a few lights and a forest was behind it.  We were watching the patterns on the brick wall move, the trees dance, the leaves swirl, the lights of the field were overwhelming because they seemed so bright I can only compare them to the sun.

Then when we walked back, I was in my own little world and not paying attention to my friends because I didn't hear them and I was busy watching the brick walls of the school pulsate and wave as a few of the bricks started to bulge out, like they were loose and just being pushed out from the inside.  Then all of a sudden I heard S yell 'What the hell did you do?!'  I got paranoid because I thought she was screaming at me.  Then I snapped out of my fantasy world and saw there was a cut on D's arm.  S said again, 'What the hell did you guys do back there?!  We heard a lot of noise.'  I was so paranoid thinking everyone was pissed off at me, so I told them that all we did was look at the scenery.

I was being honest too.  I don't remember him getting a cut.  The bad vibes of D and S's arguing made me want to go home with just K.  So I told D and S that I would meet them at my house because I wanted to walk home.  K walked with me and I had the same visuals, except it was night so I couldn't see the leaves swirling.  I was wishing it was brighter because I wanted to see everything move.  But things were still breathing and bulging out, I was still getting slight trails as if I moved my hand in front of a computer screen but the images of my hand stayed a few seconds longer than it normally would if I did that.

When we got back to my house, D and S weren't there so I thought they went home.  Paranoia made me believe they got pissed off at me and left.  I was also kind of pissed because D had my bowl, my pot, my lighter, and I had no cigarettes left.  K and I went inside.  Since I was kind of used to the trip by now, I was able to handle dealing with my parents.  They didn't suspect a thing.  I handled it by walking inside with my friend, saying “Hey mom” and walking straight to my room with K.

When I was in my room I heard something hit the window so I looked outside and D was standing there.  I went out to talk to him and he said they had to go home.  I went back inside with K.  I had a hell of a time and she definitely is the coolest girl in the world!  No further details about that situation though.  She drove me to the store to pick up cigarettes and she was playing this awesome trance music in her car stereo, which really heightened the trip.

There was a song about a guy who had to get used to not living next door to 'Alice' so I assumed he was singing about LSD.  That song made everything look kind of like it was dancing to it.  Then there was a techno remix of the theme from Never Ending Story which made everything seem like it was smiling.  Eventually she had to leave.  I was still tripping so I told her to call me when she got home.  It seemed like an eternity so I was getting very nervous and afraid that maybe something happened to her.  I tried to call her twice but there was no answer and I was only thinking the worst.  Then I went outside for a cigarette and she finally called me.

I talked to her for a bit and it definitely calmed me down, and then I went to bed because I was all alone.  I spaced out to The Beatles and Jefferson Airplane to watch the objects in my room move slightly to the music, and then I went on the computer to start typing this.  I wasn’t really tripping anymore, it just seemed like everything was off and I felt burnt out and exhausted.  I had to stop typing this about halfway through and I went back to bed and just tried to sleep.  I looked at my clock which was not moving, and even seemed to go backward a minute, so I unplugged it and eventually fell asleep.

Now it is the next day, I definitely feel a difference in reality.  My perspective has changed so much.  Everything is clear and I am more aware of everything.  I took a drive to the bank to fix the problem with my checking account and I was more aware of every little thing that was going on and I could notice the patterns in everything more and how everything kind of connects.

All I can say is: acid is my favorite drug.  I don't do acid to get messed up.  I never thought of it like that.  Before I have ever done acid I always viewed it as a spiritual experience that I wanted to try.  Now that I have done it, I believe everyone who can handle it should try it at least once in their lifetime.  I thought I could understand acid after reading and researching it to no end.  But once I actually experienced it, I realized that I knew nothing about it.

Exp Year: 2006	ExpID: 54620

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Dec 13, 2006	Views: 34,245

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LSD (2) : First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 1
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (cookie / food)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   165 lb

My girlfriend and I have been exlusive, and in a serious relationship, for a good long while now.  At the time (about two months ago, in May 2004) we'd been dating seriously for about 11 months, almost a year.  I love her more than I love life itself.  I'm most definitely what they call 'the romantic type', and she is pretty moderate in that department compared to me, but definitely has some 'romatic' qualities to her.

I waited to submit this, because this experience is very personal to me and very personal to her.  Neither of us have ever even told someone in person about this in great detail (all we've really said was, 'We tripped together on acid, and it was simply amazing,' and all that kinda basic jazz).

Having had some experiences with tripping, and having found her to be someone I've become very, very close to, our plan was to trip together on LSD.  I've done mushrooms a few times, and acid twice before this trip.  I've also got a lot of drinking experience under my belt, and of course have smoked lots of weed.  Out of all the things, acid is my favorite and easily the one I find most euphoric.  My girlfriend had taken mushrooms twice before, and she wanted to try acid after all the stories I'd told her about it, so she tried acid (and I was with her for some of her trip, and she handled it perfectly and enjoyed it like I did).  She told me how she felt about it, and obviously she knew how I felt about it.

Our objective was to have a romantic, LSD-induced experience together.  We both know that the mindset, setting, etc. are all very key factors in the trip.  Anyway, onto the story.  We have good friends out there, often with connections, so if anyone is curious, it was with one sugarcube each, which we were told was 'very potent'.  I got two from a friend I know I can trust to give me exactly what I need.  The dose turned out to be perfect, like this entire trip turned out to be. My girlfriend and I dosed about two hours after breakfast, at about an hour 'til noon or so.  Our plan was to start off listening to music together, have a romantic dinner, and possibly go to the local park at a time when we can be alone later on.

