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Green Light Situation

I'm a 29 year old woman. I've been dating my boyfriend for 7 years, ever since I met him in a school club during my 3rd year of college.



Even though there are not many thrilling or heart-throbbing moments, he is confident, takes my side, and is trustworthy. We have the same tastes too, so we don't fight often at all.



It's kind of embarrassing, but it's the same in the bedroom. We are sexually compatible, but because it has been 7 years, there has not been anything new. Looking back, it seems like we're not as hot for each other as we used to be. When I was in my early 20s, I told myself I wouldn't leave my body in disuse, but now I'm not like that.



Was it last year? We were getting into it and it was getting hot and heavy, but it turned out we didn't have a condom. And my boyfriend said, "Ah, well we can't do anything about that" and went to sleep. I just accepted it. But thinking back on it, in the past, he would run out and search the whole neighborhood for a condom. I'm estimating we only do it about once a month now? Of course, it's not such a big problem that it messes with our relationship.



But one time when I was really busy, a few months passed by without us doing it, like it was nothing. To be honest, as a woman, my pride was hurt, but I didn't want the problem to get bigger, so I told him, "Have we become a middle-aged couple or something? For a few months we've only kissed." My boyfriend told me he understood and was kind of ashamed. After that, I thought that going 1 month without doing it might have just been a fluke.



But thinking back on it, I realized that my boyfriend's phone alarm would ring on a certain day. It was the song "You couldn't believe I…" by Lee Jung Hyun. Every day that song played, we made love. It seemed like my boyfriend set an alarm to ring once every month so he wouldn't forget. I had a suspicion, but I didn't confirm it.



But a few months ago, my boyfriend changed. I could say he changed for the better? Not long after we had our monthly lovemaking night, I wasn't even expecting it, but he came home and was acting like when we first started dating. I remembered the past and all my worries about us becoming bored of each other disappeared. After that, the days that my boyfriend wanted me increased in frequency and our relationship in other areas also improved when compared to before.



My boyfriend likes leaving the light on, but he knows that I get embarrassed and asks me if I would like the light turned off, and turns it off for me. He also gave me new perfume as a gift and sprayed some on me. I prefer pants to skirts, but he gave me a H-line skirt with the side open as a gift. I felt since my boyfriend is putting forth so much effort, I should also put forth effort for him. I wore it whenever my boyfriend wanted me to. He also bought me fishnet stockings and see-through blouses, and every time we had fun. I was happy and felt that if we try hard, even an old couple can regain passion in their relationship.



But a few days ago, I met my boyfriend on the way home from work and we were headed home. We were in the elevator and some lady hastily ran to the elevator, so I pressed the open button and waited for her. We were riding it, and I noticed her perfume smelled exactly the same as mine.



I just let it go, assuming nothing, but throughout the whole ride up, I felt like my boyfriend kept looking at her out of the corner of his eyes. She even seemed sexy to me, as well. She got off on the floor below us.



Not long ago, I ended up riding the same elevator with her, and while looking her over, I realized she was wearing a black dress with the cut on the side. And her perfume was the same. I saw her a few times, and she had black fishnet stockings and I caught a glimpse of her beige see-through blouse as well. Her style was that of an H-line skirt wearing office worker.



I felt like something strange was going on, like my boyfriend had bought her those clothes. Even so, I thought to myself, "It couldn't be." One weekend my boyfriend was smoking on the veranda when he went outside to take out the garbage. He usually hates doing that, so I wondered what was up and went out on the veranda to look down on him. That woman was in front of the dumpster.



My boyfriend approached her from behind and after throwing away the garbage, stared at her once, then came back inside. As soon as he came inside, he started to bring up the mood. I thought, "So that's what it was. What in the world…" and realized something.



I suddenly got mad at my boyfriend. "It turns out that you were getting turned on by that girl and then coming to me. That's why you bought her similar clothes and the same perfume. Is that why the fire in our relationship was turned back on?" I got fired up thinking all kinds of thoughts.



What does my boyfriend really want? But to be honest, he wasn't cheating and our relationship had gotten better. We talk about old memories often and go on dates more often. He treats me better and our relationship has gotten better overall. I kind of see this as him working hard to improve our relationship. I am curious about if other men have had this experience before.



Things are actually good right now. In the past, I convinced myself that, "Since we've dated for so long, things have cooled down. Let's just understand and accept it." Thinking back, I was really lonely. Not long ago, my boyfriend brought up the topic of marriage. From the outside, it looks perfect. But I am scared that the reason he is thinking about another woman while embracing me is because he doesn't love me.



What should I do?

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