		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 2.0 mg
		 oral
		 Pharms - Alprazolam
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 0:00
		 20 mg
		 oral
		 Pharms - Diazepam
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 1:00
		 2.0 mg
		 oral
		 Pharms - Alprazolam
		 (pill / tablet)

		   T+ 2:00
		 5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 2:00

		 smoked
		 5-MeO-DMT
		 (powder / crystals)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   180 lb

My life just took a horrible turn for the worst. I am not at my lowest point, however, thanks to being out on bail and away from the hellishness of being confined to a jail cell.

Where I fucked up, on a warm saturday night 10 days ago, was with the choice to eat the benzos, xanax and valium. I do not have benzo tolerance and rarely use them. I had finally come across some, and decided to eat a few. At around 5pm saturday, I ate 2mg of alprazolam and 20mg of diazepam (2 blue pills of each), figuring this would mellow me out after the hard week I had at work. I had no plans that night and the next day, so I made plans to get intoxicated. I had a small collection of acid and 5-meo-dmt, which I had not touched in months; but I did not specifically plan to trip.

Around 6pm, I am definitely intoxicated in a drunken-like way but with less euphoria, and some slight depression and confusion. I stumble to my small substance collection and eat 2 more blue xanax. I wanted to be a little bit more into oblivion, because I was feeling slightly depressed (which was from the benzos in the first place, but I didn’t realize it at the time).

From 6 to 7pm, I spent my time stumbling around out in my yard feeling almost like a kid. I ran around and rolled in the grass some. Then I got up and took off running into the house and back to my room. I pushed on the closed door thinking it was open a crack and my face whacked right into it. I could definitely feel the pain despite my intoxication.

I got into my room and got into my drugs. I pulled out a 5 strip of futurama blotter acid somewhere around 7pm, and ate it. I got really excited, thinking I was going to blast off to some wonderful psychedelic reality that I have read about but never had the balls to attempt. I then got out my aluminum foil pipe and threw an eyeballed amount of 5-meo-dmt in (it was what looked like 20 grains of salt). This would definitely not be something I would do sober, same with the acid.

I inhaled the rough tasting substance and held my breath. Soon a 'wangwangwang' noise surrounded me, like nitrous but much more menacing. A tense feeling spread through my body. I felt my heart get squeezed then break, and I was bleeding all over myself internally. I was so scared but knew there was nothing I could do so I just tried to accept that I was going to die for sure. I saw a bright white light and I couldn't see anything else. I do not remember what else happened.

The next thing I know, I am outside laying in my yard twitching all over violently, but not quite seizure-like. I see the clouds morphing shapes and colors, I see all imaginable colors floating through the sky. The sun was setting so I guess this was around 7:45. I also hear voices and a strange music that could never be synthesized. It sounded very alien and started to frighten me. I got up off the ground and started to stop twitching. I thought I was coming down from the acid, since I was confused. At this point I don't think I remember smoking the 5-dmt, I only think I am coming down from the acid already. Maybe its because the 5-dmt trip seemed to last many hours when it only lasted minutes, but I can't be completely sure.

I go in the house, which took a lot of effort because I was very uncoordinated. Everything was liquid, and I became convinced this was actually the real world, and that my experience of sober reality before this trip had illusioned me into thinking solids existed. Everything seemed so real; clearer than ever before, despite the melting, fractals and distortions.

I remember trying to figure out how to open a beer can. I sat on my kitchen table pressing the tab in wrong directions and could not do it. I ended up cracking a whole in it with a juice can opener and sipping through it. I kept hearing the strange alien music getting louder, and I heard voices in specific directions that startled me. I do not remember the specifics of what the voices said but suddenly it became apparent that I MUST get out of my house or something horrible was going to happen to me. I remember running out my front door in a panic... most of what happens next is pieced together from my neighbor's account, who was an acquaintance, and the police reports. I do recall some flashes of the events but most are clips that are a few nanoseconds in length that I can't accurately describe.

I ran to my neighbors house across the street and past a big yard (houses are spread out a good bit around here). I went up to his mailbox and dug my hands inside. He must have saw me run up to his door because he came out right away, and said 'Hey, (myname), what the hell are you doing?' with a slightly threatening but confused tone. I do remember him saying this but barely.

All I did was stare at him. He said I looked like a frightened, insane animal ready to pounce. He took a step back and balled up his fists. 'You don't look so good, how about we take a walk back to your house'.

I yelled 'HE TOLD ME TO COME. HE TOLD ME I WOULD FIND MY ANSWER HERE' I then sat down and curled up in a ball. 'Do you need me to call an ambulance?'

Then, I snapped. I don't know and can't guess what the fuck was going through my head at this point. I screamed in a non-human way, as it was later described, and tore into my neighbor. I beat and kicked at him with all I had. At first, he acted defensively and put up his arms to defend himself. Then he ran back into his house and came out with a can of mace. I ran away, sensing danger. It came to me again, apparently, that I must get into my neighbor's house, it was extremely important to my survival. By this time it was night.

My neighbor had gone back inside to call the cops. I walked around back of his house to his sliding glass doors. I remember touching the glass and wondering what was stopping my finger, because I could see right through the door. I thought of it as a force field of some type that was a test. If I could pass the test of getting past this freak, but purposely placed occurrence, I would find what I was looking for. I picked up a small metal table and whirled it into the glass force field with all the strength I had. It broke the glass and kept on going about five feet. I walked through the destroyed force field and felt like I had accomplished an important step of some kind of goal I was going after (which I unfortunately can't remember). I heard footsteps coming fast from the other side of the house. I sensed danger and leaped up the steps that were to my left. I went into a dark room and saw a glowing clock. (Its red letters burned into my memory, and now I cannot look at digital clocks without getting intense anxiety and confusion).

I picked up the clock and held it. Then my neighbor run in, flicks on the light and unleashes hell onto me. I remember thinking something like I was being attacked by supernatural forces. I couldn't breathe or see, my upper body was burning and I literally thought I had caught on fire. I fought for my life and thrashed into everything with my fists. I stumbled around and fell down the steps I had walked up. I screamed so loud many neighbors arrived before the cops did, keeping distance.

When the cops arrived my neighbor was on the ground holding his head. I was in the house breaking things and screaming. Cops rushed in with guns drawn. 'GET DOWN ON THE GROUND NOW!'

I couldn't understand language, everything was just sounds at this point. I didn't know what language was so I was unable to follow the pig's instructions. Then I felt a stab and my body seize. It was the most painful thing I have ever felt, and I can't imagine anything worse. They had shot me with a taser. Two darts stuck in me, blasting me to the ground in a silenced, choking agony.

The paramedics came and treated me on the scene (now in my neighbor's yard) with saline for my eyes and a bandage for my hands, which were badly beaten. They gave me an examination of blood pressure and heart rate, then said I was OK to be put into police custody. Apparently they repeatedly asked me what I had taken and finally I had answered 'shrooms'.

I rather not go into detail about the jail cell because it will induce unpleasant flashbacks, as writing this has already done. I will just say it was hell, to understate it. The cops were real assholes to me. When I got to the police station they literally threw me in my jail cell and said 'You are fucked'.

I was charged with assault, public intoxication, disorderly conduct, vandalism, trespassing, and possession of a schedule IV substance (I had 5 xanax pills in my pocket). I was bailed out by a close family member who was severely dissapointed and upset with me. The bail was set at 3500$.

It was a hell of a journey to hell. I will never trip again on anything; I have lost all desire for altered states, plus I now will face jail soon and a long probation. My lawyer says he will try to negotiate a 30 day sentence but he can't promise it will be that small.

My neighbor was cool about it; well not cool but as cool as someone could be in his situation. I called him and apologized, and he told me what happened. He didn't lecture me at all about drugs or my actions. At the end of our somewhat brief conversation, he said 'good luck' and hung up.

Exp Year: 2005	ExpID: 43716

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jun 18, 2006	Views: 59,105

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Police / Customs (60), Pharms - Alprazolam (98), Pharms - Diazepam (115), 5-MeO-DMT (58), LSD (2) : Alone (16), Post Trip Problems (8), Train Wrecks &amp; Trip Disasters (7), Combinations (3)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00
		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 1:00
		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   T+ 1:00
		 2 hits
		 smoked
		 Salvia divinorum
		 (extract)

		   T+ 1:00
		 2 hits
		 smoked
		 DMT
		 (extract)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

Let me take a timid peak

Into deaths

Other kingdom

How is one suppose to describe the indescribable?  There is truly no way I could ever account to anyone what truly happened.  I myself cant quite come to terms with the heights I reached that night.  but ill try, ill try my damn harderst.

I’ve done drugs before.  I am very experienced with acid, enjoy shrooms and DMT, and have used Salvia on a number of special occasions.  I found that even though DMT is amazingly intense and powerful, I can still keep some perspective of what is happening.  even in a full blown DMT hyperspace journey I find that there is some nerve in my mind still connected to reality. This does not apply to salvia.  I have lost myself in salvia before, an experience I am both eager to do again and yet I am terrified beyond all belief at the sheer intensity of the experience.

I have done a LSD and DMT mix before, to profound and utterly mind blowing results.  and on one other occasion I smoked both Salvia and DMT together.  It was tricky at first.  I had to have enough salvia on top of the DMT crystals in order to protect them from the open flame.  I think deep but narrow bowls work best for this. The heat of the flame will vaporize the DMT while burning w/e is on the surface.