We were just listening to music right after we dosed, and I knew pretty quickly that the acid was better than I experienced before (certainly was much more potent).  We were sitting on a couch, holding hands, with the lighting as dim as it could've possibly been during a considerably sunny day in the broad daylight (it is pretty dark inside the house naturally).  We had some tapestries on the wall, and they gradually became a little more vibrant.  The music became more vibrant.  My girlfriend is very beautiful, and I can honestly say that she really is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, and she was also becoming more vibrant in my vision and mind.  I told her how I was already starting to feel it and she said she felt the same way.

Now, I always had felt connected to her, more than anyone else in this world, but on acid, it was REALLY intense.  It might even be the most intense I've ever felt in my life.  I really can't describe it exactly as I was feeling it.  The music, also, made it a lot more intense.  I felt like acid had brought me to a very small, euphoric, perfect, but temporary world which only her and I had been occupying.  Not just physically, but mentally; I wasn't even thinking about anything or anyone in this world but her.  Never in my life have I felt so close to someone.  Peter Gabriel, who had some songs we were listening to at the time, said something along the lines of, 'Sometimes, you will see a couple so close together that it becomes hard to distinguish which one is which...and between the two, their two worlds become one, in what we can identify as the Secret World...' for the track 'Secret World' on his Growing Up Live Tour.  This applied perfectly to the experience.

It was bizarre, how I knew we both were feeling the same way, but it was all perfect.  The word 'high' is a rather genuine way to describe it.  It was the ultimate high.  It justified my having lived my life up to that point, and living afterwards to have the memory in my head for the rest of my life.

We began to make love, which has never, before or since, for me OR her been either more intense, more euphoric, or more amazing.  Afterwards we held each other very closely, and talked about how we BOTH had NEVER felt so happy or so 'high' or 'ultimate' in our lives.  Right when I was about to say it, she told me that it was the best experience of her life, and if she had died tomorrow, she would do so having a life that she'd never trade for anything in the world because of this experience.  I'll never forget the words.

I hesitated, because I was amazed, because I understood her perfectly even though all she could use was mere words to describe an obviously immense, ineffable experience.  One cliched way of portraying romance in movies and such is to say, 'Words can never encompass the real depth of what I feel for you,' or something along those lines.  It was EXACTLY how we both felt.  But we still managed to understand each other.  I then told her I felt exactly the same way and that I need nothing more in this world, and no matter what exists outside of the experience that we have essentially created here, I don't need anything else except her beautiful face right with me.

We did end up going to the park as soon as it got dark out, and went to as secluded a place as possible.  Fortunately, it was warm enough out :).  We made love again.  We even slept there for the night, with only blankets to wear (it was reasonably private because it's surrounded by foliage and trees and such).

She woke me up at about 6:00 AM and we figured it might be a good idea to get up and get dressed.  We did so and assessed over breakfast how amazing an experience we just had, and how awesome it was that we'd have it for the rest of our lives.  She and I have since never been closer or imagined ever being closer to another human being.

I'm not too far removed from popping the question in the same spot in the park.  I cannot imagine ever leaving her.  And this experience has completely solidified her in my mind as the only person, only thing in this world I will ever need.  The acid was amazingly perfect.  The weather was amazingly perfect.  Everything came together perfectly.  Absolutely nothing went wrong.

Perhaps nothing ever could.

Exp Year: 2004	ExpID: 35542

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 21, 2007	Views: 26,497

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LSD (2) : General (1), Glowing Experiences (4), Music Discussion (22), Sex Discussion (14), Relationships (44), Personal Preparation (45), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 1.5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   70 kg

After getting lost and spending a couple hours trying to double back on ourselves we arrived at the venue of a doof (psy trance bush festival) by about 4:30. Before settling down for a bit we decided to explore the venue and bumped into a couple of friends who we brought back to the campsite and smoked a bit of weed with to relax into the beautiful surrounding scenery. The weed helped set the mood as we all sat around feeling relaxed, joking about the irony and beauty of life. Fast forward to chilling out and getting to know a few doofers it was starting to get dark so we headed in to see a Shpongle set by Simon Posford. This is where I was undecided on which or whether I would be taking drugs. My friend ended up buying a few tabs so we split them between us. So apparently we ate approximately 200-300ug of LSD according to the dealer and other doofers/users opinions (of course you never really know, but it's nice to have at least some idea).

Within about 10 minutes I began noticing slight visual disturbances and a increase in energy, I began developing an acid tongue (where the flavour of my mouth changes according to the taste the acid often leaves behind caused by its perceptual disturbance). I sat down with my friend talking about our friendship and our relationship as I came up, what motivates us about our life and why we are where we are. Before I knew it, an hour had gone by (I didn’t have a clock or any reference of time on me, so I don’t have any real idea of how long anything took other then my usual psychedelic suspicion based on dj set times and the position of the moon in the sky). I suddenly snap out of a trance to realise I've become lost by the trails and patterns the fire twirlers have left behind as they dance in front of me. This is where it hits me, and I realise the acid is beginning to peak as I've just started experiencing some fairly strong ego loss.

I am suddenly full of energy and decide that I have to move, or else the excess energy might turn foul. I stand up and realise that my inner child feels a lot smaller then my outside body, like there is a child wanting to bounce around inside this huge body that doesn't quite make sense with my perceived ego that appears to keep changing in size and significance. Before I got used to the constant sensation of feeling 10 feet tall and on stilts, and then 2 feet tall, stumbling all around the place was inevitable. I quickly told my friend I had to work off some of my energy and needed to do this on my own, paranoid about offending her, I tried to explain but just decided it was easier I just walked off and if I needed to I would explain my mindstate later.

