		 DOSE:

		 3 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (liquid)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   165 lb

LSD Trip Journal begins: I need to try to straighten out what happened so I can read about it later, or at least just see it written down so it can’t keep escaping me.

Let me note that when I first consumed this Happy Fungus Juice, as Austin has named it, I had no idea any of this mind bending bat-shit insane stuff was lurking just around the bend. I was under the impression that my mind would remain relatively sober while enjoying some crazy hallucinations. This was not at all the case in the very least whatsoever. I was so lost. I was lost in my own mind. After getting off work at five, on a Friday, I walked over to a house my friend was taking care of for somebody, met up with my two friends, and dropped three hits of acid in the form of liquid dropped onto candy. It was about five thirty.

After waiting around for about an hour and a half I began to feel very altered, along with my friends who we’ll call Austin and Ryan. I, however, was feeling much farther off base than they were: a fact I almost doubted in the beginning, but it became more and more apparent as time wore on, because phenomena which I felt acutely in the early hours were later reported by at least Ryan as well. When I come to think of it, I did have 50% more acid. Upon investigation online, the three hits I consumed is larger than an average dose, especially for a first try. As we started to come up we decided it would be good to be outdoors and exited the house on foot, bound uphill to a forested river area.

Out in the forest on the trail everything I heard seemed to be echoing to me from a tremendous, tremendous distance. I had no idea where I was, and totally forgot my location despite the fact that I was right next to a well-traveled road that I have known for nearly 15 years. This sensation of being lost was so strong that I repeatedly tried to explain it to my friends. Despite that, I was not frightened. I was simply overcome with wonderment.

What began inside myself as a sort of insistent vibration, or rapid pulse, managed to travel outward into the entire world. Everything was pulsing at me so quickly that it appeared to shine and jump out at me, much in the way images are displayed on an electronic screen, I could not differentiate between the different pulses creating the image, but I knew (or “felt” in this trippy case) that they were in fact separate. They were only streaming together to create what appeared to be a seamless shine or sparkle. They were separate and continuous at the same time.

Depth and size, my very sense of distance was awry in a way I have never before felt or imagined. For example, while on a walkway (perhaps two or three feet tall) I felt as though I were on a very, very tall bridge. And, merely because I could hear a river, I assumed that there was a river underneath this bridge. In reality there was only the ground.  Things continued to seem incredibly far away from me, both in that the space between me and a particular rock, perhaps 15 feet, felt exceptionally far, but also in that things that were far away, say half a mile, appeared to be right next to me. It’s as if my normal continuous concept of how deep things are has been sliced into two or three parts (in categories of right there with me, and really really, really far away) there is no in between at all. This was creating some very interesting scenes in my vision, especially since I was in the middle of a muggy, vibrant, rainforest. I continue to forget where I am and feel as if I am on another continent or planet, if not for the fact that my two friends are literally right next to me I would probably have forgotten altogether anything that I knew at all, which is pretty much what happened anyway.

To put it shortly, I was so astounded by everything, by my wheeling and spiraling thoughts, that I had no mental time space to think about anything else: I could only perceive and wonder. My sense of time vanished so that I was existing only in the present (which is the only way that it’s possible to exist anyways) I had no concept of the past, or being there, and little concept of the future, and what it would be like when it arrived. My varied attempts to explain the situation to Ryan were incredibly futile.

My thoughts adopted a quick and strange tempo, which was the only thing by which I could pretend to measure time at all but that measure was completely unreliable for my thoughts were spinning as fast, or faster, than they ever have in my life.

Still out in the rainforest, at my friend Austin’s behest, we began to wander off into unexplored territory which felt more unexplored by several orders of magnitude than I have ever felt about a place before. There was a sort of stream which had confounded us during the entire night up until this time, which Austin had been attempting to make us cross, but which Ryan I were not all that keen to. Looking into the stream was amazing: it was a marvelous cyan, azure rush, brimming with silvery little bubbles flowing over a bed of muted blue, red, and dark grey stones. No less amazing were the trees on which we stood, which seemed to me magnified as though under a microscope even though I was observing them with my own two eyes. They were almost a fluorescent green and orange, or at least the moss, was.

Austin had been trying to get us to cross it (the water) and I, realizing somehow that I had no way of knowing where I was going, but that if I didn’t go somewhere I would be out in the forest all night, just jumped off the shore into the river and waded to the other side.

Being in the river felt amazing beyond comprehension and Ryan and I, not so much Austin, felt strongly that we were in some sort of primal folk tale involving the water and trickster spirits. Austin was the trickster spirit, trying to beckon me into the water, and I was attempting to resist going into the water while at the same time neither of us knew that, or how, we were doing it. The whole incident was particularly surreal to myself, since I had begun to think of the water as a representation for existence itself, and a thing that I must dive into and take part of before I am allowed to leave.

Not for the first time that night, Ryan and I, myself having seconds earlier arrived from underneath the water, were greeting by the sight of Austin running off into the distance and disappearing. This caused me no small amount of consternation, since I was vaguely aware that should I try something similar I would be instantly lost. Ryan and I thus set out to apprehend Austin, and did find him.

He had done a similar thing two or three times earlier and chose at those times to hide in the woods and surprise us as we came along. We all three found ourselves imagining strongly that we were some sort of forest creatures and ran through the woods for the sheer joy of it. These first hours were euphoric, and yet unsettling.

When we managed to arrive back at the house, which Austin was taking care of for a friend of his cousins, it was about 8:30 – 8:50 in the nighttime. Upon or arrival I ended up standing in the entryway, soaking wet yet not displeased with the situation, for about 20 minutes. The reason I could not remove myself from the doorway was because I literally could not think of the first step necessary to get out.

I had not eaten since about nine hours previous to this time (I have now learned that this probably contributed to my exceptionally strong trip), so we decided to order some food. Thank God, my brother came over to visit, or else we would never have managed to obtain the pizza that we eventually ate. Even with my relatively sober brother in attendance it took a remarkably long, long, long time.

Simultaneously, my brother kept repeatedly trying to raise a topic to discuss with me, but for the life of me I had no idea what it was. He explained it several times to my face, yet I still had no idea what he was talking about, because I kept forgetting it the second that it was over. I ultimately just pretended that I knew what was going on so he would stop trying to explain the situation to me. I’m now informed that he was telling me to come visit him at school as a side trip to my other travel plans.

After finally contriving a way to escape from the doorway, a process which was hindered by the physical lack of towels to dry off with, I entered a very solemn couple of hours wherein I meditated on the very concept of possessing. What it means to me . . . to have stuff. What it's like when you don’t, what people need to do to get it, and the way those desires shape this entire planet that we inhabit.

I found myself incredibly grateful for the many luxurious accommodations I’m afforded in my life here with my Mom and Dad. My every need is provided for, and I have done relatively nothing to provide for it. I felt simultaneously very grateful about this, that things were the way they are, but also I felt like it really shouldn't be any other way. On the one hand, it doesn't feel right to say that my Mom and Dad should do everything for me, but on the other hand they’re the ones that called me into this inexplicable and maddening existence, and if they hadn't then I wouldn’t be obligated to provide for myself at all. I felt supremely strange and a little unsettled by these thoughts, since I wasn’t sure what I was going to do about them now that I had them.

Somehow I came away from the meditative state with a feeling, which I am presently managing to retain, of new decisiveness. I feel as if I can, if I so choose, send my life in whatever direction I want. I am not yet happily reconciled to the responsibility of doing so, but nonetheless I feel that is a valuable thing to have attained.

Again and again throughout the night I felt myself thinking, “well that is an amazing thought, but there’s absolutely no way I am ever going to remember it. I better just enjoy it while it lasts at let it go.” This seemed to me the attitude that I should be taking toward every moment in life, and maybe it actually is. I have thought this many times before, on many different levels, but I have never actually done it so intensely.

My thought-scape was continually spiraling into itself, much like the tectonic plates that form the Earth's crust. I felt as though they were all the same basic material, the thoughts I was having, like the rocks on the surface of the earth are all finite but that they were being continually kneaded, milled, or perhaps inexplicably conjoined (although I do not mean to imply the “bad” connotations that these adjectives typically carry) that when the old rocks finally appeared once more, I could no longer recognize them. I must emphasis that this turmoil was swift beyond measure, and not at all like tectonic plates (not as we imagine them anyway) in relation to speed.

