London four-piece Beach Baby have spent the past three and a half years forming not just a band but a sonic world of their own. Drawing on musical influences from across the world and the past half a century, the friends have just released their debut album No Mind No Money on Island Records and are about to head off on a tour of the US before giving Europe a go too. The record is a soundtrack to those post-uni, pre-figuring it all out years; a series of honest stories on loneliness, apathy and bad relationships. Grow up with them as they edge ever closer to a top 40 spot in the album charts, tour the world, and get real on being in a band in 2016. Less Almost Famous - more nearly big enough to quit the day job. Aspiring musicians, take note!

"If like me, you didn't spend your early years recording and uploading videos of intimate performances to an adoring YouTube faithful (our dial up connection wouldn't permit it) then, like me, you probably belong to that special breed of aspiring musicians who grew up away from developed civilisation, honing their craft with only a Mojo subscription to keep them company. Instead of cultivating a music taste via the labyrinth of online musical content, your's has been formed through a number of sessions listening and re-listening, with your dad, to his limited number of LPs.

In today's industry, the cult of the individual reigns supreme - it's a landscape of egos and aliases populated by vibrant soft synths, masterfully programmed drum machines and an ever-expanding library of ornamental samples. But fear not, THE GUITAR BAND IS NOT DEAD! Those teenage bedroom years spent laboriously mastering all those George Harrison licks, don't have to be wasted ones. There's still time to put them to good use, as long as you are prepared to make a few concessions. Here's my guide to life in a band in 2016..."

MONEY

"The first issue to contend with is the business of finance. Get yourself a day job. It might seem a little perverse to begin with seemingly unrelated advice, but you must be prepared to take a string of bizarre and often demoralising work. If you find yourself picking up leaves with your bare hands (for reasons unknown, you've been denied a rake) at seven pounds per hour on the Battersea Thames Path, don't sweat it, keep your head down and just remind yourself that Mick Jagger worked in a pet shop once.

Ideally you'll find something flexible with an employer who can pay you far more money for far less demeaning work AND who is relaxed about your continuing absences through touring. If you do, then.... 'Right on, Brother'! Personally, I tend to veer towards the 'gardening/waiting tables/moving furniture for people' line of work. It's not exactly glamorous, but I'm pretty much without any sort of valuable skill set, outside of my ability to name any Beatles' song from it's opening two seconds. Be imaginative, bandmates of mine have ghostwritten chick-lit (mentioning no names) and another worked for the NHS in a psychiatric ward. Just remember, There is no ceiling to the obscurity of work that accompanies life in the early stages of budding rock-stardom."

DRIVING

"I should probably say now that I don't have a driving license, not through lack of effort, more due to a pathological fear of driving tests - I have failed five times. So, this next pointer is served with a generous helping of hypocrisy.

It's already been well documented, but the bond that exists between a band and it's Transit van is verging on unbreakable, it's a love/hate affair older than time itself. Think of it as an man/automotive 'Ross and Rachel', quarrelling lovers who eventually do the right and proper thing. If you want to keep your bandmates on side, then being able to contribute to the countless hours spent driving up and down the M1 is a great place to start.

Failing that, if you can make yourself into a bearable passenger, then, that'll do too. The criteria here are pretty simple, stay awake during long late night journeys and get a good data plan on your 'phone - Google maps will gobble up your measly 2gb per month allowance in just one trip up to the Hull 'Adelphi'. If you've got a few long distance car journey games up your sleeve, then nicely played, that's a bonus. A game we like to call 'Celebrity Film Tennis' is a tried and tested time-muncher. The rules are simple: you rally back and forth by taking it in turns to name as many films as possible that a chosen actor or actress has appeared in. This continues until eventually someone summons from the deepest & darkest recesses of known human memory a fearsome 'down-the-line backhand winner', namely - Before Nightfalls, the Spanish language movie that Johnny Depp cameo-ed in in the mid 90's. Sorry guys, I am just too proud of that one!"

SHOWS

"Go and watch some! Hardly a revelation, but feeling reluctant about seeing live music is certainly something I've been guilty of in the past. When you spend much of your professional life loitering around dank spaces, whilst being marshalled through a soundcheck by an engineer who, quite frankly, would rather burn your amplifier than spend 3 seconds putting a microphone in front of it - it's ALMOST understandable why you might not be overjoyed at the prospect of heading to Shepherd's Bush's Ginglik on a rainy Tuesday night. I mean, who in their right mind would make a gig venue out of an old public toilet anyway? But have faith, there is enjoyment to be had, in fact it might even be good for you. You might even meet other musicians and share funny stories and trade tips. You might even meet somebody who you make a real connection with and who is ACTUALLY free to play keyboard on your upcoming warm up tour of the North Circular! If that's not a large enough incentive, then just think of all the A&R interns there you can bore with your intentions of being one of the only bands to record a double LP for your debut album. But on a serious note, try to go and see your heroes perform - it's a reminder of why you thought about trying to write songs in the first place."

HOBBIES

"eBay? Have you heard of it? If not, allow me to introduce you to the Death Star of procrastination for stay-at-home musicians. If you're a musician who's into e-Bay, I've got one piece of advice - get yourself a pet/hobby/girlfriend/boyfriend/anything that gets you out of the house and away from that vintage 70s 'Univox Hi-Flier'..... Yes, it's good value for a vintage instrument of that profile, but its way out of your budget and what's more, if you acquire it, you'll be in breach of the the agreed quota of guitars allowed to you by your girlfriend in the room you share with her. Personally, I've found that dog-walking is the kind of thing you should be doing to combat this. Not only is it a good way of keeping my PayPal in good health, it also goes a long way towards calming all the nervous energy I've generated from watching the clock run down on the auction of that totally not needed 'Casiotone'!

Sporting hobbies are useful on the road as well. There's quite nothing like a pre-show kick about with the support band, it really helps to show them who's boss. Joking aside, if you're reading this Babeheaven, you were one man up and that last goal looked offside to me, so technically, that Waitrose car park showdown in Guildford outside the Boiler Room was a draw. If you're not into football that's ok, but whatever you do, don't EVER bring a Nerf with you on the road......... But that's a story for another time."

SONGS

"KEEP WRITING THEM! There is really no substitute! Having the skills, talent and application to write and record your own music is such an amazing privilege, no one will ever be able to take it away from you. Listen to your bandmates and write the music that you want to write, if you're into it then there's a good chance someone else will be too. Keeping that spirit alive is perhaps the single most important component to your chances of success on any scale. If you find your aspirations or motivation dwindling then maybe you're due a visit to that teenage bedroom where it all started…"

Beach Baby play London's Scala this Friday 9 September. Tickets available here.

Credits

Text Ollie Pash

Photography Lily Rose Thomas