Anyhow I stared things off by coming to the realization that I wanted to go somewhere I doubt many people go.  What would happen to one if they unleashed the three most powerful psychedelics known to man on their own mind.  Would they snap?  Self destruction would be a likely possibility.

Anywho I put my fears away and embraced this as some sort of spiritual orgasm in which I will ride all the way to the almighty peak and back.  First things first, I needed the acid, lots of it.  Then I needed some DMT, an easy thing to do in California at 5 forty 4 on a warm Saturday midway into the summer.  But salvia was tricky.  Odd, seeing that it was the only legal substance in the list, and I couldn’t find any, a number of websites wouldn’t ship to California, and the only too known headshops weren’t equipped with the drug. Anyhow I ran into a 'sub'friend who had a gram of salvia 15x.  very potent.

I arranged for a good friend to sit with me.  He would remain somewhat sober, avoiding the acid and sticking to good marijuana.

I think ill skip all the preparations.  all that’s necessary is I had a pre made and specially arranged mix of salvia and DMT already prepared for me and already packed in a bowl (in a bong).  I thought I could probably get a good two rips before I was completely twisted.

The acid was medium in strength, and after one hour of riding out one hit I decided that if I was to do things they must be done right.  So I dropped another blotter.  That did the trick.  The waves and spider web thoughts were intense, the patterns and visuals were of profound beauty: it was time.

We were in my room of my apartment, a warm comfortable place.  I propped myself up on my couch and my bud held the bong and lighter for me.  I positioned it and held the carb shut.  I gave him the signal and he began to light the mix as I took my first rip.  it was long, and I held it for a good fifteen seconds.  As I exhaled I could slowly feel the rushing sensation of the DMT pronounce itself at the same time the odd 'salvia gravity' sensation became noticeable.  I knew that in order for me to break through I needed to take a monster rip, and I needed to hold it.  So that’s what I did.  I dragged that fucker for the longest time, advising my friend to hold the lighter a little further away from the mix so that the flame wouldn’t touch the DMT crystals arranged at the bottom of the bowl.  the salvia extract started making funny sounds as it burned.

As I held my breath a loud whining sound soon enveloped me.  I never exhaled.  My friend said that I closed my eyes and entered a trance as I fell back onto the couch.  Good thing he was there or I would of dropped the bong.

                   let us peak

                   into deaths

                   other dream kingdom

    'and alice followed the rabbit down into the rabbit whole..'

          jjjjjjjjjjjkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk jjjjjjjjj kkkkkkkkkk

*&amp;*&amp;^&amp;**&amp;^^*&amp;

            ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?CC

and that is C minus four

                  z?

no

                  D?

no

                  8?

yes.

       eight what?

bannas

                    what was happening?

it took me a while to figure out what I was seeing.

I still cant quite say.

some say it was a mass of needles

I was looking for the hay

        the needles all smiled

weren’t that bad in the end

I was stuck without reality

    the goose without his friend

I was peaking over from the edge of some great peak of (mountains?  Or was it the warted body of some massive toad..) Something, looking at what seemed to be a pulsating valley.  Take the intensity of an acid pattern, the rushing sensation and fucking amazing breakthrough high of DMT, and add salt, pepper, stir, and yes, add some salvia.  I wasn’t sure of what I was seeing.  I wasn’t sure what it was.

It was a valley, incredibly real, yet it seemed to spiral out in front of me like some, well, big spiral.  The valley walls stayed still but the matter of which they were made of seemed to be sliding and melting.  as I stared at the valley I saw it elongate and slowly I took off.  Was I peaking?  wasn’t I already at the peak?  Holy fucking Christ if this isn’t the peak then where the fuck am I going?

Idk where I went.  The valley lost all shape and form and simply became something else.  it was some sort of warped tube at which I was traveling down at amazing speeds, invincible to all aspects or forces of nature.  Suddenly, I know because before it happened I could feel that I was about to take a step to places no one had been to, suddenly I detached.  The best way to describe it is that what I thought was the peak was magnified ten fold, and I lost it.  The trip itself became the reality at which I was judging the current reality on.  Normal wasn’t what I was when I was baseline, normal was now defined as the first thirty seconds of the trip.  What I had just entered was a place beyond time.

The spiral went white, and what I saw was a white space.  Sort of like a negative shot of the space we have come to know.  What should of been glowing stars were big balls of black matter.  I think I looked down at my feet and realized that this whiteness was infinite.  Spaced fairly evenly throughout this white space were the big balls.  At first they seemed alien, then they became somewhat more placid, a little crispy, too much pepper, then suddenly all the balls exploded in vibrant colors and once again I was rushing.  The DMT was coming in hard, what had taken it so long?  Hot fucking Christ almighty I still hadn’t peaked.  Never had one minute seemed so incredibly fucking long.  slowly the white place melted into blackness and I was indeed space.  The stars were indeed stars.

Then I blacked out.  I can’t remember anything clearly after that, too intense.

What I can remember was one thing.  At some point I was very high in space, I was 'close' to the edge of space.  If I was to reach out with my arm I would exit space and enter the beyond. It was then I saw the great machine, the interworkings of the universe.  It was literally a great machine.  I had turned away from the edge of space and was looking down at everything, and hot damn it was a machine of which the knobs and levers on it were of sizes unheard of.  I don’t know why this single image of the peak has stayed with me while most of everything else has simply faded into one astonished wow.

It was like my mind took one desperate snap shot of the single highest point during the trip, and that is all I have to hold onto, the last fragments of something so amazing.  there is really no way I could describe the feeling that I was part of that machine, yet even though I already new that my part to play in the machines workings was planned out, I could see that I didn’t have to follow those rules.  What would happen if I strayed?  Chaos.

The very last memory of the peak I have is of looking at the machine and realizing that it was breathing, then, well, I don’t quite know.  Perhaps the peak continue to grow, perhaps I entered the beyond.  What happened still clouds me, two days after the experience.  Perhaps a few hours of meditating will bring back what happened.

All I know is that when I opened my eyes and saw a mass of pink pixels staring at me I was amazed that it seemed so ordinary.  As I came back to acid baseline I swore that this was real and that I am finally normal.  That’s how high I was folks, so high that when I came off the DMT/Salvia mix the acid seemed mundane.  I was amazed.

I then began to go dance in an effort to try to explain to my friend what happened.  After that I simply sat down and enjoyed the acid as it did odd things with my carpet.  Idk if it was some lingering side effect of the previously consumed combo, but I could swear that all the patterns I was seeing afterwards were somehow magnified and intensified.  Even two hours after I had blazed and was slowly coming off the acid I could swear that the patterns and visuals were more 'real' than they should of been.  Didn’t bother me though, it gave me a feeling that I had been left with something from that experience

I don’t think ill ever understand what happened there is no way I could really describe the utter horror/fear/amazement/aw at what happened. I think the best way to put it is that I had sex with my mind.  My mind took me and completely fucked the shit out of me.  She threw me on some invisible bed and for 8 minutes we fucked harder than any animal.  Sick yes, seeing that I was technically fucking myself, but it was incredible.  Will I ever do it again?  yes, I probably will.  it was so amazing that I think I will prob have to live it again.  Perhaps ill push it a little further, up the dosages a little more, go into the beyond...

I will be honest, the entire time I was twisted on the three drugs at the same time I had an intense fear that I had finally taken my mind on a ride that I couldn’t afford.  But fuck, why do people ride roller coasters anyways?

Exp Year: 2005	ExpID: 44002

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jun 18, 2006	Views: 69,418

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LSD (2), Salvia divinorum (44), DMT (18) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Combinations (3)


		 DOSE:

		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 2.0 g
		 oral
		 Mushrooms
		 (dried)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   150 lb

While this was not technically my first acid trip (I had tried a single square of the same print months prior with some minor psychological effect, but no visuals) this would be the one that I remembered clearer than anything else.

A lot of this trip stems from ideas presented in the movie The Matrix. While I wish my life changing experience hadn’t been based off a Hollywood blockbuster, the associations made are fine by me.

To establish this trip, I will provide a summarization of some events in my life which I feel shaped the trip. I had begun my first year at university, a feat that took me an extra year of high school and some substantial money saving. It was in November that this event happened, and at that point in time, I was incredibly depressed. I had been dealing with the idea of whether or not to break up with my girlfriend at the time, as I had been cheating on her, and felt terrible about it. The girl I was cheating on her with was, at the time, nothing more than a booty call whom I really showed little appreciation towards. On top of this, my financial situation was horrendous, as I had managed to blow through thousands of dollars on alcohol alone. My life was in a downwards spiral, a testament to the very notion of excessive living.

A few friends had been searching for mushrooms, which thankfully, I had a reasonable quantity at the time. They were to be doing them for the first time. Initially, my roommate John and I had planned to do acid I had purchased earlier on in the year, but he decided against it at the last minute, opting for the mushrooms instead. I believe it was around 7 when I dropped the 2 tabs left, and I also ate 2 grams of dried mushrooms. The potency of these mushrooms were very high, as 1.5 grams had given trips for the full 4 hour range before dying off. Initially, not a whole lot was happening. We sat in our room watching visualizations thanks to milkdrop in winamp, listening to some QOTSA and Nas before finally deciding to go smoke a joint. It was after this joint that the effects began to present themself.