Once I realized this was happening, I also realized that I should just stop trying to explain what was going on to Ryan and Austin, since it was clearly not going to work. At the same time I acutely felt an urge to explain my sensations an urge: which persists so strongly, even now, that I have been typing for hours. I also frequently forgot that they had had the same drugs that I had had. Even now I feel that I was far, far, farther gone than they were, but I have no way of knowing if that is true or not. Either way, it doesn't really matter.

After my thoughts about possession ended for the time I moved on dwell on the feeling that I did not want any more drugs of any kind for awhile. I wanted to just relax, safe and sound, at home for a time in my own normal mind. I did not know what I was getting myself into when I dropped all that acid, and it honestly feels like a bit of a slap in the face reminding me like, “yeah, no kidding, stop taking drugs, when did you decide it was okay.” Of course, morally it is perfectly fine, but upon second glance my actions have been in total defiance of the culture I was raised in. Safe to say, I am in no danger from drugs any longer, because I have been shaken by how powerful they actually are. It’s like living with a goddamn Bengal tiger in your house.

Oh, yes, let me not forget, there was also a ridiculously large cat in the small house with us. This was odd, because although Austin stated clearly that it was in the house with us, we could not see it in the least, and it was a very small space. Nonetheless, the cat eventually appeared and was unduly astonishing.

After all this, and no doubt I am still forgetting much of it (although I am impressed with the amount that I have managed to sort out just now), we three travelers journeyed over to the couch and put on “Fearless” with Jet Li. I was very happy to be under covers (there was a nice blanket on the bed) because, what with feeling for what felt like a literal eternity that I was lost in another world, I was a bit shaken and felt subliminally reassured to be in a warmer place rather than a colder one.

Early on in the movie Austin left, and we saw no more of him that night, although we all remained awake for untold hours after that point.

“Fearless,” contains some deep and significant themes concerning violence, strife, and making your way forward in life. As I watched I discovered myself pondering the “essence” if you have any idea what I mean, of those concepts. I was aghast at the way violence finds its way into this world, and felt as though its very existence must just be a big misunderstanding by someone. I was then deeply sorry and unhappy for hours about violence: the fact that it existed.

At this point I felt as if I had been tossed in a roiling hurricane or river of emotion and thought, for eternity, and reconciled myself to dying in accordance with Jet Li’s character as he died upon the screen. I was trying as hard as possible to follow Lao Tzu’s advice (basically go with the flow), so that I would remain unharmed from the water, and I think that helped a bit.

It was time to sleep then, or so I thought, little did I know it was not going to work, for the insistent pulsing was ever-present, so Ryan and I made about transforming the couch into a bed to sleep upon. Earlier we’d failed at this task after being confounded by the simple mechanism of the bed. I was very slightly beginning to return to normal though, and to my satisfaction was able to conjure up the bed, as it seemed, merely by pushing on it harder in the way I saw fit. I said something to Ryan like, “What?! It’s not the way we want it!? Well we’ll just push on it till it is!” and as I said these words I felt that I was talking about existence itself, and that the “pushing” was the exertion of our wills upon the world around us. I was unsettled by this thought, because it was quickly accompanied by a yang to its yin, which was a thought that said, “but what if you can’t push hard enough?”

Thereafter, I lay down on the bed with Ryan. It was rather small and we had to share it. Rather than being unhappy with this I was exceptionally pleased that I wasn’t just lying in a ditch somewhere. I felt like my comfortable existence was in jeopardy, and that I had better just fucking enjoy it before all creature comforts up and vanished. Somehow, sometime, I fell asleep at what I estimate to have been about 3:00 in the morning. I felt like I had been tripping for days. The fact that Ryan was still near me made this thought difficult to believe, and yet I could not comprehend that it was otherwise.

In the morning we awoke at about 7:00, still with slightly bent minds (I am still out of it to a fairly high degree even now, which is 2:00 P.M. later, the same day). We found ourselves shuffling back and forth in the living room / kitchen area, which was emanating strong vibes of Asia and the sea, mindlessly trying to explain to each other how completely boggling and befuddling the whole ordeal had been.

Ryan had to go to work, and I do not envy him in the least right now, as I sit in my own bed marveling and tripping over the occurrences of the last twenty-four hours.

Austin and I left, and once I exited the house I was immersed once again in the sounds and sights of the rainforest outdoors, then Austin drove me back home to Douglas in his car.

At home I felt incredibly relieved to be there, as if I had doubted I would ever make it back at all. I was shaken to the point that I expect I would be were my life to be placed in serious danger. I did not, however, realize that precise sensation until just now, I was simply happy to be home.

I began to make pancakes. It took me awhile, but I was so happy to do it. I was marveling in the availability of the house, the ingredients, the utensils, the running water, the very air, in the house, and felt that by making the pancakes, which was fun in itself, I was doing a nice thing in repayment to my parents for what they had done for me. The interior designs of the house were amazing. I felt kind beyond measure. I recalled, at this point, the severe lack of towels and other conveniences back at Austin’s place, but rather than being annoyed I instead felt happy that I was no in a place where I did have things, such as food, and I could give them to Austin, and everyone else around me. I had no idea how it was happening, but I liked it. I found myself cleaning the dishes, the kitchen, and my room several times that day in truth, in a subconscious attempt to restore order to the world.

It is 11:00 PM now, 00:00 + 29 hours and at last my mind is beginning to quiet, I feel oddly refreshed, exhausted, and alive. I feel that I have come to peace with not knowing anything at all. My mind is still unraveling and reveling in the presence of my otherworldly cargo. It has definitely been a positive experience, and I feel that I’ve gained a lot. While earlier in my trip I had contemplated saying goodbye to all drugs forever, I think I will explore the other world again with Mescaline, but in my own home, and definitely alone. I feel like a time traveling shaman. I am tired, and yet not, and at a loss for what to do. Happy to be alive. Glad I took the time to write this all down. As I had hoped, writing it, re reading it, adding to it (this log), has helped me cope with what can only be classified as a permanently mind altering experience.

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 89094

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 22

Published: Dec 21, 2012	Views: 22,896

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LSD (2) : General (1), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (pill / tablet)

		 smoked
		 Cannabis

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   115 lb

First of all I must say I was very nervous. I had no idea exactly what to expect and I really didn't have time to process or question. I learned of the substance that morning and within about a hour I found myself sitting in front of My Love with two Sweet Tarts in hand (Matrix-style with a red in one hand and a blue in the other), asking which would I choose.

My Love ended up letting me take both while he stayed sober (well more sober heh) to be a sort of trip-sitter, a solid ground if I ever needed it, which was quite a sacrifice and I'm very grateful.

He placed the two in my mouth and I realized there was no turning back now. I sat there and a flood of questions started coming to mind. When would I feel it? How long will it last? What will be the first sign? ...blahblah blah... My Love answered a few of my questions and then told me to just calm down and get ready to go. We were planning on going to our destination to meet up with M and trade a sack of marijuana for the 2 hits that were left.It was about I'd say 5 or 6 in the afternoon by now. The sun was still high in the sky and my experience had just begun.

The car ride down the Interstate 40 was nerve racking. I was constantly moving and hyperaware of any sensation, more due to the nervousness more than anything else. I tend to be a nervous person when dealing with anticipation and this experience was no exception.

My Love wanted to stop in at the liquor store on the way to our destination to buy a bottle of wine, and I was to purchase it. By this time, about 30 minutes into it, I really didn't feel any different and started having my doubts. I got out of the car and walked across the parking lot. There was a surprisingly large amount of people at the liquor store and it made me feel weird about going in. I just played it cool though, and walked right in past all the rednecks and frat boys and on to the wine isle. I noticed right away that the reflection of the bottles on each other tripped me out. The labels bending around the refractory of the liquid inside seemed strange and slowed. I quickly looked away and walked over to My Love's side so as to not bring unwanted attention to myself. I whispered to him something strange had happened and he just smiled and picked out a bottle and handed it to me. The line up front was concerningly long, but then a opening suddenly presented itself. I didn't want to look the guy in the eyes, since I could feel my pupils were stretching much larger than necessary. Both me and My Love noticed me acted weird and stated a halfhearted 'Wow.' when I approached. It seemed like he could tell something was up but I'm pretty sure he was way off with whatever he assumed.