I’m walking around and the energy within me is quite intense that I’m actually shaking a fair bit, so I dance around like a hippy with too much energy and no stern control over his limbs, before heading out into this beautiful open grassy field between the arenas and bump into another one of my friends. We sit down and have a chat about our perspectives on life and the psychedelic headspace begins to react as we start communicating through the pronunciation of the words we use rather then the words themselves. We even began conversing without opening our mouths, in a sort of body language/aura/empathic form of transcendental understanding.

The trip was starting to hit me really hard now (about 2.5 hours in), I am starting to see peoples history's and futures as they walk past us laying on the grass. It's as if, I can see them contemplating their own existence (probably because they're on a dose of LSD), but for example, looking at one person walk past, it was as though I knew if someone had come from overseas and could see them questioning what Australia meant to them, what the earth meant to them and what they planned on doing in the future to attain a higher sense of belonging to the earth (It felt as though I could travel into their memories and feel some Irish heritage, I hadn't spoken to them, but I got a strong Irish vibe from the thought sensations that they provoked with in me.

Typically on a good dose of psychedelics I can look at people walk past and as when they're by themselves I seem to understand them better, when they're in a group, often the conversation is most probably superficial and therefore harder to grab hold of their inner feelings through an aura, body language, posture/facial expressions. Although even then, as I saw at the doof, some individuals were walking with people while the others were talking and it was as if you could see their chakras as they got lost in self contemplation while their friends talked consistently.

I was laying on the grass next to my friend on this nice lush green slope looking at the trees. It was intense watching them as appeared to fold into themselves and form into huge fractal patterns, overlapping and swallowing up fractal patterns in the rest of my surrounding environment. I looked up at the sky and watched the clouds making beautiful fractal rainbows that shone down on my face. I looked at my friend and I could see 3 different coloured cone perspectives of my friend, red green and blue. His face appeared to mutate into rainbows between these three coloured perspectives like I had just seen happen to the clouds, kind of like wearing 3D glasses. We start communicating quite vibrantly again without talking, almost as if it was all entirely telepathic (if you have the imagination to believe in that, as I sure did in that mindstate).

I started exploring the universe as if it was merely two opposites that have created everything, light and darkness... chaos and order. I feel myself leaving my body I am completely ready to die at this point as it feels as though death is just a part of the never ending cycle of life. Death can be treated as a blessing. I am happy and content I may repeat this life forever but at least I know I can enjoy it, and that is what i'm doing right now and will make sure I do it if it's my destiny to live this life or any other life for the rest of eternity. There is no reason to be stressed and fearful, as if you don't fear anything, you can't be afraid of death. If you don't fear death, there's nothing to be stressed about.

It felt as though I'd opened the door to the edge of the universe and I could easily step over and reach enlightenment. Although my body would be left behind as a vegetable, my friend seemed to understand exactly what I was thinking about. He looked over at me and tells me 'don't'. I think “fuck that, as if I’d leave all these beautiful people behind without giving them any direction on how to find this place, or sharing my findings and tell other people that this place exists”. My friend said 'thanks' as if he could see what I saw or something along those lines, It didn't feel as though he quite felt what I was feeling, but the energy I felt coming from his body felt quite intensely profound, but perhaps just in a slightly different direction.

Our other friends saw us laying on the grass and decided to head over to join us in our peacefulness but it felt as though they didn't quite reach the same understanding again (they weren’t tripping nearly as hard though and seemed as though they still held a fear of letting go and succumbing to the full power of their trip ... bearing in mind that their dose was also significantly lower, being inexperienced and only taking half a tab) I had virtually no mindfuck but was able to understand the empathy of everyone around especially when these two guys walked up and made a joke about the two friends who weren’t tripping without even using their mouth. The fact that I seemed to understand the humour in their minds without them saying anything, created such an orgasmic sensation in my mind.

I was one with everything and was trying to work out that if the universe is yin and yang, whether I was the light in this world and brought repetition or whether I was darkness and killed repetition (if that makes sense). It made me question homosexuality and whether, homosexuality brought yin or yang to this world. Not that there is a direct difference between 'light' and 'dark' but it felt important to contemplate what differentiated me from the others around me, if anything. Neither light or darkness is evil in this world, they both just exist and if everyone was to avoid being pulled into other peoples light/darkness and was able to appreciate their own yin/yang, enlightenment would be reached. Just like chaos is synonymous with order, you can't have nothingness without infinity.

I understood my gender and reasons for procreation as unecessary (as I don't necessarily feel that homosexuality is a choice as such, and the fact it exists in nature suggests that it could perhaps have some spiritual hard wiring within me. It was as though, my role as a gay man is meant to prevent excessive procreation of life, or perhaps push it further by enforcing higher natural selection. As we humans are a cell that have become so evolutionarily advanced that we are able to rapidly multiply like cancer and are destroying this cell known as earth… The ratio of humans to animals and plants reached ridiculous proportions already, and I don’t deserve the pleasure of repeating the cycle and bringing another human into this world that may not be able to appreciate the world to the same extent as I am and have.

I believe it is my role to teach others not to fear dying alone, not to fear dying without procreating, and not to fear a meaningless death, as what is it that makes humans so persistent to make meaning out of meaningless. Life is just a short period that prepares us for death, when it's time to go and venture into death, our consciousness will be taken from us. At least I am able to share the light I enjoy with others, while I’m still here. While understanding that not all light is positive and some light is actually disguised darkness, and also some things that appear positive are not so, once they turn into habituation.