I have always been a fan of science fiction, a technophile of sorts, and it was upon entering the darkened residence, with a foamy green carpet and white walls that the effects began to make themselves known. I reached towards the door handle, and suddenly the green carpet began to present itself entirely in the matrix code. My hand sliced through the falling text, rippling waves cutting through the very fabric of reality. I remarked to my roommate that I felt as though 'I was falling out of phase with reality.' It was after this initial hallucination that we went to play Halo 2. The guys fired up Ivory Tower and hit the lights. Sitting roughly 3 feet away from a 27 inch tv, the graphical prowess of the Xbox made itself known. It felt as though I was plugged in to the character on the screen, although I was not playing. Somewhere in my head, I could feel the visual stimulus being converted into raw neural inputs.

My eyes began to stare into the television, captivated by the thought of direct neural interfacing, feeling as though Microsoft was on the verge of something huge (this would later lead to some scary schizophrenic conspiracy theories.). I was handed the controller, and initially I tried moving around, but found myself unable to process the motor control skills necessary to play at the time. Earlier on while playing, my friends began to use very specific jargon relating to the game, and the nature of one of my friend's voices (it's a baritone, very resonating and official sounding) made it seem as though they were in some form of military intelligence and the like.

When I searched through my mind, I find myself able to communicate with them, without saying a word. I was able to channel myself into a telepathic state of mind, transmitting words wirelessly and carrying on a full conversation. This, of course, was not real, but at the time felt so. I felt like I was on the verge of uncovering a huge conspiracy, one that revolved entirely around the movie the matrix (damn Hollywood.) It felt as though I was hacking the neural inputs placed down the vertebrae, I was accessing things I wasn't supposed to. My friends played dual roles in this, in one hand, they were experienced hackers, waiting to show me how to do this properly. On the other hand, they were agents, forcing me to stay away from this phenomenon, distracting me (it turns out they were distracting me, because they could tell I was going insane). It was at this point in time, that we decided halo was simply too intense.

We returned to my room, watched a few more songs and proceeded to pack up the hookah and go outside. During the hookah session, I felt myself converging on something huge, an impeding invasion of sentinels. I justified to myself that they were just signs that the controlling forces were onto me, showing me that they knew what I was up to. I began to experience delusional paranoia, worrying about the information that only I had inside of my head somehow being known. Being in a capital city at the time, the sounds of the night were mostly helicopters and sirens, which only aided to my feelings of paranoia. I decided at the time, I could not trust my friends at this point until I was able to actively sort everything out. Especially when I felt as though they were talking to me inside of my head.

I returned to my room with my roommate. I believe the feelings I was about to experience stemmed from a line by nas which stated “I never sleep, cause sleep is the cousin of death.” I should also note that throughout the night it seemed as though the controlling forces (the machines from the matrix) wanted me to die. And now, I was there, in my room, feeling the incredible urge to sleep (I am thankful I tried, even though I realize the futility in sleeping while on psychedelic drugs.) I stripped myself down to my underwear, as my roommate was present, and climbed into bed. It was there that I pulled myself into a vessel, sheets wrapped tightly around me and eyes closed tightly.

Suddenly I was there, in the tanks were bodies were kept (in the matrix). I could feel the fluids surrounding me, the ebb and flow of warmth. I could feel the dermal implants imbedded along my spine, the sharp pain of needles. Suddenly a cold feeling washed over me, the warm fluid began to drain, and I could feel my life slipping away through my spine. I knew that I was dying, and at this point in time, I began to reflect on my life. I can not describe adequately the infinite sadness that I felt, the regret that I had for my previous actions in life. My thoughts went to friends and family, to the girl I was currently cheating on my girlfriend with. I could see her face, I could feel the pain that I had caused her, and I knew that I wanted to tell her that I was sorry, that I had never truly intended for her to feel that way. I had so much regret, but I was coming to terms with it. I wanted to die being at peace with myself. And as I grew colder, I found myself free of the limits I had put on myself, I was one with everything. My death occurred, and no longer was I bound to the earth by my body.

I was able to transcend every psychological barrier I had put in place so I wouldn’t have to deal with problems stemming from my life. I destroyed them, I asserted them so fully that by the time I was no longer dying, I felt as though my entire life had changed for the better. At this point in time, I spoke to my roommate. He acted in analog to the oracle of the matrix, I felt he possessed such a full understanding of things. Once I was able to piece together the notion of the matrix, I began to come to terms with the system in which we were placed. The consumer fed machine that leaves nothing in it’s wake. I understood the role of the machine; it was not to harm us, but to protect those who were not equipped to deal with the fact that we were controlled. The corporate entity provided our daily lives with a meaning, as shallow as it may have been that the majority were content with. The sheep were well tended, as they should be.

At this point in time, the nature of our existence was clear. I will not go on explaining that idea, as I can’t readily verbalize how I felt.

We went on a walk, to a rural area. In my head, I felt as though I was able to contact the ones that had been talking to me before, so I sent them a few messages, letting them know that I was not an enemy of the system, and that I would aid them if it meant happiness for those controlled. The walk was rather uneventful, but it did provide me with a beautiful memory of staring over the city with the full moon hanging over it.

When I returned to residence, at this point in time it was near 3 or 4 in the morning, I searched out the girl whom I wanted to see so badly one last time while my life slipped away. I wanted to talk to her. We talked, we talked until my jaw fell off, in an intimate position afforded to me thanks to a rather ergonomic chair. It was not sexual at this point in time, but our bodies pressed together and I felt a great understanding for her. No longer did my feelings for her seem base and empty, she had become a fully developed person. A person that I felt strong feelings towards. Part of me wanted to voice those feelings, but I knew the credibility of my words at that point in time were undermined. By the time we finished talking, it was 8 in the morning. We had talked for 5 hours, straight communication. She went to bed, and I followed.

I didn’t sleep, instead I watched her, I reflected on everything she said. I ran my fingers through her hair. My trip was coming down at this point in time, but I still was having minor visuals that I was playing with (I managed to figure out how to focus my iris so that I could look at images that were normally blurry. Specifically, the fabric of the pillow I was pressed against.) When she did wake up, after a solid 4 hours of voyeurism on my part, we made love.

It may be an odd notion to those reading this, but it was the first time in my life that I have ever felt so close to anyone. We spooned, and our bodies pressed together. I could feel her fully, and our bodies moved in such a rhythmic fashion, that I would later comment that it felt like an orchestra. I could, in my head atleast, see myself sliding into her, I could see us joined together in an internal view. She was beautiful, the definition of perfection. We had become one, a perfect union of soul and body. The sex that night was the best of my entire life, and my orgasm left me feeling completely drained, in every sense of the word.

I decided after that night, that I would never push the boundaries of my own existence so far, not for a while. Acid is an incredible drug, and this recollection does not fully illustrate the negative feelings of being nearly schizophrenic and delusional. At times, I felt as though I would end up a conspiracy theorist, forced to live on the streets on a cardboard box.

In case you are wondering about the girl, it has been only a month, but I feel as though I have met someone who is my equal in everyway. It is the first time that I have felt so close to someone. It is the first time I have ever been in love. All it took to realize how I felt about her was for me to die.

Exp Year: 2005	ExpID: 49064

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jun 19, 2006	Views: 12,856

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LSD (2), Mushrooms (39) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Sex Discussion (14), Glowing Experiences (4), Combinations (3)


		 DOSE:

		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		   repeated
		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   140 lb

I’ve done my fair share of drugs over the past two years. After experimenting with drugs like DXM and mushrooms, I began to get curious as to what other hallucinogenic drugs there might be. I’ve done vast amounts of cocaine, molly, and an E-pill cut with Special K.  A friend of mine brought up the subject of acid some time ago, and it had been something of a light switch I flicked whenever I entered that particular room from the night he mentioned it and a certain music festival to which we were planning to attend. I consider it an answer to whether the chicken or the egg came first. We spoke of acid for a good chunk of the three-hour ride, as he felt confident we would find some that day. We parked the car and found a sheet of acid within 10 minutes. We were told that it was going to make us trip “for fourteen hours, like it should.” I admit I was slightly skeptical, but I have been told that the experience is never what some expect it to be. (Keeping myself from ever hearing or reading what it had been in the eyes of others made that rather easy.) What I did not hear, however, was that it was Fluff family acid.

It has been more or less confirmed that it was not in truth from the Fluffs. Clearly some entity was watching over me that day. We each immediately took a single hit and retreated back to my car to blaze a few bowls. I believe that it was somewhere between 1:30 and 1:45 that afternoon that we dropped. We proceeded into the concert grounds at around 2:30. The concert was being held in a park spanning 666 acres of land, though we were restricted to only around twenty, with three stages. The two main stages were set up on the east and west sides so we could watch the sun rise and set against each stage with the passing of the day. We began to wander through the tents, and smack in the middle of them stood a single monolithic tent. I had just begun to start tripping and had left my phone in the car so inevitably I began to lose track of time, though the concept of time seems so trivial in retrospect. We wandered into the tent, and much to my amusement the entire hut was lined with framed blotter art.

We continued to wander around the festival. We had hardly eaten anything since early that morning, but neither of us could really decide if we were hungry. Our urge to continue walking dissipated almost instantaneously, and we began searching for a place to rest and blaze again. It didn’t take long to realize we didn’t have anything to smoke with, or to smoke for that matter. We decided to lay down in one of the few shady spots on the grass, behind the tents and near a small lake. The music was loud, and coming from two directions as we were a median between the sunstages. I had been keeping rather quiet and was becoming incredibly introspective.

