Self Help books work, but there is still the application of what the book says that will take us farther.

Do Self Help Books Work – The battle between theory and application

I have been interested in self help books ever since I was a child, and it probably stems from the fact that I like knowing the ins and outs of a subject before I practice it. When I was young, I wanted to become a body builder, so I read books about nutrition, naturally. Nutrition books really aren’t self help books, but the fact that the nutrition books helped me understand biology, chemicals, nutrition, and their effects on the body (the “why, and how”), lead me to believe that knowing the “why”, helps you achieve the goal. This type of thinking is actually driven into us at a young age, and for an example, look at how we learn math. Learning math starts with the basics, and we build upon them. Later, we use the past knowledge we have gathered to help us answer more complicated questions, even when some aspects of our past math lessons don’t help directly, but indirectly. This type of thinking is how I have been using, and effectively utilizing, self help books.

Do Self Help Books Work – Yes, but you must practice

Self help books definitely work, I mean honestly, look at the market share they have in the literature world. Self help books do work, but like all things, they only work as well as you can practice what they teach. Similar to most things in life, if you practice them, you get better. If you read a self help book on happiness, and practice none of the lessons on them, then the book will be useless. Another example:

Let’s say you really want to run a marathon. Good for you! You go to the store and pick out the book “How to run a marathon in 6 months”. In the book, it lists several different components that are necessary for your completion of a marathon:

You must run 5 days a week, while increasing your distance

You must eat a well balanced diet

You must rest 8 hours a day

Maybe some meditation

Etc etc etc

So, at first you are all excited to run that marathon, and after 6 months, you end up only running 2 days a week, eat trash food everyday, and party every night so your rest is abysmal. If you start puking within the first 10 miles of your marathon and then quit, you cannot blame the book, oh no, you can only blame yourself. This is how self help books work – you have to read them then do what they say to do.

Do self help books work – Pick something you actually want to change

Humans are better at things they are passionate about, and you should be passionate about whatever book you purchase, especially if you want to gain anything from it. Here is why:

If you stop reading it, it won’t help you

If you think the author sucks, you won’t read it

If you only want to read the book, but not apply what it says, it won’t help you

If you only want the book to feel good about trying to help yourself, it won’t help you. You have to do not just read.

If you are passionate about the book and the subject matter it covers, you are much more likely to finish the book, apply the mechanics therein, and benefit from it. Lets take a look at Bob, who really wants to get a first date.

Self help books – Bob’s Journey

Bob really wants to go on a date with Jessica, however, Bob is really scared and wants to learn about being a perfect gentleman. Bob goes online and buys “Being a Gentleman – The Definitive Guide to Being Irresistible”. Bob starts to read the book, and he is extremely excited about what he is reading so far. However, he gets to chapter 5 “Ask her out”. At this point, Bob continues reading the chapter, but never actually asks Jessica out. After reading the past four chapters before this, all that help Bob become a gentleman, he now decided to not apply the lessons in chapter 5 to ask Jessica out, therefore, the purpose of the book and the benefits that it offer no longer help Bob out because he doesn’t apply what it says. While Bob may have become 4 chapters closer to being a better gentleman, he never was able to get that date. The self help book didn’t fail Bob, Bob failed himself.

Self Help Books – Accountability is everything

If you are like Bob, you simply cannot blame the book (and of course, his book wasn’t guaranteeing he would get the date, only that to be a gentleman, he would ask out Jessica in such and such way, increasing his odds). Remember, Bob bought the book so he could ask Jessica out, which he never ended up doing because he gave up at the last minute, so he wasn’t able to gain what the book had intended him to gain. While some books aren’t the best (and may not help you), you have to make sure that you follow through with that which is asked of you.

Do self help books work? Of course!

In closing, choose a subject you are passionate about (I read books on body language all the time) and practice what the book says. If you follow those guidelines, you will benefit from a self help book, because self help books do work.