Pin 3 30 Shares

Negative thinking is something that I used to struggle with so much… Just like you, I was brought up believing that having negative thoughts meant I was doing life wrong. In fact, most people see negativity as something that needs to be avoided at all cost.

But extensive research is revealing that trying to get rid of thoughts can actually backfire and make them more “pervasive” than ever.

Chances are that if your reading this article, you are probably looking for a solution to stop negative thinking altogether. But if you allow me a few moments of your time, ill show you why the quest for complete freedom from negative thoughts is a fallacy and what you should do instead.

If you want to learn how to stop negative thinking, you need to understand 2 things first…

Bonus: quadruple my confidence. Get free access to the powerful VIDEO COURSE that shows you the 2 things I did to demolish my social anxiety andmy confidence.

1st Thing To Understand:

Negative thinking is a natural and healthy thing to have and its one of humans most valuable assets.

In society today, negative thinking gets a bad rap that it does not deserve. In fact, the staggering amount of bad information on the internet or in books about negative thinking can leave many of us believing that we are “broken” if we think negatively.

But what most people fail to remember is that negative thinking is one of our most useful survival mechanism. Without it, we would not be here today. Negative thinking has kept us alive for hundreds of thousands of years and it has saved your life many time this week, heck even today!

Think about it, what kept you from crossing the road on a red light? Some might argue that it was just a healthy concern for your well being, but this is just another way of saying negative thinking…

Negative thinking is our brain’s ability to quickly imagine the worst case scenario possible and putting it in the forefront of our mind. Humans are bound to think negatively because it is how we are wired. When we try to “stop” negative thinking, we are going against our very nature.

2nd Thing To Understand:

Stopping negative thinking is a battle that cannot be won. Negative thoughts will show up from time to time for the reminder of our lives.

We cannot reach a point where negative thinking will no longer show up, but what we can do is learn how to greatly reduce its effect on us and how to prevent going down a negative spiral. This article will teach you the 3 best ways to do that.

Thought Diffusion Techniques

All of the techniques listed in this article have to do with something called “thought diffusion”. It is a concept developed by the creators of ACT (acceptance and commitment therapy) that seeks to see thoughts for what they are; just thoughts, instead of fusing with them and what they imply.

It is backed by decades of research and is quickly gaining grounds as one of the best and most effective ways to stop negative thinking. I can also see the potency of this technique in my own experience as its the only thing that has worked for me personally. I think it can do the same for you.

Technique #1: Unhooking From The “Mind Machine” By Thanking It

Your “mind machine” is what we call the part of your brain that creates all the thoughts that you think. Most of the time we are unaware that its working 24/7… constantly producing thoughts all day, everyday.

Most people believe that the roots of their suffering (whether it be social anxiety or depression) is thinking negatively, but this is not the case… The truth is that thoughts are nothing more that just words and images created by our brain. Thoughts are not tangible and they cannot hurt us. The problem arises when we forget to see thoughts for what they really are; just thoughts…

“Unhooking” from thoughts or “diffusing” from them is when we take a step back to do exactly that. Instead of fusing with what the thoughts imply, we snap ourselves out and distance ourselves from it.

“Thanks mind machine, thanks for doing what you do best; create thoughts”.

The truth is that we cannot stop our brain from doing what it is meant to do. Our brains are thought creating machines and it can be very easy to fall into the trap of believing every single thought that pop into our minds. But we simply DO NOT have to entertain everyone of our thoughts, we can “unhook” from them simply by realizing that thoughts can only have power over us if we let them.

“Unhooking ” from thoughts means that we prevent ourselves from fusing with what the thought implies. For example, if you’re on your way to a social event and you have the negative thought: “omg, I’m freaking out, everybody is going to think I’m a complete weirdo”, fusing with the thought would mean that you believe the thought and the result will be an increased amount of anxiety.

But “unhooking” or “diffusing” from the thought would mean that you see the negative thinking for what it is; just words and images produced by your brain… Not a glimpse into the future.