I had been quietly observing each and every one of the people there as individuals, and suddenly that concept vanished and they became one living seething mass of energy. As they danced and went about their own ways, each one’s soul seemed to pass directly through the other’s. My friend and I looked over at each other, and knew exactly what we needed to do. We both rose from our crushed cloven patch of ground and began to walk. This was the first of many times that I felt that our souls crossed. It seemed to me that there was no other reasonable explanation for these curious episodes. I felt that this was how people should be communicating, that if the rest of the world could just understand each other as this group of people moving before me.

I felt unusually refreshed standing up after having been seated for any given amount of time, as if I was able to drink upon the energy of the earth like some twisted form of a vampire. It wasn’t so much that we were tired from walking as much as we grew equally tired from either one after a particular amount of time. We forded our souls across the river before us until we reached the northern shore. Here we found a barren and frigid land, inhabited by natives in the form of concrete, security guards, a long row of tightly packed food vendors, and portable toilets. We had not decided that it was time to get food just yet, and we were wary of the unusual amount of guards posted here on these shores.

We decided that it was time to smoke, but first we needed a bowl. As we gradually descended into the mass of people, I felt the need to turn my eyes skyward. Jutting above the tents and people was a flag adorned with a brilliant red and gold design. As soon as the beacon seemed as though it was ethereally connected to something in a place I could not entirely grasp the concept of, it appeared to be struggling to stay afloat this close to the northern shore. I noticed more across the tops of the island tents and began to feel as though this was sanctuary, a sort of “home base.”

My friend bought a bowl, and we decided to smoke at a picnic table in the far southwestern corner near the lake and the sunset stage. The music felt as though it had always been there, like it was just as much a part of nature as myself, and the river of souls in front of us. We smoked our bowl and had a short conversation about the band that was playing. After that we decided to make another visit to the artery of earth we had been drinking from earlier. We arrived, and I lay down on my back. This was the first time that I had really truly concentrated on the sky. The sun was just far enough on its course to make staring at the sky pleasing to my eyes. The sky before me was rent open as easily as rice paper but as peacefully as a monk engrossed in calligraphy.

What happened next will forever be a part of who I am now. It is something that gives definition to one of the shards of experience that comprises the mirror I look into within myself. I still find it difficult to adequately express what was in that moment, though I shall make an attempt nonetheless.

The world of my peripheral vision was suddenly whisked away and I felt as though I had been absorbed into this rift that had appeared before me. I was ensconced into the sky, my elevation interrupted only by a lone soaring crow, and even the time and space behind him appeared as though it was being slowed by the rift. I was suddenly held hostage by an alluring pair of eyes, made only of color and light, peering out from their hiding place in the abyss. A pair of hands gripped the edge of the rift from whatever world was beyond, and a somewhat human form began to descend upon me. As the color and light began to transfigure into more visible form, I realized that it had a woman’s figure. She was composed of the purest energy from her waist down, which was extending like a snake back into its lair.

Although what I was witnessing had left me at a total loss of both word and thought, the energy that this woman was showing me lit a fire in my mind. “You were the one watching me earlier,” I felt. We continued to move closer to one another as if she and I were a star collapsing into its self. Suddenly she was with me, and I could feel the wave of pure energy moving up my left side. The goddess was sliding up the left side of my abdomen and around to the top of my back. I could sense her eyes above, watching me, as I felt her hand touch my face.

And just like that, she was gone. It felt like seeing the end of a fairy tale, which made me feel almost as if I was just a child, though I was well a

ware that I would not have been measured as such by today’s standards. All children are told fairy tales, then one day that all stops. But the tale never disappears, it is only hidden deeper and deeper inside us as we grow older.

Instinctively I knew that I had just crested the peak of my trip. My friend and I once again looked at each other and began to swim the river again. Throughout the rest of my trip, I was able to see this goddess in everything around me. For that matter, the remainder of the trip felt almost mundane compared to what I had just experienced. I began to feel trapped inside this park with the music, seeing the same things and people over and over. Were it not for the music I might have sought my escape. We stayed until around 8:30 that evening, then left with a fairy tale safely tucked away behind the mirror.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 49904

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jul 14, 2006	Views: 7,308

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LSD (2) : Festival / Lg. Crowd (24), First Times (2)


		 DOSE:

		 1 hit
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   135 lb

A friend and I hopped our bikes, dropped a trip each; he had one of those miscellaneous trips we get with a coctail of unknown substances, normally speed or pseudoephedrine -based, I had a clean acid tab.  We'd been waiting to drop together for some months.  We didn't have a chance to utilize the mushroom season to its full potential back in August, so it has been a good year since we've had a good trip together.  So the anticipation was high, and our minds were open for the reception of whatever was to come.

We rode along walking trails that follow a creek for some kilometers.  It was after dark, park lights were spotting havens for rest...not that we needed it, and the spirit descended as the peddling pumped the blood carrying chemical catalysts through the body's gnostic antenna, the nervous system.

It was a moderate dose affair that proved strangely enough to have dramatic psychological ramifications, and which brought back the usual torrent of profound insights, which I haven’t experienced to such depth since I gave up weed not long ago.

I was surprised at the lack of body-heaviness on this occasion and this is my reasoning for calling it a lower dose, coupled with the fact that patterned visuals (open or closed eye) were mostly absent.  In fact I was full of energy. I felt like I could ride my bike at any speed for any distance without feeling any tiredness or lethargy.  While I was riding I said to my friend “I’m gonna feel this in the morning.”  Surprisingly, I didn’t.

Perceptual enhancement was exceptional from the kick off; bright, vivid, multidimensional colours made brilliant halos around street and park lights.  My body and the entire environment surrounding me seemed to buzz with energy as if I was perceiving the various vibration levels inherent in the subatomic particles of different types of matter: the creek seemed to vibrate like a trillion dominoes cascading in every direction at once, the purest perception of fluidity I’ve ever experienced, whereas the vibrations of tree trunks were stifled and muffled by the density of their wood; and every type of matter in between had its own distinct level of subatomic vibration that determined whether it was hard, soft, fluid or gas.

The times I stopped to take a breather from riding I would meditate (open-eyed) so that a full psychedelic trance would engulf my consciousness, and these were the richest moments of psychological/spiritual/mystical revelation and perceptual enhancement.  (The following is an aggregate description of the 3 or 4 times we stopped).

Sitting, staring blankly ahead, removing any intentional thought from my mind, I began to receive the bombardment of information that almost always accompanies these states of mind.  At first I noticed that I could actually watch beams of light being emitted from the park lights, and I could follow their propagation through space without moving my eyes or head, using the eye of my awareness alone.  It seemed like my entire Being had ‘slowed down’ to such a degree that for once my mind had the time and space to actually process the speed of light.  Of course I could be delusional.  Or just tripping.  Whatever the case, it confirmed to me, in ways I know not how, the simultaneity of the reality of physical science and the validity of subjective human perception: and this realization opened the flood gates.

Everything I saw from this point on took on qualities and expressions of life and mystical symbolism.  Everything was living, moving, growing, changing, and displaying deeper meanings than surface appearances.

I realized that plants are a manifestation of things totally unseen.  A healthy plant is just an indicator of the ‘right’ soil, the ‘right’ climate, the ‘right’ location, the ‘right’ neighbouring plants and animals: this goes for any living thing, plants, animals, humans, even atoms, molecules, stars, planets and galaxies: we are all expressions of the things that surround us and have surrounded us since we came to life, the things that we consume and interact with, physically and psychologically.  The miracle of a living entity is that it is not an autonomous entity at all: a tree is merely the representation, a sign or symbol indicating that a whole range of seemingly unrelated factors and conditions have coincided in the same place at the same time.  Nothing stands alone – all is one – and the one displays the all.

One cannot judge the meaning of human life on Earth without understanding the ups and downs of our history, because we must know who we are in relation to each other.  And one cannot understand the meaning of human life in this place without understanding the cosmological history of the Universe, because for this we must know who we are in relation to this Universe, and what we can offer it.  The same is said of animals and plants in the environment: I cannot explain what this or that animal is without including information on where it lives, what it eats, how it survives, and even what animals preceded it in evolution.

One cannot judge a person without understanding where they have been, what they have done, who they relate to, how they see things, and why, as well as what they want to offer the world.  Every thing in existence is the expression of its environment, which means that literally everything is interrelated, and no thing can be separated from another, the Universe is a single entity, one whole organism; and we do have a role that exceeds the  meaninglessness inherent in the evolutionary 'fluke of partial chaos': we are an organ of the Universal body.

People forget that we are part of the Universe: there is no separation.  We are made of the same stuff; we exist with the Universe and interact with it at the same time that it interacts with us: we are the Universe, just like that rock, or my bike, or our solar system.  We are not ‘in’ the universe, we are this universe.  Everything is this universe.  Consequently, what people rarely realize is that when we speak, the Universe Speaks.  When a person speaks we say they are speaking because meaning-encoded sounds are coming from a part of their body.  Our bodies are just as much part of the universe as rocks and bikes and stars, so that when we speak, meaning-encoded sounds are coming from a part of the body of the Universe.  Therefore we represent the speech – and the thought and the emotion and the action – of the Universe.  Of course there may be other races of beings who are contributing to this voice, but that doesn’t reduce the fact that intelligent human life is the brains of the Universe.

During the whole experience my friend and I were on a similar ‘level’.  We always knew where each other were, mentally speaking.  We both spoke few words but somehow communicated a great deal.  I guess gestures and facial expressions helped a lot, but at times there did seem to be a kind of mutual understanding which we laughed at a couple of times in amazement.  At least I was amazed.  Though there is always the sceptical thought that maybe we’re thinking totally different things and we’re both just tripping, but generally actions or subsequent ‘conversations’ confirmed that we were both very aware of each others state of mind.  I should note that this mutual understanding related to our level of intoxication, and also how our personalities work, so to speak, not so much in terms of insights or gnostic information.  It reminded me of when I first started smoking weed with my mate Rick.  After we’d both finished our first bowl, Rick would always ask with a laugh, “you stoned yet man?”  And it always helped get us in the same frame of mind.