We finally left and headed on to our destination. I told My Love to put on Jefferson Airplane, I've grown a fondness for classic rock since starting college. I had stated if I ever came across doeses I wanted to listen to 'White Rabbit' and I finally got my wish. We turned it up and I laughed the whole time and My Love even sang along which only made it even more perfect. I like to think back and refer to that moment as the moment I knew I was beginning to trip. The windows were down and the music was perfect. The trees and grass surrounding the road were a vibrant green and seemed more alive than usual. I could do nothing but smile.

We finally arrived at our destination. It had been about an hour since I had taken them. We drove up to M's apartment and went in. He greeted us with a nice welcome and invited us in. He soon figured out I had already taken them and was beginning to trip. He seemed to get excited about tripping almost instantly. And quite honestly, I was ready for someone else to join me on my journey. Though I'm not exactly very close with M, I was open to experience it with him.

So now it got more interesting. We went into his room and I sat on his black and white striped couch...you might remember it, it was in the old Russellville house. We smoked a bowl or two and I sat back and just watched the manifestations of my creative brain.

At first the visuals were subtle. The carpet seemed to move within itself randomly when I concentrated on it, but for the most part the effects had not brought forth their full potential just yet. M proceeded to put on some fuckin' CRAZY music, some kind of techno shit that quickly sent my brain into overdrive. I folded the paper sack the wine bottle had been in into a series of folds and started making shapes and random, strange folds with it. I think I probably fascinated myself with that for almost an hour. The folding was more of something to occupy my hands while my brain went on strange tangents about all kinds of subjects, most of which I can't recall. I was actually very surprised at how intellectual the experience was. I spent most of the trip thinking of all kinds of things.

By now the trip started to show its true colors and M started tripping as well. I went down the hall to find the wood door to the bathroom to see what would happen. I looked at the wood grain, and it was amazing. It was shifting and melting everywhere. I felt that I could touch it and it would have rippled like water. I stared at it for a little while, but then someone needed the bathroom so I shifted my attention else where. I went back to the bedroom and listened to more crazy music. By this time my trip was in full swing. The carpet was moving, shifting; the posters on the walls had their own life about them; the striped couch continuously created all kinds of optical illusions. Everything in the room had a life about it and every texture created a new experience. Time and space lost their hold on my mind as well.

I eventually asked for a piece of paper to draw on, and M handed me everything I needed. I meticulously drew a humming bird approaching a flower, and worked on that for a while. I noticed that there were two pieces of paper on top of each other, and I kept seeing pictures behind the one on top as if drawn on the other piece of showing through the thin paper. I saw eyes mostly, eyes of a dragon or just decorative eyes with no real identification. I tried to follow the sketching of one of these eyes but soon the image shifted into something else. I then drew my 'power' animal with the eye I had draw which supposedly is a deer. The deer ended up having peacock-eye feathers at the ends of its antlers and were meant to give the aire of a unisex animal.

I drew for a long time and everyone eventually left the room. I was so involved in my drawing that it was no concern of mine. I actually liked the alone time. I was able to explore my surroundings without anyone there to cause me to feel self-conscious and I was so involved with trying to create the expressions showing themselves to me I didn't even really feel alone at all.

All of this was a crazy experience for me. It was my first time, and I tried to keep everything as positive and light-hearted as possible so as not to trigger any kind of 'bad' trip. If I ever get the opportunity again I will explore the deeper side much more than I dared this time though not to say I didn't have some real revelations.

When everyone came back into the room I suggested we go for a walk around the block. They seemed a bit reluctant but then warmed up the the idea. We went outside when the the sun was just setting so I would say it was about 8:30. The dusk sky looked amazing. I had trouble taking my eyes away from it actually. We walked for was seemed like forever even though in actuality it was about 15 to 20 minutes. I specifically remember M handing me a strange little white piece of gum while walking down the road. I put it in my mouth and suddenly was overwhelmed with all kinds of crazy sensations of taste, texture, and strange simple movements of my jaw all combined was almost too much for my brain to process and walk at the same time. I literally gasped with amazement and almost fell over in the middle of the street.

I then decided to go walking through someones yard with tall vibrant green grass. The grass was so strange. I had no real concept of how tall it actually was and it seemed the more I walked through it the taller it got or the smaller I became, both seemed equally plausible at the time. M soon followed and thought it was equally crazy.

We got back and I walked around a little bit more before going inside. Being outside was a wonderful experience and I didn't really want to be inside but it was dark and the night is not the time to walk around such a place especially tripping balls on acid. So I eventually went inside and back to his room to smoke a little more and chill. At this point I can't really remember anything specific. I mostly sat back and explored my thoughts and more strange visuals for I guess a few hours. I remember watching people talk among themselves and almost feeling as if I wasn't actually in the room with them but just observing from some third party perspective. The intellectual side of the trip came into full swing now and I was lost in thought for at least an hour or so I believe.

The next thing I know it's 1 or 2 in the morning and My Love started to express his want of heading back to my residence since he had to work in about 5 hours. I didn't want to leave. I was completely awake and mentally engaged with no sign of comedown any time soon. I soon realized we needed to go though and we said our parting words.

The ride back I become extremely self analytical suddenly. It was a cycle of self doubt, self comfort, and self realization. It never became a true negative experience but I did learn some personal patterns and 'flaws' of my personality. When I look back it helped me come to terms with myself on a very real and personal level. I am a better understood person because of this experience and I was able to see things clearly about my personality for the first time in a way. During all of this, My Love let me know I was probably coming down a little and things tend to swing toward the negative if you allow it. I doubted my actions throughout the night and questioned if I expressed the right energy towards the people around me. I became slightly disgusted with myself at one point but then realized the negative energy was completely unnecessary and I was determined not to ruin this experience with shallow thoughts of social anxiety.

After the nice long talk, we finally arrived at the house. my Love was very tired by now and suggested we put on 'Blue Planet', an animal documentary of ocean creatures. I've been fascinated with animals my whole life so I have quite a collection of such entertainment. I watched 2 episodes with 'wide-eyed-wonder' haha. I have watched all the DVD's at least 3 times each but it was like I literally was seeing it for the first time again. I was completely amazed at the sights in front of me. There were millions of shinny silver fish all swimming together as one massive organisum with the ability to mold and shape itself. There were massive whales diving slowly into the deep and strange translucent creatures with huge dark eyes and glass like fins floating about the darkness of the deep ocean. All kind of things! I was blown away for a good hour just watching this show.

By this time My Love was asleep and I was trying to occupy myself. The wood floor no longer shifted like it did when I first arrived so I knew I was coming down. I ended up watching an 80's music infomercial for a ridiculous amount of time but I finally snapped out of it and changed the channel to man that was telling a story of being bitten by a diamondback rattle snake in the middle of the wilderness. He had an amazing story and I hung on his every word of the ordeal.

I also watched a CNN special call 'Tibet's warriors' on the Tibet monks dealing with the oppression of the Chinese government. A small part of me became Buddhist I must say. Their story was one of honor and courage that I rarely see in our contemporary society.

I ended up not resting my eyes until about 6 in the morning. I say rest my eyes because I never really fell asleep. My mind was still engaged but slowed due to the 10 hour trip. I woke 4 hours later completely refreshed and ready to see what the day would hold. I felt I had an after glow almost and I was extremely content. I went all day feeling very mentally alive and almost having an aire of rebirth. The next night was when I finally got a true night's sleep.

When I look back I had one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I was able to look at life unbiased and open to interpretation. My mind felt clear and revived. I realized I am the master of my reality and I can always choose how to react and to react negatively is both detrimental and unnecessary in most cases. I feel more alive, really. I've been sleeping in a normal daily routine for so long I didn't even realize, but now I am awake. The main difference is I've been exploring the spiritual side of myself again. I used to be Christian but that idea slowly grew stale and impersonal. Buddhism is one of the ideas I will explore more now though to be solid in one way of thinking is not my goal. All in all, I had a wonderfully profound experience and I will hopefully never forget it.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 73201

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Dec 25, 2012	Views: 37,945

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LSD (2) : Small Group (2-9) (17), First Times (2)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 0.5 tablets
		 oral
		 MDMA
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 0:00
		 2 glasses
		 oral
		 Alcohol - Beer/Wine
		 (liquid)

		   T+ 0:35
		 0.5 tablets
		 oral
		 MDMA
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 1:05
		 0.5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 1:55
		 0.5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 2:55
		 0.5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 2:55
		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 0:00
		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Nitrous Oxide

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   57 kg

Before I begin I would firstly like to state that I am 19 years old and up until mid-2009 I had never tried any entheogenics. I began smoking cannabis in 2007 and up until Dec '08 I tried my first entactogen (MDMA). Up until now I have experimented with a few over-the-counter drugs and have been researching the clinical health of the mental states of consciousness and the effects of psychedelic drugs. Here we go...

