Continue Reading Below Advertisement

I realize I have to step in before the illusion consumes him. "It's OK, it's not a real dragon," I reassure him. He turns around and just stares at me. It hits me that he must be so deep in his immersion that he probably doesn't even recognize me and just sees me as a character in the game. "Forsooth, good sir!" I say. "Thou needeth not slay the dragon forthwith, but pray take thee a five minute break and refresh thyself!" Then I start to play a mirthful tune on the lute I happen to have handy.

He just sighs deeply, turns around in his chair, and goes back to playing the game. I catch my breath. It may already be too late for him.

11:35 am -- GOD FUCKING DAMMIT I MISSED THE TIME TO COLLECT MY MAFIA MONEY AND SOMEBODY ROBBED ME! FUCK THIS FUCKING PIECE OF CRAP IPHONE GAME! ROBIN_248718 SO HELP ME GOD I AM GOING TO KILL YOU AND YOUR WHOLE GANG! I DON'T MEAN IN THE GAME I MEAN I AM GOING TO GET YOUR PERSONAL ACCOUNT INFO FROM APPLE AND I AM GOING TO TRACK YOU DOWN AND PHYSICALLY KILL YOU AND IF THIS IS YOUR MOM'S PHONE I GUESS TOO BAD AND SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR MOM I HOPE YOU HAD MANY WONDERFUL YEARS TOGETHER





Robin_248718's mom. In the next life she will not be letting him play games on her phone.

Continue Reading Below Advertisement

10:25 pm -- Man, are my eyes tired. I've been sitting here in the study monitoring Mike all day and playing iPhone games in between checking on him. I've gotten to level 30 in Crime City, which seems kind of fast. Probably the level scaling is broken or something. I wish some of this shit recharged faster though. The minimum amount of time to collect money from a building is 5 minutes, which leaves me with 5 minutes of nothing to do. Maybe I'll pick up Bejeweled or something to get me through it.