All in all it was a deep thinking, high energy experience that was very smooth and containable.  The next morning I was physically a little groggy, but no more than a usual late night.  I was mentally alert and in a glowing mood after the grogginess went, and four days later I am still high, feeding off the infinite insights opened to me by a chemical relative of Gaia’s most profound gifts.

Exp Year: 2004	ExpID: 30570

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Jun 20, 2006	Views: 5,650

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LSD (2) : Glowing Experiences (4), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 150 ug
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 0.2 g
		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   60 kg

I was prompted to submit this report after reading of an experience which seemed similar in some respects, pertaining to the fractal patterns.

I had obtained a tab of LSD from a friend of a flatmate, and I was able to choose from which part of the sheet my tab would be cut.

The picture printed on the sheet was of a Dali painting, 'Torero Alucinogeno', or 'Hallucinogenic Bullfighters', and the sheet seemed to have been unevenly scored, so that a lot of the squares were of an uneven size. Thus I chose one of the largest available squares, which happened to coincide with the part of the picture where a uniform field of flies disappears into perspective. This was the first time I had taken LSD from this batch, although I had taken acid from other manufacturers on 6 other occasions.

I should note that I had been smoking hydroponic skunk fairly regularly (1g per day average), and I could feel the effects of the various cannabinoids near constantly, although I had not smoked that day.

I put the tab under my tongue, and sat on the front porch of my flat, talking with two other flatmates for about 20 minutes, until I decided I would like to go for a skate. I'm careful to avoid planning out a night using psychedelics, I like to be free to follow ideas as they come to me. I retrieved my camera bag (I've found that it's best to keep things like keys, change, stash, lighter etc all together, and my ABC is to Always Bear a Camera!) and skateboard and skated off down the road.

I found immediately that my balance was slightly better than normal, and I could adjust my weight distribution very exactly, close enough to almost ride on the back two wheels (a manual). This may not sound amazing, but I skate only for travel and adrenaline, and I skate very basically, one foot on the board all the time, and the other pushes now and again. I enjoyed the ride until I got into the inner city, and the smell of cars became stronger. There were drifts of fast food wrappers everywhere, and I knew that I had to keep moving and get past the city centre, as I felt rising disgust at the drunken hordes, shambling animals looking for food/a fight/a root. Each to their own, I thought as I dodged a drifting Coke cup.

I threw my skateboard over the Botanic Gardens fence, and immediately regretted making so much noise. I jumped the fence and wandered slowly towards the trees, marvelling at their size and complexity, and the strength of their frames.

I began to notice more and more hallucinations very soon, some of the trees appeared to me as groups of bearded dog-like creatures, leaning down towards me. I found concrete to be too harsh on my bare feet (I had stashed my skateboard and shoes safely, as I had done in the past) and I moved from the path to the grass of the archery lawn. As I walked between the two rows of tall trees I felt coldness lapping at my feet, and I became convinced that I was walking in two inches of water. I looked at my feet for a minute, and they seemed to be covered in darkness up to the ankles. I had to put my hands down into the shadow to realise that it was only shadow, not water.

I kept moving through the gardens, without direction, idly observing the forms and hallucinations, until I realised that I hadn't had a drink all day, and I was becoming somewhat dehydrated. I started searching in vain for a drinking fountain, slowly getting more and more agitated when one wasn't right around the corner. I felt worried, as some part of me knew that there were at least six drinking fountains spread throughout this half of the gardens (which span about 10 acres), and yet I couldn't find one!

I began to feel despair, and sat down. Then I noticed a light far away, and felt compelled to walk towards it. It was very dark, but I could see better as I walked onwards, until I started to recognise parts of the gardens I had been through earlier. I skirted the archery lawn and continued towards the light.

I stopped some distance from the light, and looked around. As my eyes adjusted and chased away the retinal ghosting I realised that I could hear water running . . . I looked to my right and saw a drinking fountain, continually running. Christchurch is built on a series of artesian wells, and if you dig and hit a spring the cleanest water in the world flows continually out.

I knelt down by the stone fountain and drank deeply.

From there I moved to a small hill in the centre of a ring of very tall pine trees, and lay between a two large oblong plates set in the ground, one white, one black. I took off my bag and prepared a small pipe of weed. As I smoked it I felt a bubble expanding in my lungs, pressing upon my throat, sliding into my head.

The bubble grew, spreading through my limbs, and slowly through my brain. It seemed to stop, completely filling me with gentle pressure, until I felt what seemed like a drop of water on the very top of my head. It was almost like there was suddenly a hole on my 7th chakra, and what had just filled my body was flowing out, running over my skin, spreading to envelope the grass, trees and bushes until it was an even field which was still a part of me.

I lay back, and watched the stars slowly circle and the trees sway. After a time it seemed as though the trees were fractal generations, a single line splitting and multiplying until it merges with the air, taking air and water and spreading to continue the formula. The stars also seemed to be carefully arranged in patterns spelling out the flow of gravity and expansion. I was still hallucinating myriad faces in the clouds, and they started to become larger and talk more actively, smiling and communicating with each other, although I was unclear as to what they were saying. They seemed to merge until there was just one face, as large as one a few feet away from me. She (I'm very sure that the face was feminine) laughed once, before I looked too closely in wonder and the clouds were clouds again.

Many other visions came to me during that time, many of which I can't recount with language written or spoken. However, one thing that really stood out was a the feeling that light was hitting me with energy that I could perceive as groups of particles. I could see the grain of light, except on sources of light or direct reflections where it blended into the image. I felt at the time that this was more than a visual illusion, as I know that the human eye is sensitive enough to register single photons.

Particles moving in waves, the theory actually meant something!

My photography has since come a long way, I can now explore optical oddities and tools with a greater understanding of the underlying physics. This experience and the mental exploration over the next few days gave me insight into things I would otherwise have never found. I'm now studying for a degree in Physics, and I hope to follow on with String theory study.

Exp Year: 2002	ExpID: 31388

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Aug 16, 2006	Views: 6,009

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LSD (2), Cannabis (1) : Entities / Beings (37), General (1), Alone (16)


		 DOSE:

		 4 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (liquid)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   190 lb

There are moments in my life, where I remember myself as the person before, and the person after an experience, I had one of those moments one evening late in the summer of 1996.

Myself and a group of friends had gathered at a buddy's house, his folks were at their summer home and we used to have get togethers there to party, have bonfires, and listen to music... it was always a good time.  But this one night has stuck with me, I remember it as if it had happened yesterday, the vivid image burned into my memory.

My friends and I had come across a vial of liquid LSD.  We had done it many times before, see colors move and wave, things seem more alive, make cigarette trails and circles but never in my life have I had an experience like I had that night.  I tear up even retelling this story in print, not because anything horrible actually happened that night, but I, still to this day, feel that I was given some insight from God, as to what's to come.

We had dropped the acid at about 8:00 pm, they were on the large sweet-tart rolls that have the dimple in them.  Each one had two doses on them, and always anxious to start the fun, we were getting disappointed after about an hour with no effect.  So after about an hour had passed, we took another.  In retrospect, I think this may have been a big mistake, because as the night progressed, I can only say I was taken to a place that living humans shouldn't visit.

To this point in my life, I was not a very spiritual person, not a religious person and had no advance knowledge of the stories of the history of the Bible, the events of the night would surely change that.  Anyways, on with the story...

More people had shown up, some that we had partied with before, some that I've never seen before in my life, it was a friendly atmosphere, and at about 10:00, I began to feel the effects of the LSD.  It began as a normal trip, things began looking not quite normal, flowing wood grain, things that I could associate with my previous experiences with this drug.

Then, my friend invited me to come up to his room to look at the fractal generator on his computer, which he referred to as 'god'.  I played along, it was neat, but he continued referring to this piece of electronic equipment as god, and as he did so, I began to have a feeling that what he was doing was VERY wrong.  After several minutes of listening to him, I stood up, and calmly said to him that 'That is not God'...

I got up and walked out of the room, and started to make my way down the stairs.  I got about halfway down, and began to feel dizzy.  I sat down on the stairs, put my head in my hands and closed my eyes.  I remember having a short conversation, like an argument, with who I could not tell you.  I said 'No, not yet' and they agreed with me, that it was not the right time.. and suddenly, I felt as if I was being pulled from my body.  Further and further back I was pulled, I could see the house and then the city, then the state... but stranger still, I was aware of all the people, things, animals, and that they were all interconnected, like a huge puzzle fitting together in perfect symmetry... and then I stopped.

I could feel a presence over my shoulder, not intimidating presence, but felt such a love from this being that I can really not begin to explain it in words.  It told me that it needed to show me something, and that it was the most important thing in the world and asked me if I was ready.  I said yes, and then all of these images began to flash through my mind, slow at first and then faster and faster, I would later realize this as images described in the Bible, from Adam and Eve, through the present time, history flashing so fast that I couldn't grasp all that I was seeing.

