Evening all. As I type this Blackpool are top of the Premier League. Who'd've thunk it? Can Chelsea knock them off their perch this evening? They'll have a job to outscore Ian Holloway's Tangerines against a West Brom side sure to be fired up for the challenge.

Four successive friendly defeats ended Chelsea's pre-season preparations, and West Brom's 20-1 odds with the bookmakers looks pretty generous given the unpredictable nature of the opening day, but anything other than a home win would be a major shock.

The teams are already in:

Chelsea (probable: 4-1-2-3: Petr Cech; Paulo Ferreira, Terry, Alex, Cole; Mikel; Essien, Lampard; Anelka, Drogba, Malouda. Subs: Hilario, Ivanovic, Benayoun, Zhirkov, Kalou, Sturridge, Van Aanholt.

West Brom: Carson; Jara, Pablo Ibanez, Tamas, Marek Cech; Thomas, Mulumbu, Dorrans, Brunt, Morrison; Bednar. Subs: Myhill, Olsson, Barnes, Miller, Steven Reid, Shorey, Cox.

Referee: Mark Clattenburg (Tyne & Wear)

So Lampard and Cech are fit to start and Michael Essien makes his first league appearance since December. For Albion, Roman Bednar is preferred to Ismael Miller up front, and new signing Nicky Shorey has to be content with a place on the bench.

Click, clack, click, clack … here come the players.

Well, I say 'here come the players' … I have no visual help at the moment. The IT boys are all over it, but this could be a little sketchy for the first few minutes.

Peep! Mark Clattenburg gets us underway. Apparently.

3 min: OK, I now have visual - on Al-Jazeera Arabic (don't ask). But no sound. Not to worry, though. Nicolas Anelka has just had a shot.

5 min: Malouda skips through the middle and is brought tumbling down to earth. Dangerous free-kick ...

GOAL! Chelsea 1-0 West Brom (Malouda 6) ... Scott Carson, oh Scott Carson. Drogba lines up the shot, fizzes a sidefooter at goal, but it's straight at the keeper. Who proceeds to let the ball squirm from his grasp, drop to Mikel who dinks it square for Malouda to tap in.

7 min: It's got to be frustrating for Albion fans. You travel to Stamford Bridge you need a bit of luck, 100% effort from everybody on the pitch, and your goalkeeper to have a good day. Chelsea are likely to beat most teams without any help. The last thing you want to do is hand it to them on a plate. And then to let the plate squirm out of your hands at the feet on an onrushing attacker.

9 min: Not to excuse England's former No1, but it's tipping it down in south London. West Brom begin an attack from their left ...

10 min: .. and they've won a corner ... which is cleared away.

12 min: Jerome Thomas scampers down the left, and wins a free-kick. Chance for West Brom ...

13 min: ... Dorrans whips it in. Pablo Ibanez fouls Terry. Hmm.

15 min: Not sure if any Wigan fans are reading, but I share (some) of your pain today. My side lost 3-0 at home this afternoon - what's the best way to get over the disappointment of defeat?

16 min: Drogba charges down a clearance as Albion attempt to shoot themselves in the foot once more.

17 min: Dorrans wins a free-kick from Essien ... 35 yards out, central ... but pinged into the wall. "Now that the Jubliani isn't a convenient scapegoat, what's the cause of all the goalkeeping errors?" ponders Gary Naylor. "Is it that they just aren't as good as they used to be?" Joe Hart seemed to cope alright this afternoon ...

19 min: Dorrans slips Bednar through ... but the big striker is just offside.

20 min: Drogba thumps into Ibanez to concede a free-kick. The goal apart, this has been a fairly flat start from the champions.

21 min: Thomas again beats Ferreira down the Chelsea right, slips it in to Bednar, but his flick in the direction of Dorrans doesn't quite come off.

22 min: Lampard volleys at goal, the ball deflects to Malouda who drags his shot just wide. But was offside anyway.

24 min: Possession football from West Brom, a decent spell that ends when Thomas's cross thwocks satisfyingly into the palms of Petr Cech.

26 min: Chelsea's turn to hog the ball, spraying the thing from right to left and back again. And then again. And again. Albion finally get a foot in a hoof it away.

