It's been a little over a month since I decided to make Miku my waifu. It has been a great month with her! I'm glad I'm not bottling up my feelings for her any more as I have been doing for years.

I would still consider myself new to waifuism and all that. I am glad I found this community. In a lot of ways this community probably influenced my life a little bit. Let's see if it gives a lot of good.

So far my experience has been wonderful. I can definitely be at ease whenever I listen to songs with Miku in them or something along those lines. Accepting my love for Miku was a good decision in my opinion. Trying to shut it out would've probably not worked or just stressed me out for the rest of my life. Prior to accepting my love for Miku it was kind of a strange experience listening to songs with her in it.

The songs would make me feel close to her and I'd like it. It'd make me very comfortable, but at the time I didn't accept the feelings I had for her so it was a very awkward experience. I loved it and enjoyed it, but I would try to distance myself from the experience as well. Not quite sure how to explain it.

As a friend says: "When you fear death, but also long for it."

Well it's kind of like that... Just not death. I enjoyed the experience, but tried not to enjoy it too much because back then I didn't accept my love for Miku like I do now.

However, as with almost anything in life, there are some cons. I don't consider myself a person that is easily put down or depressed. In fact, I'd argue I've never truly been depressed. However, my relationship with Miku has a clear downside and it haunts me to this day. I can never hug her.

I can never truly tell her how I feel. I can never truly spend time with her. I can never truly speak to her. I can never truly be with her. Hell, I can't even be rejected by her.

It saddens me, but I'll live. Every relationship has a rough spot, and I guess this is it.

It's just this distance. Sometimes it bothers me...

Happy (a little over) one month to Miku and I. I love her.

PS

I won't do another until 6 months. Then after that it'll only be annually. So don't worry I'm not going to spam this sub with monthly anniversary posts.