Mike Griffin Appointed New President of UAH - Changes Name of University to NASA

I wrote this story for the UAH campus newspaper, The Exponent, for an April Fool’s Day article. It was published in 2010.

Proposed changes to the Materials Science Center (Photo Courtesty of UAH, altered by Matt Sayar)

In a surprising move Monday, Dr. David Williams stepped down as president of UAH and appointed Mike Griffin, former National Aeronautics and Space Administration director, to be the new president of our university. Dr. Griffin’s first act upon attaining his office was to rename the university once again to the North Alabama Science and Aerospace University, or NASA.

“I believe I made the right decision by following in my predecessor’s footsteps,” said Dr. Griffin on the name change. “I can think of a really cool logo that would help make it instantly recognizable, too.”

When asked about the decision to step down, Dr. Williams commented, “Mike has such excellent ideas for where he wants to take this university. I thought I’d help make it easier for him to accomplish his goals by removing the middleman. Me.”

What exactly are his goals? “I plan on expanding the already robust Aerospace Engineering program that this university prides itself on,” stated Dr. Griffin. “I want to expand our relationship and work more closely with Marshall Space Flight Center. If they want to move their offices over here, that could work, too.”

“We’ve already begun talks with the US Space and Rocket Center to relocate the working Saturn V rocket to campus,” Dr. Griffin said excitedly. “For uh, research,” he added, making air quotes with both of his hands.

Mike Griffin plans on hosting an open house to field any questions or concerns the community might have. Anyone interested should visit the newly renamed “NASA Control Room Auditorium” located in the Materials Science Center this Thursday, April 1st.