I didn’t mean to spend an hour lying in bed with you

There’s laundry still on the line, it’s been dry for hours,

and dishes waiting to be put away

You usually go right to sleep around this time

with a fluffy clean diaper and fluffy clean pajamas

nursing and sleeping in ten minutes flat

so mama can get back to chores

or a piece of chocolate or a little tv

But tonight you were restless

and you were done nursing

before you were done being awake

so you were tired and had to find

a new way to go to sleep

I knew a trick

that I learned from cats

If I pretended to sleep

Made my breath deep and slow

got close to you and so warm

It would put you out like a light

It works quite often for those cats

who proselytize naps to susceptible humans

I didn’t intend to spend an hour

curled around you in our bed

with my knees drawn up for you to press your feet

and my arm making a circle for your head

languid, breathing deep,

watching the sunset changing

the colors in the window

nothing but sky and wind

and birdsong in the dusk

And someone on a motorbike

You look at me reproachfully

as if it were my muffler that startled you

You squirm and wiggle, wedge tiny fingertips under my arms

tiny toes kicking the blanket away

and resettle, eyes half closed

I’m wrapped around you

fourteen months pregnant

and I whisper

I love you, my sweet baby

and you turn your head

and just look

yes, you know,

you already know

everything important

like how mamas should be quiet

when babies are trying to sleep

And I didn’t know you could hear church bells

on the hour up here

I didn’t intend to spend this hour with you

with your downy head tickling my nose

and your round soft legs

catching the last drops of summer sunlight

I didn’t intend to

but you already know

everything important

so you tricked me

you knew

I needed to.

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