Get a vasectomy as soon as you can. If you don’t have the self-discipline to use a condom, at least with a vasectomy you won’t have to worry about another unwanted mouth to feed.

Second, get tested for STDs. If you’ve slept with multiple partners without using protection, there’s a high chance you’ve caught something.

If you find you have an STD, tell the girls and any other partner you’ve ever had so they too can take the steps to get treated.

Let this be a lesson that safe sex is important and condoms were invented for a bloody reason.

While doing that, figure out how much it would cost to feed and clothe three kids (and this is without planning for things like paying four years of even state college for three people). Once you’ll notice the accumulative number is in the millions, make plans for getting paying jobs immediately.

Don’t drop out of school though, the job market is the most cold-hearted bitch out there and without a HS degree you’re fucked, same as if you don’t have a BA. Nowadays, BAs are the equivalent of HS degrees in some job requisites.

So, calculate for that too.

Next, after the harrowing numbers that this lack of basic common sense is going to cost you, see if there’s any hope left in your life.

Talk to the girls.

If you’re lucky, at least one of them will have the common sense to realize babies shouldn’t raise babies. If that’s the case, either the girl will want an abortion or to give the kid up for adoption.

If that’s the case, pay for the abortion yourself. That’s the much cheaper price than actually having to pay for a kid’s needs in the future. Plus, you had a hand in creating the problem, the least you could do is be part of the solution by paying for the abortion.

If she prefers adoption, be a part of it. The faster you find a suitable family who wants kids and likes them to adopt your kid, the better. Go to the screenings and talk to social workers about this.

If you’re really lucky and there is in fact a deity looking out for you, they’ll all want to give the kid up for adoption or go through an abortion.

If the majority or all want to keep the baby and won’t even hear about giving it up for abortion, this is the time to have an honest talk with them and your folks.

And an honest talk with yourself too.

I’m assuming that, like most kids, you don’t want to give up your dreams and freedom to raise a kid.

Tough titty.

This is what happens when you don’t practice safe sex. Condoms, the pill, IUDs, and reversible vasectomies exist for a damned reason.

First off, be an adult and gather all three girls together and tell them that you got all three pregnant if they don’t already know. Deal with the fallout maturely, and if that means taking it as they yell at you, do it.

Second, if the fallout was too big, wait a week before talking to all of the girls together again. This time, it’s about the babies and what should be done.

Come prepared for this talk as it will be important for the rest of your lives.

Bring sheets and charts that explain with concrete examples about how much money it would cost to raise ONE kid in an even remotely acceptable manner (i.e. keep them clothed, fed, and under a roof).

Likewise, have a battle plan ready for how every single one of you is going to finish High School and at least get an Associate’s Degree to get acceptable paying jobs.

Have a battle plan that you discussed with your parents on who is going to be your support. Do your parents support you? Do they want nothing to do with this?

Know this information beforehand and let them know who is or isn’t going to be there to help. Ask them also if they have people on their side who will or won’t support them.

Start scheduling for years in advance and talking about jobs you could all do as teens.

If any of the girls gets spooked by the amount of work actually raising a baby entails, have a conversation about how there is no shame in adoption and that people who are already adults would be better equipped to raise a kid.

Keep it factual but don’t try to manipulate her. It’s still her choice, even if keeping the baby without considering adoption is foolish at her age.

If all of them are still determined to see this through, coordinate with them on how much of a part of the kids’ lives your going to be.

If that’s the case, you can kiss goodbye to your childhood and freedom.

Good luck in finding a job, keep up with your studies, find sleep when you can, and remember that condoms are sacred.