28 min: "Afternoon John. Stuck indoors due to rain (it's August!) and WBA down a goal in six minutes," writes Rena Patel. "Gutted. Getting over disappointment? Surely it's blowing a vuvuzela. Oh wait …"

29 min: Thomas floats another cross in and Alex does well to clear. Whisper it, but West Brom have probably been the better side here.

31 min: Sky Sports' Yellow Ticker Of Doom is reporting that Kevin Blackwell has become the first manager to be sacked this season, making my Football League blog today look rather prescient. Meanwhile, it's turned into a midfield battle at the Bridge, neither side able to emerge from the central third.

33 min: Anelka's low cross is cut out. Corner ...

34 min: ... headed away at the near post.

35 min: Anelka goes streaking after a through-ball but can't quite keep it in play. The home fans show their appreciation for the work rate.

36 min: Malouda spanks the post. But once again he's strayed offside.

37 min: What a touch this is from Frank Lampard! A sort of reverse-dragged-no-look-flick to Malouda, who can't quite hold off Jara.

39 min: Drogba wins another dangerous free-kick from Tamas …

40 min: … Lampard blasts it through the wall, Carson palms away, and Malouda heads over when he might have done much better. Carson, not unjustifiably, is furious with his defenders.

41 min: Albion get down the other end, again it's Jerome Thomas tearing past Paulo Ferreira, but again his crossing lets him down.

43 min: Brunt has a pop with his left - blocked - but he found a decent amount of space there, 25 yards out, and he's not the sort of player any team should be offering a shot at goal with his left peg.

44 min: Alex can't quite slip the ball through to Malouda on the edge of the area, but, seconds later, the home side have another dangerous free-kick, 30 yards out ...

GOAL! Chelsea 2-0 West Brom (Drogba 45): West Brom have been asking for this. Again the wall fails to do it's job, Drogba's effort going straight through the middle at chest height, and Carson can't get there at the near post.

Peep! Peep! Peeeep! Half-time, and Chelsea 2-0 up thanks to two, from Albion's point of view, entirely preventable goals.

Half-time email dept. Cupboard's a bit bare actually. Anyone got anything to say?

Half-time snack dept. Just a cup of tea, thanks. Milk, no sugar. Biscuit? No, not for me. I had a scotch egg for my lunch and it's making me feel a little queasy.

PEEP! Chelsea get half No2 underway.

46 min: Albion on the attack early on.

47 min: "Scotch Egg, you'll be eating prawn sandwiches next – what's up with you?" asks Chris Linthwaite. I hardly think a scotch egg can be considered in any way bourgeois. Nice little passage from Albion, with Dorrans at the heart, but the not-quite-good-enough-for-this-level-I'm-afraid Bednar gives the ball away.

49 min: "I do have something to say: I'm thoroughly depressed right now," writes Zoltán Bába. "This is supposed to be a very exciting season, what with a thousand teams aiming to reach those CL places but it depresses me that Chelsea have no credible challengers. We all know they're going to destroy WBA today; we all know they're going to win the league quite comfortably. Blackpool cheered me up a little but I hate that we already know who'll be champions in May 2011 ..." Not quite sure what to make of that one ...

50 min: Lovely stuff from Chelsea, Drogba and Ferreira involved. Malouda, though, scuffs his shot well wide.

51 min: Ferreira gives the ball away horribly to Dorrans, who strides forward and crunches a shot at goal. Deflected ... and it spins just wide.

52 min: Essien and Marek Cech tangle maybe eight yards outside the Chelsea area. Looks a Chelsea free-kick if anything, but it's gone to Albion. Danger here ...

53 min: ... curled just over by Dorrans. Decent effort.

GOAL! Chelsea 3-0 West Brom (Drogba 55): Malouda's corner is met my Terry, whose header is kept out off the line by Mulumbu. He can't quite get it clear, though, and after a brief scramble Drogba is on hand to hammer home.

56 min: Stick a fork in this one - it's done.

