Are you up for the ultimate adventure? Nothing is quite as challenging as your first time driving in Melbourne, Australia.

Yes, you may drive in Australia if you have a current drivers license that has been issued in English. (If not in English you will need to carry an international Driving Permit.)

Driving here is definitely a brain teaser, a physical workout and dangerous to boot.

This endeavor requires putting aside all rules you’ve learned pertaining to driving a car and have practiced almost subconsciously for the past few decades.

First get in the car, sounds like a basic instruction, although did

I mention you will have to go around to the passenger side

front seat because that’s where you will find the steering wheel. All cars are right hand drive.

Now buckle –up, cuz it is the law. (For good reason too.) Australians are said to live ten inches off the tail bumper. Their ‘no worries’ philosophy transfers to their driving habits. Translating into what seems to be a ‘free for all’, especially on the roadways (highways).

A quick inspection of your car may be helpful.The tryes (tires) balanced, the windscreen(windshield) clean, indicators(blinkers)

functioning properly and the bonnet (hood) and boot (trunk) securely closed.

Luckily, the ignition switch and foot pedal are where your brain tells you they should be. Unless you might be driving a manual transmission which then the stick shift is to the left side of the column.

“Gentlemen start your engines”..and you are off. It is all a game of right brain, left brain. Remember everything you do from now till your arrival at your final destination will be on the ‘wrong side of the road’, start off on the left, in fact always keep to the left.

This is really a strange sensation. If you’ve driven a roundabout on the west end of Billings, you can imagine how it would be to be steering, from the right side of the car, while driving to the left. The experience makes one a little dizzy!

Do you remember that chapter in math class when they taught you how to convert into the metric system? Well it pays off here that you paid attention. Take for instance a trip to the servo (gas station) to buy some petrol (gasoline). At first sight you are pleasantly surprised to find the signage (billboard) showing prices at $1.10. Until you realize that the price reflects the price per liter …and with 4 liters in a gallon, gas is $4.40 a gallon. The speed limit is another opportunity to use your metric conversion skills. The speed limit is 50 km/h in residential areas, 40 km/h in school zones, in the morning and afternoons and 100km/h on the highways. Luckily the car is equipped with a speed dial marked with these speeds.

You have to be ready to stop on a dime. Truckies (truck drivers) are the worst. Their attitude is “I’m bigger and higher up than you so hence I’ll cut you off or tailgate you.” Driver beware! Another stereotyped, bad driver, is the hoon driver ( young cocky motorcyclist). They literally, take their lives in their hands everytime they are out on the road. Statistics show that two motorcyclists are killed, per week, on the roadways of Melbourne. The final transport vehicle, one needs to give right away to, are the famous and charming historical Melbourne trams. They travel up and down the middle of the main streets passing back and forth every 15 minutes. You will know you are sharing the street with a tram if you will look up to discover the air space above the street has electric wires in which the trams run.

The rural roadways have challenges all their own. Especially between dusk and dawn in country areas when the ‘roos (kangaroos) are most active. It is comparable to our deer and antelope grazing along the highway in the evening. Interesting note: If you hit and kill one, always stop and check its pouch for live joeys (baby kangaroos), because females usually have one in the pouch. Wrap the joey tightly in a towel or old jumper (sweater), don’t feed or over-handle it, and take it to a vet in the nearest town or call one of the wildlife care groups.

Yes, to learn to drive in Melbourne is quite the challenge. In fact, the individual ‘states’ identify a ‘new ‘driver by marking their license plate with a big L. Now this doesn’t refer to loser but instead ‘learner’. A clear warning that this person at any moment could suffer a ‘right brain moment’ and take the wrong lane. Actually, the new driver to Australia graduates after one year from the big L to a big P. This P signifies ‘practicing’ and is on their license plate for two more years.

Whew! What a relief to arrive back home in one piece. You know those world famous Melbourne trams…..they are looking more charming all the time.

Until next time

Your roaming reporter,

Sherry Vogel