So I philosophised about how much of my life was vanity and arrogance and how much modesty I truly deserve to hold as a person, I feel my friends talk me up too much as a person, and I can’t help but feel a little arrogant at times. I'm worried that even if I know I'm arrogant it may hold me back from truly appreciating the company of others. If I'm arrogant and think my knowledge is better then someone else, I'm restricting myself from reaching my full capacity through understanding others no matter how insignificant their addition may be, even superficial communication about so called meaningless objects is still meaningful in itself, as the fact it is there, makes it an important concern. It's just that some people aren't as happy as other people and that's the only difference between peoples existence, some people feel happy with what they've got, and some people want more. Compassion is a whole lot more enjoyable then pity, just like attachments hold people back from experiencing true beauty, pity holds us back from truly appreciating the power of concern. There was a period where it felt like I was sitting on the edge of the universe, with all of it’s beautiful colours and it's complete darkness of infinity and solitude, and I chose to stay on this side for a purpose. The purpose of appreciating my existence and sharing my appreciation with others, and hunting down enlightenment in the future in a sober meditative state, as I felt I didn't deserve enlightenment at this time.

So once I’d decided to stay I decided to get up walk off and these intensely profound feelings almost left me as abruptly as the second I stood up. I got up and decided to enjoy some superficial indulgence and appreciate the rest of the night through music and dance. It felt as though it was about 2am (4 or 5 hours after taking the tab) and I was still a little jittery but suprisingly everything seemed pretty much back to normal, the mindfuck never reached an intense state it was always quite simple yet profound, and as soon as I was walking around again, I felt virtually sober. The visuals weren’t jumping out at me like they were before, everything looked and felt pretty normal and everything made the same sense as it normally does rather then melting off, fading, glowing and bending into different colours or fractal patterns. Everything was simple I was just loaded with energy and my heart was beating very fast, so I went for a run and still had heaps of energy.

About an hour later I got a bit worried because my heart was hurting for some strange reason, so decided to take a valium to ease the muscles and hopefully slow my heartbeat, but also to ease the paranoia I held about it. It slowed the beat just enough to stop hurting but still leave me with plenty of energy. So I went wondering around the doof enjoying the company of others, meeting lots of interesting people and contemplating my future, understanding the world from abstract mathematical perspectives and reflections on previous trips where I once saw the universe in pure mathematical equations and numbers based around fractal patterns. Where every single living thing had its mathematical position and that was all that defined it from anything else, it was all just a slightly different mathematical universe, and the one we live in matched the fibonacci numbers. Eventually the integration died down and I began joking with my friends about trashy events we could put on for a disturbing psychedelic party. With seedy noisecore/speedcore and screw with peoples heads having films of scat porn and other similar disturbing music, film and objects so people walk away all jittery jittery and confused. As you may understand, in our altered mindstates, this ideation was hilarious.  Lots of acid humor ensued for the next several hours. Settling down enjoying an awesome live PA by hallucinogen and the rest of the music the doof had to offer, with it’s awesome psy trance.

All in all was a pretty awesome trip, wasn’t as intense as I expected from my first high dose (as microdots in the past have blown my mind too, but only with the combination of cannabis). I definitely believe I could have gone deeper had I removed my grounding by smoking some cannabis, however had I taken more, I don’t think I would have seen a deeper side of myself, it felt as though I had reached LSD land, and any further would just make me feel more inebriated and not so much, more philosophical. I believe that a deeper trip might be more euphoric, but because of it's lack of association with my everyday life, would be quite difficult to intergrate. The trip was quite interesting because it felt like I got to see the edge of the universe. I got to appreciate such intense bliss and apathy towards death and then before I knew it, I was back normal.. quite funny. I did notice I was still hallucinating up to about 12 hours later but it just wasn’t anywhere near as intense so I hadn’t noticed it really at all after the peak had passed.

OPEN DOOR TO EDGE OF UNIVERSE, PEAK OVER THE EDGE, LAUGH, CLOSE THE DOOR! HELLO BACK TO REALITY...

Exp Year: 2006	ExpID: 59273

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 25, 2007	Views: 27,138

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LSD (2) : Music Discussion (22), Sex Discussion (14), Relationships (44), Glowing Experiences (4), Festival / Lg. Crowd (24)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 2 tablets
		 oral
		 MDMA
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 2:00
		 2 tablets
		 oral
		 MDMA
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 5:00
		 3 drops
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (liquid)

		   T+ 0:00
		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   87 kg

During the Summer of 2004 I experienced what I can only describe as my cleanest and most wholesome drug experience. In a large public park 5-10 miles from my home there is an illegal rave held in the woods twice yearly. Usually the first coincides with the Summer Solstice with a follow up 2-4 weeks later depending on the success of the previous party. My friends and I always ensure that we are around at this time of year as the rave is not to be missed!!! This particular experience is from the 2nd or 3rd year I attended.

SCENE AND SETTING:

The thought of doing acid hadn't even entered my mind as we were picking our way through the trees towards the faint beat of the music. In fact I had never tried LSD before. I had done Ketamine on 2 or 3 occasions but had not enjoyed the experience at all. We had some good quality E with us and had all taken E many times in the preceeding 3/4 years. I only had 2 pills with me that night and knew that I would have to get more as it was just after 11 pm and the party would go on all night and most of the following day.

As we finally burst through what seemed like and impenetrable wall of trees, into the large clearing, our faces lit up. Hundreds of people were already there dancing in the dark to the sound of some quality drum n bass. As we aproached the main throng I double dropped my 2 pills. My tolerance was quite high by this time and I wanted to get the full effects of the E buzz. We made our way toward the back of the rave where there was more space to sit down and watch all that was going on - living in a built up area and restrictions imposed by the government regarding large gatherings outside meant this situation was normally only available in night clubs.