58 min: "I was going to let this slide, not wanting to go all pedantic but as you seem to be all alone out there ..." begins Greg Scully. "Gary Naylor (welcome back, btw) is rarely wrong, but in this instance (17 min) he has fallen into the same trap as 95% of commentators during the World Cup: The name of the ball used in the World Cup is the 'Jabulani', which confusingly means 'rejoice' in Zulu, and not 'Jubilani' which sounds almost identical to a Soweto slang word for 'unmarried mother' (Clive Tyldesley please note). Needless to say, I found this hilarious for the first few matches of the World Cup. Then it became annoying. Now it just makes my fists itch." Ivanovic replaces Ferreira.

60 min: "The word Albion literally translates to 'chalk' while the name Chelsea means 'wharf for unloading chalk'," reckons Mike Hanton. "There's probably a brilliant metaphor for this game to be derived from that but I can't be bothered to work out what it might be." Chelsea have taken their foot off the gas here, while Albion knock the ball about ineffectually. This could be the pattern for a while.

GOAL! Chelsea 4-0 West Brom (Lampard 63): Anelka, Cole, Lampard, bish, bash, bosh, 4-0. It's actually a lovely goal, Anelka dragging the defence out of position with his movement, but the Baggies made it too easy.

64 min: So as it stands, Chelsea are second in the league, behind Blackpool on alphabetical order. Benayoun comes on for his Chelsea debut in place of Lampard.

66 min: Bednar trudges off to be replaced by Ishmael Miller and Dorrans makes way for Simon Cox. So Albion will go two-up (an attacking move) but also tacitally admit defeat by withdrawing their best player. Fair enough really.

GOAL! Chelsea 5-0 West Brom (Drogba 68) Drogba completes his hat-trick with a thumping drive that takes a huge deflection off, I think, Marek Cech.

69 min: So Chelsea, spoilsports that they are, look set to knock Blackpool off that top spot in tomorrow morning's back pages.

70 min: Drogba takes a rest from bagging the points for my Fantasy Football team and on comes Salomon Kalou.

71 min: I was talking to an Albion season ticket holder and shareholder at a wedding last weekend, and asked him a question that always puzzles me: Do Baggies fans enjoy this Yo-Yo business? Would you rather the club spend a bit of cash in an attempt to keep you up? And do you know what? He loves it. Better than being a perrennial mid-table water-treader is his reasoned argument. Shouldn't think he's enjoying it too much in the away end today though.

74 min: Pass, pass, pass from Chelsea, who are having more possession than the Amityville house.

76 min: Benayoun goes charging through the middle and almost puts Kalou in. Smuggled away by Albion.

77 min: "Wow! Who is the Marilyn Monroe looky-likey in the crowd?" asks Jonny Mac. Look, I'm watching this on a TV the best part of 10 yards away, without commentary, a scotch egg is taking its revenge on me and Kevin Blackwell has just been sacked … I'm in no state to field those sorts of questions. Free-kick to Chelsea …

79 min: … curled narrowly over by Malouda.

82 min: This has gone flatter than three-day-old ginger beer with the lid left off. Giles Barnes comes on for Jerome Thomas.

84 min: So close! Miller finds Cech down the left, he pulls the ball back to Brunt whose effort might well be nestling in the top corner before Terry flicks the ball away. Corner to Albion …

85 min: … headed away. Brunt then tries his luck from 40-odd yards, but it's well wide.

88 min: Miller can't quite get on the end of Barnes's cross, then Cox fizzes an effort just wide. Two half-chances there which made me lose my train of thought ...

89 min: … ah, now I remember. Pleaty, a quite lovely man by the way, has just described an attempted long crossfield pass from an Albion player as a 'Honeymoon ball'. I think he probably means 'Hollywood ball'. But somehow I like the idea of a honeymoon pass ...

GOAL! Chelsea 6-0 West Brom (Malouda 90): It's six. Anelka floats a lovely lofted ball over Albion's wonky back four. Malouda calmly controls and does the rest.

90+1 min: Just a few more minutes for Albion to put up with now. And my mum has just phonedm, suggesting she isn't reading this. I need to have words.

Peep! Peep! Peeeeeep! That's it. Albion put out of their misery. Chelsea continue where they left off in May. Ancelotti's side have now scored 21 goals in their past three home league games.

Right, that's me. Thanks, as ever, for all your emails. Be sure to head back tomorrow for Manchester United v Newcastle. But from me, cheerio!