It was a Saturday night and I was hanging out with my good mates N and D. The night began at approximately 8:30. We were all having a party at a good friend's house and everybody was having a great time partying on

8:45 PM: I ingested half a E and washed it down with a beer or two, socializing was good fun and I was in a collective mind state, (bear in mind I knew about 5 or 6 people out of the 13 or so people there) at this point in time I was just dancing away to the music that was playing.

8:56 PM: I am still waiting for the effects to kick in, we have now smoked all the cigarettes we had (I don’t advise anyone do this when effects are in motion). I drove down to the nearest service station to stock up on supplies, at this point no effects are present.

 [Erowid Note:
Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]

9:15 PM: back at the party I am starting to feel a slight shift in my state. No major effects yet just, mild mydriasis and a heightened motivation to dance!

9:20 PM: I decide to take the other half of the E to regulate a sigma effect. My friend N takes 1 blotter of LSD. By this time I feel the effects begin to increase and my mood is beginning to elevate.

9:35 PM: a taxi arrives and we jump in and drive to another party for our friends 21st birthday. By now I am in love with everyone and my emotions are so strong followed with the pulsating charge. Mentally I am beginning to see a change in perception, my friends are beginning to feel it also.

9:50 PM: we arrive at the party and by this stage I have reached my first plateau. Socializing has never been easier. In my life I have grown up with very low self-esteem. Any of these feelings are completely eradicated from my mind. I was in total control. Now is the time when I ingested half a tab of blotter LSD.

10:20 PM: I can feel the LSD beginning to take its hold by this point I am in a state of bliss and my visual field is taking on its effects. N and I stand together and he says to me that we should go back to D’s house cuz we set up his back shed with couches, bongs, and a fireplace. I thought that sounded like a great idea for I wanted to go somewhere and trip out and absorb as much as I could out of the night. As I looked down at the gravel near my feet I stared for approx 15 – 20 seconds to see very mild movement. Mentally I was relaxed but slightly anxious. I have had LSD a few times now and I have become comfortable with the effects of it. N and I decide to go for a walk and check out the playground that was 50 meters or so away from the party.

10:30 PM: We approach the park and the light is very dim due to the bushy surroundings and lack of street lights. As I looked at the sand I remember having unusual sensations rush through my body, only mild but still very intriguing. We decide to walk back to the party and gather our friends and try making a move. I feel mild effects from the LSD and the E has taken its full effect. I by this stage am incredibly sociable and get caught up in conversations on how good acid is ha-ha. By this stage according to the Shulgin rating scale I was having a plus-1 (+) experience.

10:40 PM: N approaches me and asked me when I wanted to take the other half. I was up for it so we both walked off again and took our other half, still feeling amazing from the E and I felt a deep connection to my friends and shared with them my feelings. I had no shame and deep things didn’t seem to bother me in the telling of.

11:00 PM: D’s younger brother came and picked us up from the party. Here is where it started to get interesting. Up until now I was quite simply euphoric and socializing with people I seen. As we were driving I noticed a shift in perception. It felt to me like I had just started coming up: no major effects present, just a comfortable buzz and general conversation about how everyone’s night is coming along.

11:40 PM: we arrive at D’s house out in the bush: approximately 60 square meter shed with a sliding door tin walls and roof, steel truss structure with a fire place on the north wall situated in the middle of the shed, with 3 couches and a table. At this stage I was starting to wonder as to whether or not I would feel much of the blotter. I was still raging from the pill. I thought about how I was feeling and felt a strange sensation come over me. Up until now I was paying little attention to my visual field and was more or less captivated by my thoughts. It wasn’t until I realized that I was not talking to anyone that I looked up at N who was sitting next to me. I then found that I was beginning to zone pretty hard. His face contorted and his eyes were rotating in circles! I fell into a trance and the longer I looked at him the more distorted he became. I was drawn into it; I looked into his eyes and then it hit me!!! I had moved into a stage 2 experience (++ experience).

I saw myself in his eyes and as I was sitting there in awe. I flinched and felt a powerful cathexis charge rush over me. Mydriasis was in full effect now. I felt an intense connection with my friends overcome me and that's when my depth perception and clarity of thought elevated to a new level that I have never been before. D then jumped on his pelvic exercising apparatus and began to do pelvic thrusts. I can’t remember laughing so hard in my life prior to this event. He then fell off it onto the floor face first laughing out of control. My visual field was totally encompassed by the effects. By now I had moved into the next wave. Everything in my vision was strobing and morphing to unusual designs. I decide to take another half a tab for I had never felt this in control. After sticking it under my tongue we decide to smoke some of the high grade hydroponic marijuana that we had sitting in the bowl. As I pulled the cone I looked at the cone piece and once I had pulled it I sat back and felt my head swelling with an intense euphoria. About 10 seconds later it hit me full force and I was tripping out max!

From here on I can’t for the life of me remember time and it's span. From here on I will describe how I moved from my stage 2 experience to the stage 3 (+++ experience) and here is where the meat of my experience pours forth.

I was sitting in my chair having bongs and losing myself in the experience when I looked up towards the wall in front of me and could see vivid movement of nuts and bolts scaling up and down the wall. I drew my gaze to the other side of the shed to see that my vision was picture framing and every inch of eye movement would disrupt what was there. By this stage nothing was staying still. Amongst all this chaos I had found deep, deep clarity and an overwhelming sense of power shot through me like a cannon. I could feel the extreme dilation of my pupils. I looked around the room as if I was a god and could create anything with my mind.

I went outside of the shed to get some fresh air for the shed was completely tripping me out. As I went outside I looked at the ground to see morphing geometrical shapes. This was not all too exciting as the poor levels of light under the sky. Then I looked up and to my amazement the moon had the most vibrant blue and purple aura around it and was beginning to go banana shaped. The stars were infinitely bright and were constantly changing to form constellations. The sky hollowed out, tunneling towards the moon. At this point I felt a presence that I had not felt up until this point. I was in a complete state of mental control: I felt invincible, I thought some very profound thoughts and delved into my psyche, I was prepared for anything. I was dwelling upon the thought of having a bad trip and how it is a concept that freaks the fuck out of anyone to the point where they would never want to go near this substance. I have done highly extensive research on entheogenic drugs and how they all target the 5-HT receptors (5-hydroxytryptamine) receptors. I was well aware of how LSD mimics serotonin and I had a positive mind set accepting that once I confront a bad trip I will most likely learn the most about myself in that time for my deep subconscious would be revealed. Instantly after I thought this I felt the most profound sensation of spiritual awareness and was immersed in the knowledge that poured out of my inner-most thoughts. Indeed my in-depth knowledge saved me in this situation for I was temporally insane.

I returned to the shed and my friends were indeed tripping out just as much as I was. The thing about our experience together is that my friends and I are religiously interested in the human psyche and all the aspects of psychology. I have read books on psychology of human relationships and all of my knowledge seemed to suddenly emerge with a depth and clarity that I have never perceived in my entire life. I had activated the universal mind. Anything I thought about would set off a cathexis charge (very strong energetic charge given of before emotion is felt). I walked down the path towards the house to get a drink. As I looked down I noticed everything looked like Lego: the weeds and grass had a 2D shape and colours would fluctuate through the strains of grass. I was amazed as to how my entire world had changed and my perception of reality was at a cosmic level of understanding yet at the same time I was completely and utterly hypnotized by the bright patterns that had taken over my visual field.

As I returned to the shed my friends had reached the same level as I had and were smoking more bongs and falling deeper and deeper into themselves. Now is when we decided to have nangs. D was up first. He inhaled the nitrous and covered his face with a blanket to see the visuals. About 15 seconds later he cried out with a fright “what the fuck I’m a camel where am I are get me out of here!!!” N was quick to pull the sheet from over his eyes and assured him where he was and who he was. This was a minor incident that had no major negative after effects, it came around to my turn for a nang. I inhaled the gas and then I pulled the sheets over my eyes. All I could see was blackness with a small static blur in the center of my eyes. As the strobing from the nang took full force the buzz encompassed my whole vision and I felt a new definition of pain. Whether or not it was pain I would never know I can just clearly remember thinking those exact words. I pulled the sheet away from my eyes to see that my whole world was still moving in front of my eyes. As I looked up I felt that I was telepathically connecting to my friends and the longer I sat there the deeper into my trance I went. As I looked at N everything behind him began to take on multilayer vision with a slightly transparent double of what I was actually seeing. The room was overcome by bright green flickering haze and once again I could see my face in the place of my friends head. I had a crazy epiphany that I was on the verge of death but the thought of it didn't bother me in the least. I was so at one with myself that I had felt completely detached from my body and felt that what was in my head was the only thing keeping me in my body.