What I did get from it is that God is in all things, no matter how miniscule, no matter how insignificant.  I couldn't tell you how long I was there, a second, a minute, an eternity, but as quickly as it had started, it ended.  The presence then told me that I'd been shown the most important thing the world has ever known, and that I was to remember and tell as many people that I could.  The feeling that I had seen this once before was strong in me, I later likened it to what people are shown, before they are born into this world.  I remember nodding my head, and then I was told that I was going to be put back into my body, and was reminded once again to remember and pass on what I had learned.  And then 'BAM' there I was, standing outside the house on the front stoop.

Standing there with me, was another one of my friends, Wolfy, he had also dosed with us that evening.  The conversation we had was chilling to me, to say the least.

He looked at me, cocked his head, and said 'Where'd ya go?'

I said, 'Wolf, you're never going to believe what just happened to me.'  He kind of smiled and started to walk around me.  I then told him that I thought I had just met God, and started going into some of the details of the experience.

He continued to pace around me, and again, smirked at me, and said 'You know, all that stuff you were just telling me...  You don't want to remember that.  The people and the Garden..' his speech began to speed up, '...the this and that.. You don't want to remember that'  Every time he made a revolution around me, I felt as if I was forgetting a little bit more of what I'd been shown.  Then suddenly, I felt this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.  I looked at him, and said 'Oh my god Wolf... you're Satan.'  Again he smirked, winked at me, and walked into the house.

I stood outside for a bit, then myself walked into the house, most of the people at the party had wandered outside to the bonfire in the back.  I went down into the finished basement, it was empty save me and I sat there for awhile... then I had this thought, that a girl I had met earlier in the night was going to come down the stairs, and say something about 'freaking me out'... and click... the door to the basement opened up and down the stairs the footsteps came.  Sure enough, the girl walked around the corner and the first words out of her mouth were 'Hey Jeremy, I hope this doesn't freak you out but I know your ex..'

I said, 'I really don't mean to be rude, but you are freaking me out, I have to go.'  And I walked up the stairs and began to make my way to the back door of the house, see if I could find some normality with the other party goers.

Just before I opened the sliding glass door I thought... 'Wolf is going to make a comment of peeing his pants'... I opened the back door, and as I stepped out onto the porch, Wolf stood up and wiped his leg, and said 'Oh my God, I think I just peed myself.'

I was beginning to feel very afraid, a sense of impending doom began to make a knot in the pit of my stomach, like the world was going to end.  I kept looking out to the horizon for signs of a mushroom cloud or something, and I couldn't shake it.  Then one of the girls sitting around the fire walked over to me, looked at me and said 'Don't ya get it?'

I said, 'Don't I get what?'  It suddenly felt like she was making fun of me... She tapped another party goer on the shoulder and whispered something to him and giggled.  I began to sense the presence of Evil at the party very strongly.  She then looked at me again and said 'You really don't get it, huh?'  Then another person stopped next to her and repeated the same thing.. 'Jay, you don't get it?'  I had the sudden need to be far away from this place... The question began to travel through the party... 'DON'T YOU GET IT?'  I could hear it as I walked back into the house following me, and no, at the time, I can honestly say that I didn't get it...

I called my parents house, and got my Mom, I told her that I needed someone to pick me up, told her where I was and that I wasn't feeling well, I needed to be around people I knew loved me.  The question was still floating in my head... don't you get it?... I walked out the front door and was sat down next to my car.

The front door of the house opened, and my friend walked out, the one that was referring to his computer as 'god'.  He asked how I was doing and I told him that I had called for a ride.  We had some small talk and I was actually starting to feel a bit more normal.  I was thinking of calling back and canceling my ride... and then a thought came into my head and told me that if I kept partying, I would die.  I shook it off and began to get up, and all the hair on my body stood on end.  My friend looked at me, and asked what was wrong...

I said, 'Don't you see it?'

He said, 'See what...?'

I said, 'Oh my God!  Oh my God!' and began walking to the street... It had to of been in my minds eye, but I saw a fire in the sky, and pointed to it... it was growing, and growing... I dropped down to the ground and covered my head.

It passed over head with the sound of a thousand locomotives, and disappeared into the distance... At that moment, I knew that I had witnessed the end of the world.  I turned an ashen white, at that moment, a car pulled up, it was my brother and his girlfriend.  My Ma had sent them to come get me.  I left the party that night, a changed person.  I started going to church, something that since I've stopped as the church centered a lot around giving to get, and I didn't feel that was right, so now I just pray, and look to God to find the answers.

I don't really know what happened to me that night.  It wasn't like any other trip that I've ever had before, and I had always had a good experience... I still couldn't tell if what happened that night was a good experience or not, but good or ill, it did change me.  It was also the last time, that I took a hallucinogenic drug.  I realized that there are some things, that us living humans are just not meant to experience.

I pray for the world, and hope that day, that is so sharply burnt into my memory, never comes to pass...

God Bless you all...

Exp Year: 1996	ExpID: 53036

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Aug 23, 2006	Views: 5,893

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LSD (2) : Entities / Beings (37), General (1), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 3 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   180 lb

The year was 1991 and it was the end of summer vacation before my Senior year in high school.  A friend of mine in Santa Cruz had gotten a hold of some really potent LSD and invited me down.  So I took a bus from Berkeley to go finally go on a 'real' trip.

Some background first.  My friend, four years my senior, had been by neighbor since I was one year old.  He introduced me to pot and LSD.  Years of psychotherapy later I recognize him as having basically psychologically abused me through most of my childhood.  His primary methods were physical dominance and verbal derision.

Anyhow, I arrived in Santa Cruz and quickly took three tabs of 'triple dipped' flying eyeballs.  Aside from my friend there were two other roommates at the house, one a completely fried LSD lifer.  It was nighttime.

Within an hour pattern hallucinations kicked in hard and I started getting really uncomfortable.  I went for a walk with my friend and my anxiety levels started shooting through the roof.  At one point I heard a nonstop stream of muttering coming from my friend saying what a loser I am, how I am a failure, on and on and on... I told him to stop it, and he acted like he didn't know what I'm talking about.  I've no idea if it was entirely a hallucination or not.

We got back to his house and turned on some Bob Marley.  He laid down on his bed and I in my sleeping bag just next to it.  Immediately the music began to speak to me.  There was a giant bubble of energy in the music and we were both connected to it by beams of energy from our solar plexus.  I got really uncomfortable, this didn't make any sense to me!  I realized that the last thing I wanted to do was be in communion with my friend whom I actually detested!  Meanwhile good 'ol Bob was telling me 'I like it like this, I like it like this'.

It was too much for me to handle.  I looked over at David and he immediately looked at me, like why did I break the connection?  Then I saw him for what he really was, a giant rat person who had been feeding off of me for my entire life.  Overload!

I laid back into my sleeping back and tried to go to sleep. I felt a gigantic bubble of consciousness overtake my small bubble, it assimilated me into it and took over.  Suddenly I lost control of my body, my arms moved up across my chest and formed a cross like a mummy.  My skin dried up as I decayed thousands of years in a few seconds...  my sleeping bag became a sarcophagus.  I died.  Then suddenly I violently cringed into the fetal position.  I was in the cosmic egg, surrounded by infinite layers of rainbow colored shells radiating out from me.

After this things get a bit hazy.  I vaguely remember floating around the 'ether' talking with all sorts of different beings.  I specifically remember meeting a group of people seeking the meaning of life, and some sort of guide who was with me asked me if I ever wondered what the meaning of life was.

This went on for some time.  Eventually, a voice came to me and said 'don't you feel like screaming?'  'just let it out'.  And yes, I did feel like screaming...  this energy started growing in my solar plexus and I let out the loudest banshee scream humanly possible... ear shattering and throat tearing!  Once it started I couldn't stop it, I just kept screaming and screaming at the absolute top of my lungs.  Through all of this I was 99% unaware of the physical universe, I must have been so deep in my unconscious that my visual input was miniscule compared to the deep perceptions I was experiencing.

Then David, my friend, came up to me and told me that if I screamed one more time he would hit me so hard.  This of course was a suggestion for me to scream again... and he clocked me square in the jaw.  Then things got really interesting... in a bad way.

I fell... not just to the ground but into someone else’s body.  I found myself inhabiting the body of a filthy, homeless black man who was high on heroin stumbling through some urban wasteland.  This man walked down a street and eventually into a building.  Walked up a flight of stairs where some people were playing cards.  They commented on how 'fucked up that dude is'.

In my new body I proceeded down a hallway, opened a bathroom door, tripped and reached out to catch my fall.  My hand landed on a heater that scalded it, I then fell over onto a small garbage can that was full of broken glass which deeply imbedded itself in my side.  Then pain was as real as anything I had experienced in my normal life.  I lay on the floor as blood oozed out of me into a pool.  Someone opened the door behind me and it hit my head... I heard a woman's scream.

Then things changed again.  I was surrounded by a red light and some shadowy figures came around me, propped me up and told me that what they were about to do to me was for my own good.  They proceeded to break my neck, ripping my head off, kick me repeatedly, drop an anvil on my head, stab me, and basically murder me numerous times.  If that wasn't enough, it happened all over again!  Just like pressing rewind on a video tape I was the homeless guy again walking into the bathroom only to get impaled by the glass all over again.

Then the figures began murdering me over and over again.  This cycle continued about a half dozen times.  In desperation now, I had to get out of this situation.  I figured out that by moving my teeth against each other I could control the entire experience like a VCR.  I knew that if I could get my teeth to touch by a single atom that I could be rescued.  During this time I found myself inside an ambulance and eventually in a hospital bed.  I could hear the heart monitor beeping by the bedside.

