Today my three year-old niece wanted to play "Hide and Go and Seek" as she calls it, and every time I went to go look for her and took too long she would come running out of her hiding spot saying she was "Right here, silly." 8576 meh 9596 #3362376 Comments: 311 Votes: average Share

Last month I got in a wreck where I wasn't at fault but the insurance put me at fault. I got several threatening text messages from the woman who hit me trying to make me accept fault. I found out that her new car got smashed to shit yesterday. I'm a suspect. MLIA. 3812 meh 2525 #3360988 Comments: 777 Votes: average Share

Today, I shaved my legs to the Armageddon film score. It was epic. MLIA 12397 meh 7104 #3362084 Comments: 1271 Votes: average Share

for christmas i got these awesome shoes, but when i tried them on, they didn't fit because my feet are wide. so i went to the store and tried on the next biggest size and my feet looked giant, so a few weeks later i just got a different style. 63 meh 102 #1693024 Comments: 1263 Votes: average Share

Two days ago, in biology, the boy to my right asked me if I liked Biffy Clyro. I said "Yeah, they're alright.", to which he replied "They're ALRIGHT?" I said "Yeah. ...Do you like Green Day?" He said "Yeah, they're alright." We both laughed. 4091 meh 2548 #3361801 Comments: 1304 Votes: average Share

Today, I was pining for oatmeal. I decided to work for it by going on a jog. When I came back, I found that the oatmeal packet was empty and Dad was scraping the last of the oatmeal from his bowl. MLIA 4095 meh 2521 #3361981 Comments: 1306 Votes: average Share

To me the only difference about being the only one home is that i play my music louder. MLIA 4157 meh 2538 #3362436 Comments: 676 Votes: average Share

My family was out to dinner at a steakhouse. My dad always orders thousand island dressing for his salad, but today he asked if he could borrow some of my sister's ranch. She said, "Okay - wait, ew, are you going to mix them? Gross!" Just as a waiter approached our table, my dad shouted, "Yes! THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH CROSS-DRESSING." I love my dad. MLIA 6287 meh 34 #3361174 Comments: 23 Votes: average Share

Sometimes, I randomly yell "I cannot feel my tail" for no good reason. 4130 meh 2564 #3361805 Comments: 8 Votes: average Share