I felt that I was at one with everyone in the room, we had a powerful connection and it brought us all together. I sat there flooded with thoughts of wisdom and a clear retrospective view on where my life was heading. I realized that I had been kidding myself all along thinking that I had my shit together. Then it all made sense I was simply passing the time and wasting my potential to sow wisdom and knowledge to those who need it.

I had reached a critical point now. I was at war with myself and felt feelings that I had not felt since before puberty. I felt a strong feeling of sympathy towards my family and for the first time in my life I had truly grasped just how much suffering I had endured and put my family through. I felt strong love and friendship towards everyone in the room. I was in a Zen state and I didn't want to leave it.

It wasn’t until now that I felt a powerful sensation that I had never felt before in my life. I could hear what my mate was saying in spite of no lip movement from him. I had awakened my ESP. The most bizarre part was when I saw his face, whatever expression he had, I felt. ESP is not what everyone thinks it to be. I gained insight into the situation and realized that time was relative and can be bent to our will. Minutes felt like hours and the entire night lasted an eternity.

N was in wonderland and D was in a state of fluctuating emotions and thought patterns. There was a tinge of perplexity accompanied by strong emotional charges that kept persisting throughout the lot of us. D decided to switch the light out to see how the visuals would be. He flicked the lighter on and to my amazement I saw what looked like two mirrors facing each other. The light traced off in front of my eyes with at least 100 repetitions. This truly blew me away. I had never seen full tracers up until now.

I had entered a new dimension. I had become fully lucid and saw vivid shapes lined with a green and yellow neon aura. I looked at my hand to see it age 5 lifetimes in colour and texture. I noticed small octagon shapes emerge with a brightness that astonished me. Suddenly my entire hand was covered in this green glowing pattern and my hand became a 3D pixelated structure resembling the first stages of 3D animation. Skin colour was not there and I became a hollow frame off an ethereal existence. I was complete. I became enamored in knowledge and I could grasp anything that I could conjure up.

As the morning crept in, light began to bring me back slowly to reality. After it was all over I was in a total state of serenity I carried out the rest of my day with ease and finished off the night with the best sleep I have had in a long time. I plan to do this again. LSD is truly a mind blowing instrument into the human subconscious and I advise anyone who is interested in self-development and personal growth to try this but make sure the set and setting are comfortable and relaxed for this aspect of the trip is crucial in the outcome of a trip. Being somewhere not in your control can prove disastrous. Remember that you can do anything you put your mind to, control your thoughts and emotions for in a situation like this - they can be your worst enemy.

Peace!!!

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 81325

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 19

Published: Dec 26, 2012	Views: 14,133

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MDMA (3), LSD (2), Nitrous Oxide (40) : Combinations (3), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 3.5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD

		   T+ 0:00
		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 8:00
		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   200 lb

It was around 12:30am when a very peculiar looking character rolled up on a dark red moped. 'Sorry for making you guys wait so long,' he told me and my friends. He reached inside his little fanny pack that was tied around his belt a pulled out a huge block of bubblelicious bubble gum wrapped in cellophane. 'Well here's your 'cid. I put an extra one in there for having to wait so long.' Me and my crew knew that the fucker was supposed to be there at least 4 hours ago. 'And you know, I have an extra one in my pocket that I'm probably not gonna eat anyway so you can have it too.' He took it out of his pocket and set it on top of the brick.

There were 18 hits in total for a group of four acid veterans who were very sketchy about this whole bubblegum business; it was the first we'd ever heard of such a thing. It was me who had found this dude giving us the stuff, and we were already beginning to think we were getting ripped off. Acid is very hard to come by in the great state of Texas, so we knew there would be hell to pay if this son of a bitch runs off with our cash. I gave the man $160 and he drove away in on his moped. 'What kind of drug dealer drives a fucking moped!?' my friend Cody asked, 'I had better fucking trip or I'm gonna find that guy and kick his ass!' Our patience wore thin as the guy was 4 hours late, but there it was, 16 hits plus 2. Now something you must understand, acid is not a fairly common drug around these parts. Hell, I felt proud of myself that I had even found any, but when you do find some it's usually weak and you have to take so much of it that you get pissed for spending all that money.

Four of the hits were not ours; someone had given me some money and bought some. This will affect my trip later so it's imperative that you know this. The actual bubblegum looked very legit, you could actually see the acid dripping out of the hole that the guy had made to drop it in. We split up the brick four ways so that we each had 3 hits, and split the 2 extra hits in half so we each had a half. We all started chewing at the same time and went back inside to play video games. So the crew which consisted of Zac, Cody, Johnny, and me, were inside waiting for the stuff to hit us playing Halo 1. 'You know I've got a feeling this is actually legit,' Cody said. 'Why?' I asked. 'Because I feel really relaxed, and usually I feel relaxed when I'm about to trip the fuck out.' He was right, the room had been absolutely quiet for the past 15 minutes, not a word uttered, were we already frying to the point to where we were zoning out. It wasn't too much longer before me and Zac noticed that we were doing incredibly bad at the game. 'Alright dude, I can't concentrate,' said Zac. 'Yeah me neither.' So we went out to the garage to smoke cigarettes. Even though I don't smoke, might as well follow the crowd.

It was like we transitioned into a different world when we walked through the garage door. It hit us all at once. I noticed that the car door for the garage was breathing in and out, and a bottle hanging from the ceiling by a wind catcher from a party we'd had earlier in the year was swinging violently back and forth, but it wasn't. I was trying to hold myself together because I didn't know if everyone else was tripping like I was. 'Dude, I'm fucked up!' said Johnny, and a wave of laughter came over all of us, and it kicked in the full effects of this wonderful drug. 'I feel like dancing!' said Cody, and he started doing the weirdest dances known to modern man. He did a move where he makes his body limp and pulls himself back up by his collar. For a moment, I thought he was an actual ragdoll, the thought caused me to laugh hysterically. I looked around at the garage and noticed that everything's shadow was moving, but the object itself was staying still, and the garage closet was moving as though the wind were blowing it in and out.

It was around this time I wanted to go and relax and enjoy my trip. 'I'm gonna go inside and lay down,' I said. As I walked through the door I noticed Zac's picture. It was an oriental dragon flying through the clouds with some sort of kanji next to it. The dragon looked as if it was coming out of the picture and moving and twisting it's long body through the room as the clouds came out with it. 'Wow,' I said. How something so beautiful can be so bad? The dragon turned towards me and opened its mouth and inside I saw the earth, the room was making noise and the clouds seeping out of the poster started making thunder and lightning, it was so overwhelming. I started to notice that my eyes were burning and I blinked, and it was all gone, and the room was quiet again. The dragon was back in his frame just gliding through the background. 'That was cool.' It was all that I could say, the experience had left me in complete awe. How long had I been standing there I wondered, had my thoughts began to rip the very fabrics of time and space? I knew I was in the thick of it; I'd gone down the rabbit hole and walked through the doors of perception. Now all I could do was take the ride.

1:45 AM. I was still standing in the middle of the living room, wondering if what I had just seen was possible. I could feel the beast coursing through my body. My senses were amplified so much to the point where I didn't need my glasses. I heard footsteps coming from the garage and heard the back door knob jiggle, in came the rest of my crew all laughing hysterically, which in turn made me laugh. 'How long have you been standing here?' asked Zac. 'I don't know, not that long I guess.' We then retreated back to Zac's room. While we walked down the hall it seemed to get longer and longer. I thought I heard the song 'For Your Love' by the Yardbirds for a second but even now I don't know whether it was reality or just some fucking strange loop in my mind's inability to perceive what was going on.