After fiddling with my teeth for a while I gently woke up and found myself back in the house where the whole night started.  I noticed there were only mild pattern hallucinations remaining and only about four and a half hours had passed.

I actually soon forgot about the entire ordeal.  It wasn't until 3 weeks later when I took some mushrooms that GOD spoke to me through my solar plexus and told me that I had to return to that violent place, that it was my penance.

That was over 12 years ago and I still live with a fear of that place.  I've been in the hospital a couple of times to manage what has now become a mild psychosis.  I pretty much have permanent mild visuals all the time and a fair bit of anxiety.

I know I've felt alone for a long time...  but with love and a lot of Yoga I've been able to make at least some peace with the whole ordeal like I never thought possible.

Exp Year: 1991	ExpID: 30744

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Aug 27, 2006	Views: 9,583

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LSD (2) : Small Group (2-9) (17), HPPD / Lasting Visuals (40), Entities / Beings (37), Bad Trips (6)


		 DOSE:

		   repeated
		 oral
		 Pharms - Lithium
		 (daily)

		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD

		   repeated
		 oral
		 DXM
		 (liquid)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   125 lb

It was after finishing my exams, I was getting ready for Christmas vacation, was tired from studying but very relaxed and happy to have the chance to trip.  I had a cold, I'd been taking over the counter cough syrup (Nyquil and Dayquil) which had apparently elevated my Lithium levels (I didn't know there were certain over the counter drugs I was not supposed to take with Lithium).  I took two hits of LSD that within 5 minutes it led to grand mal seizures that put me in the ICU for 3 days.

I personally don't remember the majority of the event, I remember taking the acid, feeling like something was wrong (anxious, a helicopter like booming noise) I thought it was my first 'bad trip' but luckily I didn't isolate myself but instead quickly went to a group of friends in a nearby dorm room.  I sat back on their couch, tried to relax, things quickly swirled into unintelligible nonsense, noises sounded like the Charlie Brown teacher, and that's all I remember.

I've been told I stopped responding, fell off the couch, and starting seizing uncontrollably.  I'm not sure how long the seizures lasted but from the ambulance report I was still having them all the way to the hospital and in the ER.  I was given a spinal tap, cat scan, EKG, various drugs to stop the seizures, and admitted to the ICU where I stayed for 3 days.  I remember bits and pieces from the ICU, and bits and pieces of the week following my release from the hospital.  I had a lot of bruises, trouble walking, a very swollen chewed up tongue and was quite a mental and physical wreck for the next month, though conveniently it's not well remembered.

Within 6 weeks of the event I was mostly recovered taking classes at my college again, going to work, etc. though I was physically sore (bruises healing, hard to walk) for about 12 weeks total.  It was diagnosed as a drug overdose in the reports from LSD though I think it was more the combination of LSD and elevated Lithium levels (dehydration goes with elevated levels as well as the possible reactivity with the LSD), and fatigue that lead to the seizures.

I have now (3 years later) been cleared as perfectly fine, though I do have some voltage asymmetry on EEGs it's nothing out of the ordinary.  As the neurologist said 'I have a very healthy brain.'  A month after the seizures I stopped taking the Lithium and have not taken any kind of prescription psychologically related drug.  I am fully functional academically, socially, etc. without the use of antipsychotic drugs (Lithium).  It turns out the prescription for Lithium in the first place was a misdiagnosis and a mistake on the part of the Doctor.  Needless to say, I have not done any sort of illegal drug since that event.

Exp Year: 2000	ExpID: 31861

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Sep 1, 2006	Views: 20,979

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LSD (2), Pharms - Lithium (91) : Health Problems (27), Combinations (3), Hospital (36)


		 DOSE:

		 1.5 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

		 8 bowls
		 smoked
		 Cannabis
		 (plant material)

		 10 shots
		 oral
		 Alcohol - Hard
		 (liquid)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   103 lb

I have been a pretty big 'stoner' for about three years now. I had experienced some minor bad trips before, mostly in the form of delusional paranoia. When I first started smoking weed I always had great experiences, but after smoking heavily for an extended period of time the paranoia began to set in. I usually love the 'highs' I get from smoking weed; it makes me feel good, happy and comfortable with myself.  I love when the smoke fills up my lungs and my mind goes somewhere else.

I'm from Colombia and I have to mention that it is pretty easy to get any kind of drugs down there. I was a really pot head for about a year and half, I used to smoke every single day after breakfast, lunch and dinner. I have also tried X, shrooms, acid and a bunch of Colombian herbs. I stopped doing any kind of drugs for a while, that was when my parents found out and put me into rehab and psychiatry sessions. (Which I think messed up my head even more).

When I got to the U.S. two years ago, I told myself that I was going to try to quit drugs but this idea didn't last very long until I met my friends (all pot heads, drug dealers and psychos).

Now the worst experience I had was on June 21st, 22nd, 23rd, 2003 a month ago. It was a Saturday night when we were all partying at G's apartment.  M, E, RJ, G, me and C were tripping on acid and the others J, BB, B were just smoking.  The hardest I have ever tripped was with 3 tabs last year but this time I took 1  and I was going insane. I took the first hit of blotter paper at 9:30pm and I shared the other one with C at 11:00pm. When I shared the last half hit the first hit was already kicking in and then we started to drink some orange juice.

RJ was our drug dealer and he used to get everything from N. (RJ's 'best friend', drug dealer, depressed guy, self-employed, 23 yrs. old) I've seen N maybe 4 or 5 times, we all have partied together and I've had maybe two conversations with him. So, back to Saturday night, we were all tripping, especially RJ and E they were tripping really hard. We were all taking Wild Turkey shots and smoking like crazy. By 3:00am I was on my 10th shot.

It was maybe 3:15 am and we decided to smoke another bowl in the living room. I started to feel really paranoid and because I was tripping and smoking since early in the afternoon my face and legs started to feel numb. I closed my eyes and laid on the floor, and then I had all these funny sensations. Funny pictures, they were all in beautiful colors. Greens and reds and yellows and they looked like Picasso's pictures. Doors opened up at triangular angles and there were all these colors' an unreal world. My head was going into crazy thoughts, I wanted to cry but I couldn't. We were listening to The Doors 'I can't see your face in my mind' (my favorite band and one of the best songs) but it lasted for ever, it felt like eternity, the same song over and over (this scene now comes up to my mind like  flashbacks). I flew out of my own body and I could see myself in a way weirder than an out-of-body because I could see my body on the floor and I could see my soul floating above my body all from a different perspective.

Everything shifted into cartoon form and looked really fucked up. Everything became 2-D and flat. The part of me that was floating above my body changed form so it was in 2-D. One of its eyes became a spinning spiral while the other became a flickering eye, which shot occult symbols out (the symbols were constantly floating around the head). Then the soul's head began spinning. Finally the face stayed the same, and I realize that it was my best friend's face from Colombia and she was trying to hug me but she couldn't.

Then it became my 'soul's face' again and it jumped back into my body. After that all I could hear was Jim Morrison's voice going 'Insanity's horse adorns the sky, can't seem to find the right lie, carnival dogs consume the lines, can't see your face in my mind' over and over and over'I stood up and went to G's room and laid on the couch while G, C, E, M, D and RJ laid on the bed.

Suddenly the door opened and it was N, he was crying, nervous and shaking. He went to the room were we all were talking and laughing at ourselves. He slammed the door and started to freak out. 'I can't deal with this anymore, I can't handle this, I'm going nuts, my head it's all fucked up' etc This is when my trip turned absolutely crazy. I was in the couch and I was upside down, my feet were on the wall and my head was sort of tilted. I felt my eyes coming out of my face, I moved and then I sat normally. N started to yell at RJ 'you got to get up, you have to help me with this they went to the bathroom but the door was open so we all saw what was happening in the bathroom. N took a huge ass bag out of his pants, it was full of everything, little plastic bags full of weed, crack, pills it had everything and he gave it to RJ. 'Sell this for me; you're going to have to call a bunch of customers.' and he gave him the bag and a phonebook.

They got out of the bathroom and RJ was freaking out, N took out a gun and started to pointed at himself, he was crying 'I can't do this anymore, I'm way too fucked up, I want to die' RJ didn't know what to do and he tried to tell N to give him the gun so he could be killed by a professional killer. N was going crazy and he pointed the gun at everyone of us, screaming at each other and crying hysterically. At that moment I had a feeling that someone was sticking their high-heeled shoe into my hand. But I couldn't feel it. I moved my hand and they were wet (that's what I felt). I was seeing fire and N's face looked all blurred. I was freaking out. I tried to tell C what I was feeling but I couldn't manage to articulate my words enough to do so.

RJ and N were arguing for a while. I think it was 4:10 when they left. We all decided to smoke a blunt at 4:20am and play traffic lights (where you can't exhale until the blunt gets back to you)' I went to sleep at 4:45am I had to sleep on the floor, I was still tripping really hard and I felt really uncomfortable on the floor so I started to think that I was sleeping on a cloud, it felt so good and nice, I wasn't cold or hot, I wasn't happy or sad, I wasn't here or dreaming, when all of the sudden I began to cry, I was bowling my eyes so hard that I had to go and wake C up.

I hugged her and told her how bad I felt for this kid N. We were sitting on the closet in front of G's bed we were crying so hard that he woke up and gave us a hug and something to drink. We fell asleep probably at 5:30am. I had the weirdest dream ever. I woke up at 11:00am on Sunday and G was crying in the bathroom. Everyone woke up, RJ never got back. We didn't know what had happened the night before until M told us that N killed himself. It was sad, crazy and unbelievable.

