While I was pregnant with my son, I was browsing posts in a favorite Facebook group when I saw someone posted a comic about a woman who adored her cat — until she had a baby, that is. Once she had the baby, she pushed the annoying cat aside. The post was filled with comments from others chiming in about how they stopped loving their cats and dogs once Thank you so much for your feedback!they had a baby.

I was chock full of pregnancy hormones and instantly burst into tears. I adored my cat. She was more than just a cat, she was my best friend, my feline soulmate. I always loved cats, and knew I wanted my own after taking care of my friend Caitlin’s cat, Badger, during Hurricane Sandy.

Caitlin adopted Badger from the Liberty Humane Society in Jersey City, NJ and I planned on going to the same place. Like my friend, I hoped to adopt a young adult cat. I thought that by adopting an adult cat I would be able to judge the cat’s personality better and find a cat that suited me and my lifestyle. At the shelter, a friend and I met and held several cats that fit my criteria. But none of them seemed like the perfect cat for me. I thought about going home and coming back when they had a new crop of cats. My friend suggested I take a look at the kittens.

I’d completely ignored the kittens. I assumed they were all feral. I figured they’d be adopted anyway and didn’t need me as much as the adult cats did. But I thought I’d take one look. I turned to the cage of kittens nearest me and one kitten looked at me through the bars and meowed. “I want to see that one,” I told my friend.

The kitten was male, I assumed, since he had long orange fur. When my friend handed him to me, he began to purr. “He’s purring!” I said. I looked down at the tiny bundle of fluff. I was already falling in love with this little kitten. Then he did something remarkable. He reached up with his little face and rubbed that tiny kitten nose against my nose. “He kissed me!” I said.

“I guess we found your cat,” my friend said.

We talked to the staff, who told us the kitten was actually a girl. Then they let me take this adorable kitten who had chosen me, home.

I named her Sashimi.

Sashimi did everything with gusto. When she cuddled, she got right up in your face and purred like an engine. When she played, she was ferocious. She played fetch. She chased flies. She greeted me when I came home and didn’t stop meowing until I sat down to snuggle her. She was my best friend.

Zonked Kitten

She’s still my best friend. We’ve been through a lot together, like moving back to Michigan. I told her the moment I found out I was pregnant, before anyone else. When I found that Facebook post, I worried. I knew I couldn’t just stop loving her. I was determined she would always have a place in my family and in my heart.

The day we came home from the hospital with my son, Sashimi greeted me on the ledge of the stairs so happy to see me after my two days away. Tired and glad to finally be home, I was happy to see her, too.

Bringing home a baby changes everything, and my relationship with Sashimi was no different. We had to alter our schedule. Instead of our regular cuddle session after work, we moved it to before I went to bed. Even after an eight hour day at work followed by spending time with a growing and demanding baby, I still made time for my cat. I now give her a treat (either her favorite, peanut butter, or a kitty treat) in the morning. As she’s gotten older and mellowed out quite a bit, she requires less play time (although I still get out the laser pointer every now and again). She gets most of her energy out playing with my partner’s cat, Wally.

They moved in together before my son was born, and they quickly became friends. They act like siblings — cuddling contentedly together one minute and chasing each other around the house the next. I’d suggest that anyone worried about how their cat will react to a new baby to consider adopting a second cat. Wally and Sashimi are close in age and have similar temperaments. A shelter can help you find a cat that will get along with the cat you already have.

Wally and Sashimi, Being Best Friends

Every day I look forward to that moment when Sashimi jumps up on my lap for pets and scratches. In the chaos of being a parent, I need that moment of calm. I’m glad I made maintaining my relationship with my cat a priority, and I think she does, too.