We sat down and smoked some grass. The room felt like a capsule in which endless possibilities were drawn on the walls. We all couldn't sit still. It was amazing we were all thinking each other's thoughts. There was no need for communication, simple grunts, laughs, and hand gestures allowed us to understand what we were each seeing or hearing. Zac's room in itself was a trip, different characters from other people's minds were drawn onto the walls, the people's creativity splattered on the surfaces for an everlasting moment, all moving and distorting. I could actually taste their colors and I felt as though everything was a part of me. 'Shit won't stop moving man!' exclaimed Cody, pulling me out of my trance. He had removed his shirt and was sweating profusely; he looked like a wildman, someone who was raised by wild beasts in the jungle and couldn't possibly fit in with the rest of society.

2:30 AM. I didn't feel comfortable sitting down; there was an urge to move so that nothing could grow too attached to my body. If I did sit, I knew I wouldn't move for hours. I got up and went down the spiraling hallway to the living room again. I noticed Zac was in the kitchen drinking a soda on which the graphic was spiraling round and round as the can itself remained still. I too was very thirsty.

I grabbed one and opened it, my senses all amped up to near superhuman perceived the opening can as an explosion and gave me a scare. Zac laughed at my stupidity, so did I. I drank from the kaleidoscopic can. The liquid felt like electricity quenching my thirst but making my body's senses go haywire as if someone threw a wrench into the mechanics, an electric impulse that started at the back of my neck, went down my spine to my feet, then up again to the back of my brain. As I moved my head back to its regular position, I felt the soda swirling all throughout my being, like a cold snake burrowing through my innards to kill my thirst. 'This is the best soda I've ever drank man!' I said while laughing, I felt as if everything in life was meant to be joyful and nothing could make it bad. This is where my mind slipped off the tracks.

I put the rest of the acid back in the fridge so that it would be fresh for the guy who bought it. I looked just to check and see if it was still there, there were supposed to be four individual pieces of gum, but there were only three. I felt fear and anger creep up my spine like the way magma flows to the mouth of a volcano. 'WHO THE FUCK ATE ANOTHER FUCKING HIT!?' My words seemed to make the very earth itself shake, 'THERE WERE FOUR FUCKING HITS THAT WEREN'T OURS IN THE FRIDGE AND NOW THERE'S ONLY THREE! WHO THE FUCK TOOK IT!?' By this time Cody had run to the kitchen and was freaking out, 'Dude I swear to God I didn't take it.' 'Those weren't my fucking hits man. This isn't cool!' All of a sudden I didn't feel safe, I felt that everyone was my enemy, no one could be trusted. I stormed off to the living room in a rage. All of the walls were starting to close in on me, the floor turned to slime and the ceiling started to melt and hang down like goo. I was scared by the thoughts of what was going to happen if I didn't have all the hits. My world was imploding and it felt as though I was already dead. Then, I heard Zac's words and they snapped me back to reality, 'Oh shit dude, this is gonna make him have a bad trip.' He was right, I had already started decomposing from the inside out. I knew that if I started losing it, everyone else would too. I have to take control, push the thoughts aside, what's done is done there's no way to change it. I forced my mind to forget the nightmares that were to come, stay in the now and forget about the future. 'Ok guys, what's done is done, fuck it, I'm not gonna have you guys have a bad trip because of me. So just forget about it, let's move on.'

3:45 AM. With the situation over with I soon forgot about the missing hit. Objects were dancing back and forth, and pictures with different characters in them were coming to life before my very eyes. Music! I thought, Music would make this a whole lot cooler. I put my hand inside my pocket and pulled out my MP3 player and went back to Zac's room the rest of the crew was out smoking cigarettes. I lay out on the bed and looked up at the ceiling. Zac has a lot of stars drawn onto his ceiling with chalk. I focused on the stars while listening to Planet Caravan by Pantera. The song is very psychedelic. It's about a space caravan and has a very fluid sound.

As it played I closed my eyes and felt as though I was floating through the sky, looking down through the clouds and seeing the entire city's lights from a bird's eye view. Then I soared higher until I broke through the atmosphere and was flying through space. I saw the world in all its purple beauty spiraling through the cosmos. I opened my eyes; I was back in the room looking at the stars. I concentrated on the ceiling, and one by one the stars started to peel off like stickers, then they hovered right underneath the ceiling and started waving like a flag, all in synchronization. Stars then started sprouting out like flowers in a fast stop motion film. I saw a shadow move across the room and a wavy figure standing in the doorway.

4:30 AM. 'Dude what're you doing?' Zac said with a chuckle. 'Just lie down and put this on.' I handed him the MP3 player. I went to go lay on the couch in the living room but I noticed a guitar and an amp in the back of the room. Now, I'm an avid guitar played, no Eddie Van Halen perhaps but I do know my way around a fret board. This guitar was a Dean From Hell. It's a blue guitar with lightning on it and was just sitting next to an amplifier. I touched it, felt the 'energy'. I picked it up plugged it in and began to play. According to what the crew was saying I had never played so good in my life. As I played I looked down at the lightning on the guitar, when I would make a note, the lightning would fluctuate. I felt as though that I could cause the beginning of new life or destroy it with this guitar. I could disorient the very universe with the flick of the whammy bar. And it was good.

5:30 AM. Around this time I went outside and saw the purple sky - the sun was coming up. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I immediately ran inside and got the crew. 'Come outside its beautiful!' We all ran out and examined the spectacle. The clouds seemed to be objects floating and casting their shadows upon the canvas that was the sky. The purple and golden rays seemed to be cleansing the sky of all impurities. We all stood for about an hour.

7:00 AM. Everyone started to get tired; after all it had been about eight hours since we dropped it, plus the endless amount of waiting we had to endure for the stuff to actually get to us. The trip was starting to wear down and everyone had been lying in their sleeping spots for a while, still tripping and shaking. Strangely I didn't feel tired; I was just up and walking around looking at everyone wrapped up in their blankets like caterpillars in cocoons. The thoughts about the stolen hit were still in the back of my mind. Zac was still awake, and I was asking him about whom he thinks might have taken it 'I don't know man, but I have an idea for you if you're that worried about it.' 'Lay it on me.' 'You should go and eat one more hit, and tell the guy that theirs 2 hits on each gum.' It was a brilliant plan, one that would make even the Watergate masterminds say wow. At least it was to me. So I went to the fridge and opened it up and took one more hit.

7:15 AM. This amounted to my fourth one. It didn't even take five minutes for me to feel the familiar rushing sensation. I was locked in my dreamland again. There was a girl who I have never seen before just laying out on the couch, I didn't even know when she had gotten there, or at least I couldn't remember, I guess she woke up because of my constant shuffling about the house. 'I need to go home,' she told me, 'Where's Joey?' Joey? I knew who she was talking about, but I had no idea that he was here. 'I don't know, I'm still tripping. Just look around the house, I'm sure he's around here somewhere.' Her make-up was poorly done, and although she had a nice body, she wasn't much to look at. 'Alright,' she told me, 'But look with me, I don't know whoever lives here and I just don't wanna be walkin' around in someone's house and...' Her words started to run together, and her mouth was producing sentences at a million miles per hour. I couldn't concentrate, I was completely zoned out on her poorly drawn make-up, melting face, and fast-talking mouth that didn't make any noise other than complete and total nonsense.

'What?' she asked. Was I talking? Did she hear me? Did I really say all those things to her face? 'I didn't say anything.' So we ended up finding Joey blacked out on the couch with a Seagram's 7 bottle in his hand. She woke him up and asked him to take her home. 'Fuckin' shit alright go get in the car.' I asked to go along since he was coming back anyway. 'Yeah whatever dude.' She got in the front seat and I got in the bed of the truck. At this point the trip was in full effect and was distorting my perception and amplifying everything again. As we took off I felt the truck rumbling underneath me. The ground was moving very fast. Maybe when we move, we ourselves do not move, but the earth itself rotates to create movement. This thought plagued my thoughts as I could not think of anything else. Then I felt the truck stop. The girl got out and left without saying a word, nothing more than a memory in my sick and twisted acid filled mind.

8:00 AM. When we had gotten back I felt a cool breeze as if the house wanted me to come back in. 'I'm gonna chill out here for a while man,' I told Joey, even though he probably didn't care. He shrugged his shoulders and went inside to pass out. I had never tripped during the day before. Drugs are never meant to be used during the early morning hours when nice upstanding average Joes kiss their average Janes and go off to work to contribute to society. The freaks are the ones who are out at night looking for that next rush, the next push to knock them into another reality, while the Joes and Janes sit in their nice little homes, cozy, not having a care in the world, the freaks, monsters, and junkies come out to have their fun. But, once every so often, one of the freaks will go out on a limb to push it as hard and as long as they can and wander around the average world, not being equipped to perceive or see with average eyes. Theirs are eyes that have seen other worlds and have lived in them for so long, that 'normal' is just a word, not a way of life.

