AUSTIN, TX -- As if the race for the GOP nomination weren't enough of a spectacle already, it's now reached truly tabloid proportions.

This is meant in a literal sense.

In its current issue, the National Enquirer purports to have uncovered a pattern of philandering by Sen. Ted Cruz, who's emerged as the only Republican rival viable enough to challenge reality-television-star-turned-politician Donald Trump.

"Presidential candidate Ted Cruz is trying to survive an explosive 'dirt file' on the finger-wagging conservative senator!" the Enquirer dishes. "And the new issue of The National ENQUIRER — on newsstands now — reveals how the reports say the staunch Republican is hiding FIVE different mistresses!"

Citing a "Washington insider" as its source, the gossip rage reports private detectives have been investigation the alleged affairs. The details were "leaked" to the publication in an effort to derail his campaign, they added.

By mid-Friday, Cruz reacted to the reports by labeling them as "garbage" orchestrated by Trump. He posted a statement of the reports on the Ted Cruz Facebook page.

"I want to be crystal clear: these attacks are garbage. For Donald J. Trumpto enlist his friends at the National Enquirer and his political henchmen to do his bidding shows you that there is no low Donald won't go."

He denied the Enquire's allegations of extra-marital affairs, categorizing them as offensive to his wife, Heidi Cruz, and their family: "These smears are completely false, they're offensive to Heidi and me, they're offensive to our daughters, and they're offensive to everyone Donald continues to personally attack."

Within the hour, Trump answered his rival's accusations that he orchestrated the story in the gossip magazine.

"I have no idea whether or not the cover story about Ted Cruz in this week's issue of the National Enquirer is true or not," he wrote. "But I had absolutely nothing to do with it, did not know about it, and have not, as yet, read it."

But even amid the denial, he took jabs at Cruz. In his statement, he betrays a lingering outrage over the photo of his naked wife used by Cruz supporters -- still adhering that it was Cruz who was responsible for its use in a political ad.

"I have nothing to do with the National Enquirer," he wrote. "And unlike Lyin' Ted Cruz, I do not surround myself with political hacks and henchmen and then pretend total innocence."

Clearly, the gloves are off. Rhetorical exchanges between the two men once reserved for the debate stage are now conducted in the frenetic back-and-forth swiping of social media.

The teaser for the Enquire issue is (surprise) salacious, with liberal use of exclamation marks as if details on the scandalous dispatch weren't being adequately conveyed through mere words: "The ENQUIRER reports that Cruz's claimed mistresses include a foxy political consultant and a high-placed D.C. attorney!"

Oh, and "...even a wild sex worker makes the cut," in the mistress list, the Enquirer helpfully adds.

The entry of the tabloid into the campaign mix is the latest plot twist in a GOP drama pitting Cruz and Trump as rivals not only politically, but personally as well. The two men have most recently been involved in an exchange of attacks centered on each others' wives.

That bit of drama was sparked when a Cruz-supporting super PAC released an ad featuring a photo of The Donald's model wife, posing nude for a magazine layout. The photo served as illustration to question Melania Trump's fitness as a potential First Lady.

The Donald took great umbrage (as he's prone to do), attributing release of the meme-like ad to Cruz himself despite the senator's assurance his camp had nothing to do with the ad's airing.

The Donald reacted in quintessentially The Donald fashion: He threatened to "spill the beans" on Heidi Cruz, his rival's wife, without specifying what the beans metaphor represented.

Then, he re-tweeted a follower's unflattering photo of Mrs. Cruz, prompting Sen. Cruz to label Trump as a "sniveling coward" in a press conference Thursday covered by CNN and other media outlets.

"It is not acceptable for a big, loud New York bully to attack my wife," Cruz said. "Donald, you're a sniveling coward, and leave Heidi the hell alone."

In response, Trump sent out yet another tweet: "I didn't start the fight with Lyin'Ted Cruz over the GQ cover pic of Melania, he did. He knew the PAC was putting it out - hence, Lyin' Ted!"

While the need to report on such matters borders on the unseemly (we feel vaguely sleazy even while typing this), there is some potential political impact from the Enquirer bombshell. Previously, the tabloid broke the story of John Edwards' own affair, which led to his political demise as he was on pace to secure the 2004 Democratic nomination.

"Sen. John Edwards Caught With Mistress And Love Child!" the headlines screamed back then. The gossip rag ended up being right, leading to the candidate first rejecting the claims before admitting them and prompting more legitimate newspapers to follow up on their reporting.

Will the revelation "Trump" Cruz's derail his chances of reaching the White House? Will the once-budding friendship between the two political rivals ever be restored? Will Trump be felled by carpal tunnel syndrome by over-Tweeting? Only time will tell!

Such are the days of their lives.