I was super apprehensive after stumbling upon this subreddit. But...yall are actually on to something. Especially if its a WMAF.

So anyway I wanted to test this with my own mom. I asked her what kind of man she would want me to marry one day. She responded with, "A white man. You look white anyway." I pressed on and asked her why not an Asian man. She grew kind of irritated and asked me why it mattered. She eventually said "Asian men don't like white girls anyway. It is just better to marry a white guy."

I asked her which she would prefer Id marry: an asian or a black guy. She had to think about her response much longer this time. But eventually said black.

I always loved being mixed. I don't believe I look completely white passing, although I would say I lean toward looking more white than asian. I never realized it but as a younger girl, especially early teen years, I would purposely try to look more white. At the time I never really thought about WHY I wanted to look more white; it was just something I did as I saw my mother lighten her skin, dyed her hair, got colored contacts etc.

Damn. I'm really not trying to adopt my mom's self hatred. Where do you go from here?