Rolling a joint and looking up at the trees and stars I waited for the E to kick in. As usual at this point in the rave I was in a contemplative mood, thinking about what I had done at work that week and what all the people I was seeing had done or were going to do. As usual there was a wide variety of people in the woods meaning that some types of drugs that were normally difficult to get hold of were available, also obscure things that I'd never heard of. And as usual some of my friends were extremely keen to try anything that they could get their hands on. They were like kids in a sweet shop, 20 year old kids!!!

Anyway the E began to kick in and felt that warmth in my stomach so I got up to start dancing, as soon as I had stood up bam! The E hit me big time, for me thats the best part, coming up on a pill. So in my euphoric state I began to wander round the woods talking to people while unconciously bopping away to the tunes.

This is what I love about large groups of people drug taking, walking around talking to strangers who are on or near the same hightened level that you are. It increases the buzz for me and fills me with empathy toward these people as I'm sure it does to them. Tonight however looking up at the stars through the tops of the trees I thought I was going to explode with joy. Sounds a bit fluffy for a grown man but thats how it was.

About 2 hours after dropping the E the intial buzz started to wear off slightly so I scouted around for another pick me up. I bumped into this guy and asked if he had any pills. He said he could sell me 1 but did I want any acid? As I've said before I'd never tried it and to be honest it had always stayed away from it as I wasn't sure whether I'd like it or not. So I told this guy that I'd just take the pill and maybe come back later for the acid.

I found my friends again, who by this time were all deep in one sort of buzz or another and asked if anyone knew who had pills for sale as the 1 I'd bought wouldn't see me through until morning. A friend said he'd someone with a bag full near the DJ tent so off I went again, dropping my 3rd tablet. I found this chap surrounded by 10-15 younger people, I'd say about 16/17 yr olds. He looked quite harrassed as they were all shouting at him looking for the same thing I was. I took him aside and asked what he had and he told me he only had 4 pills left for sale. I said I'd take them and the fact I was slightly older and not being hysterical about it meant he sold them to me.

One of the younger blokes in the crowd asked me if I had anything and I said no, I'd just bought personal and it was the dealer's last ones. This boy asked to have a look at them and foolishly I showed him one, he took it and told his mate he had a pill. I spun him round and asked as nicely as possible for it back, he held out his hand and showed me the pill plus a swiss army knife that I assumed he was using to intimedate me with. This annoyed me and I took the pill back and turned around to find my mates. This boy had really taken my buzz down a bit which was annoying and even after double dropping again I couldn't retrieve the intense euphoria I was previously experiencing. I gave the other 2 pills to my friend who had pointed out the dealer to me coz I wanted him to double drop at the same time as me.

So as the the night went on the music switched to hard house and techno which I really like and we danced until the sun came up, again marveling at the fact that we were outside, buzzing and dancing.

OUTSIDE:

At about 4a.m, 5 hours after first dropping, there were only 3 of my friends left, most having gone home to take more Ketamine. It was then that I bumped into the chap who had offered me acid previously in the night. He asked me if I had any pills for sale and was obviously too mashed to remember who I was. I replied no and asked him if he had any acid left. I don't know why I asked him this coz the thought never crossed my mind until the words came out of my mouth. He said he wasn't sure as he'd sold most of the bottle but would check. He clumsily looked at the bottle and said he thought he had 2 hits left. I told him to hold them and fetched my friend who I shared my pills with and told him that there was acid available. He jumped at the chance especially when he realised it was liquid. As it turned out the chap had more left than he thought and ended u giving us 3 large drops each on back of our hands. I didn't know what to do with it and was gonna snort it for some strange reason when he said just lick it.

Whether it was the E or the acid, I don't know but I could almost visualise the acid as it made it's way through the creases of my tongue into my blood stream, this was about 4.30 a.m on a sunday morning when I was already pretty well mashed, had been awake for at least 20 hours and had work the next morning.

But as we were in a wood with amazing tunes and the sun just risen, it seemed perfect and all sense went out the window. It was about 45 mins to an hour before I felt any real effect. The problem was that just as it I was beginning to get some mad body sensations, a group of guys surrounded me. I recognised the guy who had shown me the knife earlier, he and some of his mates were slowly moving toward me, blocking me off from my friends. I shouted to my friends but due to the volume of the music and their proximity to the speaker, they didn't hear me. I started to panic and spun round, to my surprise one of these guys was stading right behind me, fortuntely he looked as if he'd taken something also and sort of swooned when I faced him. I pushed past him and hurried to my friends.

The experience seemed to be intensified by the acid so that as I broke through the ring of wrong'uns I felt a release wihtin me and my body became as light as a feather, weightless almost. At the same time I started to expreience OEVs, the ground began to undulate and when I looked up to the leaves on the trees, they began to shimmer and move as if they were in a kalideascope. I was still conscious of the fact that I'd just had a narrow escape from a possible beating and I think as a result this shaped the way my visuals and perception reacted to the acid: a lot of people at the rave were wearing hooded tops and jackets and these people I percieved as being almost Dementor like, with crooked noses and empty eyes. I began to get more panicky and restless and asked my friend who was also beginning to trip if he wanted to move somewhere else and sit down. He agreed after turning off the imaginery tap that he told me had appeared above his shoulder and was making him 'very wet'.

As we made our way to a log to sit on, the ground was moving more intensely. It was covered in leaves and twigs but I believed there to be strange creatures wandering underfoot. We sat next to a chap that my friend knew and I told him that I had done acid and that it was my first time, he told me to enjoy it but I said that feeling a bit panicky and wasn't sure if I liked it.

