The very serious city of Oregon, Ohio, is renaming itself in advance of the College Football Playoff National Championship next week, so as not to be mistaken for supporters of one of the teams competing in it.

No, sir: Oregon, Ohio, does not ride for the University of Oregon.* That's why Oregon (Ohio) Mayor Michal Seferian issued a proclamation yesterday that will temporarily rename Oregon, Ohio, as "Oregon, Ohio Buckeyes on the Bay, City of Duck Hunters."

The city earned its new serial-comma-murdering, refrigerator-poetry-sounding moniker after former Oregon, Ohio, resident Matt Squibb mounted a Change.org campaign that netted a couple thousand signatures.

"Call it Buckeye Town, Ohio City, Brutusville, whatever, you get the point. Let's not leave anything to chance here! Change the name and support the Buckeyes!" the petition reads. "Also, maybe Clay High School should officially change their school colors for the day."

Oregon, Ohio, does not ride for the University of Oregon. That's why Mayor Michal Seferian issued a proclamation to temporarily name the city "Oregon, Ohio Buckeyes on the Bay, City of Duck Hunters."

Next week—from January 5 through the championship game between the Oregon Ducks and the Ohio State Buckeyes on January 12—Squibb will be a former resident of Oregon, Ohio Buckeyes on the Bay, City of Duck Hunters.

The mayoral proclamation, which designates next week as "The Ohio State Buckeye Week in the City of Oregon, Ohio"—wait, shouldn't that be "The Ohio State Buckeye Week in the City of Oregon, Ohio Buckeyes on the Bay, City of Duck Hunters"?—acknowledges that some fans in [city name] are being asked to set aside their natural allegiances.