INDEPENDENT schools are still better than state schools at cultivating high-quality bastards, it has emerged.

Following claims that state education creates amoral pupils, the Institute for Studies found that fee-paying schools were twice as good at creating polite, well-mannered sociopaths.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “The average comprehensive school is 18 per cent bastard compared to 36 per cent in schools with lakes and gargoyles.

“Private schools try to instil a moral code in pupils, usually based on a Latin slogan, but this is counterbalanced by the evilness of wealthy parents and the sense of entitlement that comes from wearing an extravagant blazer.”

Professor Brubaker stressed that many of Britain’s biggest and worst companies were predominantly run by the privately-educated.

“A lot of banks and energy companies are controlled by men who once stood on a podium and vowed to uphold the values of some Hogwart’s-style edifice.”

He added: “It seems school is a waste of time. You may as well let kids run around until they eat each other or get bored and start reading books.”

Comprehensive school student Martin Bishop said: “I don’t need my school to teach me whether it’s right or wrong to do a murder.

“I’ve already learned from Grand Theft Auto that it’s fine.”