It doesn’t have to be a “slow news day” to sit back and appreciate the talents of the greatest Photoshoppers on the Internet.

Reddit user Killer_Cherry_Pie challenged these Photoshop Battle pros to work their magic on a bubble-bending picture of a thirsty gastropod sippin’ on a droplet of water:

If you’re not familiar with Photoshop Battles, here’s how they work: A random photo is presented. Anybody in the community can participate. All you need to do is edit the image as you please and submit your work in the comments section.

The battle got off on the right (mucus-lined, cilia-covered) foot when redditors took us on a tour of the snail’s film credits.

User blue_awning offered a sneak peek at the snail’s starring role in the next Kevin James film: Paul Blart: Mollusk Cop.

User peter2peter posted this still from the snail’s villainous turn as a soul-sucking Dementor:

Ironically, the snail was turned down for the role of Professor Slughorn, the slow-motion potions professor from Slitherin’. (Reddit user 2peter2)

And user 2Thebreezes reminded everyone of the snail’s 1977 break-out role as Princess Leia’s hairpiece:

Soon, more Photoshop enthusiasts came out of their shells to show how the snail was moving (slowly) from acting to politics:

Naturally, it was important for user Captain_McFiesty to bring up the snail’s track record:

As with most politicians, the snail had some explaining to do regarding its college years when user MMM_Lickity_Split unearthed this controversial dorm-room scene:

(Note the attention to detail in the poster behind the snail’s desk: the cover of Playsnail Magazine. Article titles include “50 Really Slow Sex Techniques” and “Avoiding Table Salt”—because everyone knows you only read Playsnail for the articles, right?)

But in the end, this was another Battle decided by the gifs.

Reddit user gnostic_cat brought the heat with this image of a larger-than-life snail consuming the tiny world contained within the watery dome:

But user satitanic brought it back to the snail’s film career, with one simple, battle-ending caption: “D’OH!”

The battle may’ve inched along slowly, but the final verdict from the spectators was clear:

Check out the full thread to see even more carefully crafted pics from the Photoshop pros, as they fight tooth and snail in yet another battle for the ages.