He took my hand and told me to relax and just go with it, not to fight it. Almost before he had finished speaking I felt better, 100 million times better. He gave me an arm and hand massage that was one of the most amazing experiences. He told me to keep my eyes closed and it felt like he was moving all my energy up through my arm toward the tips of my fingers. Finally he wrapped his hand around each of my fingers in turn and pulled away sharply letting go of each finger as he did so. The effect was amazing. I saw sparks and fireworks going off on the inside of my eyelids, intensifying in colour and activity with each finger he pulled.

Eventually he said open your eyes and my god were they open!!! Everything was bathed in a golden sunlight, I could see the sunlight literally dripping off branches on to people's heads. I also felt a light inside me eminating outward. All my previous anxiety and foreboding had disappeared, as had any negative thoughts that had been buried in my head. I could feel them being pushed out with this new light from within me. I felt euphoria on a scale I never thought possible but I also felt liberated like never before.

Whilst my friend, L, was getting his massage I again watched all the revellers dancing to the music and felt a profound connection to everyone of them, even the group that tried to intimidate me previously. The massage had the same effect on my friend and as we were beginning to peak simultaneously we decided to move out of the woods as it was starting to become quite claustrophobic. We found our 2 other mates and said that we wanted to go back to my place to chill and smoke.

As we exited the woods into the most glorious sunshine we found a bench that overlooked the park. We were on a hill with the wood directly at our backs so L and myself lay down on the grass looked out at the incredible vista in front of us. the wood sloped down to our left and in front of us were large fields of the greenest grass sloping and in the distance rising again to more woods. I could see people walking their dogs and actually had the feeling that I could telepathically communicate with the dogs. I didn't want to come into contact with the other humans around as I believed that I was not human at all but part of the earth and the air around me, not human in any way.

The longer I looked at the sky, the more the visuals intensified, turning it first brilliant blue then slowly morphing into purple and finally pink with all the shades in between. The clouds were becoming kaleidascopic patterns moving and changing but staying within the shapes the clouds were naturally in. I felt like my back was growing into the trees behind me, that my back was becoming strong and trunk like. I felt like my head was a two way gate, with me flowing out into the atmosphere as rays of energy and the atmosphere was engorging me with it's power and natural beauty.

This point was about 6:30am, 2 hours after I had dropped the acid. It is really hard to express just how at one with the world and nature I felt. It was almost as if I didn't want to be human or at least trapped in a body. I wanted to be energy and I felt that I was actually becoming my soul or sub-concious. I stopped being my being and became my aura. When I see a mad trippy picture with all the psychedelic colours and patterns, that is what I was that morning, but a 3-d living version of it.

I totally forgot that me and L were with my other 2 friends, they hadn't done acid only E and so were coming down quite severely. They said that they wanted to go but I really wanted to stay and see just how far I could become energy, but also I was aware of the fact that I didn't want to cause any bad feeling to anything in the world and so agreed to go.

Luckily it was a very long walk to anywhere resembling urbanisation and myself and L were constantly entertained en route with intense visuals. Mine predomantly being sunlight dripping off everything and giving it a golden hue.

After about and hour and a half walking we reached the nearest tube station at about 8 a.m, 3.5 hrs after dropping the acid. As soon as I saw buildings and a road I became slightly anxious again and the sky seemed to darken somewhat. There was no way I was getting on the tube in my state, even at that time on a sunday morning. Although my initial feeling upon reaching urbanisation was anxiety this soon passed to euphoria, my mood seemed to switch between these 2 extremes for a while.

Someone called a cab for us all and we waited about 30mins. Things were really quite strange at this point, I think maybe the change in environment was having some affect as I still felt part of the energy I had been when on the hill but I was no longer there and I felt that I was transporting myself back to that point via the energy waves that were still coming out of my head.

INSIDE:

Once inside the cab my trip became completely introspective where as outside I was part of the world, now I was inside my head. I was still peaking and looking out of the window in the cab sky was still changing colour but darker shades this time and quite menacing. I felt like the roof of the cab had cut off my link to the world of beauty and aura and that the sky was punishing me for breaking the bond to early.

Eventually we got back to my place down and began to smoke and lot of skunk which increased the introspectiveness but also relaxed me whilst prolonging the visuals I was experiencing. I cannot even begin to tell the thoughts that went through my mind as they were not coherent at all.

This state gradually lessened from about 4pm until I was at a point where I felt completely contented with some minor peripharal OEVs. As it was my first wonderful experience with LSD I wanted to prolong it for as long as possible and didn't go to bed until about 2am when the skunk was making me fall asleep.

I woke later that morning for work at 7am in a total state of contentment. I noticed minor OEVs on the tube and on my PC at work. My thoughts turned to what I had done and experienced and it seemed almost like a fairytale for want of a better phrase. My whole mind set has changed since and I am now more accepting of people's attitudes and ideas. After what I have seen, anything is possible. It proved to be catalyst for me and from being stuck in a rut that I was, I moved onward and upward getting a new job and taking care of my life and the world around me more conscienciously.

I have now decided to go back to study and futher my knowledge. The origins of this decision I know are from what I experienced that morning on that hill.

I would definately do it again however this time I would plan it better. Give myself 2 days in which to take the acid and another 2 to recover. I would only do liquid as I have heard that clarity and cleanness of botters/tabs can be affected simply by the fact they are not in liquid form. I would try and take notes during the trip and would only take it outside in an open space with a few people I trust. I would also close my eyes more and see if that changed the trip at all.

This is just my opinion, others may prefer and different course of action.