As I sat on the porch bench nothing seemed to be really happening other than my senses being amplified. I looked at my arm. I have a natural bronze-like complexion and long hair, as I looked down my hair fell from my head and landed on my arm, I started to zone out, my arm started to turn into sand with my arm hair turning into small cactuses. Then it started to distort and little hills were starting to form. I had a desert on my arm, and my black hair started to curl around my arm. It formed into cracks which made my arm look like an even more realistic picture. I finally managed to tear myself away from the spectacle on my arm and looked straight ahead to the open yard and saw heaven.

8:30 AM. The yard was beautiful; I could see the leaf of every tree, each blade of grass, and every bug in radiant color. The whole thing looked like a big high definition T.V. and was so intense that it almost hurt to look at. Walk around the block, I told myself. Get everything out of this trip, you've just taken another hit, you've got another eight hours or so. So I popped in my MP3 player and started down the road. Everything was perfect, I was so overwhelmed by the beauty of everything that it was almost too fascinating to believe. The only way to describe the feelings would be to get in a near death accident, and learn to appreciate everything a little bit more. The road's gravel looked like small marbles that were moving around my feet when I came down onto the ground. Before I knew it I was back at the house.

11:00 AM. Acid is not always good to trip on when you're alone unless you're expecting it. When you are not alone, but everyone else is asleep, it's truly maddening. The want to talk to someone, to tell them what you are going through always helps, but it's very hard when the person is dead-ass asleep in front of you. I felt like I was going insane. The background of the house had seemed to go from wild and lively to dull and eerie. The sound of silence was killing me, what's to stop me from simply raising hell all over the house? Anything to stop the silence! No, I must remain calm, everything will be all right. I rolled a joint in hopes that it would calm my nerves, the acid had turned on me, I was now stuck in silence, gazing at the melting pictures of the house and trying to keep my feet away from the crumbling floor. Five hours or so of catatonic despair, total cosmic annihilation. Sitting. Waiting for I don't know what. Silence. No thoughts, no noise, just me and the blackness of space that now filled the room.

4:00 PM. Someone's at the door. It's Zac's mom. Luckily she's a hippy and would probably take some acid herself if she didn't have to do her own thing. 'ZAC! GET UP WE GOTTA GO GROCERY SHOPPING!' her voice echoed throughout the house and made the distorting hallway fluctuate like a wave. 'God damn it. OK! Fuck.' Zac got up slower than a glacier moves across Antarctica. 'Hey man, are you tripping again?' His face was twisted and had a very pale tone, I could almost see his skull. 'Yeah dude!' 'Alrighty man, hey do you want to come to the grocery store with us? I'm sure that'll be a fuckin' trip!' I decided to go, I didn't want to spend one more god damn minute in that house.

4:15 PM. Well as it turns out, the grocery store that we went to was one that I used to work at. Oh man, this is gonna be weird. As we walked up towards the store through the parking lot I started to have thoughts about when I used to work there. I saw the new recruits pushing carts, doing the old shit that I used to have to do, and now these poor bastards were doing the labor mindlessly like zombies. When we walked through the doors I felt the coolness of the inside air blow against my face like it was decontaminating my whole body. Then it got weird.

I saw familiar faces, faces that I hadn't seen in almost five years. I didn't even know that most of them still lived in the same area. Now here I was, tripping on acid and seeing all these faces and ones that I didn't even know, staring back at me. The aisles of the store we lined with different products proudly displaying the pictures of their post-prepared insides. They all looked very delicious. As we walked by the salads I looked at their packages, the pictures of the salads looked like they were coming off the package and were floating right there in front of me, it looked like I could just grab it. But I knew it was just the acid and if I did in fact make a reach I would look like a complete dumb-ass. I walked further down the aisle and people started passing me left and right. What the fuck? They were all looking at me, staring me down like they knew that my head was full of acid.

Finally we were headed to the check-out line, but there was one obstacle I still had to face. The girl who was at the check-out stand was one of my friends when I used to have a job. She didn't know about the freak inside me. The thoughts were starting to give me brain bubbles, what would I say? What would she think? Would she bring the hammer down? Would she..? Would she...? Would she...? 'I'm gonna go wait in the truck dude, I'm fuckin' trippin' balls man.' I had to get out of there. I couldn't fit in with this crowd especially since they already knew everything about me. As I waited in the truck I saw the people going into the store. Their faces all blurred and disoriented staring back at me. I couldn't handle it. I closed my eyes and watched the dancing colors and waited for the truck to move.

5:30 PM. The trip was starting to wear down, all of my senses were starting to come back to their original states. I felt tired, but the beast wouldn't let me go, not yet. My mind was telling my body that it needed rest, but the signals were all out of whack, making me tremble and shake. I lay down on the couch. I didn't want to be like this anymore. I closed my eyes and watched the visuals. I didn't know how long I was lying there. But I never once went to sleep. I was just an empty shell waiting for my soul to come back and take control.

10:30 PM. The visuals were long gone, but the weird feelings still remained. I didn't feel like I was tripping, but I was. My skin was very sensitive, and parts of my muscles were twitching and I wasn't controlling them. Am I going to be like this forever? 'Hey man, do you want me to take you home? You've been lying in that same position for hours, were you asleep?' Zac's voice seemed like I had not heard it in years. 'No, I've just been waiting for this fuckin' trip to stop. But yeah man, go ahead and take me home.' I got up and gathered my things and went out to the truck.

11:00 PM. On the way to my house, things seemed different. I would notice different visuals and get weird feelings about situations. I felt strung out, like the acid had taken my body and out it through the most gruesome therapy ever. The ridiculous amount of stress that was put on my body was beginning to show it's consequence.

We finally pulled up to my apartment, 'See ya later man, just go to sleep you'll be good tomorrow!' I said bye to my friend and went up the stairs to my apartment. Sanctuary. Then the feelings overwhelmed me, I was so tired I could barely walk. What a crude mistress LSD is, but oh so worth it. I got in the shower and turned the water on. The acid was still in me, but barely. The beast was finally dying and I was the victor. I felt every drop, every molecule of water hit my skin. I zoned out in the tub. I had to will myself out of the tub, I had gotten too relaxed and thought that I was in there for hours. When I got into bed I turned on my PS3 and started watching Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. I glanced at the clock.

12:45AM. I had tripped for 24 hours straight, incredible. I could barely see anything now and the body fry had calmed down enough for me to finally relax. I just lay there watching the movie, I don't even remember going to sleep. I just remember Dr. Gonzo and Raul Duke's words. Gonzo: 'We're your friends, we're not like the others.' Duke: 'GET IN.'

10:30 AM. When I woke up, I felt renewed, confident. I was just up and wanting to go out and do things. I could smell the air, taste the nitrogen and oxygen compounds that graced my nostrils. Everything was vibrant and radiant color. I was ready for anything, come whatever may I thought. Let's get this day started, with a new understanding.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 83671

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: 18

Published: Dec 27, 2012	Views: 10,434

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LSD (2) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 0.25 mg
		 oral
		 Pharms - Haloperidol
		 (daily)

		   T+ 0:00
		 3 bowls
		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 5:00
		 1 cig.
		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 5:00
		 2 bowls
		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 5:00
		 1
		 oral
		 Cannabis
		 (cookie / food)

		   T+ 5:00
		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD

		   T+ 12:00
		 1 mg
		 oral
		 Pharms - Alprazolam

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   220 lb

A quick question for all you readers. What do predestination, time travel, the afterlife, Larry David, Afroman, and the fundamental secret of reality all have in common? They were all part of the most ridiculous mindfuck I have ever experienced - and this was all after taking a mere 2 hits of LSD. Now, what I took may not have been LSD - one of the my friends told me the following day that it may have been PCP, and given that I had done acid once before, with no similar effects, he may have been right. So first, let me begin with a brief wrap-up of my first experience with LSD.

It was October of last year, and I took 6 hits...what can I say, I'm an adventurous kind of guy. It was fun - I felt great, and everything was rippling. That's about it. I enjoyed it an awful lot, so I decided that I would have to try it again some time in the near future. I dosed for the second time was March of this year. It was spring break, and I went down to Austin, TX to visit some of my friends from high school. My intention was to get extremely baked, and I decided that if I could find some acid, I would try that as well.