D, B, J, C and me went to Denny's to get something to eat. When we got back to G's apt. the police was waiting for us. I was so scared because I'm 17 yrs old, my mom didn't know what I was doing that night and if the police would've found any kind of drugs in G's apt. they would definitely send me back to Colombia and messed up my residence papers. They took us and asked us a bunch of questions individually. Nick (N) committed suicide on June 22nd while he was on acid, crack, xanax, alcohol and weed. Rich Bonet (RJ) saw him shoot himself. The police found the gun in the pond because RJ panicked and threw it in the lake.

That whole entire week (June 21-June27) was the craziest and fucked up week I have ever had in my short life. Now every time we smoke a blunt, joint, bong or we take a shot we do it in memory of Nick. We all went to the memorial which was pretty sad. All that I can remember now is his face when I was in the couch upside down. I could see really weird shit. Like the bullet from the gun penetrating my brain and blood all over. I saw everything and everyone in cartoon form. When we were smoking our last bowl at 4:20 I felt how the smoke intensely filled up my lungs. I remember every single detail.  I have also had flashbacks, trails, and mild ego dissolutions since then, that was the last time I tripped.

RJ left and E became our new drug. G got kicked out from his apt. and he's now living with at E's house. The rest of us keep smoking and trying to live.

I sincerely hope this will help somebody in some way. Know yourself and your environment. Don't do too much shit! Enjoy life and be happy or die trying.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 25547

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Oct 9, 2006	Views: 63,216

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Alcohol - Hard (198), Cannabis (1), LSD (2) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Train Wrecks &amp; Trip Disasters (7)


		 DOSE:
 T+ 0:00

		 oral
		 Alcohol

		   T+ 24:00

		 smoked
		 Cannabis

		   T+ 48:00
		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

Hi, my name is Cheryl, I'm a 31 year old stay at home mom.  Prior to this time I had done one hit of LSD five years ago and had a good time with it...it took forever to come down-I felt the effects the next day but otherwise good.  I had smoked pot maybe 5 times in my life, I liked to drink to have fun...I don't believe you have to do drugs to have fun.  I had suffered from depression on and off throughout my life and in the last 10 years had experienced some panic attacks.  This is my story:

In the end of August 2003 my husband and I went to Jamaica for his friends wedding.  I was anxious about the trip...leaving my kids (a boy 6 and a girl 3) but he really wanted me to go.  Two weeks before the trip I started taking an antidepressant and decided not to take it the week we were in Jamaica.  The day before we left I had a really bad feeling about the trip and left a letter for my kids in case something happened to us, telling them how I loved them, etc. (I wish now I had just stayed home...but listen..)

The first day in Jamaica I got really drunk on their Banana Daquiris and the next day I had the worst hangover of my life.  So I decided I would smoke pot (very uncharacteristic of me) all day since I couldn't drink.  Then the next night I made the biggest mistake of my life.  My husband and his friends were sitting around the pool and offered me some acid.  I was on vacation, I figured what the hell.  Well his friend gives me two hits of acid, one brown, one white.  That is when my Hell began.

After taking the LSD and sitting around for a while I remember walking around with him and a couple of his friends and everything feeling out of touch.  When we went back to our room and layed down it was like I went inside myself and I felt different personalities emerging and I felt that my husband was trying to pick the one he wanted.  I was overcome with a fear that the real me was dying and that my husband was evil and the devil was coming into me.  That was the first of many hallucinations I had for the next 3 months.

We got home safely from Jamaica and I was still out of it... 2 days after getting home I was admitted to the Mental Ward for 10 days.  I was assigned a Pyschiatrist and he diagnosed me with LSD-induced Psychosis.  That was the first of five trips (each was about a week long) to the Mental Ward from September through the end of November.  The time I spent there was an experience in itself too.  Many different kinds of people there-drug addicts, suicidal people, severely depressed people.  It was not what I had always believed-people wearing the white jacket.

I was on three different antipsychotic drugs...one, I think it was Haldol...made me a zombie and I was so depressed becuase during all those months I couldn't take care of my children (had to go to daycare during the day), I couldn't even drive a car-it came to a point that I just wanted to commit suicide.  I couldn't do that though because the love I have for my children carried me through.  My nurses can attest to that - I forgot my own name one time I was in the hospital but I knew I had my kids.

Well here it is May 2004 and I have not went Psychotic since the end of November and I have been off anti-psychotic meds for 6 weeks.  Right now I am just on Zoloft (anti-depressant) and Depakote (controls mania).  But I have been severely depressed and have no energy and have gained 24 pounds in the last 5 months.  I have been living in fear of relapsing and disrupting my children's lives again and being locked up in the mental ward again. Last night I had such a vivid nightmare I woke up and had a full blown panic attack...It was like reliving my ordeal in Jamaica with my 'personalities'.  My pyschologist made me feel much better today.  She said anyone that has lived through a tramatic experience will have times that are tougher than others.  Its kind of like I have post-traumatic syndrome now.

On top of all I've mentioned above we have hospital bills totalling about $2000 (insurance only pays 30 inpatient days) and the added cost of daycare for my children for the 3 months I couldn't take care of them.  It ended up being a VERY expensive 'trip'.

Sorry this is such a long story but I have wanted my voice to be heard on this subject and I have found an outlet here.  I don't believe anyone should try LSD.  There is also the fact I quit taking my anti-depressent and smoked pot the day before dosing that may have added to the damage LSD caused me.  But I believe and more importantly, my pyschiatrist believes, this wouldn't have happened had I not done the LSD.  I'll never underestimate anything that can have an effect on my mental stability and I warn everyone that reads this to think about it too. Even if the chance is one in a thousand of this happening to you...do you want to gamble with your mind?

Thank god I got mine back...I'm just praying my brain chemicals are back where they are supposed to be and stay there.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 33340

Gender: Female

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Oct 11, 2006	Views: 11,786

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LSD (2) : Depression (15), Post Trip Problems (8), Difficult Experiences (5), Small Group (2-9) (17)


		 DOSE:

		 2 hits
		 oral
		 LSD
		 (blotter / tab)

           BODY WEIGHT:
	   145 lb

I was planning on taking a hit of 2C-I at this show in NYC.  A friend of mine brought it down in a big bottle of vodka, so I transferred it to small, airplane sized plastic bottle.  Unbeknownst to me, the bottle's cap was cracked, and the whole thing spilt out into my pocket. I was pretty bummed.  But we got to the show, I was having a good time, and I decided to hunt around for something else I could do, maybe a hit of shrooms.  Me and my friend searched the entire theatre, but everybody came up dry.  Eventually, we stumbled upon this man, perhaps in his 40's, who my friend began to chat with.  The guy didn't have shrooms, but liked my friend enough that he decided to rip of a few hits of acid from his own stash and give them to us for free.  Unlikely, but it happened.

I wasn't really prepared to do acid, I hadn't thought I was going to, but I figured I wanted something to do, and although I didn't know exactly what the dose was, it was sure to be low, so I dosed it.  This was approximately 9:00, just after the first set.  We had orchestra seats, but the sound was better up in the balcony, so we headed up there to trip, with a few of our other friends.  I was a little nervous, but I wasn't feeling anything, even by the end of the show.  I realized I had trouble holding my cigarette, but wrote it off to excitement (I was grooving the music pretty hard).  Remember, this is my first experience with acid, or even any hallucinogen for that matter.  I noticed a energy boost, a mood elevation too, but like I said, I wrote it off to just having a good time at a good show.  I didn't have any visuals, so I didn't think I was tripping.

So the show ended(11:00), and to tell the truth, even without thinking I was tripping, I felt more connected to people.  Lots of friends from my school were there, and I just felt like saying 'hi' and hugging all of them.  Anyway, when I got outside where the lights from the show weren't flashing and the atmosphere was a little more stable, I started to feel something.  It was somewhat like the feeling you get when you've been in a room with a strobe light...kinda zonked.  People began to tell me my pupils were HUGE and I accepted that I was tripping.  I still didn't really have any visuals, but things did look a bit different.

Lights shimmered a little and seemed brighter (makes sense if my pupils are big).  More than anything else, I noticed a good deal of confusion.  Trying to get into the subway with the ticket machine broken was ridiculously difficult.  The door some people walk through to get OUT of the subway opened...and somehow I ended up on the other side, and not getting caught by the cops (lucky me).

Also, I couldn't stop smiling or laughing, non-stop.  I felt good...I felt...spun.  I was tripping.  I was a real head trip, no visuals, but I was really in a different state of mind.  I was waling around New York City, looking at the sky, the sky-scrapers, and just talking to people on the street, having a good time.  I smoked a lot of cigarettes too, it felt good.  So that was good, I guess...but it was also a little uncomfortable.  I had so much energy I didn't know what to do with it.  It was good at the show, but on the train and trying to go to bed for two and a half hours was pretty annoying.  I ended up reading Dostoyevesk's Crime and Punishment, which was pretty awesome, especially while tripping.

When I woke up the next morning, I was kinda burnt.  I wasn't really tired (I was later in the day) but I was different. I saw things differently, so it seemed.  I was thinking differently and I felt a stronger connection to reality.  It's really hard to explain.  It wasn't a bad experience at all, but it wasn't 'glowing'.

So that's it.  It wasn't awesome, it wasn't terrible, it was good.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 28869

Gender: Male

Age at time of experience: Not Given

Published: Oct 21, 2006	Views: 6,887

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LSD (2) : First Times (2), Festival / Lg. Crowd (24)