The Heartbreaking Truth

Not so fast, Scrooge McRockefeller. All the flashing lights in the world don't add up to a payoff if the casino in charge claims the machine experienced a malfunction or a software glitch. After all, slot machines these days are just computers, and computers screw up all the time.

Just ask Chuck and Tisha Barry. When they went to collect their $31,000, the casino scoffed and said it was all one big, hilarious mistake. The Barrys walked away with nothing but the 80 cents they put into the machine and a deep regret for screaming "IN YOUR FACE, PEASANTS!" to all the other casino patrons.

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"You can bet we'll be taking our 80 cents to a competing casino."

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But that probably didn't sting as hard as the $43 million Louise Chavez didn't get to see because of her malfunctioning machine. Granted, she probably should have known something was amiss, since the penny slots only advertised a $251,000 top prize. Does a casino even have $43 million to give away? Still, you'd think that maybe at the very least she'd win the top prize they do give out. Nope. Eventually, the home assistant who only makes $12,000 a year was awarded the prize the casino bosses said she'd actually won: $6.60. So, yeah, the computer messed up some digits there.

Meanwhile, Swiss gambler Behar Merlaku took the time to take a picture of his $57 million winning screen when he hit it big at an Austrian casino. Once again, the casino claimed "software error," and, unfortunately, his own pictures might prove the case against him: They clearly show only four of the five fruit symbols required for a win. Plus, Austrian law is very clear that the most anyone could win at a casino was about $2.5 million.

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So your 100-foot statue of yourself would only be gold plated.

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But once more, the casino didn't offer even the $2.5 million, or some fraction of the prize the machine said he'd won (say, $57,000, or a thousandth of the announced winnings). They offered 100 bucks and a free meal. He turned it down, choosing to take it to court instead. We have a feeling it's not gonna happen, Behar.