Mooge

Exp Year: 2004	ExpID: 55101

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Feb 5, 2007	Views: 49,251

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LSD (2), MDMA (3) : Rave / Dance Event (18), First Times (2), General (1)


		 DOSE:

		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 oral
		 Alcohol - Beer/Wine
		 (liquid)

		 smoked
		 Cannabis

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

I had done speed and smoked a lot of weed before trying LSD; in fact I'd always been scared to try LSD although I didn't understand anything about it. All the stories I had heard where about great experiences. Unfortunately for me, my first and only trip turned out to be the worst experience of my life.

It all started at my friends house, there was about 4 or 5 of us and I thought we was originally going to smoke some weed and just have a few beers but some guy my friend knew from the army pulled out some LSD. I can't remember what they where other than he said they where purple homs - double dipped, whatever that meant. I guess they dip the tab wait for it to dry then its dipped again.

I didn't want to take it, but I thought I'd look like a whimp if I didn't, I guess today I'd rather of dealt with being called a whimp than have to deal with what I went through.

I dropped it; about 30 minutes later I felt the initial sensation that I was reserved inside myself. I guess you could call it a feeling of defensiveness. My sensory perception was the first to go, along with feelings of paranoia. I was sitting in a chair facing all my other friends and I remember thinking the music was too loud, so I got up to turn the music down. My friends where looking at me a little weird. After I sat back down, I remember thinking, the music is too quiet, so I got back up and turned the music back up. Then again I thought now its too loud and got back up and turned it back down. This went on for quite a while, then I realized, oh no, is this was the trip has done to me?

I was kind of stuck in a loop repeating my actions of getting up and down. Something was in my mind telling me stuff, I thought I have to ignore whatever my mind is telling me to beat this thing, whatever it was. I thought to myself, this trip is going to be some kind of test and I have to beat it.

Of course after realizing that this was not going to be fun, I started to panic. But inwardly I thought, oh well I better try and handle it. I remember the feelings of paranoia, I could hear every little sensational noise, I noticed my friend had a copy of murder casebook on the floor, and I started to think about maybe they where after me or where conspiring against me. I could hear the neighbors kids screaming which all added to the paranoia of seeing a book on serial killers on my friends floor.

I thought I have to get this out my system so I went to the bathroom and put my fingers down my throat all to none affect. I remember my friend coming up to me and asking me if the trip had kicked in yet and I said, “yes”. I didn’t really care at the time only that I had made a big mistake and there was nothing I could do about it. The sensations started to come and go about once every 10 minutes, I knew when it was going to happen and I tried to fight it. But eventually I couldn’t control it.

I thought my only chance is to go to sleep and sleep it off, I walked down my friends hallway into the bedroom at the end and I climbed into bed. I remember lying down and thinking I have to fall asleep. Of course I couldn’t. So I got back up and started to walk back down the hallway towards the living room. When I got closer to the hallway, I kind of blinked and I ended up back outside the bedroom door. I thought what the heck, I just walked down there and how did I end up back here. I walked down the hallway again and I got to the living room and same thing, I blinked my eyes and I was back outside the bedroom door. I tried it again and again, and same thing every time I got closer to the living room I would blink and be back by the bedroom door.

I remember a very distinct thought saying to me, “This is hell, your are stuck in this hallway now for eternity”. The thought was the devil, I said to myself. I got very scared within myself. After a while this wore off, I got into the living room. I think I tried to tell my friend what just happened but they where all busy boasting about their little trips and their last thing that just happened to them. I sat down in the living room in the same chair and my friend said he was going out to take the dog for a walk. 2 other of my friends said they was going to go with him. So I said to them, “Oh I’ll go with you guys”. They responded very abruptly, “No you won’t you have to stay here”. I guess I must have been tripping more than them and they knew it. Of course within my own little trip world I started to get paranoid, why didn’t they want me to go, they are conspiring to do something, maybe even kill me. So I thought to myself I have to get out of here quick and get home.

Of course this was going to be a difficult task as I lived about 6 miles from my home. I ran down the hallway into my friend’s bedroom and ran to the window. I opened the window as wide as it would go and jumped out the window. Luckily for me my friend lived on the ground floor of a bungalow style house. I remember just thinking to myself I have to get the heck out of here. I ran across this wooded area up towards a bridge where the main bus route went down. I climbed up the small embankment to the side of the bridge and onto the main road. I started to run up the road wanting to get home to my family and away from these people.

I could feel my heart starting to beat faster and faster (I assume because I was running so fast). I started to hear voices telling me I was going to die and that this was my end. I started to hear an ambulance siren coming towards me. I remember stopping running and thinking, “Oh know I’m going to have a heart attack and die”. I remember the fear very distinctly and the fear of death and not wanting to die like this. But then the ambulance went past where I was, it was a mere coincidence that at the time I was tripping and was running that an ambulance happened to race by, or was it even there at all I wondered. I realized it was a part of the trip after all. I continued to run up the road, I must have run a good mile to the next crossroads. For some reason I stopped heading for the direction of home and I crossed the street and stood behind this barred fence with railings. As I was standing there, I remember this semi-truck coming towards me, I thought oh God he’s coming right for me, so I ran the opposite direction.

I reached a work development where there were a lot of factories and I turned down into their development, I remember walking and seeing soccer ground with floodlights on the ground, so I climbed over the fence onto the grounds. I remember walking across the field looking up into the lights, thinking it was some spectacular mystery. I put my hands in my pocket and pulled out my money and threw it all in the air, then I took my watch of and threw it also, then my house keys. I then took my sweatshirt off and threw it in the air. I was now walking round with no money, no keys to get in my house and no top on.