A simple way to diffuse from our thoughts is by “thanking” your brain (your mind machine) for doing its job correctly. So it might go something like this:

“Hey, I’m noticing that my brain is telling me that ill look like a weirdo, it’s just doing its job, thanks mind…”

Or

“My brain is telling me that ill look like a weirdo, this is just my evolutionary survival mechanism trying to help me, thanks for looking out for my mind, but I don’t have to believe everything you throw at me”.

You distance yourself from what it says by saying “thanks… but no thanks”. Doing this allows us to look at the situation for what it is; your mind machine just created a thought, nothing more, nothing less… just because your brain tells you that something is going to go wrong doesn’t mean its accurate.

Technique #2: Catch And Label The Thoughts

This technique can actually be a fun little game to play with yourself. The idea is to “catch” your next thought and then put a label on it.

For example if you’re nervous before giving a speech and your mind is racing a million miles per hour and are wondering how to stop negative thinking, you could ask yourself the following question; “what will my next thought be?”

As you sit there waiting attentively for the next thought to pop up in your mind, you might find yourself in a short period of “no-mind” where no thoughts are produced for a couple of seconds. This is normal, but just keep sitting there and wait for the next thought.

Note: Its important to note that when you do this exercise and tell yourself “ok, I’m just waiting on my next thought, where is my next thought”, this is a thought in itself. I can remember when I first started doing this and would forget to realize that me telling myself “where are the damn thoughts, I cant see them” or “this exercise is dumb” are the thoughts I was actually trying to catch. They are no different than any other thoughts.

The goal is to go inside your mind and see what going on. “What thoughts is my brain producing?”

Exercise: You can try this right now, are you able to catch your next thought?

Once you have “caught” your thought, the next step is to simply put a label on it. We do this by recognizing the TYPE of thought it is. Was it a judgmental thought, is it criticizing you, is it a worry thought, is it a sadness thought? See the examples below:

Thought: “She walks funny”.

Label: Judgment

Thought: “I’m such a loser, why am I so darn shy!”

Label: Self-criticizing

Thought: “Everybody is going to think I’m a weirdo”.

Label: Worry

Doing this is my personal favorite and most effective way of stopping negative thinking. It can be tricky to do at first but with a little practice it gets much easier to do and thoughts will just stop affecting you as much.

I think the reason why this technique is so powerful is because the process of catching and then labeling the thoughts automatically diffuses them. You can see that its just your brain creating these thoughts and you become the “watcher” of your brain’s shenanigans instead of being its victim.

Technique #3: Using Negative Thoughts As A Way To Initiate Deep Breathing

Most people don’t know this, but there is a way that you can use negative thinking to actually make you feel more relaxed. Yes you heard right, you can use negative thinking to your advantage by turning your focus on your breath every time you catch yourself thinking negatively.

To do this, switch your goal from “how to stop negative thinking” to “how to use my negative thinking”, where instead of trying to eliminate negative thinking all together, the aim becomes to notice when you are thinking negatively and use it as a calling for deep breathing.

Every time that you are able to catch yourself thinking negatively, pause and use it as an “alarm” to take one, full, slow deep breath.

Here is exactly how I do it: Once I have caught myself thinking negatively, I immediately start focusing on the sensations of the air coming into my nose as I breathe in. Then I focus on the sensations of the air coming out through my mouth as I exhale. I purposefully take very slow and deep breaths.

Its important to try and have all of your undivided attention on the sensations that the air coming in through your nose and out through your mouth creates. Doing this will steer your focus away from the negative thoughts, allowing you to slowly start feeling more relaxed. Also, doing this is a great way to practice meditation as each an every breath you can successfully focus on will make it slightly easier to do again next time.

If you feel confident enough to increase the numbers of breath you take each time you catch yourself having negative thoughts to 3 breaths instated of just one, I highly recommend it. Although it usually takes some practice to be able to focus solely on your breath 3 times in a row.

Conclusion:

So there you have it! The 3 best ways and most efficient ways that I have found as a solution to how to stop negative thinking!

If I was you, I would try all 3 of them and see which one works the best, then stick with that one and practice it until you become a master at it!

Until next time!

Steph