Cohen’s article reminds me of when Gwyneth Paltrow tried that “William Joel” crap in the GOOP newsletter a few years back.

I’ve been working in politics for a long time, and I’ve noticed one thing eerily in common with celebrities: when you hit it big, you’d be surprised how many people claim to have known you “back in the day” and other such nonsense. At least once a week, I hearhear my boss say, “I don’t know who the fuck this person is. Furthermore, I was never at [school, town, vacation spot, event, wedding, whatever].”



My former bosses and current boss were never major players, but that doesn’t stop lobbyists, reporters, and constituents from lubing up and shoving their noses up politicians’ butts.



If anyone is bragging about being BFF with a a politician — especially someone like Cohen who is trying way too hard to downplay everything when in reality he’s BEGGING YOU to think he’s cool — then they want something. They might not want it now, but they want something: bragging rights, information, influence, being seen somewhere with this person, a butt wiper, etc.



Cohen, you’ll never sit at the cool kid’s table to knock it off.