I remember falling into the grass. The grass was about 6 feet tall and that I was getting smaller and smaller. I could hear a stream of water starting to run around me and I then appeared to be in the water looking from a different perspective. I remember distinct thoughts saying to me that I was a molecule or some kind of cellular structure just floating around in a stream; I was some kind of stream creature.

I don’t remember much after this other than I must have blacked out. I came to about 3 to 4 hours later and thought where the heck am I. I started to have memories of seeing some old man with white hair at this mansion and I was talking to him. I wasn’t tripping no more but I was having these memories of what had happened, I thought I was either dreaming or was having flashbacks. I remember a voice telling me I was the luckiest, greediest man in the world, I have no idea who was telling me this and why. I thought to myself at first that I must of died and that maybe this man had sent me back to earth because my time was not yet, and that this memory was from the place I had just came back from. My head was so messed up, I couldn’t think right.

I started to think how the heck am I going to get back to my friends house. I started to walk back out of the development and I saw 2 security guards driving past. They drove up to me; of course I was walking with no shirt on so they knew something was wrong. Right away they asked me if I was ok and had I been taking drugs. I told them I was ok and I knew where I was. They told me that they had seen me wondering around the development a few hours ago.

They drove me to their security hut and called the police. I remember hearing the police on the speakerphone. The security guy told the police that I had been taking drugs and was wondering around the development. The police asked the security guy if I was ok now and did I know where was, I told them yes, as I didn’t want the police to come out, because if they took me home my mom would know I had taken drugs. So I told them, yes I knew where I was. The police said they wouldn’t bother coming out then. After that I told the security guy that I lost my shirt and keys etc.

I told him I threw it on the field, he just looked at me like I was crazy. I guess I was. Anyway he went and found my sweatshirt but couldn’t find my money or keys. They let me go then. So I walked up the road thinking where the heck am I. I saw a taxi cab and flagged him down. I asked him did he know the name of my friend’s road and he said yes, it was about a mile away. So I got in and he took me to my friends. By this time it was 6am in the morning. I had taken the LSD around 12 midnight. I think I actually blacked out for at least 4 hours. My friends afterwards told me they had been searching for me for about 4 hours around the streets.

I tried to tell them what had happened but I couldn’t remember much. My friend gave me a change of clothes and I went home like nothing had happened. To this day my family doesn’t know what I did that night. I never took LSD ever again in fact any other drug or weed again.

I few weeks later, I went to the same friends house and he was smoking weed, I went in and sat down. My friend asked me if I wanted a cup of tea. So I said yes. I started drinking the tea and all of a sudden I looked at the tea and a voice said to me, they have dropped LSD in your tea. I started to freak out and cuss at my friend saying, “You have spiked my tea, what the heck”. He just looked at me like I was crazy. I said to my other  friend, “Lets get out of here”, and I left. I never went back to his house again after that. This was my first inclination that I had some permanent damage due to the LSD a few weeks before.

This whole account of what happened that night could not compare to what really happened. The fear, the paranoia and the schizophrenic thoughts constantly bombarding my mind with harassment and propaganda. I would tell anyone even thinking of taking LSD to reconsider. I never thought this would affect me the way it has. I was no different to my friends in personality, but why it affected me different I don’t know. My friends never did explain to me after what they experienced even to this day. All of us kind of drifted apart over the years.

This was not the end by no means. About 7 years ago, this was years after I had given up drinking and smoking weed etc. I was working out regular and was running a few times a week. I was running my daily routine of about a mile and a half of a fast run and I got to the end of my run and was approaching a hill, I remember feeling my heart beat real fast. All of a sudden, bam, I was having flashbacks of the time I was running in my trip and heard the ambulance. I was getting thoughts of I was going to die and have a heart attack.

I stopped running and walked home the rest of the way. I went home and went upstairs and cried bitterly. I thought to myself this stuff has destroyed my mind. I started to panic and started to have a bad panic attack. I could hear thoughts of what I thought was the devil telling me I was going die and that he was going to get me and that I was going to hell. I was crying and didn’t know what to do. I could feel this heaviness on my back like something was on me, a force, a bad spirit whatever you want to call it. After this I kneeled down by my bed and prayed to God to take it away.

Eventually after that experience I became a Christian and gave my life to God. I have suffered panic attacks since but on a milder scale also the thoughts constantly bombarding me sometimes don’t stop, my mind is constantly racing around, I’m constantly thinking non stop about everything. I question everything and find it hard to trust people. I still get fear and dread sometimes out of nowhere. Also not long after this I was at college and went through a bad panic attack while walking through the college hallway. I started to think I was in some kind of hell corridor and that I was trapped in this corridor amongst all this evil. I walked out really quick. Also another time when I got on a bus I was walking down the bus to go sit on the back seat and all the faces on the bus where looking at me, I started going real paranoid and started to have flash backs. I thought the bus was in hell and all the people where demons and they where at any second going to jump up and grab me like a crazy zombie movie. I freaked out and got off the bus. I walked 2 ½ miles to my friends because I couldn’t get back on the bus.

I have learnt to live with it over the years but in effect it died down a lot, I try and keep myself stress free as to not bring on any kind of flash back. LSD has affected me on a permanent level. I hope this convinces at least one person to not take LSD.

God Bless.

Unknown

Exp Year: 1990	ExpID: 37641

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Feb 9, 2007	Views: 54,183

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LSD (2), Police / Customs (60) : General (1), First Times (2), Health Problems (27), Post Trip Problems (8), HPPD / Lasting Visuals (40), Bad Trips (6), Small Group (2-9) (17)