About Romi

Sorry ladies, I'm taken. If you don't care, continue reading.



Laying down the law, here:

- I can only freestyle when I'm angry.

- Occaisional literacy. Sometimes I'm Saturday.

- Inheritor of Many Things and Counting

- Royal blood (assembly required, hex key included)

- Beached Merman, Barnacle Core

- Sometimes I feel like my mind is squishy.

- This is not Sartre.

- Self-proclaimed superpower of knowing exactly where to be and how to get there while simultaneously remaining clueless about where I am or where I'm going.

- Consistent attractor of unwanted metaphors.

- Cannot bale hay or post bail or boast pay in poor weather conditions.

- Esteemed failosopheraptor w/ L.D. 50 of ~ three new moons.

- Encyclopedic knowledge of theoretical and applied folly.

- Memory like a jukebox with Tourrettes.

- I grow on you, like hiccups.



*radio silence*



Options:

- autotune OnStar (snarky trombone noises extra)

- antique clock brakes

- powers tearing wintered ires

- nuke 4rse smell

- self-perking

- sticky leather seats

- exhaust that goes "pop-pop" or that "phshew!" thing

- turbo woofer w/ vomit bags



I just realized that I'm 27.