People typically think of depression as something that can be said in passing when one is having a bad day or things aren’t going the right way at the time. It is said nonchalantly in passing conversation with no real meaning to it other than that that person is having a bad day, as many people do. But what they do not realize is that there is a whole other world that they haven’t even discovered because they never experienced it to the fullest effects. People say things and don’t mean them all the time. Someone could be genuinely crying out for help but their mind wouldn’t allow them to think any differently and so their situation couldn’t be helped. It takes a change of perspective in you but also depression is a whole other state of feeling, it feels heavy, dark and empty inside your soul and you want to cry because you can’t understand why you’re not able to do the things you used to. Why everything seems like a chore when life used to be so easy before. Why you feel useless and worthless, you can’t understand it, but it’s there, that feeling that is constantly lurking in the corner of your mind. And it’s maddening. People can get lost inside their own minds, build their own prisons, in fact and live in there for years on end in a life full of agony and lacking tenderness.

You feel like there’s this secret to life that everybody else knows, and you appreciate the smallest, simplest gestures of kindness more than everybody else but you don’t have the strength in yourself to even be grateful for it. The strength in your soul gets diminished and you can’t seem to stop it, it’s like your life is snowballing into a state of pure loathing for life. You don’t want it to be that way but it is, and you can’t do anything about it. You get lost in your own thoughts in your mind and let them eat away at your soul. It’s the most heart breaking feeling, especially seeing those around you being hurt by you hurting yourself. The ones you love caring about you is the most painful feeling because you can’t seem to shake the darkness off your soul. People around you all know the secret, the secret to happiness. Just be happy. Is that it? Really? No. In fact it takes a lot more than just a positive outlook to change from a state of depression, and I know how it feels. How hard it is to get up and make yourself believe that today is going to be good when you have no hope that it will be. You have no reasons for your sadness so your feelings are invalid. They don’t make sense. And everything in this world always has to make sense doesn’t it? Otherwise the world would fall into a state of chaos. And nobody knows how to handle chaos. They don’t want anything other than the norm, even though the best people are usually the craziest. Society wants to shape us into generic versions of ourselves so that they don’t get scared of our ideas. Even if you’re not depressed and fall into trouble they still feel the need to label you. And then you become that label, because everyone else says so.

Not everybody realizes that this can come about over a very short period of time, especially when it has to do with substance abuse. Most people would assume it builds up over a period of years. But it’s a trap that we can all easily fall into at any stage in our lives. Everything can seem all fine and dandy and then one day your life could turn upside down, everybody wants to experiment but don’t realize the hazards that the drugs can take on your mind. And your mind is the most important tool to get you through life: if you don’t have that, what do you have?

But it doesn’t have to be that way. It doesn’t have to be that way at all, in fact. You can choose to overcome your own feelings because sometimes that’s what you need to do to help others around you. Even if you don’t feel like you have the strength to do anything, if you do something, that matters. Your effort with life will never be lost. It can feel like every move you make you’re shooting yourself in the foot. It can feel like every time you try and say things that you end up making the situation worse. Trust me, you won’t. It matters what you do. It matters what you think, so think good thoughts. Because you are not your thoughts. You see, you are what you think of your thoughts. And that is the truth. If everybody is telling you things and trying to help you feel better, and it may feel like they don’t understand how you feel, but regardless of that you have to take their advice. Even if you don’t believe it at the time. Doing things really helps. Getting out into the sunshine, even when it’s raining the sun is still there, you’re still getting Vitamin D, so why not take a walk? You don’t need to talk to anyone if you don’t feel like it, but it’s good if you do. You are what you eat so make sure your food isn’t processed because you don’t want to feel like that. Drink lots of water because it’s the liquid of life. Truly. Laugh more, because a hearty laugh is sometimes the best medication. Don’t be afraid of getting help, don’t be afraid to reach out to people and explain how you’re feeling because the only way it’s going to get better is if you don’t run away from your life. Your life is wanting you to engage with it always, even when you don’t have the strength to do it, because regardless of what you may think, life loves you and you love life, you just don’t feel that way. Every single gesture in human existance is done with love in mind. People hate people because they love other people. People hate things because they see the ones they love loving their things more than themselves. People get frustrated when you don’t express your love. Because it is love that makes the world go round. Otherwise we would all stop moving. A simple hug can make the world of difference. Give love even when you don’t feel it and people will give you love back. It’s okay to feel bad. It’s okay not to understand. It’s okay that you can’t explain why you’re feeling down. Because guess what? There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Even when you can’t see it.

Most importantly, remember that you are not alone. The world is a beautiful symphony and life is the lyrics. You just have to listen to it.

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