I started off the day by smoking a few bowls of some KB (I think it was Snow Caps) out of a Volcano. Good times. I later went over to the house of a friend I hadn't seen in a while, and I told him I was looking for some Lucy. He scored me 5 hits. While at his place, we proceeded to smoke some more bud. A lot more. We ripped a bowl of AK-47 out of a Roor, split a massive joint (I'm not sure how much was in it, but I'd say at least a gram), and took several hits out of a vaporizer - not a Volcano, but effective nonetheless. After the toke-fest had ended, I took 2 of the 5 hits he had gotten for me. They were in Sweettarts. Quite a tasty way to do it, if you ask me. He and his housemates had also just made some brownies out of 2 oz. of chronic. I’d never eaten weed before, so it wasn’t like I could pass it up. I ate one of the brownies and prepared myself for a fun time.

We sat there and watched a little bit of ‘Harry Potter and the Sorceror’s Stone’, a fairly good acid movie. As I was coming up, I noticed that the colors were enhanced. That was about it. After watching a little bit of the movie, I went outside to have a cigarette. My friend P was talking about how when you’re on acid, it feels like all your senses are merging into one. I’m not sure if I had heard that before. The first time I did acid, I didn’t feel any kind of synaesthesia. But as I sat outside smoking my cigarette, I started to realize what he was talking about.

Multi-sensory synthesis is pretty hard to describe, but basically, I started to feel like I was no longer an entity that saw, touched, tasted, smelled, and heard things. I was an entity that just was. I was purely existing, nothing more. I lost all awareness of any underlying mental processes, any sense of self, anything that could be broken down or examined. It was about this point that I understood everything, and I mean everything. Well...sort of. It made perfect sense at the time, but now, it just seems stupid. Basically I realized that the most fundamental philosophical truth of reality is the identity statement, i.e. that things are equal to themselves. This may have been brought about by the synaesthesia. My sensory experience was indivisible, and so I was overwhelmed by tremendous feeling of universal equivalence. At this point, I was completely freaking the fuck out. I called up a friend to tell him about my profound moment of enlightenment, but I only got his voicemail, so I proceeded to leave a babbling, incoherent rant that lasted so long I was interrupted by a message telling me I had used up all of my allotted time. What I said was something along the lines of “We are the one...we are the multisensory transconceptual multispatial one that is realized as the one that is now and was then and always will be. We are the one. We are the one. Mulisensory fusion...multisensory fusion... We are the one... we are the one that is now that was then that will be then that will be...”

Despite the fact I was tripping my balls off, I decided that playing some Guitar Hero was in order. My friend drove me over to his friend’s apartment, where GH was plentiful. I was totally stoked at showing everyone how good I was despite that I was out of my fucking mind. I don’t like to toot my own horn (on second thought, maybe I do) but I am fucking ridiculous at GH. Playing it while inebriated has never been a problem for me, but this time, it was. I sat there dumbfounded and watched as the notes went by and my rock meter quickly went from green to red to FAILURE.

And here’s where the shit hit the fan.

If I’m remembering this right, P turned to me and said “you’re dead.” His friends gave me a mock round of applause. A sober person would easily have known what he meant from the context: “you’re dead” meant that I had failed the song. But since I head full of acid and a bloodstream stuffed to the gills with THC, I took what he meant literally.

I thought that I was dead, and he was some sort of god, and all his friends were gods, and they were applauding because I had finally left my body and returned to the land of my people. I imagined myself as combination of Pan and Kratos from the God of War games. I screamed, “FUCK JESUS!!! FUCK MOSES!!! FUCK MUHAMMAD!!!“ I was anxious to find out which god I was. “WAS I JESUS??!! WAS I JESUS??!!“ I yelled. I know that doesn’t make any sense, seeing as how I had just said “FUCK JESUS!!!“ but...whatever.

This may not be all to the story - the details are hazy, but I’m pretty sure I changed my mind about the state of affairs a couple of times. I may have thought simultaneously I was a mere mortal who had been plucked from all of humanity because the gods admired me for my sense of humor, my outlook on life, and my contempt for religion in all its forms. That was what it appeared to be at first, but later on I jumped to the logical conclusion that at some point far into the future, a person had attempted time travel and accidentally destroyed the timeline, meaning that many years from now all of humanity will be sucked into a rift in the fabric of space-time. My friend and his friends were now benevolent time travelers who had plucked me from the masses because they liked my sense of humor.

So, after I realized I was dead, and the guy’s apartment was heaven’s waiting room of sorts, I was ready to get down to business: doing tons of drugs and having sex with whoever I wanted. You might be thinking that this is the point where I started sexually assaulting people left and right. Fortunately, you would be wrong, although I turned into quite the asshole, shouting “C’MON! WHO WANTS TO JUMP ON MY DICK??!! WHO’S FIRST??!! WHO’S FIRST??!! WHO WANTS TO JUMP ON MY DICK!!??” at the top of my lungs. P tried to calm me down, but it was no use. I didn’t see the point in calming down - I was in heaven, and there were no longer any social norms. Which is why I punched P’s friend. That’s what I was told, but I distinctly remember whacking the guy on the back with a GH controller.

Eventually, I got to be too much for P to handle, so he dropped me off at my other friend’s house, where I was staying for the week. I felt like I was trapped in a loop, although it was a good kind of loop, the kind where you feel great the whole while and there’s never any comedown. I also made a pass at my other friend’s girlfriend since I thought she was one of my sex slaves. Fortunately, he was there to keep me from doing anything stupid.

For a lot of this time, I was babbling incomprehensibly. I think the synaesthesia was responsible for this - my babblings felt like a verbal instantiation of the flow of time, something that would normally be processed by a specific part of my brain, but now, it all coming out my mouth. As the hours wore on, my conception of the heaven I was inhabiting changed further and further. This is where predestination came in. I thought that I was one of the people who got saved. I associated those who got saved and those who didn’t with Democrats and Republicans, which reminded me of Larry David, an outspoken Democrat, for some reason. I thought I was allowed into heaven because I was the only human who had guessed it right; I had correctly predicted that heaven would need to look just like the real world and obey the same laws of physics, with the endless sex, drugs, and other hedonistic delights being the only things that separated it from the real world. Of course, I had predicted no such thing before hand. I also perceived my surroundings as a sauna, where I would sit with the guys from Afroman and pass the bong waiting for hot bitches to walk in and fuck us. Of course, all of this had to be permissible within the laws of physics. While all these thoughts were running through my mind, I continued to say a bunch of random shit like “FOR THAT KINDA LOGIC I COULDA SLAPPED A BROWN BITCH ON THE DINK” (I meant “dick,” but I said “dink,” although I think I also said “dick.” By the time the trip was over, I was convinced that I was God, I was black, and that my entire life had been a trick I played on myself that I could only escape from by reciting a specific alphanumeric sequence. The code got simpler and simpler as I came down from the trip, alternating between the words “I am tha muthafuckin God” and single numbers or letters. By the time the trip was over, I think the code was 3. The trip came to an abrupt halt only because my friends forced Xanax down my throat.

Looking back at what I’ve written, I can see that a lot of it doesn’t make any sense. That’s because the trip didn’t make any sense. The truth is that I’ve only scratched the tip of the iceberg here. I could write much more, but this since this has already turned into a TL;DR report, I won’t. I don’t know if what I took was acid - the symptoms don’t match up, in my opinion - but I don’t seem to react to drugs in general the way that most people do. If what I took was acid, though, then those 6 hits I took last October must have been some unbelievably weak shit. The only thing that changed since October was that I had started taking .25 mg of haloperidol a day to manage my Tourette’s symptoms. Note the decimal in front of the 25. It’s a very small dose, and from what I’ve read, it isn’t supposed to exacerbate an LSD trip. If anything, it’s supposed to reduce the effects. I think it’s also worth noting that the entire time, I didn’t have any open or closed eye visuals. There weren’t even any ripples.

Overall, I definitely wouldn’t want to repeat the experience. Several of my friends were rightfully pissed off by my behavior. Fortunately, there was no lasting damage. I didn’t wind up at the hospital, and I didn’t lose any friends in the process. In fact, I was back to my regular old self the next day.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 71918

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jan 2, 2013	Views: 28,949

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Cannabis (1), LSD (2) : General (1), Combinations (3), Difficult Experiences (5), Small Group (2-9) (17)